[Lissar]

Boobs look like oranges. I never would have guessed.

[Femmeworth]

Boobs look like oranges. I never would have guessed.

Looks more like grapefruit.

[Mecha_Infantry]

Ladies, heeeeeey!

Anyway on a serious note I'm asking for some info on under eye cream. I don't have bags as such, like from a lack is sleep but it's generally thin skin. I find when I am holding weight (I do bodybuilding some some months I'm bigger than I usually am) my cheeks get fatter and the lack of fat under my eyes makes my bags seem heavier. But when I thin out the bags aren't as apparent, but are still there.

Anyway, is there any under eye cream that can make the skin look a little thicker? Or less tired in general. I'm a black male so I don't have black circle, just bags :(

Thanks!

[shanshan310]

Actually I wanna know this too. I sometimes use concealer but it doesn't help much. I'm pretty pale so the bags tend to stand out a bit, depending on the lighting and their size on any given day.

[Inanna]

You can't really do much about the sunken eye problem apart from resorting to cosmetic surgery. But you could use some eye creams that would slightly plump up the under eye skin and well moisturise it so it won't look as bad.

[Emitan]

Why would you ruin boobs with your science?

[Mecha_Infantry]

You can't really do much about the sunken eye problem apart from resorting to cosmetic surgery. But you could use some eye creams that would slightly plump up the under eye skin and well moisturise it so it won't look as bad.

I moisturises daily with Cocoa butter. But I guess I will find a proper under eye cream

Any recommendations??

[Inanna]

I use Boots No 7 protect and perfect intense eye cream (only available in the UK) it does a bit of everything; reduces fine lines, puffyness, lightens the dark circles, moisturises and plumps up the area. I don't get puffiness or have fine lines but I have hereditary dark circles and a bit of sunken eye problem myself.

I'm not really sure what other creams you could get but maybe watch this video and get a cream that has the ingredients that she mentions are good for undereye skin.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxP1msXNrf0

EDIT: I also quite like THIS video that explains the main causes and treatments for puffiness and bags around the eyes.

[Mecha_Infantry]

I use Boots No 7 protect and perfect intense eye cream (only available in the UK) it does a bit of everything; reduces fine lines, puffyness, lightens the dark circles, moisturises and plumps up the area. I don't get puffiness or have fine lines but I have hereditary dark circles and a bit of sunken eye problem myself. I'm not really sure what other creams you could get but maybe watch this video and get a cream that has the ingredients that she mentions are good for undereye skin. http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lxP1msXNrf0

Thanks

I'm in London so I'll check some our in Boots tomorrow

[Ezalc]

[img]http://images.medicinenet.com/images/illustrations/anatomy_breast.jpg[img]

Yes I realize that boobs are basically just bags of fat.

[Devolution]

Yes I realize that boobs are basically just bags of fat.

Then what was your point.

[Ezalc]

Then what was your point.

Just disregard the question, congratulations on your new cup promotion.

[BladeWorker]

Here, you can have some of mine. *pulls off blobs of fat*

And here I thought diet and exercise was the only way to get rid of fat. Man, if I could just chop it off...

[shanshan310]

And here I thought diet and exercise was the only way to get rid of fat. Man, if I could just chop it off...

I dunno about chopping it off, but if I could re position it that would be amazing.

[FallingEdge]

Do more squats!

[BladeWorker]

Do more squats!

You know as well as I do that squats don't rid your entire body of fat.

If they did, my 150lb squat sets on the universal would leave me looking like Jem.

[shanshan310]

Do more squats!

But I am lazy.

[FallingEdge]

You know as well as I do that squats don't rid your entire body of fat. If they did, my 150lb squat sets on the universal would leave me looking like Jem.

!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Of course diet is the biggest issue but squats will help form dat ass. For some reason, I was picturing that you (or other women for that matter) wanted to move the fat around to the ass. I don't know why, it was just the first thing that popped in my head.

But I am lazy.

;_;

[Dai101]

If they did, my 150lb squat sets on the universal would leave me looking like Jem.

Outrageous

[Inanna]

Someone posted one of youtube videos by femistfrequency in some topic on GAF and I'm glad that they did because I'm loving her videos. Love THIS video. Definitely agree with her and I see it everywhere. Makes talking to people about women's right that much more difficult and frustrating.

