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So a vegan just left the dinner table to sit outside

Sephzilla

Member
Oh grow up people. These are the kind of stone age attitudes we need to move past. We don't fucking whine about it. We eat what we get. But how fucking nice would you feel if you were invited somewhere, and the table is full of food, and then out on the far corner are a few bowls with the crap you can eat?

It will make you think that maybe we'll just decline next time. It's not like cooking a vegan meal for one day is gonna require a lot from, well, anyone. It's as simple as saying "let's try a vegan lasanga tonight instead of the one we usually make".

How does it make sense to instead make one ordinary lasagna, then maybe one extra lasagna, or maybe not an extra vegan lasagna. The vegans can just eat the lettuce, right? They like that.

How hard is it to understand that cooking a vegan meal is just that, a meal? We're having the vegans over, so let's try a vegan one! It's not like it's dangerous. Heøl, you might even like it.

can eat =/= choose to eat
 
"Eh, I won't have a problem with them eating fish."

"Now that I'm actually here, it does actually bother me, even though I thought it wouldn't."

Then you explain that, and don't act like a dick when questioned about it later.

I won't argue about this since I know you want to hate him :p

you're being intentionally dense about what I'm saying.

The only thing dense is trying to plan a dinner with non-vegans when you have an issue being around cooked meat. If there was the chance it would bother him that much, why do dinner? This seems like real common sense stuff.

I make vegan jokes because they are easy. In actuality though, people don't fuck with me, I don't fuck with them. This isn't a vegan thing, this is either being an intentional asshole, or someone who completely lacks the ability to consider things outside a two-foot/two-minute sphere.

It isn't a good look, and it has little to do with his food preferences.
 

zoukka

Member
Actually, I would go outside with a big piece of fish and
giphy.gif

So you both could be asshole-bros together? Cool.
 
damn you got a Peaks avatar but you are a piece of crap. Hmmm.

Vegan dude in OP acted like a little baby but I think people could show more respect towards people's choices. Like Illitarati is most likely joking above, but I bet some people would actually act similar to his post which makes you just as bad as the guy storming out of the dinner because people are eating fish in front of him.

Like I tried to demonstrate, I'm just straight up being absurd. Seriously though, having respect for others choices means that a vegan and a meat eater should be able to eat their respective meals in the same room. Him leaving would signal not having respect for me. In real life I would not escalate, but in thread life I sure as hell would.
 

Hilbert

Deep into his 30th decade
Oh grow up people. These are the kind of stone age attitudes we need to move past. We don't fucking whine about it. We eat what we get. But how fucking nice would you feel if you were invited somewhere, and the table is full of food, and then out on the far corner are a few bowls with the crap you can eat?

It will make you think that maybe we'll just decline next time. It's not like cooking a vegan meal for one day is gonna require a lot from, well, anyone. It's as simple as saying "let's try a vegan lasanga tonight instead of the one we usually make".

How does it make sense to instead make one ordinary lasagna, then maybe one extra lasagna, or maybe not an extra vegan lasagna. The vegans can just eat the lettuce, right? They like that.

How hard is it to understand that cooking a vegan meal is just that, a meal? We're having the vegans over, so let's try a vegan one! It's not like it's dangerous. Heøl, you might even like it.

Hahaha, as someone who grew up with allergies, I know exactly how this is. I never cared like you do though.
 

Somnid

Member
It's over the top for sure but as someone who has recently come into conflict with their family over their SO's eating choices, accept it and move on. Do not get offended over how someone wishes to consume food lest you become the asshole. Try to find a middle ground.
 

norm9

Member
Why, why the aggression here? And just why would animal free clothing be so hard (Vegans you know usually research stuff, including glue).

I don't think I was being aggressive. As the poster below wrote, some vegans still buy leather goods, etc. If a person comes across as a hardcore vegan, you bet I'm going to take a chance and see how devoted they are to their cause and laugh at their hypocrisy.
 

Pinkuss

Member
I don't think I was being aggressive. As the poster below wrote, some vegans still buy leather goods, etc. If a person comes across as a hardcore vegan, you bet I'm going to take a chance and see how devoted they are to their cause and laugh at their hypocrisy.

