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Geostorm Review Thread

Whompa02

Whompa02

Member
Pop-O-Matic said:
Guess we'll just have to settle for the OTHER "future tech goes crazy and causes disasters" film this year.

Kill-Switch-1.jpg
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Oh wow that poster lol. And that's the guy from The Guest
 
M

Martinski43

Member
More reviews are in!

RT score right now: 17%

https://www.timeout.com/us/film/geostorm
"Actually, my brother and I were born in the U.K.," drawls Gerard Butler in this disaster thriller, as if to explain away any accent wobbles from him and onscreen sibling Jim Sturgess. Now in the States, Jake (Butler) is a satellite designer, while Max (Sturgess) works at the White House, where his job mostly seems to involve asking what the hell is going on.
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Rating: 2 out of 5 stars

http://beta.latimes.com/entertainment/movies/la-et-mn-geostorm-review-20171020-story.html
As if we didn't have enough problems on Earth, Hollywood keeps inventing new ways for things to go catastrophically awry. The science-fiction spectacle "Geostorm" introduces an astonishing piece of fictional technology dubbed Dutch Boy — a network of satellites that stabilize our climate. And then the best the filmmakers can think to do with it is to wreck stuff.
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Rating: 30 out of 100 (Metacritic)

https://www.thewrap.com/geostorm-review-gerard-butler/
Putting the ”mental" in ”environmental," the not-screened-for-critics ”Geostorm" is less a scare picture about ignoring climate change than a cautionary flop about trying to do too much in conjuring a perfect storm of genres: end-of-the-world porn, save-the-world triumphalism, space adventure, political thriller, family drama, and workplace romance.
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Rating: 25 out of 100 (Metacritic)

https://www.nytimes.com/2017/10/20/movies/geostorm-review-gerard-butler.html
If I had to spend a global meteorological catastrophe with anyone, I don't think Gerard Butler would be my first choice. But of course I don't have a choice. Mr. Butler's character, Jake Lawson, has a job to do, and so do I. Jake's is to fix the space-based weather-control system he designed and built, racing against a digital clock that counts down the minutes until ”geostorm." Mine involves counting the minutes until ”Geostorm" is over and then offering a comprehensive damage assessment. To quote something Jake says to a grandstanding senator (Richard Schiff) who dares to question his expertise: you're welcome.
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Rating: 20 out of 100 (Metacritic)

http://www.indiewire.com/2017/10/ge...vlin-gerard-butler-disaster-movie-1201889492/
Back on Earth, we're treated to bloodless flashes of destruction, such as a frozen cargo plane crashing into Brazil and... well, actually it's hard to think of too many others. The last 20 minutes notwithstanding, this is more of a Geomist than a Geostorm, and the storytelling is so disjointed that only a small handful of set pieces emerge intact. First-time director Dean Devlin was clearly inspired by the decades he's spent writing and producing for Roland Emmerich, but he seems not to have learned that humans — even the glorified extras whose entire arcs are squeezed into a single sequence — are the lifeblood of a good disaster movie. Here, there isn't any weight to what's happening; Millions of people die, and you hardly feel a thing. ”Geostorm" is terrible entertainment, but it's a remarkably effective window into Donald Trump's soul.
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Rating: 16 out of 100 (Metacritic)
 
L

Lumpy Onion

Member
Not surprised. Saw it alongside 10 trailers before Blade Runner and this was the only one that didn’t leave an impression. Looked like trash...that I’ll probably see on video.
 
S

Steel

Banned
Here, there isn’t any weight to what’s happening; Millions of people die, and you hardly feel a thing. “Geostorm” is terrible entertainment, but it’s a remarkably effective window into Donald Trump’s soul.
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Ok, this was good. I laughed.
 
J

JdFoX187

Banned
Saw this with my wife today, abusing our moviepass. It's...not as bad as one would hope. There's hardly any "disasters" in it. You see most of the stuff after it happens. It feels like they tried to cram two or three movies into one -- creating such a schizophrenic tone where you're supposed to feel really tense and sad at one point and then turn around and laugh at a stupid one liner. It's not even so bad, it's entertaining. It's just boring as shit.

And this Geostorm they keep hyping doesn't even happen. Like, you spend two hours freaking about it and don't even show anything close to it. It's like some script writer got paid by the mentions of "geostorm" in the script.
 
