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mrbagdt
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:21 PM)
i already said this in the MMA thread (pretty much the only place i post), but I guess its probably worth sharing with everyone.

pretty crazy story from this weekend. a good friend of mine was asleep on his couch friday night and at 4:30 in the morning he woke up with a guy punching him in the face and basically trying to kill him in his apartment(small loft above a garage). as he started to wake up and realize what was going on he had a 180 pound naked man attacking him, he is about 5'5'' and 140. he got his nose broken and got hit in the face several times but was able to catch the dude in a triangle and made him pass out. he got up and tried to find something to tie the guy up with, but the guy started to wake up and they began fighting again, catching him in a triangle a second time and putting him to sleep. he said the dude was trying to gouge his eyes the whole time and bit him on his chest and stomach.

after putting him to sleep the second time, he was completely exhausted (he said this was after almost 20 minutes) and he got up, found his phone, put on some shoes, the guy woke up a third time and he guillotine choked him. after that, he closed his doors, locked everything and went outside, putting a dumpster in front of the door. the cops showed up and went into the apartment and arrested the guy- he was passed out when they found him. my friend had to go to the ER and will probably have to get some blood tests done to make sure he didnt get anything.

the guy was high on PCP and was just out of his mind. my buddy trains bjj with me and is a purple belt, it surely saved his life from that animal. he is a pretty big pacifist and the number one question he has gotten so far is 'well i would have just killed the guy' but he didnt think he would be able to live with that.

point of the story- lock your doors at night.

a few pictures and his posts are on his twitter if you are interested- i really thought the whole thing was a made up story until i called him as he was leaving the hospital. insane.
Costanza
Banned
(11-02-2009, 09:23 PM)
the fuck
jamesinclair
smells clean, brushes teeth. Also combs hair regularly.
(11-02-2009, 09:23 PM)
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Who the fuck doesnt lock their doors :lol



(Your friend is about to turn into a zombie BTW)
NomarTyme
(11-02-2009, 09:23 PM)
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I wish somebody recorded this.
PantherLotus
Professional Schmuck
(11-02-2009, 09:23 PM)
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It's so weird how the only people I know of that get attacked like that just happen to be trained in Brazillian Ju Jujitsu.
EmCeeGramr
If ghosts needed to breathe, dead people would use up all the air and we'd suffocate
(11-02-2009, 09:24 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

he got up and tried to find something to tie the guy up with, but the guy started to wake up and they began fighting again, catching him in a triangle a second time and putting him to sleep. he said the dude was trying to gouge his eyes the whole time and bit him on his chest and stomach.

Shit dude, that was a fucking zombie.
Tony Rocky Horror
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:24 PM)
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You know why the fuck you should close your doors at night? Insurance.
Borgnine
MBA in pussy licensing and rights management
(11-02-2009, 09:24 PM)
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Originally Posted by PantherLotus

It's so weird how the only people I know of that get attacked like that just happen to be trained in Brazillian Ju Jujitsu.

They don't think they need to lock their doors, so they're always open.
mrbagdt
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:25 PM)

Originally Posted by jamesinclair

(Your friend is about to turn into a zombie BTW)

holy crap you might be right, i didnt realize this before!
awilliams213
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:25 PM)
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Wow that's a crazy story thank goodness he's okay and he had the skills to stop the attacker but not kill him. Though what jury would convict him :lol
fistfulofmetal
Banned
(11-02-2009, 09:25 PM)
i dont lock my doors.

i don't give a fuck.
Tony Rocky Horror
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:25 PM)
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Also, he looks quite messed up! :O
Binabik15
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:26 PM)
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Originally Posted by jamesinclair

Who the fuck doesnt lock their doors :lol



(Your friend is about to turn into a zombie BTW)

Nah, sounds more like a Quisling.
usea
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:26 PM)
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Originally Posted by jamesinclair

Who the fuck doesnt lock their doors :lol

We never locked our doors, at my parent's house. They still don't, and neither do most of my friends in that town.
UnholySpectacle
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:26 PM)
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All I can say is "wow" at the pic of dude's pants and kitchen floor.
-PXG-
-dry humper-
(11-02-2009, 09:26 PM)
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The fuck?
NomarTyme
(11-02-2009, 09:26 PM)
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Originally Posted by fistfulofmetal

i dont lock my doors.

i don't give a fuck.

