not really they're just ads, but here's some unspooling fun:
grab your foiling hats, zero-fill your wetwares.
i know you disgusting perverts are there
just watching me jerk off to hillary duff and demi moore
when i find you i'm going to have you rape the hell out of my ass
just you wait you sons of bitches wait.
*closes blinds and walks to shower*
ya, you stupid tub. bet your wish you were a person spying on my i so icould get all in you while naked. you'd like that, sicko.
*saunters to the cat*
look at you cat, sleeping and shit like your people. but you're not. you don't want to know what i'm up to you son of a bitch. but i know what'd you do if you were a person. you'd sit there and crawl into my bed while i'm sleeping and lick your balls over my face. ya you would.
*crawls under chair*
and you chair. you'd just put your legs over my head like a real messed up pervert and rub your bottom on my scalp. yeah, let our hairs intertwine like some real messed up shit. you're disgusting chair.
*crawls out from chair*
whole damn world wants to see what i'm doing and getting sexually gross with me. ya, not happening ya vagrants.
*takes pants off*
ya sick vagrants.
*pulls undies up real high, giving self-wedgie*
disgusting sickos out there yes you are
*smears cat shit on shirt*
god i'm so normal
*flicks shirt off and raises arms high above head but still at an odd angle*
capcom we are go to engage picard burn.
*UPDATE* there's too many to stop them now, we're doomed.
there's a thread about this kind of paranoia somewhere on gaf. think it's called gang stalking, could be wrong. crazy stuff.
My aunt was legitimately paranoid fairly recently. She thought people were organizing mass stalking of her during driving, and that they could be identified by having their headlights on during the day. She told me she heard on the radio that there was a website where you could find out if anyone was talking about you, and she insisted that I showed her where she could find it, because there must have been people talking about her because they were all following her because they had had headlights on during the day.
*edit* holy cow vidcons, you're the master.