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My Brother's Last Wish: To Leave a $500 Tip...For Pizza

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Seth C

Member
Edit:

I wanted to edit this first post because many people (including many not from NeoGAF) are now finding their way to this thread. The cause of Aaron's death is currently under investigation by law enforcement. I originally posted this thread based strictly on the story I received which was based on the word of one person, and that report's legitimacy has since been called in to question. Aaron did not appear to be depressed or suicidal, even earlier that day. He did not leave a note or any indication that intended to end his life. Simply put, we don't have any idea how or why his life ended. The will was written years earlier.



Im back in the hospital. It's not been a good two weeks. My sister woke me up at 5am. Apparently he and his girlfriend had a fight, she left, and when she came back he was unconscious hanging from a noose. He is in a coma on a breathing machine. I don't even know what to think. I'm sad and want to see my brother, but also unsympathetic. His family loves him. We would give him any help he needs. I just don't know.
 

double jump

you haven't lived until a random little kid ask you "how do you make love".
dude sorry to hear that. I hope he pulls threw then gets the help he needs.
 

Mush

6.0
Suicide is a coward's move, yes. But he's still your own flesh and blood; be grateful he is still alive.
 

Pie and Beans

Look for me on the local news, I'll be the guy arrested for trying to burn down a Nintendo exec's house.
Feel really awkward for the girlfriend.
 
suicide is a dick move.

Its easy to say that, but if someone is in a position where they feel like there life is irreparable and not worth living, they are hardly doing it out of spite or whatever.

That being said, some people make attempts for attention, but I don't think that is the case hear.
 

fanboi

Banned
suicide is a dick move.

I agree. It's an awful thing to put your friends and loved ones through.

That being said, I'm really sorry to hear about this. Hope he pulls through.

So if he don't want to live anymore he should suffer 50-60 years just because his friends and family?

If that isn't a dick standpoint I don't know what.
 

TheContact

Member
Wow, love can hurt but hanging yourself over it...sounds like he had some issues. Sucks that he's in a coma too, death might be a better option at this point. That really sucks man I feel for you. How old was he?
 

DrBo42

Member
So sorry man. I hope he pulls through. I know you're angry that he would even think of putting everyone through that but he needs you.
 
There are a lot of people who seem to think it is a coward move, but have any of you been in a position where you have suffered from severe depression.
 
D

Deleted member 102362

Unconfirmed Member
So if he don't want to live anymore he should suffer 50-60 years just because his friends and family?

If that isn't a dick standpoint I don't know what.
Perhaps we could avoid turning this into a right-to-die thread?

OP, I am sorry to hear about this. As others have already stated, I hope he recovers and gets the help he needs.
 
I was unsure whether to comment, but I'll go ahead anyway. I can't imagine what you're family is going through at this time, and whilst I can understand you're angry, I thought it was pretty disgusting for you to include the 'unsympathetic' comment in that OP whilst he is in a coma breathing through a machine.

I sincerely hope he recovers and he gets all the support and love of those around him. Keep us up-to-date if you can
 

Seth C

Member
Unsympathetic?

Yes. I love him, but I'm angry at him. It wasn't an accident. If it were I wouldn't have these conflicted emotions. He did one of the most selfish things a person can do. My mother is a disaster. He may end up brain damaged. All because he had a fight with his girlfriend of several months? He isn't a child. He is a 30 year old man.
 

Pie and Beans

Look for me on the local news, I'll be the guy arrested for trying to burn down a Nintendo exec's house.
So if he don't want to live anymore he should suffer 50-60 years just because his friends and family?

If that isn't a dick standpoint I don't know what.

You'd have to be crazy short-sighted to think nothing can get better than that specific low point with 50-60 years left on the clock. And thats the trick to it really, talking to people about depression and whatever rather than just doing this out of the blue without even communicating to anyone. Pride issues or whatever, hanging yourself also requires someone else to cut you down and the nightmare of having to do that will stain that person's life forever. So yeah, while this is a tragedy, it really is the girlfriend I feel the most pity for in this. She can't just break off now and run, has to stick around to make sure everythings okay, but for how long?
 

Yagharek

Member
There are a lot of people who seem to think it is a coward move, but have any of you been in a position where you have suffered from severe depression.

Or total despair. Not surprising given the OP says it was after an argument with his partner.

I hope he is ok and recovers quickly. Take care Seth, and try not to blame him.
 

JGS

Banned
So if he don't want to live anymore he should suffer 50-60 years just because his friends and family?

