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Member
(06-02-2010, 07:08 AM)
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#52
I recently wrote one that was just under 600 words and about one hundred lines. When I say "recently," too, I mean all the poetry I've written in my adult life has been in the past two months. :lol I was still very much in a prose-y space so that was a very long poem.
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Member
(06-02-2010, 07:20 AM)
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#53
Originally Posted by Alfarif:
My line of work means I know the longest poem is -or going to be soon- the twitter poem. http://www.longestpoemintheworld.com/ info: http://www.telegraph.co.uk/technolog...n-Twitter.html But for a more non-automatic poem; I don't know really. Bhagavad Gita gets tossed around a bit. edit: Google brings up this: http://www.abc.net.au/news/newsitems...8/s1706896.htm It's a kilometer in length. :lol And "the blah story". Never heard of it myself. "The Blah Story, Volume 8" consists of one poem which contains 98,728 words; 449,441 characters (with spaces); 23,161 lines; 728 pages. http://www.1888pressrelease.com/the-...418v0y8hi.html credit: http://www.funtrivia.com/askft/Question3110.html There must be others. Edit 2: A while ago, we had a theme for the writing thread to write poetry but a tale of sorts, like beowolf or something. And as a side task from what I posted, I did say that I would try and find the long poem I had written. Can't remember If found it or not. But It had to have been around the 1800 mark. That was the word count requirement :lol
Last edited by Ashes1396; 06-02-2010 at 07:26 AM.
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Member
(06-02-2010, 05:57 PM)
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#54
Dream song hard. :( I have a draft, but... uh... I'm not even sure about it, much less whether or not it captures the associational flow of Berryman's work on even the poorest level.
Someone rock it out this time, please. I suck at setting secondary objectives! |
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Member
(06-02-2010, 06:06 PM)
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#55
What the hell, I might as well go on and post it, since somehow I don't think it's gonna change too much:
Chiggers: A Dream Song My legs still itch from walking in the park that muggy day. I knew the bugs would come for me, would crawl up my skirt, feast on my flesh, but with your hand glued to my hand, I was willing to sacrifice my skin. It has been one month. 32 days since our beginning. There was another day, and then a night, and another skirt, different grass, a different car, and we were together, but so distant, when all I wanted was to crawl into you, to feel the hard buzz of your chest and the sweat-stickiness of your hands. We had a seed then, unsprouted. Ungrown. It has been 12 years since that moment—our last. I always wore skirts for you, always so femme for you, on another day when we walked together, through the only patch of grass in Oklahoma. Sometimes we touched, and in those small, sour moments, I was alive with your sting. It has been sixteen years. So let the bites itch. I feel them all. |
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Member
(06-05-2010, 01:55 PM)
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Sandbox King
#59
Sandbox King
a dog barks a leaf falls the days change the night calls the sun shines then it hides all the kids have gone home but one kid is still present with a definite vision his aching hands reflect his constant digging despite the night's expedited approach the digging won't stop and the kid won't go a gas station sign that provides him with light flickers and flickers and flickers again but the flickering stops the morning sun grows and the sandbox king's got nowhere to go |
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Purple Drazi
(06-09-2010, 06:09 AM)
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#68
Originally Posted by Tim the Wiz:
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Member
(06-09-2010, 07:31 AM)
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#69
Feldman's made a fool of himself again
His honey bristling and rearing against the dark A simple smile betraying those poor old teeth To the plumes and lacerations of his dearest Interviewing the galaxies and lonely stars For a job: "One day, I'll buy a car, And pick a place and fly away. I wonder if they have minimum wage there I wonder why I anticipate a collision On unadopted highways, meandering in sandals I wonder why the wind is fresh at night I wonder why I trust this man with the directions I wonder if they take the fools like him Dreaming for a distant land To lay with friends and recuperate From a life made long with smoke and scars And thoughtless errands I know how long this man may have to live He has a history you know He killed a man because he could I wonder if they take the fools like him |
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This picture? uhh I can explain really!
(06-10-2010, 10:50 PM)
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#71
I wrote something I'm mildly happy with. I couldn't do the dream song bit... I tried, and I failed spectacularly. :lol Anyway, quoted bit below my entry is simply for context. I wrote that bit a long time ago, but never got around to actually finishing the story, so figured I'd do that during this challenge.