It's snidey. Some Vegans keep their pre Vegan clothes, who's to judge. Not saying you are but there a hell of a lot more meat eaters judging on here and in general (And I've been at this 11 years, Veggie for 15 before, it's pretty clear). Apparently we preach though, but the jump on the Vegan bandwagon is a force that goes down well around here and various other parts.
 

GodofWine

Member
Like..What was he suspecting? no one in your sisters family to eat meat?

Sounds like a pompous douche and I wouldn't ever invite him back.
 
If I were the parents I probably would have asked beforehand if he was comfortable with everyone else eating non-vegan food. Seems like it could've been easily avoided. I can't really blame someone with the moral values of a vegan for not wanting to dine at a table with people eating meat.
 

haimon

Member
Oh grow up people. These are the kind of stone age attitudes we need to move past. We don't fucking whine about it. We eat what we get. But how fucking nice would you feel if you were invited somewhere, and the table is full of food, and then out on the far corner are a few bowls with the crap you can eat?

It will make you think that maybe we'll just decline next time. It's not like cooking a vegan meal for one day is gonna require a lot from, well, anyone. It's as simple as saying "let's try a vegan lasanga tonight instead of the one we usually make".

How does it make sense to instead make one ordinary lasagna, then maybe one extra lasagna, or maybe not an extra vegan lasagna. The vegans can just eat the lettuce, right? They like that.

How hard is it to understand that cooking a vegan meal is just that, a meal? We're having the vegans over, so let's try a vegan one! It's not like it's dangerous. Heøl, you might even like it.

So if I go to a vegan restaurant they should have a non vegan dish to serve me to respect what I like?
 

Nafai1123

Banned
I'm not sure how walking away from a family dinner, in which people went out of their way to make you a vegan dish, is anything but disrespectful. Dinner is a social gathering. Leaving the table in the middle of dinner shows a complete lack of respect for those who cooked the food you are about to eat.
 

Surfinn

Member
It's snidey. Some Vegans keep their pre Vegan clothes, who's to judge. Not saying you are but there a hell of a lot more meat eaters judging on here and in general (And I've been at this 11 years, Veggie for 15 before, it's pretty clear).
It's weird cuz there's often this bizarre assumption that if you're vegan CLEARLY you think you're better than everyone. It's like the moral Olympics once people know
 

Pinkuss

Member
So if I go to a vegan restaurant they should have a non vegan dish to serve me to respect what I like?

Are you stupid. If you go to an Italian place and want Korean then you are being an idiot. You're an omnivore, so am I... most places serve us (you aren't a carnivore and you don't and probably shouldn't live on exclusively animal based food...)
 

Futureman

Member
I think it's fair to say that Veganism WORKS PEOPLE UP LIKE NOTHING ELSE.

Like it really gets people's blood boiling "How dare they not eat meat and say it's wrong!"

I'm only vegetarian so I'm only being slightly judgey here (ha), but I think it's because deep down most people realize that the conditions that most animals live in are pure shit and they shouldn't be supporting it, but hey, meat does taste amazing, life is short and who cares...

Just be respectful would go a long way. Like I guarantee some of the people that are straight up making fun of vegans and their lifestyle in here are anti-Trump partly because of his pathetic bullying behavior. Well guess what you are doing.
 

Quixzlizx

Member
So if I go to a vegan restaurant they should have a non vegan dish to serve me to respect what I like?

No, they should serve everyone at the restaurant non-vegan dishes in order for you not to feel bad about being the only one eating a non-vegan dish.
 

driggonny

Banned
Then you explain that, and don't act like a dick when questioned about it later.



The only thing dense is trying to plan a dinner with non-vegans when you have an issue being around cooked meat. If there was the chance it would bother him that much, why do dinner? This seems like real common sense stuff.

I make vegan jokes because they are easy. In actuality though, people don't fuck with me, I don't fuck with them. This isn't a vegan thing, this is either being an intentional asshole, or someone who completely lacks the ability to consider things outside a two-foot/two-minute sphere.

It isn't a good look, and it has little to do with his food preferences.

