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10 Pranks That Will Spice Up Your Relationship Courtesy of Fox News

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Oh thanks for gluing this quarter to our floor, wife! How hilarious! Let's fuck while we think about how we are going to afford to pay to have our floor refinished and still make our mortgage payment.
 
I'd be so disappointed in my wife if she did any of these pranks... I'd want the love of my life to be far more imaginative when it comes to pranking me.
 

sk3

Banned
I don't even...

It's like it was written by someone that thinks they are much smarter than they really are. Teehee dumb husband.

"Glass hammer"? Really? What kind of fucking idiot would think that exists?
 

Salazar

Member
This shit is hilarious. If there was a competition for Extreme Milquetoasting Amber Milt would be the fucking champ.

amber-headshot-1600x113yvr.jpg

Horrifying, what lurks beneath.
 

S.Dedalus

Member
Does this work with other garbage like banana peels and Cheetos bags?

The thing you must do with Cheetos bags is as follows:

1. Eat the Cheetos somewhere your wife can't see.
2. Fill the empty bag with your ejaculate. Like, really full.
3. Reseal the bag. Tape, staple, something.
4. Wait until your wife is hungry for a late nite snack.
5. Offer her the semenCheetos bag.
6. Watch and laugh as she shoves a fistfull of your cum into her mouth.
7. ????
8. SEX.
 

GK86

Homeland Security Fail
Somewhere, in middle America, there is a Christian family that finds this funny/awesome.
 
The old sticker-on-the-back routine of the "Kick Me" variety is not very clever, and it’s certainly not nice — but it is pretty funny. Try “Hug Me” instead, and wait for him to come home and tell you about his bizarre office encounters.

None of these "pranks" are clever.

I hope the person who wrote this is middle-aged or a senior citizen. I don't see how anyone in their 20's or 30's could find any of this funny.
 

nyong

Banned
Top 10 pranks for guys:

1) When she goes to weigh herself, put your toe on the scale and gently add 10 pounds. Give her a raised eyebrow when she looks around bewildered. Just when the tears start flowing, don't forget to give her a big kiss and let her know it was just a prank!

2) When she comes home at night to a dark house, hide around the corner next to the light switch. When she reaches to turn it on, grab her hand!

3) Replace the money in her purse with monopoly dollars. Make sure there is money on the debit card so she isn't stranded!

4) Move the seat in her car to an awkward and uncomfortable position. Also set the mirrors in different directions. Be sure to be there when she discovers the problem so you both can laugh and laugh!

5) Record her tinkling in the bathroom and change her voicemail greeting!

6) Change her alarm clock to go off 3 hours early! Change the other clocks in the house too! When she arrives at work 3 hours early, surprise her by taking her out to breakfast!

7) Peel off her deodorant label and switch it with Old Spice!

8) Set off the smoke alarm while she's in the shower! Nothing like being naked and having the adrenaline pumping to spice up the sex life.

9) Switch out her shampoo with Nair. When her hair falls out (because she "fell" for it, LOL) you can both laugh and she'll know what you love her because you find her attractive even when she's bald!

10) .....
 
11. When you're out shopping and notice a pretty young girl walk by, tease your wife "Bet you wish you still had legs like that, honey." To show her it's all in good fun, buy her an ice cream and have a laugh before wheeling her up the next chair ramp.
 

lunchtoast

Member
This one is for the hubbys :D

Put itching powder on the toilet paper.

Then relieve the itching with your dick.

This initiates anal and dick pleasures.
 
There are some pretty great ideas here, wow!

There was this one time when I was with my "special lady" (^_^), and we were on our way to get some fresh pizza... yum! As a little surprise, I cut the break wires in my car before we left because she gets so adorable when she is screaming in terror, hah!

Of course we were on main street on the way to the pizza shoppe, and I was going 40 instead of 45 (because I was in on my own little secret, and while I love her, I didn't want to make it too dangerous!). We were laughing while I was tickling her under the blouse, having the merriest of times.

Well then it was time for the prank! I swerved into the oncoming lane of traffic, and she shrieked in horror as I tried to slam on the breaks to no avail! I just knew there was gonna be some lovin' for me that night based on how tight she was gripping my arm as a truck rammed into the passenger door, paralyzing her from the neck down!

After several weeks in the hospital, on our first full night back home, I decided to order pizza from the shoppe we were driving to the night she was paralyzed! It brought back good memories of a funny prank, and we laughed and ate our yum-yums before I gently contorted my body into a geometrical position ripe for paralytic coitus.

This prank worked so well, I've already recommended it to several friends :) It's good to show you care in special ways!
 
There are some pretty great ideas here, wow!

There was this one time when I was with my "special lady" (^_^), and we were on our way to get some fresh pizza... yum! As a little surprise, I cut the break wires in my car before we left because she gets so adorable when she is screaming in terror, hah!

