[Magnus]

A page late and all that, but is exploring some potential shared hobbies/interests/tastes not an option? You stress some degree of commonality in that regard, but earlier on you noted that you basically have one night of experience with the fellow. Could you perhaps be writing the book on this guy before you're even a chapter in?

I definitely am, though I base that on a ton of chatting (text/SMS) over the last year or so, aside from the one night. I really do feel as if I can read the man well, in that regard.

But yeah, you're right. I need (and want!) to spend some time with him in situations I know won't get out of control (and lead to sex or romance), and just hang, enjoy each others' company, and see what's there. I just hate having to find a way to make it clear that I just want to hang (with my mind totally open to more!), instead of labeling it a 'date' right off the bat, which he seems eager to do. A 'date' automatically has a pile of expectations for either party. Or both.

[SaintZ]

what's your city/country? sounds like a thing with white guys, that's what I am suspecting at least. my problem is also that when I see a picture, I know I will like that guy, speaking about sexual attraction only, I very very rarely change my mind upon meeting and that only happens when the pictures were too old. these guys all sent me icons like "Interesting" "Cute" sometimes even "hot" and they don't make their move! I am the one liking them in the end and they just play the "yeah, no, don't know" card. you are right in the second bolded, the guy from yesterday was a 6 feet tall redhead, very cute and friendly, a tiny bit effemniate and I suspect he might have been waiting for the man (me) to bring him to bed :D...

I am mexican too :lol but I'm in Mexico City. Maybe you should just go out with a different mindset and it might be less frustrating. I always go out thinking about wanting to meet new people in this city so I have not been picky with the guys I've been dating. I usually like nerdy guys around my age (26) but for some reason I have a lot of "luck" with thirty-something guys. lol.

[Magnus]

So, memory lane with old vids today. Sean Cody & I were basically in a long term relationship.

[Delio]

I added a porn star I really like onto twitter. (Chase young) Had a nice convo with him and he was really nice. He really is adorable...but Helix keeps pushing him into these dungeon sets lately with skinnier guys and more spank stuff.

Ah well nothing beat watching him do the cinnamon challenge :)

[electroplankton]

I added a porn star I really like onto twitter. (Chase young) Had a nice convo with him and he was really nice. He really is adorable...but Helix keeps pushing him into these dungeon sets lately with skinnier guys and more spank stuff. Ah well nothing beat watching him do the cinnamon challenge :)

Always wondered how the sexual life of a porn star might be.

[sphinx]

after longass messages with another guy I've never met (and never will cause I am disappointed already), I asked for his last name, of course giving mine in the same sentence.

he got all worked up saying "why the hell is that important?! I don't even know you!, we haven't had a telephone call! if we ever meet I can tell you."

I answered calmly and friendly but I actually thought "fuck this", am I wrong? I am not sure now but that's what I thought.

[dragonlife]

Stick to first names. Asking for a last name early on can be a bit much.

[sphinx]

Stick to first names. Asking for a last name early on can be a bit much.

might be but it's the sum of all the parts that disappoints me... if he's is so freaking scared of sharing any real info with anyone, how are we supposed to get to know each other?

example, he said he had a small tatoo in his right forearm, I asked what design he had and ignored the question.

then, His stats doesn't match the pictures cause he looks fit in them but according to the stats he has some overweight. I ask (very friendly and polite and all) for a pic with his current appearance and I get "yeah, somtime down the line"...

I mean... come on. he already has a minus point by smoking and lives like, don't know, hours away from here...

he is a kind guy, but I truly believe he is doing it wrong.

[SaintZ]

Well, asking for the last name isn't a big deal, just a little bit unusual. The guy overreacted IMO. If you're not feeling the guy this early don't waste your time.

[Mr_Zombie]

I send a SMS saying, " Maybe I should have offered you my bed" (cause he looked tired) and what is his answer to the message? "It was nice that we had an exchange of ideas and a nice chat and that hug when I went home was nice"... THE FUCK??? what is that for an answer??? I expect " NO, I won't go to your bed, neither alone or with you" or " Yeah, would have been nice, maybe later on". Am I wrong? I'd like some help here cause I don't understand these guys.