If that isn't a dick standpoint I don't know what.
he wouldn't be suffering that long and the one who alters the lives of those around them has made the more selfish move than the ones wanting him to stay alive.

Its kind of tacky to discuss while OP is still dealing with it so I'm out on that especially since all circumstances are different.
 

fanboi

Banned
You'd have to be crazy short-sighted to think nothing can get better than that specific low point with 50-60 years left on the clock. And thats the trick to it really, talking to people about depression and whatever rather than just doing this out of the blue without even communicating to anyone. Pride issues or whatever, hanging yourself also requires someone else to cut you down and the nightmare of doing so that will stain that person's life forever.

As a prev. person stated, let us not turn this into a debate that we will never agree on.
 

Seth C

Member
You'd have to be crazy short-sighted to think nothing can get better than that specific low point with 50-60 years left on the clock. And thats the trick to it really, talking to people about depression and whatever rather than just doing this out of the blue without even communicating to anyone. Pride issues or whatever, hanging yourself also requires someone else to cut you down and the nightmare of having to do that will stain that person's life forever. So yeah, while this is a tragedy, it really is the girlfriend I feel the most pity for in this. She can't just break off now and run, has to stick around to make sure everythings okay, but for how long?

No, apparently she doesn't. She bailed and went home. She hasn't called. She hasn't come to the hospital. That is the person he did this over.

And if unsympathetic was the wrong word, I apologize. I AM sympathetic for the condition he clearly must have been in to do this. I am. I wish he had come to me, called, anything. I don't blame him that he didn't. I hope for the best case. That he pulls through. That he recovers. But he has destroyed our mother. She is blaming herself. She is sobbing. For a girl who didn't care enough to follow him to the hospital.
 

fanboi

Banned
No, apparently she doesn't. She bailed and went home. She hasn't called. She hasn't come to the hospital. That is the person he did this over.

Shocked? Or just plain cold blooded?

Damn... harsh.

Any idea what they where fighting over?
 
Or total despair. Not surprising given the OP says it was after an argument with his partner.

I hope he is ok and recovers quickly. Take care Seth, and try not to blame him.

Yeah but the break up could have been the straw, he may have been depressed before that. It is no easy thing suffering from depression, especially when your family don't know about it.
 

Pie and Beans

Look for me on the local news, I'll be the guy arrested for trying to burn down a Nintendo exec's house.
No, apparently she doesn't. She bailed and went home. She hasn't called. She hasn't come to the hospital. That is the person he did this over.

Harsh. Was she the one that got him down and brought him in initially though? I mean, no judging, but that is some horrific shit. Even daring to see you and your family over this would be a really big ordeal.
 
There are a lot of people who seem to think it is a coward move, but have any of you been in a position where you have suffered from severe depression.

Yes, and you get yourself out of the hole, not go deeper. I don't want to sound like a robot, but depression is almost a problem-solving exercise and can always be rectified.

OP, best of luck that he gets his head right about all this, and comes out a better person.
 

DrBo42

Member
Yes. I love him, but I'm angry at him. It wasn't an accident. If it were I wouldn't have these conflicted emotions. He did one of the most selfish things a person can do. My mother is a disaster. He may end up brain damaged. All because he had a fight with his girlfriend of several months? He isn't a child. He is a 30 year old man.

You could lose this person at any moment. God forbid that happened, do you really want to remember acting this way while he was in the hospital? Yeah it was an awful choice on his part but you need to move past that for now man.
 
Yes. I love him, but I'm angry at him. It wasn't an accident. If it were I wouldn't have these conflicted emotions. He did one of the most selfish things a person can do. My mother is a disaster. He may end up brain damaged. All because he had a fight with his girlfriend of several months? He isn't a child. He is a 30 year old man.

Fair points, I don't know the situation.
 
So if he don't want to live anymore he should suffer 50-60 years just because his friends and family?

If that isn't a dick standpoint I don't know what.
It's like breaking up with someone, I guess. There is no nice way to dump your girlfriend or commit suicide when you have a family.

My condolences to the OP and his family. Give your bro a real nice talking to if he wakes up. He definitely needs attention if he was willing to go so far over a fight.
 

EatChildren

Currently polling second in Australia's federal election (first in the Gold Coast), this feral may one day be your Bogan King.
I've dealt with my sister's clinical depression and attempted overdoses to know how you feel, op. Hang in there.

