[iirate]

I haven't really talked about this here cause I've been trying to avoid Livejournal'ing in this thread... but my FFS surgery in September is officially confirmed and pretty much fully paid for, I'm very excited!

That's freaking awesome!

[Boogiepop]

Hey everyone!

I've actually been lurking for a while, but this is probably my first time openly posting in a trans thread.

Anyway, I've mostly been kind of wiggling back and forth for about two and a half years now, telling myself "I'm trans," "I'm not," "I need to transition," "I don't need to transition" on and off nonstop. (At least through my entire highschool experience I was in some form of denial, figuring I wasn't actually trans, just curious as to what it'd be like to be a woman.)

I came out to my parents a bit after things finally clicked with me, and they were accepting (as I expected), but I of course waffled back and forth afterwards (as I can't help but do) and they're so overprotective anyway that I can't help but feel like I'm kinda half coming out to them anytime I mention anything.

So I've mostly just been stuck in a back and forth of feeling like "I'm fine" to "oh god this is crushing me," and it's just been kind of going on like that. Of course I'm talking to a professional (someone who comes recommended by the community from what I can tell), but even there I feel like I'm leaving a different impression with him each time because I'm so mentally wishy-washy. In the meantime I've just been slowly taking baby steps on my own, like shaving off pretty much all my body hair (people noticed my arm hair disappearing after a while, but I've managed to play it off for now), as well as stuff like just trying to grow out my hair.

Hopefully I didn't go overboard in venting.

[shidoshi]

You have to take it at your own pace. I feel like I've been taking things really slowly as well, but I have a complex home situation to deal with, and I want to make sure that what I'm doing isn't a mistake.

It can be really, really frustrating, but I'd rather have frustration now than huge regret later if I just dive in before being sure of the actions I'm taking.

[IceDoesntHelp]

Don't over work yourself, or force yourself to do things, and as said above..take it at your own pace.

Anyway, I'm going away for awhile. I have depression issues and suicide thoughts to work out, as well as finding a job that won't reject me right away. Thanks for all the help so far. Hope to be back sooner rather than later.

[Songbird]

Don't over work yourself, or force yourself to do things, and as said above..take it at your own pace. Anyway, I'm going away for awhile. I have depression issues and suicide thoughts to work out, as well as finding a job that won't reject me right away. Thanks for all the help so far. Hope to be back sooner rather than later.

Best of luck to you!

[lexi]

Hey everyone! I've actually been lurking for a while, but this is probably my first time openly posting in a trans thread. Anyway, I've mostly been kind of wiggling back and forth for about two and a half years now, telling myself "I'm trans," "I'm not," "I need to transition," "I don't need to transition" on and off nonstop. (At least through my entire highschool experience I was in some form of denial, figuring I wasn't actually trans, just curious as to what it'd be like to be a woman.) I came out to my parents a bit after things finally clicked with me, and they were accepting (as I expected), but I of course waffled back and forth afterwards (as I can't help but do) and they're so overprotective anyway that I can't help but feel like I'm kinda half coming out to them anytime I mention anything. So I've mostly just been stuck in a back and forth of feeling like "I'm fine" to "oh god this is crushing me," and it's just been kind of going on like that. Of course I'm talking to a professional (someone who comes recommended by the community from what I can tell), but even there I feel like I'm leaving a different impression with him each time because I'm so mentally wishy-washy. In the meantime I've just been slowly taking baby steps on my own, like shaving off pretty much all my body hair (people noticed my arm hair disappearing after a while, but I've managed to play it off for now), as well as stuff like just trying to grow out my hair. Hopefully I didn't go overboard in venting.

I remember experiencing similar turmoil in my adolescence, teens and early 20s. It was mostly denial and my refusal to accept that I was different. I tried really hard to ignore how I felt and just try to be 'normal'. Even after accepting myself as trans, that wasn't the end of it. I tried to accept being trans without needing to transition. I changed my lifestyle, eating habits, clothes, hair, all in the (vain) hope that it would somehow suffice.

It didn't.

I don't really regret how I've lived my life but if I could change one thing, it would be to stop procrastinating, stop making excuses, stop denying and just take action. I'm not saying this will apply to anyone here, but I hope it can lend some direction to those that may need it.

Oh and welcome btw!

