[Etrian Oddity]

Your attitude is great. You understand that it's your own fault, which also means you can fix it. Don't dwell in the past, but instead start throwing yourself in situations where you got to be social. You'll mess up a few times, but don't let that discourage you. Like everything you'll learn through practice.

This. :)

You really only improve by putting yourself in those situations...sucks, but practice makes perfect.

I'm getting better at cold approaches. My ice-breakers go pretty well, and even my really experienced friends say they think it's my late game rather than my early game that ruins things for me.

It just sucks because I was homeschooled and a very late bloomer. Things guys learned to navigate at 14 are what I'm learning at 23...there's just nothing to be done other than force myself to learn the ropes and figure things out the hard way (eg trial and error).

I need to be quicker on my feet, though. Often I'll open up a window for myself even with sexy girls, but it closes because my inexperience rears its head. Just today at the pool I said fuck it and approached a total hottie and made small talk, and she asked what I was doing tonight. In true virgin fashion I was taken aback and fumbled my chance away, but don't think I won't force myself to bullshit a response next time a girl asks.

Improvement is a tough road to travel...but the trip is worth it, and you may just get some hilarious stories along the way.

[jimi_dini]

If a man is single all of his life it's because he is the common denominator and he is royally fucking up somehow, same for a woman.

...or he/she has an severe incurable chronic disease, which is not their fuck up. One could say their fault though. Still in such situation, I would say women have it a bit easier.

[Empowe]

I'm getting better at cold approaches. My ice-breakers go pretty well, and even my really experienced friends say they think it's my late game rather than my early game that ruins things for me. It just sucks because I was homeschooled and a very late bloomer. Things guys learned to navigate at 14 are what I'm learning at 23...there's just nothing to be done other than force myself to learn the ropes and figure things out the hard way (eg trial and error). I need to be quicker on my feet, though. Often I'll open up a window for myself even with sexy girls, but it closes because my inexperience rears its head. Just today at the pool I said fuck it and approached a total hottie and made small talk, and she asked what I was doing tonight. In true virgin fashion I was taken aback and fumbled my chance away, but don't think I won't force myself to bullshit a response next time a girl asks. Improvement is a tough road to travel...but the trip is worth it, and you may just get some hilarious stories along the way.

The risk-taking sounds fun, actually!

I've been told I have 'no game'. So I guess I've got to start from scratch like you did.

It's not hard at all actually. Just look up what clubs are in the area, call them and ask if you can join. You might feel nervous as it's outside your comfort zone, but just remember that there's nothing strange about what you're doing.

I most likely will do, yes. It'd be easier with a friend to go with, but I will have to go alone. Maybe there will be somebody else that's new to the group and on their own. Even if there's not, I hope I'd find friends there.

I'll see how it goes. It might not be next month or the month after, but hopefully I can give it a shot before the year is out.

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

I've been told I have 'no game'.

This can work in your favor if you play it off as charming and self-deprecating (but only to an extent) rather than desperate or weird.

[Empowe]

This can work in your favor if you play it off as charming and self-deprecating (but only to an extent) rather than desperate or weird.

Yeah, I don't want to sound too down on myself, I guess. Or down at all really.

[Antagon]

I most likely will do, yes. It'd be easier with a friend to go with, but I will have to go alone. Maybe there will be somebody else that's new to the group and on their own. Even if there's not, I hope I'd find friends there. I'll see how it goes. It might not be next month or the month after, but hopefully I can give it a shot before the year is out.

Why wait? Big chance that you'll have an excuse every time you should call them and end up not doing it at all. Unless you've got a really good reason just call them first chance you get,

[crush7337]

Alright need some advice guys.

I've been dating a girl for the past 3 weeks, and we just set up a date to see each other tomorrow. Immediately after setting up the date she texts me that she's not really ready for a relationship, but still likes being with me. We've already done enough together where I should have passed by the "friend zone" stage.