[Devolution]

Yeah I mostly read stuff that's about specific policies these days. Americuh is really great when it comes to women lately =/.

[cloudwalking]

i hate to steer the conversation back towards boobs (actually i don't) but i just had to share this amazing article:

12 Problems Busty Girls Have

this really got me loling... all of it is so true. the seatbelt thing is the worst, hate riding in a car because of it. where AM i supposed to put the damn strap? nothing is comfortable.

and don't get me started on the clothing-related ones. anything with a built in bra gets a lol out of me, too, and i just don't buy anything with ruffles as much as i'd like to. and wearing a bag with cross-body shoulder straps... yeah that's inviting more than a few stares.

[shanshan310]

haha, with regard to the suspenders one ("I don't think they had bustiness in mind") I don't think they had breasts in mind at all when it was made :p


If you have smaller boobs, would ruffles make them look bigger or smaller, I wonder...

[Lissar]

Never had any of those problems, except maybe the stairs one. :D

[H.Protagonist]

haha, with regard to the suspenders one ("I don't think they had bustiness in mind") I don't think they had breasts in mind at all when it was made :p If you have smaller boobs, would ruffles make them look bigger or smaller, I wonder...

I've tried the ruffle thing with a new shirt I got because I'd seen smaller-chested women wearing them to, er, highlight that area, but in the end I just felt like this:

[RawPower]

I've tried the ruffle thing with a new shirt I got because I'd seen smaller-chested women wearing them to, er, highlight that area, but in the end I just felt like this:

Ha, gnarly.

[Inanna]

Never had any of those problems, except maybe the stairs one. :D

Yeah the stair one for me as well. I never had any problem with the car/bag straps because the bras I wear are so good and push boobs together instead of creating space in the middle between the boobs where the strap can dig into. A lot of underwired bras have that problem and I never use them.

[Leeness]

12 Problems Busty Girls Have

Lmao, I just saw that yesterday and it was like... wow. This is my life. Every single thing is truuuuuue.

[The Anti-Monitor]

Stairs are a bitch.

[Femmeworth]

12 Problems Busty Girls Have

Well, I'm glad I'll never have any of those problems. >_>

[Emitan]

Stairs are a bitch.

They make you grope yourself?

I kid, I know what's up

[The Anti-Monitor]

They make you grope yourself? I kid, I know what's up

On more than one occasion... it's kinda embarrassing when you have to go fast.

[shanshan310]

Well, I'm glad I'll never have any of those problems. >_>

The only one I've had is knocking stuff over, but that only happens in certain bras.

[Lissar]

I'm usually pretty aware of where my chest is, so I don't knock things over with that.

My wayward arms though? Yes. ._. I have no idea where those things get to.

[Kazerei]

i hate to steer the conversation back towards boobs (actually i don't) but i just had to share this amazing article: 12 Problems Busty Girls Have this really got me loling... all of it is so true. the seatbelt thing is the worst, hate riding in a car because of it. where AM i supposed to put the damn strap? nothing is comfortable. and don't get me started on the clothing-related ones. anything with a built in bra gets a lol out of me, too, and i just don't buy anything with ruffles as much as i'd like to. and wearing a bag with cross-body shoulder straps... yeah that's inviting more than a few stares.

Camisoles with built-in bras are totally meant for small chested girls. They're great, btw!

[Ducky_McGee]

Tmi question incoming but before I ask a doctor ill ask you.

Up until recently sex wasn't a problem at all from the stand point of that I was able to get excited and we didn't ever really need lube, with a few exceptions. Every once in a while it might just help so we had some on hand. It was fine... We had three kinds. Something called ky silk-e which was my favorite, normal liquid, and some watermelon flavored stuff that I didn't care for because it got sticky. This is important for later on...

And a few weeks ago I got a yeast infection. I tried monostat one day and after that didn't work I tried three day. Then I got a pill from my doctor that cleared it right up. Except now when I'm having sex I have a really hard time getting lubricated naturally. I've never had this problem before and I figured it was just a side effect to the medication. So we stepped up our lube usage.