Second Movement of Discordia Part 2 Greater men than he had failed the tests; men of character And poise Greater men than he had met their end; men of import And strength Systems come and systems go, Men topple the lands they’ve known Unearthed and unloved; pushed ahead with angst ridden hands Even as “Discordiant” whims retire, and he is made to advance Even as the world turns to another, and he is not what he was He must cast off the past and become the mighty. “Leave the men to their own devices They will be remembered” Stratagem for the overturned and the unborn To begat the past, and unmake the future; to relish the chaotic motif Where they were birthed and left bare A nobility for a peasant, a right for a privilege He will undo it one step at a time. Conflict for the twilight end, bloodshed for the returned men Puzzled and overrun in the interim It never concludes; it forever cycles “Past, present, future, become the same in time; never a resolution” Still, there aren’t yet words for that which is unwritten; there is time enough for that And when liberation meets its makers The course will become his alone.
Quote:
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Member
(06-11-2010, 01:08 AM)
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#72
Epoch encroaching mass atrocity: The Rwandan Genocide.
Emotions lay wasted upon the cold concrete grass Shattered and torn, The bodies of the African orphan. Two hundred thousand cockroaches, stabbed, burnt, raped, pillaged and murdered. Six hundred thousand more by the end of it all. Raw is the detail, deafening is the sound. Cries are heard on the 17th page, On a two inch column, Behind that bloviated face; the modern front page. Crapulent is the media; tender is the aim. When the question spurts from the journalist's heart; Why is Washington not beating the streets? The congressman reports frankly, softly, about the calls she gets. Loud is the campaign to save the endangered Rwandan species. Less are the calls for people. Great is the movement, lost to another cause. Birds flutter in the cloudy sky, Covering the blue day, Leaving the brightness of the sun behind; I sit in the shade and grab a sock of earth, My eyes wild with fear, as the raging crowd approaches. If history teaches us anything. Never Forget. Never Again. |
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Member
(06-11-2010, 08:03 AM)
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What Have I Done?
#75
Maintain contact with society through bit roles and cameos.
Massive gain of notoriety by performing in donkey shows. Stand firmly against the rising tide of false humanity. Ignore the world before you utter cries of insanity. Shouts, stirs, and slurred words bring about the panic attack. Beating heart and heavy breaths, the perfect soundtrack. Crowds of foes hop from pub to bar to tavern. Hermit on the hill masks loneliness with paintings in the cavern. Walks down, into town and encounters the perpetrated hate. A shake of the head and a twitch of the hand more than enough to incriminate. Hustles forward, slamming into the mound of baiting flesh. Should have stayed at home, never meant to mesh. Rising from soot guarantees a constant cycle of second place. Can't say you'd be better off to never have entered the race. Hatred of hatred is the consumption of the self. Rage stored in a water bottle is never good for the health. Eventually, you'll find yourself giving up the reigns to the cockpit. By the way, I think this poem is about taking a massive shit.
Last edited by Irish; 06-11-2010 at 08:10 AM.
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Member
(06-12-2010, 01:58 AM)
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#76
Vuvuzela
The hive fills. Slowly, but surely, they arive in vibrant colour and costume. Drunk on the atmosphere that permeates the air. Hope, tinged with fear alive, vivacious brimming with anticipation. The hive erupts in sound as their champions emerge and the bees take up the call; BRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR ------------------------------------------------------ Also tried a secondary objective one, but I don't think I did it right :p Light flickers, sparking in and out of existance intermitant and irregular. Pupils contract hurridly, trying desperately to take in the scene. He turns, but for a moment and shadows dance, wreathed in the dim electric light. Deformed, grotesque wavering to and fro across the ruined wall. Rising, he stumbles on heedless of direction and emerges into twilight. The stars stare from above, their pure, empty gaze as cold as the night air. |
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Member
(06-12-2010, 04:59 AM)
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#77
Originally Posted by Bootaaay:
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FABULOUSLY
DIXI QUID QUID BEAR BEAR (06-12-2010, 05:00 AM)
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#78
Quote:
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Member
(06-12-2010, 08:40 AM)
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#79
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Member
(06-13-2010, 11:23 PM)
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#84
Bootaay, why you banned? :(