That because you want to trap them and wear their skin!
-PXG-
-dry humper-
(11-02-2009, 09:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by fistfulofmetal

i dont lock my doors.

i don't give a fuck.

No one stalks a stalker, unless they're from the FBI or something. Better watch out.
Combichristoffersen
Combovers don't work when there is no hair
(11-02-2009, 09:27 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

180 pound naked man

Originally Posted by jamesinclair

(Your friend is about to turn into a zombie BTW)

sup

DeaconKnowledge
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:27 PM)
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Who doesn't lock their door at night? The only time my door is unlocked is when i'm going through it or know who's on the other side, and I live in a peaceful as fuck neighborhood.
Anticitizen One
Banned
(11-02-2009, 09:28 PM)
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"guys a maniac...WHYD HE BITE ME?" - truck driver, Resident Evil 2
TruHero
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:28 PM)
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Originally Posted by PantherLotus

It's so weird how the only people I know of that get attacked like that just happen to be trained in Brazillian Ju Jujitsu.

:lol


And really, there are people who don't lock their doors at night?
Rewrite
Not as deep as he thinks
(11-02-2009, 09:28 PM)
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Damn. That is insane. Good thing he is okay. I can't imagine the scenario without a little chuckle though. Also, why didn't he lock the door? Everyone should do it.
Salazar
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:28 PM)
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I was just reading in Simon Critchley's book on philosophers, about one of them (can't for the life of me remember who) who, when researching in his study, was burst in on by an escapee from Bedlam (London asylum). The crazy chap told the philosopher he was going to hurl him from the window.

Thinking quickly, as philosophers do, he suggested that they first throw his dog out of the window. They did, the dog plummeted and splattered all over the pavement. The philosopher said, 'what fun ! Go and fetch it, and we'll drop it again'. The lunatic dashed out to do so, and the philosopher slammed and bolted his door.
JambiBum
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:29 PM)
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Have a similar story to this, but it doesn't involve anything MMA. Friend of mine lives in the same apartment complex as me but on the first floor. Guy has some pretty nice audio/video equipment in his place that you can see through his sliding door from the outside. Friend was in his kitchen and a guy knocked on his door. My friend answers it thinking it's someone he knows and instead he gets greeted with a guy with a gun. The robber didn't expect my friend to answer the door so he was caught off guard. Friend grabs the barrel of the gun and uses his other arm to elbow the guy's forearm. Robber pulls the trigger on the gun and shoots my friend through his hand. Friend elbows the guy in the face and takes the gun from the robber. Starts pistol whipping the robber with his own gun :lol . Eventually bashes the guy's face in to the point that the guy is knocked out.

Friend called the cops. Cops show up. Laugh at the stupidity of the robber. The bullet went straight through my friend's hand.
Scullibundo
MEMBER
(11-02-2009, 09:29 PM)
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Sure, they always say the attacker was probably on PCP whenever he arrives naked and tries to kill somebody for apparently no reason. Was your friend going out with a girl named Sarah?
NomarTyme
(11-02-2009, 09:29 PM)
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Originally Posted by Salazar

I was just reading in Simon Critchley's book on philosophers, about one of them (can't for the life of me remember who) who, when researching in his study, was burst in on by an escapee from Bedlam (London asylum). The crazy chap told the philosopher he was going to hurl him from the window.