Is there anything I can do tomorrow to get her to reconsider? I'm fairly sure that she likes me more than a friend and I really like her. Should I just take it real slow after tomorrow and see if she reconsiders in a few weeks? I'm not really in the state right now where I want to immediately date other people as I'm sure she'll come up in my mind with whoever else I date.

[KlotePino]

I don't think I hate girls/women but I find it hard to disagree with the notion that they can be a lot more fickle and hard to read. That might be one of the things that make them so appealing to me although that might just be because I always go for the one's that are way more trouble then they need to be. Just yesterday my best bud told me the girl he's been seeing for a while now suddenly had a change of heart. She had been suggesting taking things to the next level and finally making things more official and serious but when she came back from a two week vacation she had apparently cheated and decided to break things off because her feelings were gone. His girl and situation are pretty similar to mine so I'm kinda scared the same things going to happen in my case.

This situation could obviously also occur with the roles reversed but from personal experience it seems like these situations mostly occur with the female either having an actual sudden change of heart or just not being very transparent with her feelings.

He's blaming it on his looks and the lack of physical attraction that she supposedly has with him. Character goes a long way and I feel I'm pretty good in this department but there has to be physical attraction too for a relationship or even just a fling to work. I really do believe being a funny guy and feeling confident goes a long way but for 18 year old girls who can have pretty much any dude they want that isn't really that important yet. It will be when they get older but just not yet for most attractive one's in my experience. Especially in a club-like environment in which talking and joking around is pretty much impossible. I'm not sure if this helps credit my experiences more but I recently and have before managed to make-out with with pretty attractive (and not just drunk) girls in clubs. I realize that might seem contradictory but that's because I'm fairly happy about my looks and my ability to talk to girls, unlike some others in this thread. I'm starting to ramble here but what I want to say to those inexperienced or insecure about their looks: don't go to a club. It's probably not an environment in which you'll feel very comfortable in or be very succesful in, if you do more power to ya but I feel meeting girls through other social events that don't restrict talking as much is a way better option.

And to quickly jump back to physical attraction and my own little problem,

If a girl still wants you physically it can compensate for so much trouble and defuse so many situations, it also does affect the power balance in a relationship or atleast I feel like it does in my situation right now.

Having the power to get any dude in a club like some of them can is understandably a power that might be hard to let go off. I hope I don't have a twisted world view on this but I feel like I'm wasting my time chasing my 18 year old gal who is definitely not ready to commit yet and with the physical attraction seemingly fading I feel like things probably won't work out. This one's just pretty much my first love and since I've reconnected with her 3 years later I still have strong feelings for her so I have to see it through.

Alright need some advice guys. I've been dating a girl for the past 3 weeks, and we just set up a date to see each other tomorrow. Immediately after setting up the date she texts me that she's not really ready for a relationship, but still likes being with me. We've already done enough together where I should have passed by the "friend zone" stage. Is there anything I can do tomorrow to get her to reconsider? I'm fairly sure that she likes me more than a friend and I really like her. Should I just take it real slow after tomorrow and see if she reconsiders in a few weeks? I'm not really in the state right now where I want to immediately date other people as I'm sure she'll come up in my mind with whoever else I date.

Are you having sex or progressing to it? If so, I'd just take it slow and enjoy it unless you think you have a good shot at another girl you'd consider dating.

[Sub_Level]

Does anyone here ever get anxiety about whether or not they should go out on the weekends?

On one hand, if I stay in I can drink some beer, smoke some cigarettes, watch some Batman, and generally enjoy myself but I might regret not having gone out tomorrow. On the other hand, if I go out I can live a little (meet some girls maybe) and have a little beer and cigs too, but I have to spend time and gas getting to the party or bar and coming from there as well.

For some added context, I have a good tank of gas, none of my close friends can go out tonight, and I don't yet have a consistent paying job (gonna go hunting in the next couple weeks) so spending money is a little short.