Guy without an experience here, but aren't you a little bit straightforward? You were expecting him to either jump to your bed or say "fuck you!" and consider everything in-between as something bad. It's the first date and of course some people will be a little bit awkward and undecided whether they want to spent the rest of the life (or at least night) with you or leave you forever alone. It doesn't mean they don't like you; maybe those guys just can't easily define and/or express their feelings or are simply shy.

[Prez]

I send a SMS saying, " Maybe I should have offered you my bed" (cause he looked tired) and what is his answer to the message? "It was nice that we had an exchange of ideas and a nice chat and that hug when I went home was nice"... THE FUCK??? what is that for an answer??? I expect " NO, I won't go to your bed, neither alone or with you" or " Yeah, would have been nice, maybe later on".

If I got a message saying "maybe I should have offered you my bed" I wouldn't know what to say and I'd answer something like that too. It's a weird thing to say.

Everything you said so far makes it seem like you're only after sex. That may not be the case, but it's probably what you make your dates think.

[Masamuna]

Asking for a last name isn't weird at all, I'm not sure if its a recent thing with smart phones or what but everyone I know is pretty keen on keeping their contact lists organized.

I have about half a dozen Jasons, 8 shawns and multiples of other names as well in my phone at the moment. Unless your first name is very unique (like Balmafuma or Radamanthus unique) I'm going to ask for your surname. There's really nothing to it.

In other news I'm really tempted on ordering a cock sling. And I guess if I don't like it i'm sure my BF will give it a go (the leather cock ring I got a few months ago looks AMAZING on him).

[TheSeks]

Maybe I'm not hip, but what the hell is a cock sling?

[Bo]

Maybe I'm not hip, but what the hell is a cock sling?

You use it to put out the eyes of giants?

Little known fact: David ran out of rocks.

[TheSeks]

You use it to put out the eyes of giants? Little known fact: David ran out of rocks.

I'm still not following that image.

[Delio]

Always wondered how the sexual life of a porn star might be.

I didn't want to ask him that but I do wonder myself. I mean if your in sex videos all the time how does that go? I know Brent Everett married a guy in the porn industry and the guy still films him getting fucked by other guys.

[Bo]

I'm still not following that image.

A sling is to stones as a cock sling is to...

Dammit, do I have to wait for Replicant here?!

[TheSeks]

Er... uh...?

You mean semen?

[Bo]

A classical sling hurled kinetic projectiles (ie stones) at targets, typically for hunting or warfare. The David and Goliath fable is one such depiction. The double entendres were perfect you bastard, PERFECT.

*shakes fist*

[AceBandage]

Hehe, cock sling.

[red_13th]

So, memory lane with old vids today. Sean Cody & I were basically in a long term relationship.

Sean Cody has this new dude, Harrison I think, who's ridiculously hot. He does wrestling videos too in a site called Thunder's Arena, my boyfriend really likes that site. I don't care about guys wrestling when there's no naughty bits but Harrison is hot.

[RatskyWatsky]

A cock sling is a cock ring with "added benefits" so says amazon.

[BeesEight]

A classical sling hurled kinetic projectiles (ie stones) at targets, typically for hunting or warfare. The David and Goliath fable is one such depiction. The double entendres were perfect you bastard, PERFECT. *shakes fist*

Don't worry, Botolf, I got the joke. I smirked a little.

[Tess3ract]

Cocks are amazing.

[AceBandage]

Cocks are amazing.

Sometimes quite troublesome.

[TheSeks]

Man, Googling Michael Fassbender's shame clips isn't turning up the goods for me after learning about this film on Top Gear. WOE.

[dragonlife]

Man, Googling Michael Fassbender's shame clips isn't turning up the goods for me after learning about this film on Top Gear. WOE.

Haha. I did the same thing and was disappointed. I guess I'll have to watch the movie.

[Delio]

Cocks are amazing.

Asses are awesome.

[SaintZ]

Man, Googling Michael Fassbender's shame clips isn't turning up the goods for me after learning about this film on Top Gear. WOE.