Then a couple weeks ago or so I get on the pill Reclipsen. Birth control. I'm still having trouble producing enough of my own lubrication except now I have a new problem. The lube that was just fine before now causes a really intense burning sensation that makes me feel like me vagina is on fire. The water melon one doesn't burn but the ky one does where it didn't before.

So does anyone have any insight as to what might be going on?

[Darkatomz]

I don't have an answer to your problems Ducky, but if you ever solve the problem, everything that I've read in my research would indicate that KY sucks ass. If you're going to stick with water-based lube, check out ID Glide.

My guess is that it's just some chemical.

[Devolution]

So I've been reading Guyland, I really recommend it for anyone who wants to read up on the college age middle class demographic of men and what's going on with them. Feminist lit and studies tend to get wrapped up in what's going on with us and we don't really get a good overview of how men get the shaft from outdated modes of thinking. It's informative, truthfully depressing but very insightful.

[timetokill]

So I've been reading Guyland, I really recommend it for anyone who wants to read up on the college age middle class demographic of men and what's going on with them. Feminist lit and studies tend to get wrapped up in what's going on with us and we don't really get a good overview of how men get the shaft from outdated modes of thinking. It's informative, truthfully depressing but very insightful.

I remember reading the post on Jezebel about the book and the comments were depressing as hell. I think that Feminist lit/studies really needs to add some focus/perspective to the male side of the equation. It would help men feel like Feminist stuff isn't only for women, and also help women understand some of the issues men are going through as a more feminist worldview spreads. I've only read some snippets from Guyland, hopefully I'll be able to read more of it sometime.

So thanks for your comment, and enough outta me.

[RawPower]

I remember reading the post on Jezebel about the book and the comments were depressing as hell. I think that Feminist lit/studies really needs to add some focus/perspective to the male side of the equation. It would help men feel like Feminist stuff isn't only for women, and also help women understand some of the issues men are going through as a more feminist worldview spreads. I've only read some snippets from Guyland, hopefully I'll be able to read more of it sometime. So thanks for your comment, and enough outta me.

I haven't looked at it yet, but I have a feeling I'm in for something very unpleasant. D:

[Dax01]

So I've been reading Guyland, I really recommend it for anyone who wants to read up on the college age middle class demographic of men and what's going on with them. Feminist lit and studies tend to get wrapped up in what's going on with us and we don't really get a good overview of how men get the shaft from outdated modes of thinking. It's informative, truthfully depressing but very insightful.

Care to summarize?

[Brian Griffin]

I don't have an answer to your problems Ducky, but if you ever solve the problem, everything that I've read in my research would indicate that KY sucks ass. If you're going to stick with water-based lube, check out ID Glide. My guess is that it's just some chemical.

Astroglide is another great water based one that has never let my wife and I down.

Ducky, I don't own a vagina but I've lived with a woman who does for almost 10 years and we've gone through similar issues. My guess is that the infection, medication for it, and then getting on the pill has screwed up your vagina's ecosystem of bacteria and might just take some time to reset. You should still see a doctor but in my experience these sorta problems work themselves out eventually.

[Devolution]

Care to summarize?

Um a lot of the talk revolves around the Guy Code and just how insidious this mode of thinking happens to be. The Guy Code of course being stuff like "bros before hos", "real men don't cry", "you need to be a stud", etc. We all think these things are just caricatures or extremes but they carry a much larger burden then we're willing to accept and decry. I actually finished it today on the bus and want to retread it.

Here are some passages that describe the book's aim and direction:

It's easy to observe "guys" virtually everywhere in America–in every high school and college campus in America with their baseball caps on frontward or backward, their easy smiles or anxious darting eyes, huddled around tiny electronic gadgets or laptops, or relaxing in front of massive wide-screen hi-def TVs, in basements, dorms and frat houses. But it would be a mistake to assume that each conforms fully to a regime of peer-influenced and enforced behaviors that I call the "Guy Code," or shares all traits and attitudes with everyone else. It's important to remember that individual guys are not the same as "Guyland." In fact my point is precisely the opposite. Though Guyland is pervasive–it is the air guys breathe, the water they drink–each guy cuts his own deal with it as he ties to navigate the passage from adolescence to adulthood without succumbing to the most soul-numbing spirit crushing elements that surround him every day. Guys often feel they're entirely on their own as they navigate the murky shadows and the dangerous eddies that run in Guyland's swift current. They often stop talking to their parents, who "just don't get it." Other adults seem equally clueless. And they can't confide in one another lest they risk being exposed for the confused creatures they are. So they're left alone, confused, trying to come to terms with a world they themselves barely understand. They couch their insecurity in bravado and bluster, a fearless strut barely concealing a tremulous anxiety. They test themselves in fantasy worlds and in drinking contests, enduring humiliation and pain at the hands of others. All the while, many do suspect that something's rotten in the state of Manhood. They struggle to conceal their own sense of fraudulence and can smell it on others. But few can admit to it, lest all the emperors-to-be will be revealed as disrobed. They go along, in mime. Just as one can support the troops but oppose the war, so too can one appreciate and support individual guys while engaging critically with the social and cultural world they inhabit. In fact I believe that only by understanding this world can we truly be empathetic to the guy in our lives. We need to enter this world, see the perilous field in which boys become men in our society because we desperately need to start a conversation about that world. We do boys a great disservice by turning away, excusing the excesses of Guyland as just "boys will be boys"–because we fail to see just how powerful its influence really is. Only when we begin to engage in these conversations, with open eyes and open hearts–as parents to children, as friends, as themselves–can we both reduce the risks and enable guys to navigate it more successfully. This book is an attempt to map that terrain in order to enable guys–and those who know them, care about them, love them–to steer a course with greater integrity and honesty, so they can be true not to some artificial code, but to themselves.

Whenever I ask young women what they think it means to be a woman, they look at me puzzled and say, basically, "Whatever I want." "It doesn't mean anything at all to me," says Nicole, a junior at Colby College in Maine. "I can be Mia Hamm, I can be Britney Spears, I can be Madame Curie or Madonna. Nobody can tell me what it means to be a woman anymore." For men, the question is still meaningful–and powerful. In countless workshops on college campuses and in high-school assemblies, I've asked young men what it means to be a man. I've asked guys from every state in the nation, as well as about fifteen other countries what sort of phrases and words come to mind when they hear someone say, "Be a man!" The responses are rather predictable. The first thing someone usually says is "Don't cry," the other similar phrases and ideas–never show your feelings, never ask for directions, never give up, never give in, be strong, be aggressive, show no fear, show no mercy, get rich, get even, get laid, win–follow easily after that. Here's what guys say, summarized into a set of current epigrams, Think of it as a "Real Guy's Top Ten List." 1. Boys don't cry 2. It's better to be mad than sad 3. Don't get mad–get even 4. Take it like a man 5. He who has the most toys when he dies, wins 6. Just do it or Ride or Die 7. Size matters 8. I don't stop to ask for directions 9. Nice guys finish last 10. It's all good The unifying emotional subtext of all these aphorisms involves never showing emotions or admitting to weakness. The face you must show to the world insists that everything is going just fine, that everything is under control, that there's nothing to be concerned about (a contemporary version of Alfred E. Neuman of MAD Magazine's "What, me worry?"). Winning is crucial, especially when the victory is over other men who lave less amazing or smaller toys. Kindness is not an option, nor is compassion. These sentiments are taboo. This is "The Guy Code", the collection of attitudes, values and traits that together composes what it means to be a man. These are rules that govern the behavior in Guyland, the criteria that will be used to evaluate whether any particular guy measures up. The Guy Code revisits what psychologist Willian Pollack called "the boy code" in his best selling book Real Boys–just a couple of years older and with a lot more at stake. And just as Pollack and others have explored the dynamics of boyhood so well, we now need to end the reach of that analysis to include late adolescence and young adulthood. In 1976, social psychologist Robert Brannon summarized the four basic rules of masculinity: 1. "No Sissy Stuff!" Being a man means not being a sissy, not being perceived as weak, effeminate or gay. Masculinity is the relentless repudiation of the feminine. 2. "Be a Big Wheel." This rule refers to the centrality of success and power in the definition of masculinity. Masculinity is measured more by wealth, power and status than by any particular body part. 3. "Be a Sturdy Oak." What makes a man is that he is reliable in a crisis. And what makes him so reliable in a crisis is not that he is able to respond fully and appropriately to the situation at hand, but rather that he resemble an inanimate object. A rock, a pillar, a species of tree. 4. "Give 'Em Hell." Exude an aura of daring and aggression. Live life out on the edge. Take risks. Go for it. Pay no attention to what others think. Amazingly, these four rules have changed very little among successive generations of high-school and college age men. James O'Niel, a developmental psychologist at the University of Connecticut, and Joseph Pleck, a social psychologist at the University of Illinois, have each been conducting studies of this normative definition of masculinity for decades. "One of the most surprising findings," O'Neil told me, "is how little the rules have changed."

