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I don't drive and makes me feel terrible about my self-esteem

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A

Adam_Vania

Banned
drive only if you have to. i lost my car 6 years ago and decided to make a go with public transportation. now i have a job where i can split time between taking the bus to work and work from home.

there are so many options besides just owning a car, from public transportation to zipcar to uber. plus you will be doing a lot more walking, which is infinitely more healthy for you than sitting in a car. not having a car may add years to your life.

also if you don't have a car you aren't kicking money to the insurance industry, you aren't buying pricey gasoline, you aren't supporting war for oil, you aren't supporting the pollution of the world, etc. you save money personally, and you are helping the planet.

not owning a car is awesome and makes the world a better place imo.
 
L

Liu Kang Baking A Pie

Member
Adam_Vania said:
drive only if you have to. i lost my car 6 years ago and decided to make a go with public transportation. now i have a job where i can split time between taking the bus to work and work from home.

there are so many options besides just owning a car, from public transportation to zipcar to uber. plus you will be doing a lot more walking, which is infinitely more healthy for you than sitting in a car. not having a car may add years to your life.

also if you don't have a car you aren't kicking money to the insurance industry, you aren't buying pricey gasoline, you aren't supporting war for oil, you aren't supporting the pollution of the world, etc. you save money personally, and you are helping the planet.

not owning a car is awesome and makes the world a better place imo.
Click to expand...
❤️ Ditching a car is the easiest way to personally stop supporting insurance assholes, to stop contributing so much to climate change (we produce around 18 pounds of CO2 per gallon of gas), and to stop funding horrific global wars over territory.
 
Amory

Amory

Member
Weird, since being able to drive is less important now than it was years ago. The stigma against non-drivers isn't what it used to be.

Granted I live in a city, but I'm one of the only people I know who regularly drives to get to work
 
G

gutter_trash

Banned
you aren't always going to be in an urban setting at all times with good public transit.

Learning to drive is important for life situations where you must become the driver.

I live in the city and I own a car because sometimes I need to go outside the city center without planning a bus route.


*OP, I got my license at age 28. It was liberating, especially for going out at night, road trips and dating.
 
C

Charcoal

Member
If it makes you feel any better op, getting a pilots license is much harder.

Just keep practicing when you can and you'll get there soon enough.
 
D

DeathoftheEndless

Crashing this plane... with no survivors!
Look into Driver's Education programs. That way you can at least get a permit and practice driving with someone else in the car. Driving can be scary at first, but its not really that difficult.
 
F

Famassu

Member
zoukka said:
Well basically if you are single, you can manage easy. If you have kids or a proper house outside of the city centre, things become pretty hard fast without a license.
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Even then, there's plenty of living possibilities within 5-10kms of city centers that isn't anything too impossible to handle without a car. Unlike in many places in the US, we have a lot of small grocery stores everywhere vs. having big ones people in suburbs need a car for to have a convenient enough access to. Kids' school trips, if they are long enough, get supported by the city (school taxis and/or buses). Hobbies might be a bit harder but even then there are usually plenty of access to football & ice hockey fields, swimming beaches, skiing & running tracks, youth spaces, libraries & such all around.
 
M

Mupod

Member
It was definitely worth doing for me, but I waited so long (I think I was 28) that I had a lot of anxiety around learning. I had to go to a driving school but it was 100% worth it. They taught me a lot of good habits that have saved me from accidents on multiple occasions.

I grew up in a place where public transit didn't really exist so everyone drove, and I felt like shit but I had nobody to teach me and no car to use anyways. But even after moving to the Toronto area it's been a necessity for work and helpful in all aspects of life. Seems like a little thing but it's so nice for doing groceries, I don't miss loading up a backpack and hanging bags off my bike handlebars.
 
L

llehuty

Member
26 and I don't have a license. Not a big deal for me, I don't see much my friends living in the outskirts of the city, but oh well.
 
K

keltickennedy

Member
Creepy said:
I used to drive, now I cant be bothered dealing with other drivers, so I have a chauffeur to do that for me.
Click to expand...

I don't think your parents would appreciate you calling them your chauffeur.