Maybe he never thought he'd have an issue being around cooked meat. Didn't think of a chance. Are you seriously saying it's impossible that he was surprised? We can be pretty blind to how we feel until forced to face the situation tbh

I'm not personally vegan btw
 

jph139

Member
It isn't a good look, and it has little to do with his food preferences.

You realize that veganism isn't a food preference though, right? It's a moral stance.

Like, I don't like tomatoes, so I don't eat them. But if I'm at a friend's house and they serve me something with tomato I'll suck it up. That's a food preference.

But I have a moral objection to, say, torturing cats. If I'm at a friend's house and he starts torturing a cat, I'm not gonna just hang out and look the other way on cat torture.

I'm not asking if you agree with his moral stance, or think it's reasonable. But you understand why tolerating something you find distasteful is different than tolerating something you find immoral, right?
 

Pinkuss

Member
It's weird cuz there's often this bizarre assumption that if you're vegan CLEARLY you think you're better than everyone. It's like an instant moral challenge once people know

We don't though, we just abstain from animal products for moral reasons. I can't control anyone and I'm doing little outside of animal rights (and a little enviromental stuff) but apparently we're scum and deserve bashing constantly.

Just to clarify this wasn't defensive against Veganism, just poor arguments in general. Someone tried to argue tennis was a good argument earlier against Veganism; ignoring a few big tennis stars are Vegan and their are synthetic rackets... did make my day.
 
I don't think I was being aggressive. As the poster below wrote, some vegans still buy leather goods, etc. If a person comes across as a hardcore vegan, you bet I'm going to take a chance and see how devoted they are to their cause and laugh at their hypocrisy.

You dont see how this is aggressive? Really?
 
I would have been pissed but would have calmed down. Don't think I could have ignored him though... would have asked his position on vaccines on his way out the door and leave it at that until he brings it up.

As a carnivore, I would not walk out on family time if they were serving me a vegetarian meal. That would be rude of me. I guess vegetarians are just more intolerant than carnivores/omnivores.

It's silly and childlike. Like he just discovered her whole family aren't vegans.

If you expect me to be tolerant of your lifestyle, why make a fuss out of mine?

I am NOT changing my eating habits for half a week because you're a special, unique vegan who is above seeing others eat meat as human have for thousands of years. Damn... even made him a vegan meal and he took it outside lol. He couldn't sit on the couch? WOW.
 

Ralemont

not me
Oh grow up people. These are the kind of stone age attitudes we need to move past. We don't fucking whine about it. We eat what we get. But how fucking nice would you feel if you were invited somewhere, and the table is full of food, and then out on the far corner are a few bowls with the crap you can eat?

If I was ever invited to a vegan home and they had somehow made me a non-vegan meal on the side I'd feel very appreciated and humbled. They have their beliefs but wanted me to feel comfortable and enjoy my night with them so they prepared a completely separate dish for me? That's awesome, these guys are friends.
 
I think it's fair to say that Veganism WORKS PEOPLE UP LIKE NOTHING ELSE.

Like it really gets people's blood boiling "How dare they not eat meat and say it's wrong!"

I'm only vegetarian so I'm only being slightly judgey here (ha), but I think it's because deep down most people realize that the conditions that most animals live in are pure shit and they shouldn't be supporting it, but hey, meat does taste amazing, life is short and who cares...

Just be respectful would go a long way. Like I guarantee some of the people that are straight up making fun of vegans and their lifestyle in here are anti-Trump partly because of his pathetic bullying behavior. Well guess what you are doing.
Who said "how dare they not eat meat and say its wrong!" I must have missed those posts. And LOL at comparing people to Trump. Nice one. People have issue with the attitude on display here by the family member who was shown respect by having a vegan meal prepared for them just to excuse themselves from the table cuz the fam was eating fish.
 

Surfinn

Member
I think it's fair to say that Veganism WORKS PEOPLE UP LIKE NOTHING ELSE.

Like it really gets people's blood boiling "How dare they not eat meat and say it's wrong!"

I'm only vegetarian so I'm only being slightly judgey here (ha), but I think it's because deep down most people realize that the conditions that most animals live in are pure shit and they shouldn't be supporting it, but hey, meat does taste amazing, life is short and who cares...

