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Silicon Valley’s $400 Juicer May Be Feeling the Squeeze

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F

Frankfurter

Member
ReAxion said:
http://theconcourse.deadspin.com/i-just-love-this-juicero-story-so-much-1794459898

KuGsj.gif
Click to expand...

I can't believe how complicated the product is. It's the absolute opposite of sth. that is supposed (or is it not?) to make your life simpler. You need to connect this damn thing to the internet - for whatever reason -, it needs an app, it reads QR codes (for whatever reason), it need a smartphone for sth. (not entirely sure what it actually is) and it takes minutes to get all the juice out of these bags.

Are we sure this product is real?
 
Chittagong

Chittagong

Gold Member
This has to be viral marketing for Silicon Valley s4:

http://fortune.com/2016/10/05/phrases-vcs-want-to-hear/

2. “Here’s why my company’s product or service is personally important to me.” We asked this question to Doug Evans, founder of the innovative juice company Juicero and he said, “If you cut me, I bleed juice. It’s all I know. It’s all I ever want to do.” We’re investing in you just as much as we’re investing in your business model.
Click to expand...
 
I

Intheflorsh

Banned
Everything about this is hilarious, from the price to the arrogance of including DRM. This is a genius parody of SV bullshit, but real.
 
S

studyguy

Member
This juicer cost more than the PS3 fat when it first launched and only recently became $400. Sounds about as effective as using a PS3 fat to smash fruit.

Really who marketed this shit?
 
A

Ahasverus

Member
FantasticMrFoxdie said:
Work even gave us a free box of juices packets, but because you have to pay for a subscription even if you already have juice packets, you can't use it.
Click to expand...
326.gif


We truly live in Well's 1984.
Chittagong said:
As a VC, I can tell you how I think this deal went down

1 - a slide of how huge the Nespresso business is
2 - a slide of how huge the home juicing and juice bar businesses are
3 - a slide with a glossy pic of a device and juice pack that is sexy af
4 - a slide with a team who all have shit hot CVs
5 - a slide with some smashing 'Unit economics' - really high average purchase, low customer acquisition cost, huge lifetime value of repeat orders
6 - a slide with early test marketing traction validating that point 5 is totes accurate, it really is a sweet business
7 - a slide showing that other hot investors are already on board

Basically the cheques will almost write themselves
Click to expand...
I'm totally stealing this presentation template. I'd fall for it too!
 
A

ascii42

Member
louiedog said:
That's what cold pressed juice from the trendy places starts at. I've seen $8-$10 and I bet if I actually drank it and dug deeper there are places selling it for even more.
Click to expand...
Everyone knows they have to overpay for the product itself when they go to a bar or coffee shop or juice bar in this case. This should be cheaper.
 
blastprocessor

blastprocessor

The Amiga Brotherhood
My local Tesco have been selling cold pressed Apple juice for some time absolutely gorgeous, much cheaper than these bags and you'll get multiple glasses worth.
 
G

ghostofsparta

Member
UFO said:
Holy shit that video.

"Use the handles on the smaller box to pull it out of the larger box"
"Open your Juicero app"
"Scan the QR code"


This thing ranks with DVD rewinders as one of the dumbest inventions ever.
Click to expand...

"connect to wi-fi"

all it's missing is NFC
 
P

Phu

Banned
Kurdel said:
I think there is a cooling system that means you don't have to store to juice packs in the fridge before using them.

It's all so fucking dumb.
Click to expand...

I dunno about other people, but I tend to leave my fridge on 24/7 so it's not really an issue to just keep juice cold all the time. You're right, fucking dumb.
 
L

louiedog

Member
I just stopped by my local Whole Foods and the cold pressed juice section has changed since I last looked. There were lots of options from multiple brands in the $3-$6 range now, as well was pricier options.

This is even dumber now.
 
K

Kayhan

Member
Razorback PT said:
It doesn't make juice out of actual fruit? You need a subscription to get proprietary juice bags delivered through the mail from them? Once you get the bags you don't actually need the 400$ machine to extract the juice?

Where do I sign up?!
Click to expand...

This is the dumbest fucking idea I have seen.

No wonder Silicon Valley was all over it.
 
Q

Quixzlizx

Member
How does it feel knowing that Bay-area rents were jacked just a little bit higher because everyone on this project was being paid with phat VC stacks?
 