What's the better deal, the saved disposable income and guaranteed comfort, or the opportunity to live some life and not have regret? I'm leaning more with the former, at least until I get a part-time job hopefully in the next couple weeks.

[SquiddyCracker]

Alright need some advice guys. I've been dating a girl for the past 3 weeks, and we just set up a date to see each other tomorrow. Immediately after setting up the date she texts me that she's not really ready for a relationship, but still likes being with me. We've already done enough together where I should have passed by the "friend zone" stage. Is there anything I can do tomorrow to get her to reconsider? I'm fairly sure that she likes me more than a friend and I really like her. Should I just take it real slow after tomorrow and see if she reconsiders in a few weeks? I'm not really in the state right now where I want to immediately date other people as I'm sure she'll come up in my mind with whoever else I date.

Movie night!

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

If a girl still wants you physically it can compensate for so much trouble and defuse so many situations, it also does affect the power balance in a relationship or atleast I feel like it does in my situation right now.

This is really horseshit. I know a beautiful girl whose long-term dating history is mostly full of fat, generally unattractive dudes. It's all about charm, confidence, and value, not whether you have the nicest face to look at or something.

However you could make the argument that being attractive gives you more confidence and a head-start on building your value, but in the end everyone is equal.

[KlotePino]

Does anyone here ever get anxiety about whether or not they should go out on the weekends? On one hand, if I stay in I can drink some beer, smoke some cigarettes, watch some Batman, and generally enjoy myself but I might regret not having gone out tomorrow. On the other hand, if I go out I can live a little (meet some girls maybe) and have a little beer and cigs too, but I have to spend time and gas getting to the party or bar and coming from there as well. For some added context, I have a good tank of gas, none of my close friends can go out tonight, and I don't yet have a consistent paying job (gonna go hunting in the next couple weeks) so spending money is a little short. What's the better deal, the saved disposable income and guaranteed comfort, or the opportunity to live some life and not have regret? I'm leaning more with the former, at least until I get a part-time job hopefully in the next couple weeks.

I had a period when I was working too and it always felt like a lose-lose situation with a small possibility of winning (although lose-lose might make it seems a little too negative). For me going out is usually ok fun but it costs money and I don't like being hungover in the morning but sometimes you have those nights where you might have really fun contact with a girl or you just have a really good time with your friends. You go out so that you don't miss those nights that your friends'll tell you all about the day after and you'll spend the entire night wondering if they're out there having a good time. But usually it turns out to just be a steady decent night and I used to feel like I might've just preferred staying home.

Right now it's vacation for me so I'll feel guilty if I stay at home during the nights that my friends ask me to go out with them.

This is really horseshit. I know a beautiful girl whose long-term dating history is mostly full of fat, generally unattractive dudes. It's all about charm, confidence, and value, not whether you have the nicest face to look at or something. However you could make the argument that being attractive gives you more confidence and a head-start on building your value, but in the end everyone is equal.

May I ask how old she is? Would you say she's the rule or the exception? I just feel like she'd be an exception and a better and less shallow person than some other girls.

[Empowe]

Why wait? Big chance that you'll have an excuse every time you should call them and end up not doing it at all. Unless you've got a really good reason just call them first chance you get,

I have no good reason to wait, no! It has been excuses all the way up 'till now.

Thanks again.

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

May I ask how old she is? Would you say she's the rule or the exception? I just feel like she'd be an exception and a better and less shallow person than some other girls.

30 now, but we're talking about her dating past going back to around 20 or so.

Monogamy is rough in your younger years. I would say your problems with wandering women have less to do with appearance and more to do with curiosity in youth.

I feel like it could be said a billion times in this thread and it still wouldn't matter: your looks are not that important. Go to that "show off your gf/wife" thread. There are some pretty standard/ugly dudes in there with ridiculously attractive ladies.

[KlotePino]

30 now, but we're talking about her dating past going back to around 20 or so. Monogamy is rough in your younger years. I would say your problems with wandering women have less to do with appearance and more to do with curiosity in youth.