M

Martinski43

Member
BumRush said:
I'll be honest. 21% on RT is higher than anticipated.
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Sitting currently at 14%.

http://www.hollywoodreporter.com/review/geostorm-review-1050835
he planetary-disaster-film equivalent of a two-hour call to tech support, Dean Devlin's Geostorm boils down to that classically annoying hail-mary bit of advice: Have you tried shutting it down and rebooting? Big, dumb, and boring, it finds the cowriter of Independence Day hoping to start a directing career with the same playbook — but forgetting several rules of the game. The result isn't the end of the world, but it's certainly not Armageddon either.
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K

kevin1025

Banned
That's unfortunate. I was hoping for some dumb fun Gerard Butler times.

I was supposed to see an advanced screening of it two days back but chose Lego Ninjago instead. I'm definitely still seeing this when it hits digital!
 
T

tearsintherain

Member
Saw this in 3D IMAX, really enjoyed it. Every actor seemed to think they were in a different genre of movie, from the little brother who was acting in a rom-com to the secret service lady who was in a buddy cop movie to Andy Garcia who genuinely didn't seem to know anything about the plot. This is Sharknado / MST3K levels of bad acting, science, effects, etc. But they know exactly what works, no time is wasted on junk like relationships or personal introspection, its non stop action and it is fantastic.

A great summer blockbuster action movie that panders HARD to worldwide studio audiences, releasing mysteriously in October.
 
N

norm9

Member
Martinski43 said:
What other movies are part in it? Gamer? 300? The Bounty Hunter? PS i Love you? Law Abiding Citizen? Gods of Egypt?
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I was thinking Olympus Has Fallen and London Has Fallen. I was also thinking about that robbery movie where he stands on a ledge while something else is happening in an entirely different part of the city, but I think that's someone else.

eta- Looked it up and it was Sam Worthington starring in Man On A Ledge.
 
F

Fug Slanderson

Member
I've had Moviepass for a couple weeks now and have seen 8 movies in that time, and I have learned that shitty movies aren't worth my time. Gonna pass on this turd.
 
S

shaneo632

Member
I enjoyed the red herring of
the brown airlock guy seeming like a saboteur but he wasnt. Baddies were white! Progress?
 
R

RS4-

Member
shaneo632 said:
I enjoyed the red herring of
the brown airlock guy seeming like a saboteur but he wasnt. Baddies were white! Progress?
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Hahaha yeah, got fucking baited.

Man what a movie. That was...well, I don't know. Now I'm sitting here waiting for Happy Death Day to start
 
M

Martinski43

Member
Why cant we have moviepass in sweden. Too fucking expensive to go see crappy movies like this just for fun or shit faced. It’s like $17-20 for non 3D movies...
 
Insane Metal

Insane Metal

Member
Just came back from the theater.

Don't go see this. Avoid at all costs. It fucking sucks. And I paid just half the ticket. Not worth it. It's not even fun. It's just bad.
 
M

Martinski43

Member
http://www.rogerebert.com/reviews/geostorm-2017
There has been some question as to whether now is the proper time to release a film like ”Geostorm" and not just because it arrives in theaters bearing all the hallmarks of a cinematic disaster in the making: numerous release date changes, reports of extensive reshoots that eliminated some characters entirely while introducing new ones, and the presence of Gerard Butler in the lead role. No, the question is whether the general public will be in a mood to see a movie in which the entire planet is threatened with attacks of extreme weather in the wake of all the meteorological chaos of the last few weeks. As it turns out, people who were leery of going to see it for that reason can rest easy because, despite the ad campaign to the contrary, the film is actually an utterly idiotic and oftentimes boring amalgamation of ”The Day After Tomorrow," ”San Andreas," ”Gravity," ”The Manchurian Candidate" and the lesser Irwin Allen productions. ”Geostorm" fails to work either as awe-inspiring spectacle or as campy silliness.
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Rating: 1 ½ /5 stars

https://www.theguardian.com/film/20...erard-butler-dull-disaster-movie-is-a-washout
When writer-director Dean Devlin titled his handsomely budgeted new action tentpole Geostorm, he entered into an unspoken pact with his prospective audience. He chose a goofy, make-believe word, and in doing so, promised a goofy, make-believe movie. Nobody's walking into the auditorium looking for lofty insights on the complexities of the human condition, or even a commentary on how the timebomb that is climate change continues ticking away due to political gridlock. It ain't Citizen Kane and it ain't An Inconvenient Truth, and there's no sport in expecting it to be. All parties involved should understand the terms of this tacit agreement, an ”if you build it, they will come" proposition in which ”it" refers to nothing short of a natural apocalypse. All Devlin needed to do was deliver a storm, and no ordinary storm – a storm of geo-proportions. To put it in the parlance of our times, you had one job.
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Rating: 2/5 stars

https://www.rottentomatoes.com/m/geostorm
13%
 
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