[sixteen-bit]

This is the kind of movie that that show, 'The Critic' used to make up as a parody of bad movies.

Also, Transformers.

[SapientWolf]

Funny thing is that the "Battleship-homage-scene" is actually quite good and it's easily the best written scene of the movie. It's a good popcorn flick but it's missing that Michael Bay-magic.

The spells he casts to make huge profits on terrible films? I think Battleship clearly does have that magic.

Ok, The Rock was halfway decent. I'll give him that.

[Castor Krieg]

Of course it did well, main female lead (no, not Rihanna) is super hot.

[Busty]

Even these numbers are just okay, not spectacular.

And when you spent the amount of money Universal (the most expensive film the studio has ever produced BTW) did you need spectacular numbers, not just solid.







...., also the film fucking horrendous. They actually made what was already a wretched abomination of a script even worse which took some doing in and of itself. Truly awful.

That film is nothing more than big noises and bright lights to amuse morons much like the mobiles that hang above cots to help babies sleep.

*folds arms*

[Caboose]

127 million after almost two weeks is really not that good. It'll finish with less than 300 million OS. With a 250 million+ budget, it might even be a bomba.

[themadcowtipper]

I myself will wait for The Asylum mockbuster verison.

[Devolution]

Crossfire up next?

[Busty]

I myself will wait for The Asylum mockbuster verison.

IIRC it's called American Battleship and stars Mario Van Peebles.

This might be the first Asylum film that's better than the film it's trying to copy.

[Deadly Cyclone]

There's one reason this film makes money.

[Zyzyxxz]

The spells he casts to make huge profits on terrible films? I think Battleship clearly does have that magic. Ok, The Rock was halfway decent. I'll give him that.

Yeah but looking back the Rock was ridiculous for its corny dialogue and attempts to show honorable men. Doesn't mean I hate the movie and I'd still watch the hell out of the movie in fact I love repeating my favorite lines from it.

On most requirements yes it's a bad but entertaining movie.

[speculawyer]

Is such a thing even possible?

[fuenf]

The spells he casts to make huge profits on terrible films? I think Battleship clearly does have that magic. Ok, The Rock was halfway decent. I'll give him that.

Even when compared to Transformers something felt off about Battleship. Bay atleast believes in himself and thinks that he made a legitimately good movie. Battleship on the other hand feels like a carbon copy of Bay's Transformers formula without the same "love". If Battleship wouldnt take itself so serious it could easily pass as a parody of Transformers and i think that shows, it just doesnt convey any reason to believe that the director / cast actually enjoy being part of the movie (with the exception of Rihanna maybe).

[RoboPlato]

I didn't even know it opened abroad first. I can't wait to see it, it looks so fucking ridiculous and insane that it should be right up my alley.

Same here. Once I saw that the aliens shoot the board game pegs I couldn't wait to see how insane this movie got.

[Busty]

There's one reason this film makes money.

..., you do realise that he's in the film for less than ten minutes? In the script I read his character was in it for about twenty pages so they actually cut it down further. Apparently in the finished film he has less than 30 thirty lines of dialogue.

[Derrick01]

I don't care if it's a dumb action movie, that's basically all I expect from Hollywood nowadays and I'll enjoy it for what it is.

Also, Liam Neeson. He's worth the price of admission alone.

[themadcowtipper]

IIRC it's called American Battleship and stars Mario Van Peebles. This might be the first Asylum film that's better than the film it's trying to copy.

Carl Weathers? SOLD!

[Pachterballs]

I saw it. It's so bad it's good. I'd recommend it simply because it's so stupid. Crazy ass EXXXXplosions

[KillerMan91]

127 million after almost two weeks is really not that good. It'll finish with less than 300 million OS. With a 250 million+ budget, it might even be a bomba.

This. Assuming it will do pretty much same in the states and we have total gross of 500-600 million for 250 million movie. Not that great.

[Dreams-Visions]

Not the first movie to do well with mediocre reviews.

People like to see shit blow up. Film at 11.

[Escape Goat]

Is the cost of releasing in foreign markets as expensive though? I'd imagine there is a lot less overhead.

[RoboPlato]

There's one reason this film makes money.

I really, really hope he gets to scream, "YOU SUNK MY BATTLESHIP!"

[Hot Coldman]

Crossfire up next?

"2064. NEW YORK CITY and LOS ANGELES are the last strongholds of humankind, as the remnants of the United States defend the East Coast from the threat of final destruction from the conquered West Coast and its new masters, the Soviet-Oriental People's Alliance. Only the two sides' powerful Cannon Reminiscent Offensive Stratagem Solely Functioning In Rare Extremes- or C.R.O.S.S.F.I.R.E.- technology keeps the two sides from continuing their bitter. However, when US scouts investigating a downed Unidentified Flying Object in Kansas are captured by Alliance soldiers, claiming they have intruded on Alliance territory, the US are prepared to turn to C.R.O.S.S.F.I.R.E. Little does either side now, the discoveries that the scouts have made have deadly consequences for every last remaining human- and the scouts must escape back to Manhattan before everyone is caught in the crossing fire."

[Zeitgeister]

people have nothing better to do at this time, would be my guess. Waiting for Prometheus is getting kind of dull, so "oooooh, explosions" will have to do.

or maybe people just like bad movies. News at fucking eleven.