Yes. I love him, but I'm angry at him. It wasn't an accident. If it were I wouldn't have these conflicted emotions. He did one of the most selfish things a person can do. My mother is a disaster. He may end up brain damaged. All because he had a fight with his girlfriend of several months? He isn't a child. He is a 30 year old man.

I assure you he had more going through his mind than simply breaking up with his girlfriend for him to decide on suicide.

So yeah, while this is a tragedy, it really is the girlfriend I feel the most pity for in this. She can't just break off now and run, has to stick around to make sure everythings okay, but for how long?

In cases like this, staying with someone clinically depressed is a disastrous, destructive move. It deludes the person who is mentally ill into believing in a fantasy reality where nothing is wrong with the relationship, and it forces the other person to endure hell and guilt of dealing with this person.

It's easy to rattle off worst case scenarios, but if you need to break up with someone like this you should.
 
Yes, and you get yourself out of the hole, not go deeper. I don't want to sound like a robot, but depression is almost a problem-solving exercise and can always be rectified.

OP, best of luck that he gets his head right about all this, and comes out a better person.

Yeah I know, but surely you can imagine what it must be like, if you were in a really low place and then you break up with your girlfriend, it would seem like there is no way back up.

I get depressive mood swings, so when it happens to me it doesn't have a reason to occur, I have a nice life etc, makes recognising ways to improve it, quite hard. Who knows what position his brother was in, just need to hope he's okay and gets the help he need.
 

taku

Member
Okay people, enough with the judging already. Seth C is entitled to his feelings..

Do you guys understand how tough it is to experience this first hand? Of course you are entitled to feel anger, even though the situation has many variables to it, like biochemical markers and so forth. Suicide is a fucked up thing to go through with, both for the individual in question as well as everyone around him or her.

Best of luck to you, your brother and your family, Seth.
 

Seth C

Member
Harsh. Was she the one that got him down and brought him in initially though? I mean, no judging, but that is some horrific shit. Even daring to see you and your family over this would be a really big ordeal.

Apparently her friend found him and cut him down? I don't know. They called the police, who brought an ambulance and transported him to the hospital. She didn't come. She left, and left the police to contact his family. He left him alone, dead. Which he was. His heart wasn't beating. They had to revive him.

And the anger isn't for me. I love him. I need him to come back. The anger is because he has made my mother, father, and sisters suffer in ways they never have before. So there is a conflicting emotion, to feel anger at someone who did that to people you love. I guess? I've had an hour of sleep and woke up with a call from my sister telling me our brother had hanged himself and was in critical condition. I'm lost.
 
A good friend of mine also committed suicide after his girlfriend, with whom me he had raised a child for 5 years, broke off their engagement. He called her into their bedroom and told her 'you did this ' and shot himself in the head.

It may be the wrong way to handle something, but you need to have empathy for your brother even without condoning his action. Hope he pulls through and finds help despite his rash and desperate act.
 

Pie and Beans

Look for me on the local news, I'll be the guy arrested for trying to burn down a Nintendo exec's house.
Apparently her friend found him and cut him down? I don't know. They called the police, who brought an ambulance and transported him to the hospital. She didn't come. She left, and left the police to contact his family. He left him alone, dead. Which he was. His heart wasn't beating. They had to revive him.

Wow that is some cold shit. Hope you get your mum back on track most of all anyway. Heart-breaking stuff that she's playing the blame game with herself, parental instinct can be hella cruel I guess.
 

big_z

Member
suicide is a dick move.

not really. if someones life is destroyed due to some unfixable condition like living in pain 24/7 then it's fine. killing yourself over something like your parents taking your video games or a girl dumping you is pathetic.
 

Log4Girlz

Member
not really. if someones life is destroyed due to some unfixable condition like living in pain 24/7 then it's fine. killing yourself over something like your parents taking your video games or a girl dumping you is pathetic.

No, I think its sad. Most people have a very strong will to live, so killing yourself over something trivial indicates some kind of mental illness.
 

smurfx

get some go again
Apparently her friend found him and cut him down? I don't know. They called the police, who brought an ambulance and transported him to the hospital. She didn't come. She left, and left the police to contact his family. He left him alone, dead. Which he was. His heart wasn't beating. They had to revive him.

And the anger isn't for me. I love him. I need him to come back. The anger is because he has made my mother, father, and sisters suffer in ways they never have before. So there is a conflicting emotion, to feel anger at someone who did that to people you love. I guess? I've had an hour of sleep and woke up with a call from my sister telling me our brother had hanged himself and was in critical condition. I'm lost.
do they know how long his heart was stopped for?
 
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