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Nobody wants to cyber with me :( (filthy chat logs inside!)

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emomoonbase

I'm free 2night after my LARPing guild meets.
Man, talk about rejection. I can't even get ppl to cyber with me. Maybe you guys can tell me where I went wrong.
Emomoonbase has entered private room
AussieDave37 has entered private room
Emomoonbase~ hi thur
AussieDave37~ Hi, what do you wanna do tonight?
Emomoonbase~ lets get naked and see what happens lol
AussieDave37~ I unbutton your shirt and begin to reach for your pants
Emomoonbase~ I whip out my hulking cock and blast you with my hot sticky jizz!
AussieDave37~ You a dude?
Emomoonbase~ u were so gr8
AussieDave37 has left private room

Emomoonbase has entered private room
sexysarah000 has entered private room
sexysarah000~ hi
Emomoonbase~ hi 2 u!
sexysarah000~ want to know what I'm wearing?
Emomoonbase~ k
sexysarah000~ I'm wearing a black lace bra I got from VS and it has purple straps
sexysarah000~and it has matching panties that are a thong in the back
sexysarah000~I have on sockings that are black and sher so you can see through
Emomoonbase~ I whip out my hulking cock and blast you with my hot sticky jizz!
sexysarah000~and around my neck I have a black fether boa that I can use for other things
Emomoonbae~k thnx bye
sexysarah000~I also have spike heels that blac and satin
sexysarah000~hello?

Maybe I have the wrong name. Time to change it up some...

CybaSista420 has entered private room
AussieDave37 has entered private room
AussieDave37~asl?
CybaSista420~ F/20/ LA you?
AussieDave37~ M/29/ dallas
CybaSista420~ not from australia
AussieDave37~ Ha, no, I wish though.
CybaSista420~U lying ****
CybaSista420~I whip out my hulking cock and blast you with my hot sticky jizz!
AussieDave37~**** you fag
AussieDave37 has left private room

heatherwantsu69 has entered room
AussieDave37 has entered private room
AussieDave37~Hi.
Heatherwantsu69~hey big boy, you like big girls?
AussieDave37~yeah, got a pic?
heatherwantsu69 sent 42390943222.jpg
AussieDave37~Pretty. Is this really you?
heatherwantsu69~of course silly u want to touch me?
AussieDave37~I slowly begin to run my hands down your chest
heatherwantsu69~I whip out my hulking cock and blast you with my hot sticky jizz!
AussieDave37~ WTF is your problem
AussieDave37~i reported you
AussieDave37 has left private room

Oh well, post your own if u like.
 

Lost Fragment

Obsessed with 4chan
emomoonbase thread

attentionwhore3of2.jpg


But I still lol'd :lol
 

thetrin

Hail, peons, for I have come as ambassador from the great and bountiful Blueberry Butt Explosion
:lol :lol :lol

That last log was ****ing classic.
 

epik

Member
Omg I remember bash.org from so LONG ago.. by far the best.

IRC -

<anamexis> oh man
<anamexis> I was opening a coke, right
--> Beefpile (~mbeefpile@cloaked.wi.rr.com) has joined #themacmind
<anamexis> and it exploded
<anamexis> ALMOST all over my keyboard
<anamexis> but I got it away just in time
<-- Beefpile has quit (sick ****ers)
<anamexis> :<


IRC -

<mage> what should I give sister for unzipping?
<Kevyn> Um. Ten bucks?
<mage> no I mean like, WinZip?
 

thetrin

Hail, peons, for I have come as ambassador from the great and bountiful Blueberry Butt Explosion
Lost Fragment said:
bash.org was funny before I started thinking 90% of the quotes were fake

Most things like Bash and Gameslink quotes aren`t fake, but being on those servers I can tell you: people certainly tried their hardest to get quoted.
 