Just be respectful would go a long way. Like I guarantee some of the people that are straight up making fun of vegans and their lifestyle in here are anti-Trump partly because of his pathetic bullying behavior. Well guess what you are doing.
Agree with most of this. And just cuz you're vegan or vegetarian doesn't mean you're suddenly up on a high horse or that you're incapable of being wrong or hypocritical
 

KHarvey16

Member
You realize that veganism isn't a food preference though, right? It's a moral stance.

Like, I don't like tomatoes, so I don't eat them. But if I'm at a friend's house and they serve me something with tomato I'll suck it up. That's a food preference.

But I have a moral objection to, say, torturing cats. If I'm at a friend's house and he starts torturing a cat, I'm not gonna just hang out and look the other way on cat torture.

I'm not asking if you agree with his moral stance, or think it's reasonable. But you understand why tolerating something you find distasteful is different than tolerating something you find immoral, right?

They're both entirely subjective personal preferences. One doesn't "deserve" more respect than the other.
 
You realize that veganism isn't a food preference though, right? It's a moral stance.

Like, I don't like tomatoes, so I don't eat them. But if I'm at a friend's house and they serve me something with tomato I'll suck it up. That's a food preference.

But I have a moral objection to, say, torturing cats. If I'm at a friend's house and he starts torturing a cat, I'm not gonna just hang out and look the other way on cat torture.

I'm not asking if you agree with his moral stance, or think it's reasonable. But you understand why tolerating something you find distasteful is different than tolerating something you find immoral, right?

Maybe it's a poor choice of wording, but it was clearly meant as something that his body would not physically reject like an allergy.

You dig? Way too many ways this could have been avoided for any other vegan.
 
If I was ever invited to a vegan home and they had somehow made me a non-vegan meal on the side I'd feel very appreciated and humbled. They have their beliefs but wanted me to feel comfortable and enjoy my night with them so they prepared a completely separate dish for me? That's awesome, these guys are friends.
But you have no reason to be upset witnessing the consumption of vegan food.
 
C

Contica

Unconfirmed Member
What an hilariously un-self aware post loool.

Pleade elaborate.

They don't have to though. I'm not going to a Vegan's house and expecting a burger.

They're on vacation...it's not ONE MEAL.

And why is this a problem?

You sound self-absorbed to me.

Speaking of lasagna, I don't like dishes that are smothered in melted cheese. So when I ate at a family function where a dish like that was going to be the main course, there'd be pasta and sauce for me. I appreciated that effort instead of being bitter that everyone else was eating something different from me, because that makes no fucking sense, honestly.



A vegan not liking meat is a revelation?

Yes, I am highly self absorbed. Every vegan is.

this is rubbish. Im from india and we often have many ppl who are vegetarian. (In fact many indian dishes are vegan too) . If we have someoen coming over who doesnt like non vegetarian we dont make everything vegetarian. If you go out with someone who is vegetarian we dont all order only vegetarian. The host usually makes their normal food and something extra for the vegetarian person. Of course if the vegetarian person is the host then it usually is all vegetarian. In fact some vegetarian hosts who used to be non vegetarian sometimes even go the extra mile and cook something non vegetarian for guests even if they eat only vegetarian. The minority food preference is accodmodated with a extra dish or two. Not by upending the entire meal.


I'm not talking about tables full of various dishes. Where I'm from, it's usually one meal. So we have one meal, then an extra vegan meal. Calling me self absorbed for thinking it would be an overall nicer experience for everyone involved if we all had the same, is just ridiculous to me.

I'm not asking for five vegan meals on a table, that would be insane to ask. It's like, when I have my gluten allergic couson over for dinner. I cook a gluten free meal for everyone. When we're at someone else's, she gets a gluten free alternative to what everyone else eats, and she just sits there clearly wishing she could partake. It actually feels very nice when you're not singled out as the odd one out for once.

If anyone's self absorbed, it's people who actually think this is a lot to ask. It's not.

But I'm a bit tense about all this. I've often had to bring my own food to dinners. I don't complain, but I find it fucking stupid. But yeah, that people think having a vegan dinner is somewhat a huge ordeal is just weird to me.
 