Of course we were on main street on the way to the pizza shoppe, and I was going 40 instead of 45 (because I was in on my own little secret, and while I love her, I didn't want to make it too dangerous!). We were laughing while I was tickling her under the blouse, having the merriest of times.

Well then it was time for the prank! I swerved into the oncoming lane of traffic, and she shrieked in horror as I tried to slam on the breaks to no avail! I just knew there was gonna be some lovin' for me that night based on how tight she was gripping my arm as a truck rammed into the passenger door, paralyzing her from the neck down!

After several weeks in the hospital, on our first full night back home, I decided to order pizza from the shoppe we were driving to the night she was paralyzed! It brought back good memories of a funny prank, and we laughed and ate our yum-yums before I gently contorted my body into a geometrical position ripe for paralytic coitus.

This prank worked so well, I've already recommended it to several friends :) It's good to show you care in special ways!

Here's a fun followup prank. Make sure to write "DNR" on her bracelet, and wait for her to tell you about her vain struggle to cling to life.
 
Oh that Mitt Romney! He's such a prankster!

Honestly, I can't help but feel like this is stealth pro-Romney propaganda, given all the talk about his affinity for "pranks" and how it humanizes him.


Well, their readership probably takes breaks from reading and forwarding chain emails to visit foxnews.com.

I know someone who this exactly describes.
 
I think I'd be upset if my wife pulled any of these "pranks" on me. Not because they're mean, but because they're so terrible and unfunny that it'd make me question if it's worth staying in a relationship with a person who has absolutely no sense of humor.
 

Tain

Member
3. If you're feeling silly, stuff tissues or newspaper into his shoes so that he can’t get his feet in. Write “SURPRISE!” on each one — he’ll see the message as he pulls them out.

what the hell

seriously what the hell is this
 

GloveSlap

Member
1. Get your son to call up and pretend to be "coming out"
2. On election day, come home with a "I voted for Obama" sticker
3. Replace the inside of his Bible with the inside of 'On the Origin of Species'
 

Aesius

Member
I could feel the life draining out of me as I read this.

#9 and #10 are just unbelievably stupid. What kind of sheltered, fucked up worldview causes a person to think any of those are even remotely funny or amusing?
 
2. This is one of our favorites and it can translate into a number of situations. Ask your guy to go to the supermarket and give him a list of made up things like dehydrated water, sweet salt or a blunt knife. If he’s into fixing things, send him to the hardware store for a glass hammer or cement humidifier. For the sports guy, tell him to grab a box of curveballs and meet you in the park after work. Beware though, this could keep him tied up for a while.

I feel stupider having read this.
 
2. This is one of our favorites and it can translate into a number of situations. Ask your guy to go to the supermarket and give him a list of made up things like dehydrated water, sweet salt or a blunt knife. If he’s into fixing things, send him to the hardware store for a glass hammer or cement humidifier. For the sports guy, tell him to grab a box of curveballs and meet you in the park after work. Beware though, this could keep him tied up for a while.

Her husband must be the dumbest fucking human in the history of mankind
 
2. This is one of our favorites and it can translate into a number of situations. Ask your guy to go to the supermarket and give him a list of made up things like dehydrated water, sweet salt or a blunt knife. If he’s into fixing things, send him to the hardware store for a glass hammer or cement humidifier. For the sports guy, tell him to grab a box of curveballs and meet you in the park after work. Beware though, this could keep him tied up for a while.
Hey guess what, your husband isn't tied up because of your stupid joke, he's using it as an excuse to get out of the house for an hour and fuck someone who isn't a goddamn moron.
 

Slavik81

Member
I don't even...

It's like it was written by someone that thinks they are much smarter than they really are. Teehee dumb husband.

"Glass hammer"? Really? What kind of fucking idiot would think that exists?
Glass breaking tools are occasionally called glass hammers. He might actually come back with a real product!
 
R

Retro_

Unconfirmed Member
11. When you're out shopping and notice a pretty young girl walk by, tease your wife "Bet you wish you still had legs like that, honey." To show her it's all in good fun, buy her an ice cream and have a laugh before wheeling her up the next chair ramp.

Thanks for making me laugh like a madman at 2 in the morning
 

akira28

Member
This shit is hilarious. If there was a competition for Extreme Milquetoasting Amber Milt would be the fucking champ.

yes. Then she'll call her Dear Hubby "sugarbear", and ask him to come cuddle while they watch Crook and Chase.
 

RiZ III

Member
This is so stupid that it's seriously making me laugh. These are pranks of see on leave it to beaver or something. Hahaha I made a pillow fall on you! ...riiiight


Edit: reading these comments is making me laugh so hard I can't breathe
 
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