GreekWolf

Member
Some of those are hysterical

<T-Wolf> man, my girlfriend left me for some faggot named robert
<RdAwG20> you don't live in Hope mills do you?
<T-Wolf> ya, why man?
<RdAwG20> lol, just wondering, was her namne alisson?
<T-Wolf> you mother ****er
:lol :lol


Rabidplaybunny87: Okay, so my neighbors officially hate me
GarbageStan23: why?
Rabidplaybunny87: Well, me, david and andrew were having a bonfire in the backyard, and we were making s'mores and all... and suddenly we here sirens, and see a firetruck turn into the street in front of us.
Rabidplaybunny87: So we all went running to see what was up, and our neigbor's house was on fire!
GarbageStan23: oh shit!
Rabidplaybunny87: Yeah, and when we got there, the wife was crying into her husbands arms, and we were just kinda standing there, and then she saw us, and then like for 10 seconds, gave us the dirtiest look ever
Rabidplaybunny87: Turns out, we were still holding our sticks with marshmallows on it, watching the fire....
Rabidplaybunny87: talk about bad timing...


<Thero> WHAT THE ****
<Thero> i just got yelled at for eating ham
<Thero> WHY ARE MY PARENTS PISSED ABOUT ME EATING HAM
<Thero> i didn't eat the ham to begin with
<Neon-azi> did you eat it on a plane?
<Thero> no?
<Neon-azi> did you eat it on a train?
<Thero> ....
<|silicon> did you eat it on a bar?
<wind> did you eat it in a car?
<hydro> did you eat it in a box?
<hydro> OR WITH A FOX?

Silent4042: What's another name for child molestation?
SocialistNinja: Divine intervention?
Silent4042: What?
SocialistNinja: That's what my priest tells me.

<Vile-> i need to take a shit
<Vile-> im going to go in my cats litter box
<Vile-> and my mom will go up stairs
<Vile-> and see a huge long shit in the litter box
<Vile-> and be like wtf
 

Macam

Banned
<sd> I was once trying to explain to an exec why his account would never be absolutely secure.
<sd> Me: "If somebody wants your account information badly enough, he's going to get it. He doesn't have to hack the system, he can just get it from you."
<sd> Exec: "That's crazy, I'd never give anyone my password."
<sd> Me: "Imagine you come home and find someone's broken in. He's got a gun to your daughter's head, and he tells you he's going to shoot in ten seconds if you don't give him your password. What would you do?"
<sd> Exec: [long pause] ... Which daughter?
<sd> To this day I still don't know if he was joking. But I no longer use that example.

:)
 

Lobster

Banned
CybaSista420 has entered private room
AussieDave37 has entered private room
AussieDave37~asl?
CybaSista420~ F/20/ LA you?
AussieDave37~ M/29/ dallas
CybaSista420~ not from australia
AussieDave37~ Ha, no, I wish though.
CybaSista420~U lying ****
CybaSista420~I whip out my hulking cock and blast you with my hot sticky jizz!
AussieDave37~**** you fag
AussieDave37 has left private room

:lol :lol DA BEST:lol :lol
 

Jason

Member
classic

#6697 +(242)- [X]

<Tre`> I've got to find away to earn some dough
<bishoptl> sell some sperm. that's legal in the States, isn't it?
<bishoptl> or plasma - that should free up some $$$
<SHD> he's too young for selling sperm
<Tre`> I need *a bunch*
<bishoptl> sell your friends' sperm
<Tre`> that's just disgusting
<bishoptl> how badly do you want NWN
<bishoptl> I'm not saying you have to go milk them yourself
<bishoptl> just pass around the tupperware container
 

whytemyke

Honorary Canadian.
it's not what you're saying, but that you go to such extensive lengths to make one guy your bitch :lol :lol :lol
 

Meier

Member
I'd totally forgot about bash.org -- endless entertainment there. Bloodninja's cyber logs will never be topped although this was a valiant effort.

Haha, this is a relatively new entry to me:
<Cthon98> hey, if you type in your pw, it will show as stars
<Cthon98> ********* see!
<AzureDiamond> hunter2
<AzureDiamond> doesnt look like stars to me
<Cthon98> <AzureDiamond> *******
<Cthon98> thats what I see
<AzureDiamond> oh, really?
<Cthon98> Absolutely
<AzureDiamond> you can go hunter2 my hunter2-ing hunter2
<AzureDiamond> haha, does that look funny to you?
<Cthon98> lol, yes. See, when YOU type hunter2, it shows to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> thats neat, I didnt know IRC did that
<Cthon98> yep, no matter how many times you type hunter2, it will show to us as *******
<AzureDiamond> awesome!
<AzureDiamond> wait, how do you know my pw?
<Cthon98> er, I just copy pasted YOUR ******'s and it appears to YOU as hunter2 cause its your pw
<AzureDiamond> oh, ok.
****ing perfect.
 