That's pretty much what I wanted to touch on in my post although it was a clusterfuck so that might not have been entirely clear. I believe things like confidence and humor matter even at my age although I believe physical appearance is also important at this age because a girl wants the dude to be accepted by her friends especially if she would even want to think about a relationship and monogamy is a pretty tough sell for most girls at that age.

[Tess3ract]

I feel this comic is relevant to a lot of you lonely, angry dudes:

written by a woman iirc, doesn't count.

Here's an example of a guy getting a woman way out of his league:

Dude looks like he got beat with a lead pipe and he still got a hot girlfriend. You can do it too.

[Cubsfan23]

If you believe looks are important, you are right.

If you believe looks aren't important, you are right.




Which one do you want to be right?

[Sub_Level]

If you believe looks are important, you are right. If you believe looks aren't important, you are right. Which one do you want to be right?

Depends on if I feel ripped or fat that day lol

[worldrevolution]

written by a woman iirc, doesn't count. Here's an example of a guy getting a woman way out of his league: Dude looks like he got beat with a lead pipe and he still got a hot girlfriend. You can do it too.

What the fuck. Are we looking at the same picture. That dude is neither incredibly ugly nor
is she anywhere near hot. They both look totally fine and seem like a nice couple.

[Tess3ract]

Looks are always somewhat important, to people as a whole. Tastes are subjective, some people realize it but don't care.

However saying that "looks aren't important" is close to being a liar. They're important as a whole though it might not apply to everyone.

What the fuck. Are we looking at the same picture. That dude is neither incredibly ugly nor is she anywhere hot. They both look totally fine and seem like a nice couple.

I wasn't saying they weren't a nice couple. I'm saying he has a neanderthal face.

[Valru]

What the fuck. Are we looking at the same picture. That dude is neither incredibly ugly nor is she anywhere hot. They both look totally fine and seem like a nice couple.

Going to have to agree.

[Devolution]

Looks are always somewhat important, to people as a whole. Tastes are subjective, some people realize it but don't care. However saying that "looks aren't important" is close to being a liar. They're important as a whole though it might not apply to everyone. I wasn't saying they weren't a nice couple. I'm saying he has a neanderthal face.

The irony is you seem to be more critical of his looks as a dude. Also if you have a butterface, your best bet is to get ripped. If you're a woman with a butterface, welp.

[worldrevolution]

I wasn't saying they weren't a nice couple. I'm saying he has a neanderthal face.

Sorry to break this to you but you need glasses or a new monitor. Or a grip on reality.

[Redux]

Dude looks like he got beat with a lead pipe and he still got a hot girlfriend. You can do it too.

He looks fine to me. Maybe get a stylish haircut, and workout just a little bit (dude would be an absolute tank)

[Tess3ract]

The irony is you seem to be more critical of his looks as a dude. Also if you have a butterface, your best bet is to get ripped. If you're a woman with a butterface, welp.

I don't agree. I think your initial reasoning applies to both genders Miss Devo.

Sorry to break this to you but you need glasses or a new monitor. Or a grip on reality.

I'm sorry that taste is subjective. Which was the point.

He looks fine to me. Maybe get a stylish haircut, and workout just a little bit (dude would be an absolute tank)

imo I think he'd look better with a beard and a differnt hairstyle.

[worldrevolution]

He looks fine to me. Maybe get a stylish haircut, and workout just a little bit (dude would be an absolute tank)

Great smile too. That guy is the man straight up. Well maybe not, but he sure as fuck isn't worthy of being called out in this thread of all places.

Taste is fine but if in your world that's incredibly hot and ugly.. Well.. Hmm.. I got nutin.

[Izick]

Holy shit, why are you beating down that guy, Tess? It's not really cool to post people you know, without their permission on Gaf anyway.