[Jamie xxoo]

Hello, it's been a few years since I last posted because I reset my GAF password but no longer had access to the email address I set it up with. I just finally got the account working again.

Since last posting I finished transition! I'm also a redhead instead of an ash blonde.

... that's all I got.

[EatChildren]

Welcome back.

[Jamie xxoo]

Thanks. I like what you've done with the place.

[lexi]

I'm also a redhead instead of an ash blonde.

Red ftw.

[Maiar_m]

Hello, it's been a few years since I last posted because I reset my GAF password but no longer had access to the email address I set it up with. I just finally got the account working again. Since last posting I finished transition! I'm also a redhead instead of an ash blonde. ... that's all I got.

Glad to have you back. I would probably never have been introduced to this thread and what it discusses if not for you.

[Jamie xxoo]

Glad to have you back. I would probably never have been introduced to this thread and what it discusses if not for you.

Oh. Sorry about that.

;)

[Hop]

Woo Jamie! :D

So like I mentioned on IRC, I came out at work yesterday and approximately zero fucks were given. Though to be fair, I only talked to my boss about it so far- my coworkers are a little juvenile so that'll be a little tricky, and I suspect HR will be all HR-y and make it more awkward than it needs to be.

And I'm kinda glamming out a little for PAX- getting my brows waxed, mani/pedi done, and I'm dying my hair purple (because I can, dammit). Coming in Monday with all that and coming out to the rest of the team is gonna be amusing. :)

[Dead Man]

Woo Jamie! :D So like I mentioned on IRC, I came out at work yesterday and approximately zero fucks were given. Though to be fair, I only talked to my boss about it so far- my coworkers are a little juvenile so that'll be a little tricky, and I suspect HR will be all HR-y and make it more awkward than it needs to be. And I'm kinda glamming out a little for PAX- getting my brows waxed, mani/pedi done, and I'm dying my hair purple (because I can, dammit). Coming in Monday with all that and coming out to the rest of the team is gonna be amusing. :)

Awesome, hope the co workers are as good as the boss was.

[CHEEZMO™]

and I'm dying my hair purple

[Hop]

http://i.imgur.com/92TVn.gif

And I wear Chuck Taylors. I am PunkBunny. *nod*

But seriously, I do think that more people should be free to do their hair unnatural colors if they want, especially as we continue moving to a world where professional interaction is less often in-person. (Besides, professionalism is a personality, not a look, and suits are a stupid relic.) That, and when I've done it before I felt like my hair drew all the attention, so any uncommon gender expression I was also putting out was a bit ignored in favor of hair color. So it actually may help ease out the social portions of transitioning and make getting comfortable a little easier. At least, that's what I'm telling myself!

[Lucario]

And I wear Chuck Taylors. I am PunkBunny. *nod* But seriously, I do think that more people should be free to do their hair unnatural colors if they want, especially as we continue moving to a world where professional interaction is less often in-person. (Besides, professionalism is a personality, not a look, and suits are a stupid relic.) That, and when I've done it before I felt like my hair drew all the attention, so any uncommon gender expression I was also putting out was a bit ignored in favor of hair color. So it actually may help ease out the social portions of transitioning and make getting comfortable a little easier. At least, that's what I'm telling myself!

I'm going to be at PAX as well... and I already have purple hair and wear pink Chuck Taylors.

Stop copying meeeeeee. :P

(Sound theory on the hair color thing, though. If it's for PAX East you should dye it now; most commercially available purples will initially be far darker initially than after 3-4 washes, and the color most people want is the lighter one.... It doesn't look great right after you dye it.)

[EatChildren]

Red ftw.

Agreed.

[InfiniteNine]

Yay Jamie! :D

Red heads> Other heads


And congrats again Charron, I hope things go smoothly for ya at work~!

[Femmeworth]

Welcome back, Jamie. :)

[Zaraki_Kenpachi]

Hello, it's been a few years since I last posted because I reset my GAF password but no longer had access to the email address I set it up with. I just finally got the account working again. Since last posting I finished transition! I'm also a redhead instead of an ash blonde. ... that's all I got.

Like hair red or dye red?

[Roquentin]

Hello, it's been a few years since I last posted because I reset my GAF password but no longer had access to the email address I set it up with. I just finally got the account working again. Since last posting I finished transition! I'm also a redhead instead of an ash blonde. ... that's all I got.

