This is the greatest videogame patent I've ever read

[EmCeeGramr]

http://www.google.com/patents?id=aAu... ra=1#PPA1,M1







holy shit it just goes on like this

It degenerates into a bizarre hundred page ramble about violent games and fiat currency, like some bizarre lovechild of Ayn Rand and Jack Thompson.

[voodoopanda]

Can't wait for the game where you shoot women who quote Lenin in order to save the world.

[Green Tentacle]

That's awesome.

[Raist]

Some people surely have time and money to waste.

[JSnake]

WOMAN BECOMES VAMPIRE/COMMUNIST.

[EmCeeGramr]

if i talk to the hooker and understand her feelings i'll get a magical gold 45 revolver that shoots lightning and unlimited bullets

[XTERC]

L.O.L. this goes on for almost 120 pages!

[Drkirby]

Hey, wait a second, they are trying to patent branching story paths based on dialog choices D:

[Crunched]

Hey, wait a second, they are trying to patent branching story paths based on schizophrenia D:

Fixed.


I would love this game

[ZealousD]

Do a Google search on Dr. Elliot McGucken, the dude who filed for the patent.

It will blow your mind.

[SailorDaravon]

[EmCeeGramr]

L.O.L. this goes on for almost 120 pages!

THE FEMINIZED FIATOCRACY FANBOY MEDIA

Was this written by Denis Dyack's cousin or something?

[nfreakct]

Power: The communists/Matrix/Regime/Sauron/Scottish Nobles

[vandalvideo]

Wow, this just sounds like a clever jab against Communism. :|

[Crunched]

THE FEMINIZED FIATOCRACY FANBOY MEDIA Was this written by Denis Dyack's cousin or something?

Frighteningly enough, I think you're proving his point

[EmCeeGramr]

Power: The communists/Matrix/Regime/Sauron/Scottish Nobles

see i'm just in awe of this

[Saiyar]

Another patent by the same guy.

[0004] This invention is dedicated to Fifty Cent, Eminem, Harlan Elison, Kid Rock, George Lucas, Puff Daddy, Lars Ulrich, Aimee Mann, Kristin Hersh, Scott Weiland, Kristen Hersh, Chris Robinson, toby Keith, Lou Reed, Victoria Shaw, Art Alexakis, the Beatles and Rolling Stones, Bob Dylan, DMX, and every other artist who started off as an indie artist, and all the indie artists to come. The present invention salutes Abraham Lincoln's eloquence, the spirit and words of the United States Constitution and The Declaration of Independence, Johnny Cash, and the Creator they all served. For it is creator's Natural Right to protect and profit from their creations.

[0007] The present invention will provide tools of vast use to artists, creators, and entrepreneurs on their Hero's Journeys, where they answer the call to adventure to build a renaissance. Luke Skywalker had his light saber, Neo had his martial arts, The Man With no Name had his 45 Revolver, and so too will tomorrow's creators have their 45 Revolver.

[Crunched]

This guy is awesome

[EmCeeGramr]

if only gta and god of war had ron paul in them

[Xyphie]

Vampire Communists battling Nazi Zombies holy shit best game idea ever.

[Captain Smoker]

XDXDDXD

[EmCeeGramr]

Will Wright, why do you deny Zeus and the Judeo-Christian God? Why do you hate freedom?

[Crunched]

Your avatar is so perfect for this thread.

[EmCeeGramr]

The GRAND THEFT CONSTITUTION:



EGM enables the caveman fiatocracy:

[Raide]

Vampire Communists battling Nazi Zombies holy shit best game idea ever.

Game of the Forever!

[Machine]

I just sent him a friend invite on FB. I wonder if he will accept.

