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GAF, what do you consider to be a food crime?

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K

kirby_fox

Banned
hobblygobbly said:
I know that but I'm talking about the actual taste of blood in some steaks I've had, I don't know if it seeps into those juices but there's an obvious blood taste, some better prepared steaks have it, some don't. Maybe it's just better cuts or something.
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What kind of steaks are you eating? I've had plenty of steak and I've never once tasted blood when cooked at a shorter length of time.

From my personal experience, a lot of people find the concept of eating steak that isn't well done odd and off putting. My family for instance prefers well done steak. Despite this, my step dad likes to mention offhand about me making steak for the family a few times-- and I never cook it well done or above medium.
 
F

FelixOrion

Poet Centuriate
I knowingly commit many food crimes, many of which were/are family things. Some of our many horrible food acts that I know rile people up include:

  • Orange juice served alongside pasta with red meat sauce
  • Chili served with a cinnimon roll (more a Nebraskan thing, but still)
  • Kool-aid ice cream
  • Making jam/jelly from dangerous or strange sources (like peach pits or wine)
 
A

A Fish Aficionado

I am going to make it through this year if it kills me
People need to start making their own ketchup. That's one way to get rid of the notion that it's just a condiment for kids.
 
N

NoblesseOblige

Banned
A Fish Aficionado said:
People need to start making their own ketchup. That's one way to get rid of the notion that it's just a condiment for kids.
Click to expand...

Agreed. People seem to think that corn syrup monstrosity their used to is the only type of ketchup. Homemade ketchup can really add some flavor, especially if you add the right spices.
 
Damerman

Damerman

Member
Pankratous said:
  • Fried egg that hasn't been cooked enough i.e. the yolk is still runny.
  • Anything but well done steak
  • Vegetables on a pizza
  • All cakes that aren't chocolate
  • Mustard on a hot dog
  • Onions that aren't diced (seriously, anything bigger than a tiny cube and the crunchy horrible texture is just impossible to enjoy)
  • Mayonnaise on anything
  • Anything lower than 'Medium' spice at Nandos
  • Cream-based curries (seriously? no spice at all? It's just a yoghurt then)
  • Yoghurts with bits in it
  • American bacon
  • Potato scones that aren't fried. Additionally, they should be fried so much that they are burnt. Non-burnt potato scones are a disgrace.
  • Brown bread
  • Cream on anything, horrible
  • People using knife/fork for hand food i.e. burgers/pizza
  • Excessive vinegar (chippies particularly bad for this)
  • Peanut butter jelly
  • Nutella
  • Indian restaurants that make their chicken pakora and vegetable pakora look identical and you buy a munchie box and have no idea which is which and you end up biting vegetable pakora and suffering because of it
  • Brown rice / fried rice. Gotta be white and boiled.
  • Fried burgers. Please grill it!
  • Pizza without oregano on it. Okay, so I don't see this so much as a crime since the pizza will still be great, but oregano is cheap and enhances the flavor precisely one trillion per cent. It's so good you'd be silly not to.
  • Fusilli pasta. Seriously I know it's just a shape but it just doesn't seem to resonate with me. Penne and macaroni all the way.
  • Coleslaw. It just looks like a bowl of sick.
  • Celery in soup.
  • Twice cooked chips (fries).
  • People not finishing pizza crusts
Click to expand...
Yo, ur fucking crazy.


On topic: ketchup in and of itself is a food crime.
 
A

Anoregon

The flight plan I just filed with the agency list me, my men, Dr. Pavel here. But only one of you!
Damerman said:
Yo, ur fucking crazy.
Click to expand...

Half of that list is "sure whatever people have different tastes" and the other half is "You are dangerous and will corrupt the youth if not stopped"
 
G

Gully State

Member
Using tofu as a meat substitute (ie- tofu burger or tofurkey). It's amazing in this day and age how I still run into people that automatically associate tofu with garbage because some bastard thought that promoting and using it as a meat substitute was a good idea. Tofu is an amazing ingredient capable of taking on many different textures and is amazing at absorbing flavors. The thought of Western cuisine just absolutely butchering this ingredient boils my blood.

Proper use of Tofu
CCTV Chinese Cuisine Documentary - Tofu

maxresdefault.jpg
Click to expand...
agedashi-tofu.jpg
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bcd-tofu-house.jpg
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Whoever made this needs to be thrown in jail
Torfurky2.jpg
Click to expand...
 