Welcome back! That's a lot of good news for such a short post :)

[shidoshi]

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers! You didn't have to earn the hair color through years and years of torment as a child! You didn't have to go through the pain of hating your hair until the long-awaited day that you could finally accept yourself for who you really are!

Reparations! I want reparations!


...yes, I'm very bitter on this topic. Shut up.

[Femmeworth]

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers! You didn't have to earn the hair color through years and years of torment as a child! You didn't have to go through the pain of hating your hair until the long-awaited day that you could finally accept yourself for who you really are! Reparations! I want reparations! ...yes, I'm very bitter on this topic. Shut up.

*slowly backs out of thread*

[Dai101]

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers! You didn't have to earn the hair color through years and years of torment as a child! You didn't have to go through the pain of hating your hair until the long-awaited day that you could finally accept yourself for who you really are! Reparations! I want reparations! ...yes, I'm very bitter on this topic. Shut up.

[Hop]

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers! You didn't have to earn the hair color through years and years of torment as a child! You didn't have to go through the pain of hating your hair until the long-awaited day that you could finally accept yourself for who you really are! Reparations! I want reparations! ...yes, I'm very bitter on this topic. Shut up.

....hugs?

[CHEEZMO™]

[shidoshi]

Oh, I know, I know; my type are supposed to sit down and shut up as the man—aka the blondes and brunettes of the world—appropriate our culture. I can just take only so much of seeing my red-haired brothers and sisters slandered by the majority, while that majority then steals our identity and passes it off as their own!

Reparations!

[Femmeworth]

Oh, I know, I know; my type are supposed to sit down and shut up as the man—aka the blondes and brunettes of the world—appropriate our culture. I can just take only so much of seeing my red-haired brothers and sisters slandered by the majority, while that majority then steals our identity and passes it off as their own! Reparations!

*using a megaphone* Shidoshi, please put the knife down. No one needs to get hurt. *motions to SWAT team*

[Professor Beef]

C'mon now, Shidoshi! We all love redheads!

[Parallax]

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers! You didn't have to earn the hair color through years and years of torment as a child! You didn't have to go through the pain of hating your hair until the long-awaited day that you could finally accept yourself for who you really are! Reparations! I want reparations! ...yes, I'm very bitter on this topic. Shut up.

Oh, I know, I know; my type are supposed to sit down and shut up as the man—aka the blondes and brunettes of the world—appropriate our culture. I can just take only so much of seeing my red-haired brothers and sisters slandered by the majority, while that majority then steals our identity and passes it off as their own! Reparations!

heh heh, yes! fight the powers that be damnit!

[Femmeworth]

C'mon now, Shidoshi! We all love redheads!

*hears shidoshi laugh maniacally* Poor choice of words!

[Professor Beef]

*hears shidoshi laugh maniacally* Poor choice of words!

What have I done...

[Jamie xxoo]

So like I mentioned on IRC, I came out at work yesterday and approximately zero fucks were given.

That's wonderful! What state/country are you doing this in? Does the purple require bleaching first? It's really hard to grow your hair (if you want to) if you keep bleaching it, it makes the ends split.

Like hair red or dye red?

Dye red. It's kind of dark magenta.

Y'all are some redhead bandwagon jumpers!

My experience of being a red head is that you get hit on a lot more. So I don't know what you're being such a martyr about. :P

[InfiniteNine]

My experience of being a red head is that you get hit on a lot more. So I don't know what you're being such a martyr about. :P

Shidoshi just wants to hog all the compliments and butt grabs~!

[Platy]

I vote for purple hair gaf .... i would have it now, but my hair is so bad that it would melt if I do any chemistry on it =/

*makes some joke about carpets and drapes to shidoshi and walks away running*

[shidoshi]

Shidoshi just wants to hog all the compliments and butt grabs~!

I resent... potentially resemble that remark!

Also, taking a break for a moment from my psychotic ranting, very nice to see Jamie back, and super-awesome Charron as to your experience with coming out to your boss!

[Hop]

That's wonderful! What state/country are you doing this in? Does the purple require bleaching first? It's really hard to grow your hair (if you want to) if you keep bleaching it, it makes the ends split.