[Redux]

Great smile too. That guy is the man straight up. Well maybe not, but he sure as fuck isn't worthy of being called out in this thread of all places. Taste is fine but if in your world that's incredibly hot and ugly.. Well.. Hmm.. I got nutin.

Plus I bet he giggles like a bear.

Holy shit, why are you beating down that guy, Tess? It's not really cool to post people you know on forums anyway.

The dude is quickly becoming a God on GAF

[Devolution]

I don't agree. I think your initial reasoning applies to both genders Miss Devo.

What reasoning? So far the dudes in here seem to be way more critical of how men look (including themselves) than anyone I've run into.

[crush7337]

Are you having sex or progressing to it? If so, I'd just take it slow and enjoy it unless you think you have a good shot at another girl you'd consider dating.

Progressing to it. Probably could have the last time we were together but time constraints just kept it at making out and groping each other.

And no I didn't have anyone else in mind for dating.

[JennyTablina]

Alright need some advice guys. I've been dating a girl for the past 3 weeks, and we just set up a date to see each other tomorrow. Immediately after setting up the date she texts me that she's not really ready for a relationship, but still likes being with me. We've already done enough together where I should have passed by the "friend zone" stage. Is there anything I can do tomorrow to get her to reconsider? I'm fairly sure that she likes me more than a friend and I really like her. Should I just take it real slow after tomorrow and see if she reconsiders in a few weeks? I'm not really in the state right now where I want to immediately date other people as I'm sure she'll come up in my mind with whoever else I date.

In the very least she is being up front about her feelings, so she respects and likes you genuinely enough, to let you know that currently she doesn't feel ready to commit to anything. Bit of a shame and a let down, but means ball should be in her court if she wants to kick things up again.

Sometimes it's the "kind" way of saying "I like you, but I don't like you in that way" too. Sucks because she should of made her mind up before then, but sometimes people just get cold feet or realize too late that it isn't what they really want.

Maybe when you see her for this "date" (I assume it's still on, but in a more platonic capacity) you can talk about it and see if it's just cold feet getting to her or genuine loss of interest/ desire to not be tied down right now.

I would say, don't take to waiting around for her to change her mind, if she sticks to her current feelings. If you are happy to be friends with her, by all means do that, but back off just a little physically and emotionally. Treat her as a friend, by all means help or support if she needs it, but not beyond what you would do for any other friend. Otherwise you may feel like a mook later, if she decides to go date other guys instead.

Not saying to not be friendly and close, but be aware of what you personally consider to be actions of "friends" and actions of "lovers" or "flirting". Some girls are quite happy to accept fairly borderline actions like hugs/cuddles/heart-to-heart talks without the relationship commitment, treating the guy like a big security blanket before discarding them for something new later. Be a good friend, but don't be the security blanket sitting around waiting for her. If she comes back to you, great, but in the meantime, find other things to do with your time and put her a little lower down the priority list for a bit.

[Minamu]

Empowerer Blarg, you could be my twin! You're thinking about it in a positive way, that's great. Don't fret too much over it though.

Man: How was your night out? Mine was great :) Apart from always sweating like a damn pig on the dance floor, I had a blast. (and no, that hasn't been a problem)

[Man]

Talked to plenty of ladies. I wingmanned up with a lesbian chick and we went around for a couple of hours which was just fun in itself.
People commented on my clothing and one lady told me my body was the perfect male specimen. Felt good man. No luck though, no numbers.

[JokerOfSpades]

What reasoning? So far the dudes in here seem to be way more critical of how men look (including themselves) than anyone I've run into.

Truf.