[EviLore]

That's an interesting topic and probably deserves its own thread.

These definitions of masculinity as so pervasive as to feel hard-coded, really, but they're clearly exclusionary and outmoded, too. How do we say "being a man is about conquering desirable women and not having feelings and beating people up" and simultaneously say that there's nothing wrong with being gay or to be able to express yourself how you want? The concepts are at odds. This is how you have situations like a father being disappointed in his son for being incapable of fulfilling masculine ideals.

[Emitan]

That's an interesting topic and probably deserves its own thread. These definitions of masculinity as so pervasive as to feel hard-coded, really, but they're clearly exclusionary and outmoded, too. How do we say "being a man is about conquering desirable women and not having feelings and beating people up" and simultaneously say that there's nothing wrong with being gay or to be able to express yourself how you want? The concepts are at odds. This is how you have situations like a father being disappointed in his son for being incapable of fulfilling masculine ideals.

The worst part about them is you can't really reject them without feeling completely isolated. Show too much emotion? Other men start to disrespect you. Even women seem to expect men to follow this code to some degree, although I guess that's not really different from the expectations of femininity men have for women.

[Devolution]

I'll make a thread then since it's probably more pertinent outside of this one and kind of ironic I'm saying we should talk more about this while I post it in girlgaf.

[Professor Beef]

I really do hate that "guy code." I got the "don't be a sissy" stuff from my dad all the time.

[Emitan]

I really do hate that "guy code." I got the "don't be a sissy" stuff from my dad all the time.

It's because you won't play Fire Emblem :P

I stopped really caring what my dad thought when I was a little kid. Jeeze, sorry I'm not a competitive asshole, Dad. I'll stop disappointing you by being nice? What the hell is that?

[Devolution]

It's because you won't play Fire Emblem :P I stopped really caring what my dad thought when I was a little kid. Jeeze, sorry I'm not a competitive asshole, Dad. I'll stop disappointing you by being nice? What the hell is that?

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=470612

Please talk about it there if you'd be so kind. Before it gets messy.

[BladeWorker]

http://www.neogaf.com/forum/showthread.php?t=470612 Please talk about it there if you'd be so kind. Before it gets messy.

Can we talk about the female equivalent here? Because I saw a passage that you quoted from the book - about girls and women who describe being a woman as "whatever they want" and I'm not sure that's really true.

I mean, the cosmetics industry wouldn't be a multi-billion dollar pull, nor would cosmetic surgery, nor would anorexia and bulimia be as significant issues as they are among girls and women if we really can "be whomever we want".

There's a bit of a debate in Ontario right now about gender selection among pregnant women - those who are opting to abort the fetus on the basis that their baby will be female - and how some hospitals, particularly in the GTA, do not disclose gender from ultrasounds. Notably, they have this policy because it's beyond a technician's scope of practice to do so, really, but now there is commentary that they're ultrasensitive to this because of gender selection.

In this environment, girls feeling so liberated is fantastic - but I don't believe that it's true. Simply because marketing of what it means to be a woman is so successfully subtle that we don't notice that it's there, does not mean that it does not exist, nor does it mean that it has no impact on how girls and women see themselves.

And there is, in many circles, a girl code that echoes the bro code, which defines social norms for girls and women - in essence, no matter who we are or what status we hold, we must obey the code. Don't sleep with another girl's man. Don't wear miniskirts after 35.

For discussion, and not necessarily because I believe that it's true, I posit: As developed society has matured, we have taken old notions of the social contract and updated it to include gendered perspectives.

My $0.02. If I'm out of scope here, happy to edit and re-post elsewhere.