Watching the movie at the cinema was GLORIOUS. Why is he so perfect? :(

[CHEEZMO™]

Asses are awesome.

Chests are best.

[TheSeks]

Watching the movie at the cinema was GLORIOUS. Why is he so perfect? :(

Too bad I don't have Netflix.

SHOW ME THE GOODS, GOOGLE. GODDAMN IT.

[Delio]

Chests are best.

Feet are sweet.

[Bel Marduk]

Feet are sweet.

I agree.. very much so.

[SaintZ]

Too bad I don't have Netflix. SHOW ME THE GOODS, GOOGLE. GODDAMN IT.

I googled "fassbender in shame gif" and found a GIF of the opening scene of the movie. Fassbender and his long... torso. It's not a video but better than a screencap.

[TheSeks]

I googled "fassbender in shame gif" and found a GIF of the opening scene of the movie. Fassbender and his long... torso. It's not a video but better than a screencap.

Hohohoho, I love you like Magneto loves Professor X right now. <3

[SaintZ]

Hohohoho, I love you like Magneto loves Professor X right now. <3

<3

[BeesEight]

Eyes are nice.

[_Isaac]

I feel like he's been a tad bit overexposed in the past year. It might just be GAF's continuous hard-on for him though.

[hateradio]

I like the guy holding him, better. :p

[TheSeks]

I feel like he's been a tad bit overexposed in the past year. It might just be GAF's continuous hard-on for him though.

I didn't even know who he was until Top Gear was on BBC America tonight. :x

He's not good looking, but I had to see him after Clarkson makes mention of him being nude for 2+ hours in Shame.

Plus I can't hate an (half-)Irishman.


OH HEY DRAGONLIFE: Are you getting VF5:FS on PS3? :x

[Icicle]

I'm not at all comfortable with the fact my little Boto is aware of sex toys I've never even heard about.

And I thought you were innocent...

[TheSeks]

I still don't know what a cock sling is. What the hell is "extra" on a cockring!?

[Bo]

*laughs*

I've no idea of how the actual device functions, actually (or even what it looks like). Probably helped make the mental image of someone slinging a penis at a giant's forehead all the more amusing.

[RatskyWatsky]

I still don't know what a cock sling is. What the hell is "extra" on a cockring!?

It's a cock ring with a "tongue" that messages your perineum.

[Necromanti]

Whatever it is, it doesn't look very comfortable...

[sphinx]

Guy without an experience here, but aren't you a little bit straightforward? You were expecting him to either jump to your bed or say "fuck you!" and consider everything in-between as something bad. It's the first date and of course some people will be a little bit awkward and undecided whether they want to spent the rest of the life (or at least night) with you or leave you forever alone. It doesn't mean they don't like you; maybe those guys just can't easily define and/or express their feelings or are simply shy.

agreed on all this, I do am a bit straightforward but I can't think of anything wrong with that. In fact, I'd be thankful if I were a shy guy if the other one gave me a hand by asking for stuff.

If I got a message saying "maybe I should have offered you my bed" I wouldn't know what to say and I'd answer something like that too. It's a weird thing to say. Everything you said so far makes it seem like you're only after sex. That may not be the case, but it's probably what you make your dates think.

I am into knowing people better and that includes sex and ask for last names. If people don't want sex early on, it's fine I don't demand it the first date even though I may want to or maybe ask in some way for it. If they don't want it at all with me, it's fine I can take it.

If they are going to get all offended and feel awkward because I express sexual or affective interest, then they are timewasters and I am happy if they run away from me, don't really want to deal with them.

[DR2K]

What's good first date gay ettiqute?

[i_am_ben]

What's good first date gay ettiqute?

I'm not sure, however here are two tips gaygaffers always make:

1) Thinking that a Grindr hookup is a date

or

2) Getting upset when they don't have sex on the first date

[Magnus]

You mean, don't do those two things? Because then I'd agree. lol

[Coppertracks]

What's good first date gay ettiqute?

Don't have sex.

Don't get absolutely wasted.

Don't blabber on about your ex's (nobody wants to hear about them), your personal problems/family issues.

Do smile, seem confident and pay lots of interest to the other person.