M

mdubs

Banned
Sell me the juicer for $99 and make the juice packs so I can make a glass of juice for a dollar or two a pop and I'd be in
 
Oppo

Oppo

Member
Chittagong said:
As a VC, I can tell you how I think this deal went down

1 - a slide of how huge the Nespresso business is
2 - a slide of how huge the home juicing and juice bar businesses are
3 - a slide with a glossy pic of a device and juice pack that is sexy af
4 - a slide with a team who all have shit hot CVs
5 - a slide with some smashing 'Unit economics' - really high average purchase, low customer acquisition cost, huge lifetime value of repeat orders
6 - a slide with early test marketing traction validating that point 5 is totes accurate, it really is a sweet business
7 - a slide showing that other hot investors are already on board

Basically the cheques will almost write themselves
Click to expand...

i believe all of this

time to rethink your life
 
andythinkpad

andythinkpad

Member
This is the silicon valley version of buying $2 crap on Aliexpress and sell it for 29.95 on kickstarter. I am not less bit surprised.
 
S

Septimius

Junior Member
Can't you just imagine the pitch? "Juice is a 520 BILLION dollar industry! With this, we'll revolutionize the market. Gone are the days where we buy movies at the store. Now we watch Netflix. We're taking the next logical step, and making juice a subscription based operation! You're guaranteed income, and even if we get just 1% of the market share, we'll be a 5.2 BILLION dollar company!
note, the 520$ billion is an estimate where we assume everything you buy is to juice. Even a new iPhone. Juice ingredient
 
K

Korey

Member
The point of a Keurig is that it's instant coffee you get from a little pod (mixed with water you provide).

This thing is like if they shipped you bottles of coffee and you used a machine to transfer it from the bottle to your cup.
 
M

MGrant

Member
I can get fresh juice, like from fruit grown in the ground less than 20 miles away, on any goddamn street in Taiwan for like a buck fifty a glass. Either these dudes are scam artists or Taiwan could quadruple their GDP overnight with some Silicon Valley-style pricing.
 
F

firehawk12

Subete no aware
Tagg9 said:
Holy shit, each juice bag only contains enough for one glass of juice?! And then you have to mail back all the discarded bags to them for recycling? This is such an amazing con.

/Edit: And the bags retail for $5-$8... https://www.juicero.com/the-packs/
Click to expand...

To be fair, that site says it's just an option:
The Pack itself (the outer layer) is recyclable at any recycling drop-off that accepts plastic bags (i.e. local grocery stores), or send them to us and we’ll recycle them for you. The Packs must be clean and dry, with the pulp removed from inside. Check here for more details. Also, the pulp inside the Packs is fully compostable or reusable.
Click to expand...

MGrant said:
I can get fresh juice, like from fruit grown in the ground less than 20 miles away, on any goddamn street in Taiwan for like a buck fifty a glass. Either these dudes are scam artists or Taiwan could quadruple their GDP overnight with some Silicon Valley-style pricing.
Click to expand...
I assume people think that cold pressed juice is better than other juicing methods?
But we live in a world where people put meat and a bag and cook it in water, so I guess why not.
 
R

Rushersauce

Banned
jrh2 said:
If I had more money to blow I could definitely see getting a product like this for the convenience of it. $400 is not that bad for a long-term investment and neither is $5-8 for juice packets. You'd pay that much (or more) at a juice bar.

You have to realize that not all products have to be for all people. There are those out there willing to put in the time and effort to make juice at home (or forgo it altogether) rather than spend money on something like this. That's fine.

This exists for a segment of the market that your typical NeoGAF user is probably not a part of. And they'll probably make a killing off of it.
Click to expand...
Yeah, stupid people with money. There are plenty of dummies with money.
 
F

fester

Banned
The Greek Freak said:
The idea of buying special bags for a juicer kills me.

The whole point of a juicer is to use produce you can get yourself.
Click to expand...

It just generates even more waste that this planet doesn't need, ala Keurig.

The whole concept from start to finish makes me sick thinking about it.
 
K

Korey

Member
jrh2 said:
If I had more money to blow I could definitely see getting a product like this for the convenience of it. $400 is not that bad for a long-term investment and neither is $5-8 for juice packets. You'd pay that much (or more) at a juice bar.

You have to realize that not all products have to be for all people. There are those out there willing to put in the time and effort to make juice at home (or forgo it altogether) rather than spend money on something like this. That's fine.

This exists for a segment of the market that your typical NeoGAF user is probably not a part of. And they'll probably make a killing off of it.
Click to expand...

Or you could just buy juice. Like in bottles. That cost the same or less and don't require a $400 machine even if you could afford it.
 
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