[RionaaM]

I am still alone at 26 - never had a girlfriend. I am damned sure it's something that's wrong with me though: my attitude, for one. A life of sitting indoors playing videogames and not participating in everyday social situations is where I think I've gone wrong. Other men can talk to women in a natural non-forced manner, and be able to pick up on hints of interest and react to them accordingly, or even begin flirting themselves. I, on the other hand, have just not learnt the skills. Everyday life skills, at that. That is where I've gone wrong. Fact is I've got a LOT of footwork to do and catch up on if I want any chance of changing my situation. I've got to face all the rejections and make all the mistakes I should've been through and learnt from through all my adult life. I've not grown in the way I should have, instead preferring to hide in my videogames and other solitary hobbies. It feels weird to be in this situation at 26. Like I said, I've got a lot of work to do. And it's either 'do', or rot away in a lonely/unfulfilling existence. I enjoy my hobbies and being alone sometimes, but not experiencing common and intrinsic parts of life is not healthy. At least, I don't think so.

And what are you planning on doing? I think I'm headed the same way, only 5 years younger and having been with a girl once (not sure if I can call her my "girlfriend", but whatever). I don't want to spend all my days playing videogames, but don't know what else to do, where to start changing. Every day I grow more and more apart from my friends, some won't even talk to me anymore, another got angry at me a couple of weeks ago and I haven't been in contact with the whole group because of that.

I know everyone here says "go out, be more social and start talking to people". I REALLY want to do that, but first I need to know HOW. Where do I go? With whom? What should I do there?

[Etrian Oddity]

I know everyone here says "go out, be more social and start talking to people". I REALLY want to do that, but first I need to know HOW. Where do I go? With whom? What should I do there?

I addressed a lot of my social inadequacies by rushing a fraternity. Granted, you may not have that luxury, but finding a crew of men who are better with women and social situations than you is always the best option.

[scar tissue]

He'd blame anyone but himself because introspection and looking in the mirror are far too difficult. It's much easier to blame women and society for what is his own personal failings. If a man is single all of his life it's because he is the common denominator and he is royally fucking up somehow, same for a woman. It is not hard to enter into a relationship, the difficulty comes in maintaining it. The fact that he keeps blaming women for everything and comes up short, the irony is lost on him probably.

Disagree with the bolded part.
Social anxiety is no-one's fault, and it's pretty effective at keeping people (especially men) single. Entering a relationship is most definitely not easy with SA, even just trying to get laid is hell.
Being shy/awkward means you're staying a virgin/single for a long, long time for many SA guys.

As an example, my own history:

15 - Too shy to talk to girls, girls had no idea I even existed
17 - Confident enough to talk to girls, but still so awkward/nervous girls were turned off
19 - Not that awkward anymore, but still unable to flirt/approach girls. Girls weren't turned off but also didn't associate me with anything sexual.
21 - hit-and-miss flirting with more misses than hits, unable to initiate physical contact, girls were starting to show slight interest
23 - somewhat able to flirt, able to initiate very slight physical contact, occasionally a girl is showing obvious interest. Alas, I'm unable to really 'get physical' because, I'll be honest, I'm scared shitless of sex (and even making out, to a lesser extent), or rather the consequences if I do something wrong. My biggest fear is initiating a kiss, and then finding out I misinterpreted her signs and she didn't want it/I was really bad at it/I've misjudged the moment in any other way. I've already thrown away three pretty surefire chances at getting laid in the last year because of this. Fucking SA.

Basically, my progress is really solid, but the foundation is so shitty that it's taking years and years to get to the level of a normal 16 y/o.

/vent-age

[Devolution]

Disagree with the bolded part. Social anxiety is no-one's fault, and it's pretty effective at keeping people (especially men) single. Entering a relationship is most definitely not easy with SA, even just trying to get laid is hell. Being shy/awkward means you're staying a virgin/single for a long, long time for many SA guys. As an example, my own history: 15 - Too shy to talk to girls, girls had no idea I even existed 17 - Confident enough to talk to girls, but still so awkward/nervous girls were turned off 19 - Not that awkward anymore, but still unable to flirt/approach girls. Girls weren't turned off but also didn't associate me with anything sexual. 21 - hit-and-miss flirting with more misses than hits, unable to initiate physical contact, girls were starting to show slight interest 23 - somewhat able to flirt, able to initiate very slight physical contact, occasionally a girl is showing obvious interest. Alas, I'm unable to really 'get physical' because, I'll be honest, I'm scared shitless of sex (and even making out, to a lesser extent). I've already thrown away three pretty surefire chances at getting laid in the last year because of this. Fucking SA. Basically, my progress is really solid, but the foundation is so shitty that it's taking years and years to get to the level of a normal 16 y/o. /vent-age

If you have SA you have to socialize with everyone before you should even try flirting but the answer isn't to blame an entire gender. The issue still lies with you.

