[Starfish_Oxide]

This thread.

wut.

Also where are our Google Overlords?

[leadbelly]

You gotta get every drop out man. You know how when toothpaste won't come out and you have to squeeze at the base and slide your fingers up? Just do that. Then you won't glue your urethra up! And to defend him... 'Jap's eye' is the most common term for it by far. I'm sure I've even heard it on medical shows over here haha!

Yeah. It's not an intentionally racist term. I'm not sure the term 'Jap' is quite as offensive in the UK as it may be in the US.

[Atramental]

Yeah. It's not an intentionally racist term. I'm not sure the term 'Jap' is quite as offensive as it may be in the US.

Yeah, in the US that's basically like saying "chink".

[leadbelly]

Yeah, in the US that's basically like saying "chink".

In the context I said it anyway, it is quite common in the UK. It's the only term for it I ever hear. lol

[wormstrangler]

what am I doing with my life...

AT LEAST 3 times a day just sounds annoying to me (time constraints)

Once in the morning and maybe once at night.

[Socreges]

I jerk off 7 times a day and I'm fine.

[DMeisterJ]

So my little soldier leans to the left. It's always been like this as far as I can remember but it really didn't bother me till today. I woke up to pee and didn't notice that I'm peeing all over the rim and spraying everywhere till it was to late. It functions perfectly fine but always with a left slant. This normal? I jerk off 3 times a day and sleep on my right side. I believe this is causing the issue. Anyone else like this? How do I fix it.

Jesus Christ.

[Atramental]

AT LEAST 3 times a day just sounds annoying to me (time constraints) Once in the morning and maybe once at night.

Well I have a 3.00 GPA I have to maintain so I can't be bothered by such base activities.

[pompidu]

Jesus Christ.

Once in the morning. Then after I get home from school. Then right before bed.

[upJTboogie]

I had that in Jr High when I was constantly getting erections in class, it's fine now.

[DMeisterJ]

Once in the morning. Then after I get home from school. Then right before bed.

That's way too much masturbation.

More than once a day is definitely in excess. Try making a effort to cut back. Especially if you're having sex with the gf regularly.

[McLovin]

wouldn't switching hands fix it?

[Tashbrooke]

i sense tag fishing.


Doesnt sound weird OP, loads of people have a slight bend to their penis, some girls fucking love it

[DUFFMCWALIN]

In other words : There's no good reasons to wear a bra, girls.

FUCK FINALLY I now have a legit reason why I don't want my girlfriend to wear bras.

[pompidu]

That's way too much masturbation. More than once a day is definitely in excess. Try making a effort to cut back. Especially if you're having sex with the gf regularly.

I see no reason to stop. Lol

[DontTouchMe]

lol this thread has made me laugh more than it should have

[Emitan]

maybe you'll find a girl with a weird shaped vagina

fits like a glove

[Apeopleman]

So my little soldier leans to the left. It's always been like this as far as I can remember but it really didn't bother me till today. I woke up to pee and didn't notice that I'm peeing all over the rim and spraying everywhere till it was to late. It functions perfectly fine but always with a left slant. This normal? I jerk off 3 times a day and sleep on my right side. I believe this is causing the issue. Anyone else like this? How do I fix it.

I think its called a "Captain Hook"

[Persona7]

Little...Soldier?

[Log4Girlz]

Well, you need to get it straightened as others have noted. The best way to do this is to cut it clean off at the base of the shaft. Put it under some heavy books for a few days until the curvature has straightened. You can also tray ironing it but then you will have to deal with scorch marks. Once straightened you simply sew it back on.

[Matts Legacy]

So my little soldier leans to the left. It's always been like this as far as I can remember but it really didn't bother me till today. I woke up to pee and didn't notice that I'm peeing all over the rim and spraying everywhere till it was to late. It functions perfectly fine but always with a left slant. This normal? I jerk off 3 times a day and sleep on my right side. I believe this is causing the issue. Anyone else like this? How do I fix it.

Seriously your junk is fine

[ffdgh]

...this is hilarious for all the wrong reasons.

[KingOfReading]

Entertaining thread. In all seriousness, I'm pretty sure the OP is all right. Everyone's business swings at a different angle.

[Wazzim]

Jerking 3 times a day? Jesus.

Tone that down or you'll only shoot a water like substance the next time you've sex.

[Banglish]

OP, Im like you. I sometimes jo 3 times a day. Also, my penis bends to the left. You know why we're better that our straight dick counter-parts don't you? Apparently our dicks feel more awesome in a vagina cause we reach parts that straight ones can't. In theory.

[Patrick Bateman]

[Phat Michael]

Slam it in a door facing right.

I liked that response for no particular reason.

[PumpkinPie]

... Who have you been hanging around? WWII vets? It's called the urinary meatus or your "dick hole" http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=meatus http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Urinary_meatus

LOL I can't believe he wrote that -_-

[Hamplin]

Penis slanting to either side is perfectly normal. In fact, the majority of people get that to some extent. it certainly has nothing to do with you sleeping on your right side. That's just stupid. Sexual education on gaf is not doing too well i see.

[Koodo]

This thread makes me want to write penis in all caps.

PENIS PENIS PENIS

[plasmasd]

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kHFnc_eV4Lg

[Monocle]

Sounds like your piece is well within the normal range of variation. Masturbation frequency and sleeping posture do not affect penis shape. And no, you can't coax, slap, wrangle, or frighten it straight. Though I'm sure you can find someone who's willing to help you try.

[-PXG-]

*sigh* Do I have to be the one to actually answer the OP without a joke? It's genetic and natural. Not all penii are shaped the same. There is nothing wrong. Some guys have straight, some guys have a bend. Don't sweat it. Stroking it likely has had no effect. Also breasts don't sag as a woman ages due to gravity. Wearing a bra has no effect. That too is genetic. If you're a woman, your boobs will either sag or they won't. It's already decided in your genes.

I am such a child...

I fucking lost it at "penii".

God damnit

Looooooooool