I'm in the moderately-lame part of New York, so it's about the reaction I expected. If I were upstate it'd be a real problem, but...

Yea, bleaching tonight, dying it overnight. I've done it a lot of times before, I know what I'm doing. Kinda. Mostly. >_>

Also, HR was equally "yea, whatever" about it, which is appreciated. Still hate the company but it's nice to know the people don't suck.

[Jamie xxoo]

Also, HR was equally "yea, whatever" about it, which is appreciated. Still hate the company but it's nice to know the people don't suck.

Great news, sounds like losing your job won't be a problem. I was just in NYC and I felt more at home there than anywhere I've ever lived, it's my favourite place in the world.

[Hop]

Bah, my hair came out blue/green instead of purple. :(

But at least I'm back on the crazy-colors wagon. :)

[Jamie xxoo]

Pic? (You can blur out your face if you want to be anon.) Blue is my favourite hair colour. When I was starting to go for a bright blond before I went to red, I was thinking about a blunt blue fringe.

[Hop]

Pic? (You can blur out your face if you want to be anon.) Blue is my favourite hair colour. When I was starting to go for a bright blond before I went to red, I was thinking about a blunt blue fringe.

Hairfail.jpg

Dunno why I hid myself since I'm meeting actual gaffers within 24 hours...

But yea, took the other jar of purple I have and now I'm soaking in a do-over. The salon folks were pretty positive about it but I still think it looked lousy. They did a great job with my brows though, I actually have curve and definition now. :D

And I know I looked weird as all hell picking up my GAF shirts from UPS. Since I did it right after the salon, so there I am with frizzled, shitty-blue hair, turquoise nails, still wearing the pedicure flip-flops. Easily the most interesting thing that guy will see all day. ^_^

[Platy]

Can't find an english source and I don't have enoght courage to bump that thread ... but ... you people will probably feel good to know that brazilian lgbt sites are reporting that the canadian miss was accepted back on the contest !

If she show the female documents and stuffs like that.

And it tells that the problem was mainly that wrote that she was cis in the papers ... as much as I can't imagine that they have a "sex you were born with" question on the registration form =P

[Dai101]

Can't find an english source and I don't have enoght courage to bump that thread ... but ... you people will probably feel good to know that brazilian lgbt sites are reporting that the canadian miss was accepted back on the contest ! If she show the female documents and stuffs like that. And it tells that the problem was mainly that wrote that she was cis in the papers ... as much as I can't imagine that they have a "sex you were born with" question on the registration form =P

Yup. I read that in local sources (Mexico) yesterday. Good for her and the whole transgender community i guess.

Don't worry, i'll bump that thread, i can take the flak ;)

[Jamie xxoo]

Hairfail.jpg

Oh dear lol, I remember having hair sort of that colour after 5 days of swimming without washing it as a kid! I hope the re-dye worked out!

[alysonwheel]

Speaking of hair, mine has become far too long again* and summer's coming up. I'm debating whether to take it back to my shoulders or get something more radical done. Transgaf, what do you think?

*Please ignore horrible nightie in photo. It's so old and gross. Ugh.

[Jamie xxoo]

I'd just have any split ends cut off and get layers put in to lighten the weight. Long hair is lovely as long as it's got body!

[Hop]

Oh dear lol, I remember having hair sort of that colour after 5 days of swimming without washing it as a kid! I hope the re-dye worked out!

Yea, an hour with lots of lathering and a little heat did the trick. Still rather blue but a lot more even.

Kinda wish I got it the first time so I could get my nails done to match, but they didn't have the greatest purples selection anyway.

Also I'm in Boston now! (Cambridge right now technically, but still.)

[Femmeworth]

Speaking of hair, mine has become far too long again* and summer's coming up. I'm debating whether to take it back to my shoulders or get something more radical done. Transgaf, what do you think? *Please ignore horrible nightie in photo. It's so old and gross. Ugh.

I say don't cut it. Then again, I love long hair. >_>

[IceDoesntHelp]

Speaking of hair, mine has become far too long again* and summer's coming up. I'm debating whether to take it back to my shoulders or get something more radical done. Transgaf, what do you think? *Please ignore horrible nightie in photo. It's so old and gross. Ugh.

Honestly, it looks great! I wouldn't get rid of it ;_;