DeathoftheEndless said:
Look into Driver's Education programs. That way you can at least get a permit and practice driving with someone else in the car. Driving can be scary at first, but its not really that difficult.
Click to expand...

Also. a lot of times your insurance rates will be lower if you go through these programs OP.

If you don't live in a city with good transit. You really need to get your license.
 
Kite

Kite

Member
Shredderi said:
Btw, how much does getting a driver's license cost where you live? The whole shebang. Here in Finland it's something like closer to 3000e apparently. Used to be 2500e in 2013 if I recall correctly.
Click to expand...
In Texas it's around $15-25 USD depending on your age.

edit: wtf you euro have to spend thousands of dollars for your drivers licenses? lolol no wonder ya'll don't drive
 
R

Rogan

Banned
I'm 28 and I don't have a license. Walking and cycling are my main transportations right now. I don't feel bad or something, but sometimes I wish having a licence. Just for practical purposes. I'm very bad at managing money :(.

Today I applied for a upgraded job with a way better pay, so hopefully I can save more and get this licence. Its about 1100 euro's here.
 
M

Massicot

Member
I would work on getting your license so that you at least have the capability and the know how. But it doesn't mean you have to buy a car. I used to live in a larger-ish metro area and lots of people didn't drive. Where I'm at now it's slightly more necessary. I personally like having the freedom and something valuable to upkeep and maintain, but if that's not something valuable to you then don't sweat it, man.
 
G

Gibbles17

Member
Got my learner's at 15, did driver's training at 16. Didn't get my license until 23. Definitely know what you mean in terms of social awkwardness, I was the dude in high school who my buddies would pick up for parties and such (although all my friends had cars and picking me up was just another opportunity to show them off so win-win).

Went to college at 18 and all but one of the friends I made there had left their cars in their hometowns. Public transit did the trick for a while but after finishing school, I made it a point to get my license ASAP. I was in a similar boat to some of you thinking transit would be sufficient but I take that back 100% looking back. Feels liberating as fuck to be able to go wherever I want at any time instead of having to rely on the bus/train/GF. She also hates driving and I really enjoy it so I handle all of the driving responsibilities now.

Hate to say it, but at least here in Alberta, not having a license in your 20s is definitely an eyebrow raiser and I know dudes who have struck out on dating opportunities when the question comes up. Oddly enough, people around here seem to view non-drivers in a better light if they don't have a car as opposed to no license at all.
 
P

Pancho

Qurupancho
I understand where you're coming from, OP. At least in my country is an absolute neccesity to drive since public transportation is absolute ass so unless you have a car and a driver's liscence you really won't be ableto go anywhere.

Regardless, knowing how to drive and having a liscence is a good thing to do. You may never know what situation you may find yourself in that you will have to drive a car.
 
A

AnathemicOne

Banned
Got my license at 18, living in suburban California makes it a requirement to drive to get anywhere (college, full time career, etc.) And I fucking hate it. Long 1 hour commutes on the freeway in either direction to get anywhere and my tendency to daze off, I absolutely loathe driving.

So yeah imo if you need it like me then by all means go get it but if you don't due to great public transit then I'd say fuck it.
 
A

Apathy

Member
Do you live in some small town or in a large city?

I'm 32 and I've never had a license (due to some medical / anxiety issues). Living in a city with public transport I get around just fine. I've never been turned down for meeting someone just because I didn't drive.
 
D

digdug2k

Member
I started driving at 14 (school permit that I frequently abused). Did lots of dumb things. Had a few accidents.

Eventually I moved somewhere warm and after a year or so I just refuse to drive on snow or ice anymore. Now I live in a crazy big city and don't even own a car, and I think I'll probably just refuse to drive anymore. I'm genuinely scared I've just forgotten how entirely.
 
J

Jeronimo Jones

Member
The actual importance depends on where you live along with the cultural expectations. The town I'm from had no public transportation (not even a taxi service) so driving was a necessity/rite of passage/social expectation all in one for us at around 16.

I know of a college grad from another part of the state that apparently has a fear of driving. I'm not sure how he'll be able to advance with limited independence in a small college town. Relying on friends/family/roommates to drive him to and from his part time job won't work forever. His ability to get to job interviews, social activities, or even move somewhere with better public transportation are severely limited.