[scar tissue]

If you have SA you have to socialize with everyone before you should even try flirting but the answer isn't to blame an entire gender. The issue still lies with you.

The issue may well be within you, but that doesn't mean you're "royally fucking it up".
Seriously, that's just plain insulting. People work their hardest and still can't overcome their SA.

[Etrian Oddity]

If you have SA you have to socialize with everyone before you should even try flirting but the answer isn't to blame an entire gender. The issue still lies with you.

Blaming an entire gender is wrong; but you are vastly underrating how big a factor luck is.

You could be the absolute perfect match for someone, and meet them on a bad day for them.

Luck plays a huge factor, devo.

[Devolution]

Blaming an entire gender is wrong; but you are vastly underrating how big a factor luck is. You could be the absolute perfect match for someone, and meet them on a bad day for them. Luck plays a huge factor, devo.

Luck doesn't play that much of a factor unless you don't socialize enough.

[RionaaM]

I addressed a lot of my social inadequacies by rushing a fraternity. Granted, you may not have that luxury, but finding a crew of men who are better with women and social situations than you is always the best option.

Yes, I know. That's what I was asking: where do I find those guys? There aren't fraternities here in Argentina, at least not that I know of.

The last bunch of people I used to hang out with I met them on the internet, but don't visit that forum anymore. I can only hope to make some "friends" on my job, but apart from that, I can't think of a way to meet new people.

[Etrian Oddity]

Luck doesn't play that much of a factor unless you don't socialize enough.

Poppycock. There are a ton of variables, and it boils down to statistics and probability. (Hence why dating is a numbers game.)

Don't get me wrong, you're very much right about the necessity of socializing. But, luck is an enormous factor. Maybe you (girl) have had a rotten day and just don't want to reciprocate any approaches; that's just bad luck on the part of the guy. Maybe every girl a guy meets who would be compatible with him is already taken, etc.

A guy can't shake his fists and blame his entire set of problems on bad luck, but it does play a very big role.

Yes, I know. That's what I was asking: where do I find those guys? There aren't fraternities here in Argentina, at least not that I know of. The last bunch of people I used to hang out with I met them on the internet, but don't visit that forum anymore. I can only hope to make some "friends" on my job, but apart from that, I can't think of a way to meet new people.

Go out to music venues, parks, etc, and plan to have fun alone. Make small talk with people who seem friendly and go from there.

Alternatively, you could look into group meetings in the vein of dating coaches or Simple Pickup. Just don't get suckered into the "bootcamps" which cost $1k to attend.

[Liu Kang Baking A Pie]

Horrible, horrible example. They're both celebrities and rich. Same for Heidi Klum and seal. She would not be dating him if he was a regular guy.

I know KFG isn't here anymore, but everyone else, seriously, this is all wrong.

Everyone is different, but at least from what I know of most of the lady friends and their friends I've known throughout my life, wealth and celebrity aren't important. However, wealth and celebrity are results of having a passion and being really great at something. That is what I hear about and see women wanting over and over.

It's a turn-on for most ladies if you are fucking great at something and love doing it. Video games will likely not count, but maybe you're fucking great at making them (have you seen the lady GAF poster Mario is with?) or making music for them or anything. Again, everyone is different, but in general women (and men) like competence, skill, and decisiveness. Be that. Even if you never get famous or wealthy, you will likely get a lot of attention you never would have gotten otherwise.