skybaby

Member
I once had a job... Where I did nothing all day but read bash.org. I read ALL quotes (seriously). I remember reading most of the ones posted here :lol
 

Meier

Member
Jonm1010 said:
where can i find more of those bloodninja cyber logs or are the ones posted all there are?

http://en.wikiquote.org/wiki/Bloodninja

bloodninja: Ok baby, we got to hurry, I don't know how long I can keep it ready for you.
j_gurli3: thats ok. ok i'm a japanese schoolgirl, what r u.
bloodninja: A Rhinocerus. Well, hung like one, thats for sure.
j_gurli3: haha, ok lets go.
j_gurli3: i put my hand through ur hair, and kiss u on the neck.
bloodninja: I stomp the ground, and snort, to alert you that you are in my breeding territory.
j_gurli3: haha, ok, u know that turns me on.
j_gurli3: i start unbuttoning ur shirt.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't wear shirts.
j_gurli3: No, ur not really a Rhinocerus silly, it's just part of the game.
bloodninja: Rhinoceruses don't play games. They ****ing charge your ass.
j_gurli3: stop, cmon be serious.
bloodninja: It doesn't get any more serious than a Rhinocerus about to charge your ass.

bloodninja: I stomp my feet, the dust stirs around my tough skinned feet.
j_gurli3: thats it.
bloodninja: Nostrils flaring, I lower my head. My horn, like some phallic symbol of my potent virility, is the last thing you see as skulls collide and mine remains the victor. You are now a bloody red ragdoll suspended in the air on my mighty horn.
bloodninja: Goddam am I hard now.

:lol :lol I think that's my all time favorite of his.. so ridiculous.
 

GilloD

Banned
I'll have to see if I still have the log, but many moons ago I managed to get some fellow to cyber-dress up like an SS officer and shout "Seig Heil!" while I delivered an e-handjob. The shocking conclusion was when his Nazi fantasy babe turned out to be Anne Frank, although he didn't know who Anne Frank was and the whole thing fell apart.
 

Meier

Member
Jdogg:Hey
QT-Pie:Hey
Jdogg:whats goin on
QT-Pie:Nothing. Who are you?
Jdogg:Jdogg. Wanna cyber?
QT-Pie:what does that mean?
Jdogg:what are you wearing?
QT-Pie:T-shirt. Jeans.
Jdogg:Garter belt?
QT-Pie:Ummm...no.
Jdogg:Are we gonna cyber or not?
QT-Pie: uh, okay.
Jdogg:Sweet, I start by rubbing your ass all around. You love this.
Jdogg: You're wet already. I can smell your pussy stink from here.
QT-Pie: WHAT?!
Jdogg: I execute standing position 12 from the Kama Sutra. Passion fills the room. Your head is close to the ceiling fan.
Jdogg:You leave everything to jdogg.
Jdogg:I am completely inside of you. You are my dick puppet. I put on a little play.
QT-Pie:This is weird. I should go.
Jdogg: I drop you on the ground, and lay a stripe down your back.
QT-Pie: A stripe?
Jdogg: I need a sandwich.
QT-Pie: You're a freak.
Jdogg: I was great. You loved it.

This one has me almost in tears at work. Good thing it's the end. Seriously, the bloodninja logs *never* get old. :lol :lol :lol :lol
 

LordMaji

Member
Cornballer said:
Oh man. Some quality stuff there... :lol

Agreed

This one is great.

Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
MommyMelissa: Sure, you into vegetables?
Bloodninja: What like gardening an ****?
MommyMelissa: Yeah, something like that.
Bloodninja: Nuthin turns me on more, check this out
Bloodninja: You bend over to harvest your radishes.

(pause)

MommyMelissa: is that it?
Bloodninja: You water your tomato patch.
Bloodninja: Are you ready for my fresh produce?
MommyMelissa: I was thinking of like, sexual acts INVOLVING vegetables... Can you make it a little more sexy for me?

