[ClovingWestbrook]

Don't start that shit again, please. Great, now I'm dealing with a rape victim as well. Not her fault obviously. Thoughts? I'm not looking for a relationship and I've never met her.

What do you mean you're 'dealing with'?

If you are not looking for a relationship with her and don't know her, and don't seem you want to be dealing with her, why are you?

[bluemax]

Elaborate please. I don't have money or time to visit a therapist, not that I take that suggestion seriously.

You're a self absorbed asshole (among other things) and if you can't see that for yourself then I suggest serious professional help. You need to take care of your issues before you enter into a relationship with another human being.

[Minamu]

What do you mean you're 'dealing with'? If you are not looking for a relationship with her and don't know her, and don't seem you want to be dealing with her, why are you?

That's a fair question I suppose. I'm not *looking* for a relationship with anyone, if it happens it happens, but school is my top priority. We've been chatting and texting for a couple of weeks and she told me this tonight. I'm not gonna stop talking to her because of it, as it's been very enjoyable so far. Of course, I wouldn't have minded hooking up, but now I'm a bit more apprehensive. Maybe it was another one of those poor choice of words of mine :)

[NeOak]

That's a fair question I suppose. I'm not *looking* for a relationship with anyone, if it happens it happens, but school is my top priority. We've been chatting and texting for a couple of weeks and she told me this tonight. I'm not gonna stop talking to her because of it, as it's been very enjoyable so far. Of course, I wouldn't have minded hooking up, but now I'm a bit more apprehensive. Maybe it was another one of those poor choice of words of mine :)

She trusts you enough to tell you that at least.

[Neki]

Man...I don't know what to say about Anastacio's situation. The ironic thing is that he was in this same situation months ago. That alone should be evidence to him that nothing will change.

How does he find all these people that treat him like shit? It was the exact same months ago.

[SlipperySlope]

Somebody's girlfriend is on a dating site... And he still wants her? Dude.... Dude!!!

[JohnDoe]

Anastacio, you really should listen to gaf this time and break up.
And after you do that work on getting some self-respect ffs!

[shanshan310]

Ask anyone on this board in a long-term healthy relationship, and there is no way the woman chats around with random guys, and even if they have male friends in the beginning, they will slowly fade away because now YOU have become their male friend and lover. Every other guy in their life just became disposable.

Five years together, probably 2/3rds of my friends are male, including all of my 'best friends'. It probably makes a difference that my partner and I are friends with a lot of the same people, but not all of them. Should she stop being friends with her female friends as well because she has you as a 'friend and lover'? What if she was bi? Not all relationships between sexes have to be romantic in nature.

[Minamu]

She trusts you enough to tell you that at least.

Yeah. She seems to be taking it surprisingly well, basically saying it wasn't that big of a deal. But she at the same time admits to having some mental issues to work through and feeling like crap after sex (though she felt that way before that happened too). She's selling herself a bit short I think. And in standard GAF fare, I tell her that looking for a boyfriend in that state isn't the greatest of ideas, which she agree with me on. Talk about opening up, but at the same time not building any attraction whatsoever :S

[OddSpoon]

My girlfriend is suicidal (she says) and "feels disgusting"

What do I do

[Seguin]

My girlfriend is suicidal (she says) and "feels disgusting" What do I do

Tell her to lose weight so she won't feel so disgusting

[OddSpoon]

Tell her to lose weight so she won't feel so disgusting

Well after all that's been said in the past two days, me finding out she cheated and lied to me

[Count Dookkake]

Tell her to go see a counselor. She earned that feeling.

It's not really your problem anymore, unless you want it to be.

[OddSpoon]

I just want her to feel better, let her know I love her and I forgive her. I keep saying this, but she's still depressed. And I figure this will last for a couple more days

[MVP]

Five years together, probably 2/3rds of my friends are male, including all of my 'best friends'. It probably makes a difference that my partner and I are friends with a lot of the same people, but not all of them. Should she stop being friends with her female friends as well because she has you as a 'friend and lover'? What if she was bi? Not all relationships between sexes have to be romantic in nature.