And even though he claimed he was working to save for a car, he refused help on learning to drive/getting a license.
 
O.DOGG

O.DOGG

Member
I'm 36 and I never had a license, haven't even tried driving in about 15-16 years. I live in a major city with good public transportation, and don't miss it one bit. Actually I believe I live a happier, more content life without having to worry about where to park, paying for car insurance, gas or maintenance. Plus it's more environmentally friendly. You shouldn't feel pressured to learn to drive unless you yourself want to do it.
 
M

mullet2000

Member
No one will care if you don't drive. I'm 25 and I don't see myself owning a car for YEARS. I'm sure I'll be over 30 before I do.

That said, get your license. It's just useful to have, shows you learned to drive but choose not too (whether due to it being expensive or any other reason) and a lot of jobs arbitrary want you to have one for whatever reason.
 
T

the-pi-guy

Member
In my friend group, I have one friend who got their license at 16. And I got my license at 19, almost 20.
And my other 2 friends still don't have their license, as they turn 21 and 22. OP you are in good company, and you shouldn't worry about it.
 
T

Tetsujin_MK

Member
I'm in my early thirties. I live in Europe, don't drive, probably never will. Public transit is decent here and I live in the city center. Owning a car would be way too expensive for me. Just getting the license costs anywhere between €1000 - 2000 here which is ridiculous in the first place.
 
S

shawnbuddy

Member
I didn't get my license until I was 23. It would have been handy but I didn't REALLY need it until I got an internship at a newspaper. Then I scrambled to get it quickly. That's not a really great way to learn to drive, so I was pretty bad at it for a while.

So I wouldn't feel bad about it as long as it's not limiting you not to have it.
 
G

GuitarAtomik

Member
It's probably been said, but move to a walkable city if you can. I haven't driven my car in like 3 months because I don't need to. Feels amazing. Most people I know don't drive either.
 
A

AdanVC

Member
Nah, son. No worries. I'm 26 and I had only tried driving once when I was 19 and I was obsessed with driving and getting my own car and I had lot's of hopes and dreams. I didn't like it at all and it was stressful af. Never tried it again. I guess driving simply is not for me. I prefer to ride my bike, walk or just take an Uber. Lucky me my work is just a 10 minute walk from home so I don't have to deal on taking the bus and stuff.

Also I have never had problems with the fact that I don't know how to drive and girls... It's the least thing they care. Times are rough so they understand it's difficult to get your own car nowadays.
 
H

haimon

Member
Learning to drive and owning a car are 2 different things.

Knowing to drive so if the need arises or you decide you want to have a car is pretty important.

Plenty of people don't own a car.
 
A

ACE 1991

Member
It's a failure of modern society that we've organized ourselves in such a way (at least in the US) that it's expected for the majority of people to own these hulking, resource-intensive machines. Cars suck (sorry Carheads, cars, among other things, are killing us), and you should feel good about not needing one.
 
Y

yanipheonu

Member
I'm older and have no license. Though I've got a good public transit system to rely on.

Frankly, we're the generation that'll struggle to get a house, holding off on a car seems completely plausible.
 
Z

Zen_Arcade

Banned
The only people who are going to think remotely negatively about you not driving are your friends that hate driving but want to go somewhere with you.

And if you slip them a few bucks for gas that annoyance goes away pretty quickly.
 
V

velociraptor

Junior Member
I passed my driving test last week (26 years old).

However, I've been driving for a while in the past several months.

Honestly driving a car is one of the most useful skills to have. Public transport is fucking disgusting.
 
facetheslayer92

facetheslayer92

Member
Got my license at 18 and never looked back. I love driving and couldn't imagine life without a car. But good for you OP for contributing one less vehicle to our congested roadways!
 
R

RinsFury

Member
I didn't get my license until my late 20's, and rarely drive myself unless I have to. My anxiety goes into overdrive when I get behind the wheel, I find just the experience of driving a few miles to be extremely stressful. Self driving cars can't get here soon enough.
 