[Good Job Bob]

Taylor Kitsch redeemed!

[Castor Krieg]

Also, Liam Neeson. He's worth the price of admission alone.

Wrong:

[Pachterballs]

Trailer was flashy. It had that transformer sheen to it and I kid you not, when i saw the roUnd ball aliens, I was sold. Can't wait to see it - so I did. :)

[Derrick01]

Wrong:

I didn't know she was in it though. Hopefully she's dressed like that and not in some military uniform ;)

[Pachterballs]

Taylor Kitsch redeemed!

The new Sam worhtinton. Really bland on screen FYI

He isn't an actor you'd want in a serious acting pic

[Kaizer]

Crossfire up next?

I'm betting on Trouble or Sorry.

[Castor Krieg]

I didn't know she was in it though. Hopefully she's dressed like that and not in some military uniform ;)

http://collider.com/wp-content/uploa...-Batleship.jpg

[Mr_Zombie]

I don't care if it's a dumb action movie, that's basically all I expect from Hollywood nowadays and I'll enjoy it for what it is. Also, Liam Neeson. He's worth the price of admission alone.

He does literally nothing in the movie. Just says a few lines and sits in his ship being completely cut off from the actiony area.

I didn't know she was in it though. Hopefully she's dressed like that and not in some military uniform ;)

The good thing is: she doesn't wear military uniform.
The bad thing is: she doesn't wear a bikini either.
EDIT: Ok, besides that one short scene.

[Gazunta]

I was out for dinner the other night with a group of people and this guy I hadn't met before had just arrived from seeing Battleship and he was trying to get us all to watch the after-dinner showing of Battleship with him so he could watch it again.

The strategy of releasing movies outside of the states first seems is diabolical genius. Nobody pays attention to local reviewers anyway so there's no bad press to worry about and then by the time it opens in the states the US distributors can say it's already made millions so it must be a great movie.

[IpsoFacto]

Wait... they released the movie in international markets 2 weeks before US launch?

OK, that was weird. I went to a screening this afternoon and I went online to see the box office numbers on boxofficemojo.com and I didn't see anything.

Now it makes sense.

Now from what I saw:

It's basically Transformers but without annoying shaky cam, overacting and innapropriate Michael Bay jokes. It's a far more innocent movie in a way.

Taylor Kitsch is the main character. A loser who "joins" the Navy, or rather his big brother forces him to join. The aliens beam in just when they the Navy is doing combat simulations in Hawaii and the hero find himself in charge of one his ship and has to man up in order to save the world.

Good clean Summer fun.

[Zeitgeister]

looking forward to Roger Ebert reviewing this, if he hasn't already.

[Suite Pee]

I was almost considering seeing it until I found out nobody actually says "you sunk my battleship."

[Phoenician_Viking]

The movie would have cost as much to make or more. Let´s not say it´s a success.

[Angry Puppy]

Also, Liam Neeson. He's worth the price of admission alone.

Doesn't his character die early in the movie? Or at least that's what the trailer says.

[Hasardeur]

I apologize for my European brethren, we have a horrible taste when it comes to movies

[HP_Wuvcraft]

This film looks amazing/

Perfect way to make such a ridiculous base concept work.

[Jason Raize '75 - '04]

When the alien ship transforms and levitates over the water, one of the crewmen shouts out "Holy shit. I'm telling you man, its the North Koreans". That is all you need to know about this movie.

[Escape Goat]

"Holy shit. I'm telling you man, its the North Koreans".

That would be my first guess.

[Razgriz-Specter]

Isn't the Japanese Navy also featured in this or are they quickly destroyed?

[Jason Raize '75 - '04]

Isn't the Japanese Navy also featured in this or are they quickly destroyed?

It's based on an international joint Navy exercise/competition akin to Red Flag. Japan is one of the nations represented. But yes, their vessel gets sunk when the fleet encounters the alien ship

[Razgriz-Specter]

It's based on an international joint Navy exercise/competition akin to Red Flag. Japan is one of the nations represented. But yes, their vessel gets sunk when the fleet encounters the alien ship

ok thanks.

[Replicant]

Where's your God now, John Carter?

So I guess it wasn't Kitsch that was the problem with that film.

[Discotheque]

Poor marketing maaaan. John Carter deserves this success. That's a film where I would really enjoy sequels.

[SapientWolf]

When the alien ship transforms and levitates over the water, one of the crewmen shouts out "Holy shit. I'm telling you man, its the North Koreans". That is all you need to know about this movie.

So it's basically Crysis: The Movie?

[Zeitgeister]

So it's basically Crysis: The Movie?

yes, that is actually a very apt description.

Doesn't his character die early in the movie? Or at least that's what the trailer says.

you might say he's not even 'in' the movie. His carrier is outside the dome, thereby being inconsequential to actual developments. It's just a matter of flipping a few scenes, and tada, he lives or tada, he dies.

[Jason Raize '75 - '04]

Also, the film isn't even about a battleship. 90% of the action scenes is the crew using a destroyer. The actual battleship gets 5 minutes screen time at the end

[Hyuga]

Battleship takes in 127 million overseas

Because it's a great popcorn flick!