She doesn't need to stop being friends with her female friends because they'll go shoe shopping and talk about stuff I have no interest in, but she let go of her male friends a long time ago, and she also talks to her female friends a lot less as well. She knows they all just wanted to have sex with her, and she's not immature enough to believe any new guys she meets want to be her "friend", so she doesn't waste their time or her own time.

[Count Dookkake]

I just want her to feel better, let her know I love her and I forgive her. I keep saying this, but she's still depressed. And I figure this will last for a couple more days

She's not depressed.

She is rightfully feeling like a piece of shit.

[ConradCervantes]

She's not depressed. She is rightfully feeling like a piece of shit.

For now, at least. Martin will cure what ails her.

[JokerOfSpades]

For now, at least. Martin will cure what ails her.

Damn, I'm dying.

[OddSpoon]

She's not depressed. She is rightfully feeling like a piece of shit.

Good point

[NeOak]

I just want her to feel better, let her know I love her and I forgive her. I keep saying this, but she's still depressed. And I figure this will last for a couple more days

You, sir, are more blind than Ray Charles...

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

She's depressed that she got caught and now things are shitty instead of you still believing almost nothing happened.

She's going to be riding that other dude all she wants. You might as well let her go do that, deal with it, and come back into the dating pool strong when you're ready. I'm assuming you're young. This happens to all of us. We've all been through that feel, bro. You will come out a better man.

[Razorskin]

She's depressed that she got caught and now things are shitty instead of you still believing almost nothing happened.

There we go.

[OddSpoon]

She's depressed that she got caught and now things are shitty instead of you still believing almost nothing happened. She's going to be riding that other dude all she wants. You might as well let her go do that, deal with it, and come back into the dating pool strong when you're ready. I'm assuming you're young. This happens to all of us. We've all been through that feel, bro. You will come out a better man.

So my answer is to be cruel to her for a period of time, let her feel this way for a while

"no your answer is to dump her" which I am not doing

[Blader5489]

So my answer is to be cruel to her for a period of time, let her feel this way for a while "no your answer is to dump her" which I am not doing

You're being cruel to yourself.

She cheated on you. She doesn't respect you as a partner. There's no reason to keep being with her, and you're just hurting yourself the longer you stay.

[thekad]

Stop posting.

[grumble]

So my answer is to be cruel to her for a period of time, let her feel this way for a while "no your answer is to dump her" which I am not doing

Then you're a fool. Your 'girlfriend' is repeatedly cheating on you, will continue to do so, and clearly doesn't respect you. What will happen once she's come to terms with you, especially considering how much of a wuss it makes you look if you roll over and follow her around when she's shitting on you like this, is dump you.

There are a LOT of girls out there in the world. A lot. There's a near guarantee that regardless of who anyone in this thread is dating, there's a girl even more suited to them somewhere in the world. Why hold yourself back from finding a great girl who treats you right to stay with a lying cheating skank who'll just use you, abuse you and dump you?

Do you hate yourself?

[Count Dookkake]

So my answer is to be cruel to her for a period of time, let her feel this way for a while "no your answer is to dump her" which I am not doing

This is the behavior of a passive-aggressive turd. I hope you suffer greatly for the remainder of the relationship. Perhaps there is an STD in your future.

[JokerOfSpades]

Oh, shit.

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

So my answer is to be cruel to her for a period of time, let her feel this way for a while "no your answer is to dump her" which I am not doing

Dude, what drugs do you use? How are your critical thinking and association skills so bad? It feels like every response you give is only barely related to what is being said to you.

[TheSchwab_7]

Is it normal for your girlfriend to rarely talk about what she does with her friends? Usually I always tell her what I do, but most of the time I have no clue what shes doing.

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Is it normal for your girlfriend to rarely talk about what she does with her friends? Usually I always tell her what I do, but most of the time I have no clue what shes doing.