(pause)

Bloodninja: I touch you on your lettuce, you massage my spinach... Sexily.
Bloodninja: I ride your buttocks, like they were amber waves of grains.
MommyMelissa: Grain doesn't really turn me on... I was thinking more along the lines of carrots and zucchinis.
Bloodninja: my zucchinis carresses your carrots.
Bloodninja: Damn baby your right, this s**t is HOT.
MommyMelissa: ...
Bloodninja: My turnips listen for the soft cry of your love. My insides turn to celery as I unleash my warm and sticky cauliflower of love.
MommyMelissa: What the f**k is this madlibs? I'm outta here.
Bloodninja: Yah, well I already unleashed my cauliflower, all over your olives, and up in your eyes. Now you can't see. Bitch.
MommyMelissa: whatever.

:lol
 

Vic

Please help me with my bad english
You can't hurry good pizza

Bloodninja: Wanna cyber?
DirtyKate: OK, but don't tell anybody ;-)
DirtyKate: Who are you?
Bloodninja: I've got blond hair, blue eyes, I work out a lot
Bloodninja:And I have a part time job delivering for Papa John's in my Geo Storm.
DirtyKate: You sound sexy.. I bet you want me in the back of your car..
Bloodninja: Maybe some other time. You should call up Papa John's and make an order
DirtyKate: Haha! OK
DirtyKate: Hello! I'd like an extra-EXTRA large pizza just dripping with sauce.
Bloodninja: Well, first they would say, "Hello, this is Papa John's, how may I help you", then they tell you the specials, and then you would make your order. So that's an X-Large. What toppings do you want?
DirtyKate: I want everything, baby!
Bloodninja: Is this a delivery?
DirtyKate: Umm...Yes
DirtyKate: So you're bringing the pizza to my house now? Cause I'm home alone... and I think I'll take a shower...
Bloodninja: Good. It will take about fifteen minutes to cook, and then I'll drive to your house.

(pause)

DirtyKate: I'm almost finished with my shower... Hurry up!
Bloodninja: You can't hurry good pizza.
Bloodninja: I'm on my way now though

(pause)

DirtyKate: So you're at my front door now.
Bloodninja: How did you know?
Bloodninja: I knock but you can't hear me cause you're in the shower. So I let myself in, and walk inside. I put the pizza down on your coffee table.
Bloodninja: Are you ready to get nasty, baby? I'm as hot as a pizza oven
DirtyKate: Oooohh yeah. I step out of the shower and I'm all wet and cold. Warm me up baby
Bloodninja: So you're still in the bathroom?
DirtyKate: Yeah, I'm wrapping a towel around myself.
Bloodninja: I can no longer resist the pizza. I open the box and unzip my pants with my other hand. As I penetrate the gooey cheese, I moan in ecstacy. The mushrooms and Italian sausage are rough, but the sauce is deliciously soothing. I blow my load in seconds. As you leave the bathroom, I exit through the front door....
DirtyKate: What the f**k?
DirtyKate: You perverted piece of s**t
DirtyKate: F**k

Hahaahahaha
 
J-Dogg: I see you in line at the supermarket. Our eyes meet.
Partner8: Who the **** are you?
J-Dogg: I mouth the words to you, as if in slow motion:
J-Dogg: **** me, **** me.
J-Dogg: My wishes are like poetry in your eyes. We want this moment to last forever.
Partner8: OMFG are you trying to cyber me?
J-Dogg: We are like two dancers, for whom the music never stops. I Kiss the top of your hand. You are taken aback by the bulge that forms in your thigh.
Partner8: Is that like cancer?
J-Dogg: If cancer is our love, then I hope you don't have the technology of chemotherapy.
Partner8: Good one romeo.
J-Dogg: You grab the bulge that you feel. you tihink it must be taking over your mind, theres nothing else you can think of. My tubesteak to you is like a beautiful japanese haiku.
The salmon swim at night.
Towards your room.
The snow and the moon.
Partner8: that was never a haiku.
J-Dogg: To your light bulb I am the Thomas Edison of your sex. Withought my light you would be lost in a sea of darkness.
Partner8: That made even less sense than your "haiku"
J-Dogg: So you ready to **** then?
Partner8: You unbutton my pants, spew your load at the sight of my underwear, and your spent.
J-Dogg: ...
Partner8: ?
J-Dogg: I'm spent.

:lol
 
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