M

minor effort

Banned
sweetened iced coffee
sweetened iced tea

Learn to enjoy things without a ton of sugar or corn syrup in it. It's so frustrating to be on the road and want an iced tea and the only options are sweetened ones.
 
Cybrwzrd

Cybrwzrd

Banned
El Topo said:
More or less. I was, of course, not too serious. It's not as if every English dish sucks. Fish and Chips is edible, Roast Beef is fine, Chicken tikka masala (if we count it) is good as well. It's just that that there's more than enough dishes or variations that (at the very least) look bad or seem like an unfortunate combination. English breakfast, which is the go-to example, is just horrendous.
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Whats wrong with English breakfast? Its Bacon, Eggs, Baked Beans,Sausage, Black Pudding, Hash browns, mushrooms and toast?
 
B

backflip10019

Member
Oh yeah, people who put sriracha on everything. That's a new one. It's a good sauce, but there are plenty of better hot sauces out there. It also seems to overtake a lot of flavors, more so than ketchup.
 
P

Playsage

Member
Gully State said:
Using tofu as a meat substitute (ie- tofu burger or tofurkey). It's amazing in this day and age how I still run into people that automatically associate tofu with garbage because some bastard thought that promoting and using it as a meat substitute was a good idea. Tofu is an amazing ingredient capable of taking on many different textures and is amazing at absorbing flavors. The thought of Western cuisine just absolutely butchering this ingredient boils my blood.

Proper use of Tofu
CCTV Chinese Cuisine Documentary - Tofu





Whoever made this needs to be thrown in jail
Click to expand...
THIS. Goddamn...
 
C

clav

Member
Cream cheese in sushi rolls
Ketchup on hot dogs
Cooked Avocados
Organic processed food (e.g. fruit snacks, mac & cheese)
Adding extra salt/sugar in already salted/sweetened foods

Goldenroad said:
Mayonnaise on Sushi. WTF are people thinking?
Click to expand...

What? Japanese mayonnaise is different from traditional mayonnaise. It's more of a sour savory taste.
 
B

BigDes

Member
Cybrwzrd said:
Whats wrong with English breakfast? Its Bacon, Eggs, Baked Beans,Sausage, Black Pudding, Hash browns, mushrooms and toast?
Click to expand...
Remember that aside from going off to kill people in foreign wars no one in America ever goes abroad, so it means the last time anyone from America was actually in the UK was during WW2. Now the food in Britain during ww2 eas pretty shitty as you know the country was being purposefully starved. So the stereotype remains.
 
Cybrwzrd

Cybrwzrd

Banned
BigDes said:
Remember that aside from going off to kill people in foreign wars no one in America ever goes abroad, so it means the last time anyone from America was actually in the UK was during WW2. Now the food in Britain during ww2 eas pretty shitty as you know the country was being purposefully starved. So the stereotype remains.
Click to expand...

Sadly you are pretty much correct about that. Only about 1/3 of Americans have passports and of that cohort not many travel overseas on an annual basis.
 
M

mkenyon

Banned
Putting sugar in everything.

*edit*

Oh, and when you order Chile Rellenos and they bring some half assed looking Omelet with chunks of Pasilla it in. When that first started happening, I didnt even know there were two kinds, and I'd tell them to take it back because they made the wrong thing.
 
W

Wisker

Neo Member
My system can't handle anything below well done. Every time I had steak cooked below well done I was violently ill afterwards.

Can we still be friends Gaf? ( T_T)
 
M

Maklershed

Member
BigDes said:
Remember that aside from going off to kill people in foreign wars no one in America ever goes abroad, so it means the last time anyone from America was actually in the UK was during WW2. Now the food in Britain during ww2 eas pretty shitty as you know the country was being purposefully starved. So the stereotype remains.
Click to expand...

Cybrwzrd said:
Sadly you are pretty much correct about that. Only about 1/3 of Americans have passports and of that cohort not many travel overseas on an annual basis.
Click to expand...
Based on a lot of the weird threads and ideas Brits have about America lately, I'm gonna guess the reverse is true as well. Crossing the Atlantic isn't exactly a hop skip and a jump.
 
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