Potentially. I dislike talking about myself and often find it boring and don't really need anyone else to know. My girlfriend often has to coax details out of me while she's happy to talk about everything all the time.

It can be a personality thing, and it doesn't necessarily have to be bad. However, there's always the other explanation for why she might not be so talkative.

[TheSchwab_7]

Just thought its weird cause sometimes I log onto facebook and theres pictures of her hanging with her friends and she never tells me what they did etc etc. I usually never ask cause I don't want to be like I NEED TO KNOW EVERYTHING but I also dont like being in the dark

[OddSpoon]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her

The one month I was with her was the best time of my life

But I have to remember when I was hard at work getting money to see her, passport etc. she was fucking some dude

[low-G]

Don't start that shit again, please. Great, now I'm dealing with a rape victim as well. Not her fault obviously. Thoughts? I'm not looking for a relationship and I've never met her.

Considering something like 1/3rd of women have been raped, some of you are probably with women that never told anyone they were raped. My mom told me and my dad she was raped, but only once and never owned up to it again after that.

Most rape victims are literally perfectly normal acting afterwards.

[Count Dookkake]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her The one month I was with her was the best time of my life But I have to remember when I was hard at work getting money to see her, passport etc. she was fucking some dude

A starving man might settle for eating shit, but he won't last long.

[NeOak]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her The one month I was with her was the best time of my life But I have to remember when I was hard at work getting money to see her, passport etc. she was fucking some dude

You... you're like an addict at this moment. Nothing we can say will make you react.

Go on, go there and be there with a woman who has lied to you repeatedly, cheated with who knows how many and manipulated you. Reality will serve your dish cold when you realize you are won't be anything else than the backup choice.

You're her tear towel, the emotional blanket. Nothing else.

[MVP]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her The one month I was with her was the best time of my life But I have to remember when I was hard at work getting money to see her, passport etc. she was fucking some dude

Just do your thing, bro. I know too many guys like you and you're a lost cause, so you might as well see this thing all the way through. Don't break up with her, and just be there for her 100%. If she is your only source of happiness in life right now, then why get rid of it and be miserable and alone? Since right now you are too blind to let it go, I know being miserable with company is better than being miserable and alone for you, even if the company IS the source of that misery.

[Log4Girlz]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her The one month I was with her was the best time of my life But I have to remember when I was hard at work getting money to see her, passport etc. she was fucking some dude

Dude, we knew this...and she knows this. You are her rock...the rock that she has set up camp on. The guy she can rely on to always be there, because you're a tool in her eyes. From the camp she's set up she goes exploring...exploring her sexuality. She can fuck around and not have to worry about whether someone will be there the next morning or not. You are there. So unless you like getting played dude...played like a piano...dump her. Dump her or deal with it and stop posting for our advice. Just update us when it spirals out of control.

[subversus]

I still can't understand why men allow being played like that. It's the third case I saw on GAF. They all must be very young.

[Log4Girlz]

I still can't understand why men allow being played like that. It's the third case I saw on GAF. They all must be very young.

Because they do not have any respect for themselves. Plain and simple. They lay there, in the corner, in a fetal position whispering to themselves "But they wub me".

[Man]

Met chick at party last Saturday. Longer playful chat and dancing. We agreed to meet up later in the week so she gave me her full name and phone number. While at the party she tells me to add her to Facebook. Not really the smartest thing if we are going to date but I was influenced and sent her a friend request.

On Monday I call her but she doesn't pickup. She texts me that she is at the gym and I should call back later. I call a second time in the evening but she doesn't pick up.
I call Tuesday afternoon and she doesn't pick up. I leave a message that I would like to see her again and have an activity in mind. She doesn't reply and by now I assume she has backed out and I'm looking forward to another party weekend.

Today she accepts the Facebook invite. She clearly has been using Facebook in the last few days but she waited until now. Not that it changes anything as I'm going out there again this weekend but I think the signal is pretty clear in that she won't date me but at the same time she wants to be a friend (digitally friendzoned!). Another note of interest is that she is apparently married to another woman but reading some of their dialogue this seems just like som fun between friends. She also has 900+ FB friends heh.