I am not vegan not have any intention of ever becoming one but why do people wanna stick it to them so bad? Does their moral compass bug you so much that you need to berate them and prod at every chance? I don't give a fuck about the hypocrisy in various aspects of people's lives, why do I give a fuck if a vegan has a leather belt?
 
If I was ever invited to a vegan home and they had somehow made me a non-vegan meal on the side I'd feel very appreciated and humbled. They have their beliefs but wanted me to feel comfortable and enjoy my night with them so they prepared a completely separate dish for me? That's awesome, these guys are friends.

A vegan would never do that for you though.
 
Sounds perfectly reasonable. A quick google search shows the abhorrent process of putting animal products on our table - perhaps it made him feel uneasy. It doesn't sound like he had any ulterior motive. He simply didn't feel comfortable.

And the way he chose to convey his feelings of the abhorrent process of animal products simply implied a conduct of ulterior motive.
 

OraleeWey

Member
"My brother-in-law picked on me for being vegan, so I went outside and ate."

Even if the OP is a jerk, you still act like an adult and eat with family.

Yeah but that's assuming the family are on good terms in the first place. Can't just base your opinion on one side of the story. I still want to hear what the sister and her SO have to say but, that's not going to happen is it? So for this situation, I have no strong feelings one way or the other.
 
I have no problem with vegans; hell I've been on vegan diets several times! But the OPs brother in law was being an asshole. He was a guest at someone's house, and he disrespected the hosts who even went out of their way to provide some vegan dishes.
 

Futureman

Member
Who said "how dare they not eat meat and say its wrong!" I must have missed those posts. And LOL at comparing people to Trump. Nice one. People have issue with the attitude on display here by the family member who was shown respect by having a vegan meal prepared for them just to excuse themselves from the table cuz the fam was eating fish.

I'm making more of a general point than speaking to the incident in the OP. Vegans get shit on all the time. It's part of the reason they act so defensively, because they constantly get shit on.

Like there are dozens of posts in here about people saying OP should taunt his brother in law with meat.
 

Orbis

Member
Maybe he never thought he'd have an issue being around cooked meat. Didn't think of a chance. Are you seriously saying it's impossible that he was surprised? We can be pretty blind to how we feel until forced to face the situation tbh

I'm not personally vegan btw
I find it incredibly hard to believe that a dinner with other humans never crossed his mind as a potential moral minefield, when a good number of other humans consume meat. Additionally, I find it very hard to believe it would be such a surprising event that he couldn't have simply waited until after said dinner before having a chat with his partner and say "I found it uncomfortable eating at a table with meat present, perhaps we shouldn't do it again". Then a discussion could be had, the family can compromise by either cooking a fully vegan meal next time, or perhaps eating at separate tables. Instead his unexpected reaction has now potentially upset relationships with the family.
 

Quixzlizx

Member
If anyone's self absorbed, it's people who actually think this is a lot to ask. It's not.

But I'm a bit tense about all this. I've often had to bring my own food to dinners. I don't complain, but I find it fucking stupid. But yeah, that people think having a vegan dinner is somewhat a huge ordeal is just weird to me.

What would you call expecting everyone around you to cater to your whims other than self-absorbed?

I mean, you're even bitter that other people actually do cater to your whims by cooking you separate dishes because they aren't partaking in your whims.
 

GodofWine

Member
If I was ever invited to a vegan home and they had somehow made me a non-vegan meal on the side I'd feel very appreciated and humbled. They have their beliefs but wanted me to feel comfortable and enjoy my night with them so they prepared a completely separate dish for me? That's awesome, these guys are friends.

Yea, Im right here on this.

I've cooked for mixed company too, and the people eating the Cannelloni, Kale and Parmesan Pasta, didn't have to go eat out on my f'ing porch because the other people were enjoying some (quite banging) braised short ribs..like, we all ate what we liked, drank some wine, and had a good time.
 

Bronetta

Ask me about the moon landing or the temperature at which jet fuel burns. You may be surprised at what you learn.
Im reading this thread while enjoying some delicious ass chicken strips.

Thank God for meat.
 
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