comments: kid ness: last stanza really makes this, in my opinion. In some of the other stanzas, I'm not sure the line breaks are optimal--not really building tension or pulling me along, I think. But starting with "flickers and flickers" -- so I guess the last six lines -- things are just fantastic. Plumbob: I wish this had a title simply because I'm damned curious as to what you'd call it. How you'd focus or direct it, if you will, because that's all that really "missing" here, to me. Nice work. Alfarif: I almost wish you hadn't posted the "context" one, because I like it better! I think picking up and continuing something you've worked on before (or writing a second part, I mean) makes for a nice double layer on the theme. As for this piece, I like the occasional subtle rhymes a lot. I just think that older one trumps it, me. Ashes1396 (why that number?): Heavy. Really like a lot of what you did here with language (e.g. "sock of earth"). Think you could do a lot of little editing with punctuation and line breaks here to make this even stronger, though. Obviously excellent work on theme! Irish: I effin' snorted over that last line. Hilarious. Interesting work on theme. Boooooootaaaaaaay: I'm glad I looked up "vuvuzela." I guess if I was a soccer fan, I'd have already known! But knowing that gives this a lot more depth, obviously! Don't really like the actual rendering of the sound, but love the rest. Boootaaaaaay the second: No worries, dude; I've been looking up other peoples' dream songs and I don't think anyone did it "right" except Berryman himself. :P But I think you caught the ruminative (I still dunno if that's a word) nature here. Strong beginning and end. Nice images. votes: 1. Bootaay the second (though it was tough picking between the two) 2. Plumbob 3. Ashes1396 Really liked all the subs this time, guys. Wish more of you had written. Sorry if the theme didn't get you kicking and screaming. But really, really happy with what did turn up. You guys are killer. I'm displeased with mine and will probably rewrite it out of form, but I'm glad I tried something different (sorta....) |
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This picture? uhh I can explain really!
(06-14-2010, 01:45 AM)
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#85
All right there are two sets of votes here: my wife and then mine. Her account is Alliekat and she didn't feel like logging in. If I can't do that, she'll log in to post them herself.
Alliekat: 1)Ashes1396 2)hey_monkey 3)Alfarif Alfarif: 1)Ashes1396 2)hey_monkey 3)Bootaaay- Vuvuzela |
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This picture? uhh I can explain really!
(06-14-2010, 02:03 AM)
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#86
Originally Posted by hey_monkey:
I don't know if anyone will care, but these two pieces are connected to the one I wrote in the "Interior" poetry challenge. A nobility for a peasant, a right for a privilege, from the second part, and Nobility's flown and I seek your wisdom to seek her out Girl's azure eyes, the boy's stones of gray, from the first one are actually references to the girl and boy, specifically these lines: It would always be he, the boy with the contagious smile and eyes of slate To match her calm azure and For her people need her, and the war will never end unless she takes her station. She takes her mantle, and steps into the unknown. Sumalis is visited by an "angel" of sorts that tells him to lead the girl in the other poem to safety. Sumalis, however, is leading a group of men known as the "Discordiants" into battle, and he doesn't want to leave his men. He tells the angel to give him three days to complete his task before he departs. |
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Member
(06-14-2010, 04:53 AM)
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#88
Originally Posted by Alfarif:
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Member
(06-14-2010, 03:11 PM)
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#89
votes:
1. Kid ness 2. Bootaay - secondary objective 3. plumbob I think we should extend it for a bit and let some users get their votes in. paging plumbob. I haven't counted the votes yet but you have a few nominations I think. ps. Alfarif posting votes from his significant other is perfectly fine with me. |
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Member
(06-16-2010, 09:15 PM)
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#90
Okay! We got a little messed up by E3 and I'm really not sure how we should proceed with the new thread. Here are the results as I calculated them:
Ashes1396: 13 Bootaaay (second): 6 hey_monkey: 6 kid ness: 5 Plumbob: 5 Irish: 5 Alfarif: 4 Bootaay (first): 1 Wish we'd seen more people voting, but I expect it might still have been a runaway victory for Ashes1396. Good job, man! Now you get to decide how to handle challenge interruption. :lol |
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Member
(06-17-2010, 12:23 AM)
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#93
If the ops given it to me, then I'll accept I guess. :lol
I could have sworn it was between Plumbob, bootaay and Hey_Monkey. New thread should be up soon. A big thank you to everyone who participated. :p edit: The new thread is up folks, here.
Last edited by Ashes1396; 06-17-2010 at 01:21 AM.
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