Thinking quickly, as philosophers do, he suggested that they first throw his dog out of the window. They did, the dog plummeted and splattered all over the pavement. The philosopher said, 'what fun ! Go and fetch it, and we'll drop it again'. The lunatic dashed out to do so, and the philosopher slammed and bolted his door.

fucking bastard. :(
JasonMCG
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:29 PM)
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I lived at The Manor (an old 3-story house in Denver, Cap Hill) for three and half years. Never once locked the doors. Never once got robbed. I think there was some kind unwritten pact that was made between my roommates and I and the bad guys in Denver because we let homeless people stay in the shed and sleep on the porch in the winter time. They protected us with hobo magic.
EmCeeGramr
If ghosts needed to breathe, dead people would use up all the air and we'd suffocate
(11-02-2009, 09:30 PM)
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my nose isnt that bad, i actually just sneezed and was ok (surprising) i do have a bite mark on my chest that still hurts though

my face is turning into a shade scale for the color purple.

Yep, definite zombification. Better just put him down now, man. If the doctors run blood tests then the second they realize the horrifying results, that'll make the suspenseful music reach its peak and they'll suddenly be attacked right before warning the police.
Veidt
Blasphemer who refuses to accept bagged milk as his personal savior
(11-02-2009, 09:30 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt



the guy was high on PCP and was just out of his mind.

Last edited by Veidt; 11-02-2009 at 09:36 PM.
ToxicAdam
Banned
(11-02-2009, 09:31 PM)
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Even when I was dirt poor I had something of value in my apartment/loft. I would never leave it unlocked.

Unless, I lived out in the boonies or rural area. Does you friend live out in the middle of nowhere?
pringles
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:32 PM)
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Thread title is wrong, this is why you shouldn't do PCP.

You should lock your doors at night because WHY THE HELL WOULDN'T YOU LOCK YOUR DOORS AT NIGHT?
XiaNaphryz
LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
(11-02-2009, 09:32 PM)
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Originally Posted by Binabik15

Nah, sounds more like a Quisling.

Correct, a real zombie wouldn't pass out from a choke hold.
BakedPigeon
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:33 PM)
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Originally Posted by jamesinclair

Who the fuck doesnt lock their doors :lol



(Your friend is about to turn into a zombie BTW)

I don't but then again I do live in a very small mountain town in Utah filled with nothing but Mormons.
How About No
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:33 PM)
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Holy shit, that's scary.

The eye-gouging attempt reminds me of the end of 28 Days later.

D:
-PXG-
-dry humper-
(11-02-2009, 09:34 PM)
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After reading the OP, I have an image of a crazy dude, screaming at the top of his lungs, foaming at the mouth, dick flopping all about and flailing his arms around. I can't stop laughing. :lol
newsguy
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:34 PM)
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:lol :lol :lol :lol

Thread should be titled "Why you should learn BJJ." I mean, 3 straight chokes and put the guy out each time? That's badass man! This story is so ridiculous it has to be true.
Pimpwerx
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:35 PM)
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When I lived near RPI, we never locked our doors. Someone was almost always home, and there were 8 of us in the house. One night, some dude just wanders into our apartment and starts looking around. We're a bunch of stoners, but we see him walk in the door and right past us. One of my roommates (crazy Jersey guy) stands up, walks over to him, points back at the door and says, "if you don't leave in 5 seconds, you're gonna need an ambulance to carry you out." The guy, wisely turns and walks back out. None of us said a word the whole time, except the one roommate. It was the weirdest thing ever. Had he done that during one of the many nights we were drinking, I think we would have stomped a mudhole in him. PEACE.
mrbagdt
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:36 PM)
as far as why he didnt lock the door, its kind of hard to say. we were at a halloween party until 2 or so and a few people went back to his place to hang out, they were actually just grappling on his practice mats because one of our friends had a green man costume and it was kind of funny. we all left at about 4 and he got attacked just over half an hour later. he told me when the attack first started he thought it was one of us just messing with him.

i probably should have added this little nugget to the story- the guy didnt seem to show up naked. my friend was sleeping on his couch and the guy must have gone into his bedroom, removed his clothes in there and then attacked my friend. no idea who the guy was so they didnt know each other at all. pretty lucky the guy went into his place because he lives in a loft above in a garage, the house in front has an elderly couple and they wouldnt have been able to do anything.
Pimpwerx
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:36 PM)
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Originally Posted by BakedPigeon

I don't but then again I do live in a very small mountain town in Utah filled with nothing but Mormons.