[Stumpokapow]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elliot_McGucken

what the fuck

[EmCeeGramr]

http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Elliot_McGucken what the fuck

McGucken received a B.A. in physics from Princeton and a Ph.D. in physics from UNC Chapel Hill where his dissertation on an artificial retina chip[2][3][4][5][6][7] for the blind received a Merrill Lynch Innovations Award[8][9]. The dissertation was titled "Multiple unit artificial retina chipset to aid the visually impaired and enhanced holed-emitter CMOS phototransistors,"[10][11] and the appendix contained an early treatment of McGucken's Moving Dimensions Theory. McGucken received several "Fight for Sight" grants for his retina-chip research, and it appeared in publications including Sensors Magazine, Popular Science[12], Business Week[13], and the National Science Foundation's Frontiers [14] [15].

Oh shit guys. We better buy his game, or he's gonna go Galt and take his retina chips and go home!

[Zzoram]

So does he do these patents to show how much of a joke the patent system is?

[RavenFox]

He's never going to use this anyway. Just to sit back and troll to find someone to sue.

So does he do these patents to show how much of a joke the patent system is?

Hmm why is that sir?

[Raide]

I cannot wait for the first object to appear that fully uses this next-gen technology.

[Slayer-33]

wtf is this? lol

[EmCeeGramr]

He's never going to use this anyway. Just to sit back and troll to find someone to sue.

Dude read it, he's not patent trolling, this is some kind of crazy manifesto.

[FoxSpirit]

Dude read it, he's not patent trolling, this is some kind of crazy manifesto.

I wonder why he put it into the form of a patent?

[EmCeeGramr]

Oh God, first he was trying to patent dialog trees based on crazy philosophy, now I find that he's trying to patent a morality system.

http://www.google.com/patents?id=ee-...ad=0_0#PPA2,M1

MORALITY SYSTEM AND METHOD FOR VIDEO GAME: SYSTEM AND METHOD FOR CREATING STORY, DEEPER MEANING AND EMOTIONS, ENHANCED CHARACTERS AND AI, AND DRAMATIC ART

[EmCeeGramr]

Here's his idea for a vampire/zombie game: KILL THE COMMUNIST MEDIA BANKERS



Murdering psychiatrists and people who don't accept the gold standard? Finally, a game both Tom Cruise and JayDubya can enjoy.



This sounds like a pretty rad game, bro!



So for my game idea, we kill all the atheist doctors because the women won't stay in the kitchen:



Killing prostitutes is the idiot feminazi fiatocracy, killing hipsters for cursing is the Classical Ideal of The Founding Fathers:



For some reason I'm going to include a c/p of a conversation I had on the BioWare forums, is that okay? That's part of a patent, right???





Reminder, this is a patent about video games.

[Saiyar]

So does he do these patents to show how much of a joke the patent system is?

That is the impression I get. One of his patents includes a made up interview with 50 cent in it's description, I doubt he is being serious.

[dollartaco]

Oh shit guys. We better buy his game, or he's gonna go Galt and take his retina chips and go home!

ahaha

[Kinitari]

Wow, this just sounds like a clever jab against Communism. :|

wat.

[FoxSpirit]

I think this guy has golden humour

[Saiyar]

I think this guy has golden humour

I don't know what is funnier. The patents or the fact that they seem to be getting granted .

[jooey]

wait, so are these patents or Insomnia articles?

[Sickboy007]

Hayek cures vampirism?



Big mistake.

[Keyser Soze]

WHAT DOES PLAYER DO?

[duckroll]

WHAT DOES PLAYER DO?

Quote Marx to end the world.

[speculawyer]

Is this a patent or the insane ratings of mad man?

It is funny how it mocks its detractors and suggests that people 'Get over it' . . . it is as if he knew in advance that it would become the object of ridicule . . . which it is right now.

[speculawyer]

The Fed? This is like a videogame from the guy who shot up the Holocaust museum.


This guy must have done too much acid.

[speculawyer]

I don't know what is funnier. The patents or the fact that they seem to be getting granted .

No, they are just published . . . that doesn't confer any rights.

The patent office has to accept anything that people submit & pay the fees for.

That said, he may be able to get some claims allowed . . . but they'll cover something no one would even want to infringe upon.

[mattiewheels]

do you guys read video game patents?

is that like something that people do now?

[Crunched]

do you guys read video game patents? is that like something that people do now?

Did you forget where you were?