[JokerOfSpades]

I addressed a lot of my social inadequacies by rushing a fraternity. Granted, you may not have that luxury, but finding a crew of men who are better with women and social situations than you is always the best option.

People, this depends on who you know. Just because they're good with girls doesn't particularly imply good advice. Well, good for your mindset.

[Antagon]

I have no good reason to wait, no! It has been excuses all the way up 'till now. Thanks again.

Good luck!

Believe me, the excuses sound familiar. Done that way too much myself.

[Bucket-o-roadkill]

Had date with girl number 10 Friday night, have had 2 texts from her since, considering we used to text like 20 times a day before that id say I'll be looking for girl number 11 soon I guess, although I'm finding it harder to go through this process of being constantly rejected.

You know, it's kind of becoming offensive, Yes my hairs starting to go to shit and in 10 years ill probably look like Mr burns. Unless I win the lottery and get a hair transplant there's not much I can do about this. It's not like I can rectify it, some guys get away with dodgy hair situations but unfortunately I'm not Jason Stathom. Do I stop texting a girl I've met up with just because she's not got a model figure or doesn't drive or something? No. Its all so superficial, i wonder if a single word I say on these dates is even listened too. Hell, 10 minutes into my last date she was on the phone to another guy (friend... ) to arrange a bike ride Saturday. After driving an hour to meet her in felt like a right tool, i guess in hindsight I should have bailed out then really but it was quite a drive to get there.. Fuck sake. This dating game is seriously no fun and a completely demoralising experience. Before all this I didn't feel great, but I was in a much better place than I am now. I feel my lack of success justified and confirmed my doubts which were only in the background of my mind previously, now they are much more amplified. I also feel the stress and upset of going through this has directly contributed to my hair thinning which is ironically lowering my chances of attracting anyone even further.

I don't know what to recommend to the guy who's 26 and just about to try getting out there and meeting girls. I hope to god you have a better experience than I have, its been one nightmare after another. Maybe in a few years I should try a again with women who are more mature, but my lack of luck and success with women throughout my 20s has left me utterly exhausted with the concept of dating to be honest.

[Minamu]

Talked to plenty of ladies. I wingmanned up with a lesbian chick and we went around for a couple of hours which was just fun in itself. People commented on my clothing and one lady told me my body was the perfect male specimen. Felt good man. No luck though, no numbers.

That sounds great :D What happened when you were with the lesbian? I had my magical red jeans and a six year old Maiden shirt last night. One drunk guy noticed it and yelled out the name and gave me a half empty glass of white wine xD He also asked for my Metallica opinion.

And here's a short story for you who don't like texting. I was dancing with some friends when a cute brunette saw me. After some dancing with her and her two friends, they disappear to a table for some drinks with a guy so I figure that was it. But I get some eye contact with her and wave to her to join me but she doesn't come. A few minutes later though, she comes up and drags me off the dance floor to join her on the couch where she almost immediately asks if she can add me on facebook, which she does. We play around all night but I lose her by the end (planned after party obviously not going to happen). But when I'm in the Burger King line, I get a fb message from her asking for my number, she texts me and I call her up. We're probably gonna meet up now again because of a fb add and some text chatting.

Edit: And if she hadn't asked she would never see me again as I'm only in town for another week, which I told her, so she better move fast xD

[Man]

No luck for either me or the lesbian. Lots of dancing though with strangers together. We ended up sharing FB details. Was wearing grey dresspants and a dark stripey shirt.

Nice one getting her number mate! A win there so keep us updated on how it unfolds.

[Minamu]

No luck for either me or the lesbian. Lots of dancing though with strangers together. We ended up sharing FB details. Was wearing grey dresspants and a dark stripey shirt. Nice one getting her number mate! A win there so keep us updated on how it unfolds.

Thanks :) I couldn't help but laugh as her friend kept telling my girl how incredibly good looking I was xD I rarely view myself as good looking at all so it was nice to hear. They weren't bad kissers either of them either ;)