And serial killers. Serial killers and rapists love them some mountain towns. PEACE.
Milk Lizard
Banned
(11-02-2009, 09:36 PM)

Originally Posted by jamesinclair

Who the fuck doesnt lock their doors :lol

Me. I have lived in this appartment for about 4 years and never locked the door at night. I however once had a chick sleeping on my couch when i woke up, she told me she had been sleeping there all night after my neighbours party stopped. Also i never lock the door when i leave the home (and no one are here).
EmCeeGramr
If ghosts needed to breathe, dead people would use up all the air and we'd suffocate
(11-02-2009, 09:37 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

i probably should have added this little nugget to the story- the guy didnt seem to show up naked. my friend was sleeping on his couch and the guy must have gone into his bedroom, removed his clothes in there and then attacked my friend.

He heard that your friend liked to partner up with dudes for some BJJ action and got the wrong idea.
LiveWire
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:38 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

a few pictures and his posts are on his twitter if you are interested-

His next tweet will be: "Itchy. Hungry."
newsguy
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:38 PM)
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Originally Posted by Pimpwerx

"if you don't leave in 5 seconds, you're gonna need an ambulance to carry you out." I think we would have stomped a mudhole in him. PEACE.

The irony of your sig is priceless here.
bud
straight
(11-02-2009, 09:38 PM)
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i hear they don't lock their doors in canada
Pimpwerx
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:38 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

as far as why he didnt lock the door, its kind of hard to say. we were at a halloween party until 2 or so and a few people went back to his place to hang out, they were actually just grappling on his practice mats because one of our friends had a green man costume and it was kind of funny. we all left at about 4 and he got attacked just over half an hour later.

i probably should have added this little nugget to the story- the guy didnt seem to show up naked. my friend was sleeping on his couch and the guy must have gone into his bedroom, removed his clothes in there and then attacked my friend. no idea who the guy was so they didnt know each other at all. pretty lucky the guy went into his place because he lives in a loft above in a garage, the house in front has an elderly couple and they wouldnt have been able to do anything.

Your friend showed remarkable restraint not killing that guy. If I was brutally attacked like that and slipped in triangle or RNC, the paramedics/cops would have to pry me off him with the jaws of life. I wouldn't let go...period. Not sure if I'd be able to handle the guilt, but I'm certain the rage would have taken hold by then. Glad he's safe. PEACE.
-PXG-
-dry humper-
(11-02-2009, 09:39 PM)
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Originally Posted by Milk Lizard

Me. I have lived in this appartment for about 4 years and never locked the door at night. I however once had a chick sleeping on my couch when i woke up, she told me she had been sleeping there all night after my neighbours party stopped. Also i never lock the door when i leave the home (and no one are here).

Well, don't even think about making a "woe is me" thread when someone decides to jack all your shit.
SnakeswithLasers
If I want to pay a black man $20 to suck him off in a public bathroom, by God and Country, I SHALL.
(11-02-2009, 09:39 PM)
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Originally Posted by mrbagdt

the number one question he has gotten so far is 'well i would have just killed the guy' but he didnt think he would be able to live with that.

I'm not sure if you know this, but that isn't actually a question.
Tarazet
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:39 PM)
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My dad is an obsessive door-locker.. and we lived in a neighborhood that was so safe, even the deer weren't afraid of anything. He would lock the door if I went out to get the mail. :lol And I've picked it up..
stephendedalus
Member
(11-02-2009, 09:39 PM)
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Ugh... I know so many people like this... and they all are pretty heavily into some sort of martial art. I am so glad that they think there isn't a situation that you wont be able to get yourself out of with the use of fists, feet, and magic powers... but geez, get a clue!

Eh, pictures...

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