Another weekend out trying to score date(s).

[subversus]

Because they do not have any respect for themselves. Plain and simple. They lay there, in the corner, in a fetal position whispering to themselves "But they wub me".

I think it has to do more with relationship stereotypes imposed by society. Like "every couple goes through hard times, but true love saves it all".

[Log4Girlz]

Met chick at party last Saturday. Longer playful chat and dancing. We agreed to meet up later in the week so she gave me her full name and phone number. While at the party she tells me to add her to Facebook. Not really the smartest thing if we are going to date but I was influenced and sent her a friend request. On Monday I call her but she doesn't pickup. She texts me that she is at the gym and I should call back later. I call a second time in the evening but she doesn't pick up. I call Tuesday afternoon and she doesn't pick up. I leave a message that I would like to see her again and have an activity in mind. She doesn't reply and by now I assume she has backed out and I'm looking forward to another party weekend. Today she accepts the Facebook invite. She clearly has been using Facebook in the last few days but she waited until now. Not that it changes anything as I'm going out there again this weekend but I think the signal is pretty clear in that she won't date me but at the same time she wants to be a friend (friendzoned!). Another note of interest is that she is apparently married to another woman but reading some of their dialogue this seems just like som fun between friends. She also has 900+ FB friends heh. Another weekend out trying to score date(s).

Goddamn. Well, just be friends then. But seriously, in future, I do advise only keeping to like one text or one call only. They know if you tried to contact them, if they don't respond back the first time, then the ball is in their court...stop lobbing balls at them lol.

I think it has to do more with relationship stereotypes imposed by society. Like "every couple goes through hard times, but true love saves it all".

I'll have to disagree. With everything these posters reveal, you see that they are insecure, have low self-esteem and let people walk all over them because they have to have someone in their life. I've seen quite a few girls who are the same...just let a guy walk all over them because they just have to have someone.

[Man]

I'm improving every week. This weeks patch:
- Don't send FB request even if asked before date. Reason out of it ('you should get to know me better').
- Try to limit it to one phonecall/sms even if no-one picks up on the former.

[Log4Girlz]

I'm improving every week. This weeks patch: - Don't send FB request even if asked before date. Reason out of it ('you should get to know me better'). - Try to limit it to one phonecall/sms even if no-one picks up on the former.

Though hilariously, when you said you had "Another activity in mind", she probably totally thought it was sex. Was it sex? lol

[Man]

Haha. Actually it was glow golf. Blacklight minigolf courses.
I didn't detail it as I was hoping it would spark curiosity and you know, she would ask.

I don't want a first date to be dinner and formal. I want some activity and casual clothing, to make her relax and have fun.

[Log4Girlz]

Haha. Actually it was glow golf. Blacklight minigolf courses. I didn't detail it as I was hoping it would spark curiosity and you know, she would ask. I don't want a first date to be dinner and formal. I want some activity and casual clothing, to make her relax and have fun.

That's cool. Btw, another thing...if you call once, and they tell you hey, call me back. Man to me that's the wrong answer, I already called, you should call when you're free ya know?

[zethren]

OddSpoon, don't you want to be with someone who would never even think about cheating on you? Wouldn't you rather be with someone you know you can trust totally, because now (even if you tell yourself you forgive her) you'll always have that sneaking suspicion that maybe, just maybe, she's still cheating on you. Do you want to live with that paranoia?

She wronged you, man. Wronged you in the worst way one half of a couple can be wronged by the other (outside of murder, I guess...lol). It's time to move on.

[Castor Krieg]

Would if I told you she's really the only friend I have, and the only thing I look forward to each day is going on Skype to talk with her

Ok, so you just don't want to be alone.So how about ditching the girl and finding yourself someone better?

Considering something like 1/3rd of women have been raped

Wut?

[subversus]

Wut?

according to various polls it's truth