A

AlphaDragoon

Member
I'm pretty sure I have a phobia of driving. I got my license about a year ago but I still get physically ill and a sense of dread from driving in traffic. When the streets are clear I don't have a problem at all but making turns into moving traffic messes with me really badly. I wish there was something I could do to help alleviate it, I try to drive to get over it but it doesn't seem to help.
 
S

shandy706

Member
I've been letting my 9 year old daughter practice driving in Forza Horizon 2 and 3. I have her obey the traffic laws and she has gotten pretty good. I set her up with my racing seat and my TMX Pro. It's not a perfect training tool, but it has been good for teaching her to drive with traffic and to watch out for oncoming cars.

Unfortunately it sounds like the OP doesn't have the money to afford a set up like that. For anyone that does, A PC or Xbox One with a wheel is a neat way to practice. Of course nothing replaces the real thing.

I love driving every day that I take out one of my sports cars. It even makes driving to work enjoyable. I plan on teaching my oldest daughter how to drive a manual gearbox within the next few years.

Just practice when you can OP, you'll get it.
 
L

Lan Dong Mik

And why would I want them?
How About No said:
Its not that bad, start out in quieter slower areas and work your way up to freeways



Uhh that doesn't mean you're literally stopping to look at every green-lit intersection tight?
Click to expand...

Oh I don't stop but I do look to the left and right before going through it because I don't trust people to not stop at a red light. Basically just a good thing to be aware of your surroundings when you through and intersection.
 
S

Syriel

Member
DocSeuss said:
Getting a car is liberating as heck, and it can make you feel great about yourself, but the costs are SUPER high.

I don't think it really changes how people perceive you. I have friends who don't drive, and other than a moment of incredulity when I hear it (I live in a place where driving is a necessity if I want anything, like, say, groceries), I'm not judging anybody.
Click to expand...

I think it all depends on where you live.

If you are in a rural or suburban area, a car can be a necessity.

If you live in a city, a car isn't liberating, it is a costly annoyance that serves no purpose. My car is fully functional, but it costs me more than it is worth just to keep around. Probably going to try selling it, but if that fails, I'll just donate it to a local charity.

When you factor in parking, insurance, maintenance (even little stuff like turning it on every month or two to keep the battery charged), etc. it just isn't worth it. Getting rid of the car will save me money.

When there are car share services, on demand rentals, public transit, etc. the math works out in favor of not having a car. Paying for a rental from Enterprise when I need it is cheaper than keeping a car around 24/7.

All that said, having a license is important. You may hardly ever use it, but having the flexibility to drive when you pick up a rental, or to take over for a friend when you're out, is a huge plus.
 
N

norm9

Member
Driving is the best. No longer are you tied down by the bus schedule. It was real easy to learn op. Passed the test after driving around for practice for a couple of hours.
 
J

joe2187

Banned
I didnt learn to drive until I was 27...

I had anxiety about it all the time.

Then I took a week long driving course, took my license test right after and it's the easiest most mundane thing in the world.
 
S

Sir_Crocodile

Member
I live in a city so I've never bothered to learn and don't ever intend to.

Maybe someday I'll buy a self driving car, but even that seems a waste of money for what I'd get out of it.
 
H

How About No

Member
Lan Dong Mik said:
Oh I don't stop but I do look to the left and right before going through it because I don't trust people to not stop at a red light. Basically just a good thing to be aware of your surroundings when you through and intersection.
Click to expand...

ok ok that's fair I guess I kinda do that too (in an open buildingless area, if it was a tight street I guess I'd be fucked)

Honestly it's a dream for me to ditch my car and move to a big city where I could just rely on transit. That way I could look at my phone more before work lol
 
S

Sai-kun

Banned
I didn't get my license until I was 23. Don't worry about it too much. It's a nice skill to have just in case, but if you can navigate your city without it, it's not a problem.
 
D

d1ddy

Member
Just go for it when you feel comfortable I failed my written test 5 times, ended up taking 2-3 driving lessons and passed my road test first try. I am a horrible driver and living proof any moron can get a license now a days. Also I was 22 when I got it, just believe in yourself, learn little things about driving and have some confidence
 
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