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ShadowRed
Banned
(05-21-2005, 03:04 AM)
http://www.theregister.co.uk/2005/05...ting_knickers/




The following cautionary tale must surely rate in the top five of "most embarrassing things that can happen to you in public - ever". According to UK tabloid the Sun, a 33-year-old Welsh housewife ended up in hospital after wearing Ann Summers vibrating Passion Pants to her local Asda supermarket in Swansea.

Unfortunately, she became "so aroused by the 2˝-inch vibrating bullet inside that she fainted" then "fell against shelves and banged her head". This prompted the attendance of the paramedics who "found the black leatherette panties still buzzing". Having disabled the orgasmatronic underwear, they then whisked the senseless shopper to hospital where she made a complete recovery. Staff handed her back the Passion Pants upon discharge, discreetly concealed in a plastic bag.

To its credit, the Sun does not name the woman. We assume, however, that she will be shopping at her local Tesco for the next ten years or so, or until everyone in the Asda who witnessed her ordeal is dead or has succumbed to total amnesia - whichever comes soonest.

For the record, Ann Summers notes that Passion Pants are "Not for internal use". Now we know why.
totoro'd
Member
(05-21-2005, 03:06 AM)
totoro'd's Avatar
hmm..i've never had that happen when I wear mine in public, strange...
themadcowtipper
Smells faintly of rancid stilton.
(05-21-2005, 03:08 AM)
themadcowtipper's Avatar
Think of all the times and places she has wore it and not fainted





...thats hawt...
belgurdo
Banned
(05-21-2005, 03:10 AM)
...it's my hentai mangas come to life. Thank you, England
Archaix
Drunky McMurder
(05-21-2005, 03:12 AM)
Archaix's Avatar
There are about four thousand topic titles that you could have chosen which would not only better explain the subject, but also draw more people to read and open the door for endless "witty" jokes.

For shame.
PhlegmMaster
Banned
(05-21-2005, 03:26 AM)

Originally Posted by belgurdo

...it's my hentai mangas come to life. Thank you, England

What's the name of that manga?
ShadowRed
Banned
(05-21-2005, 03:31 AM)

Originally Posted by Archaix

There are about four thousand topic titles that you could have chosen which would not only better explain the subject, but also draw more people to read and open the door for endless "witty" jokes.

For shame.




I'm sorry I couldn't think of one.
Tommie Hu$tle
Member
(05-21-2005, 03:34 AM)

Originally Posted by Archaix

There are about four thousand topic titles that you could have chosen which would not only better explain the subject, but also draw more people to read and open the door for endless "witty" jokes.

For shame.


Agreed, I for one think a better title would have been "Supermarket cUm queen almost dies in aisle 5."
Dilbert
Member
(05-21-2005, 03:35 AM)
Dilbert's Avatar

Originally Posted by Be-Ah-Hui

hmm..i've never had that happen when I wear mine in public, strange...

Thank you for enriching my fantasy life...
Hitman
Edmonton's milkshake attracts no boys.
(05-21-2005, 03:35 AM)
I would have named this thread "PENIS PANTIES FAINT WOMAN!"
themadcowtipper
Smells faintly of rancid stilton.
(05-21-2005, 03:38 AM)
themadcowtipper's Avatar
better title

"Billy Cleanup on aisle 4, bring a mop"
RiZ III
Member
(05-21-2005, 03:41 AM)
RiZ III's Avatar
:lol poor woman
belgurdo
Banned
(05-21-2005, 03:51 AM)

Originally Posted by PhlegmMaster

What's the name of that manga?

The theme of "girl running around in public with something shoved in her" is so overused in hentai that I can't name a single book :lol
speshylives
Member
(05-21-2005, 04:26 AM)
Funnily enough, as I was coming back from work one of my larger, older female coworkers flopped before me and another coworker. We thought it was so odd that she just flopped without reason. Had I known of this, I probably still wouldn't have checked based on the size and age of this wildebeast. However, I will forward this to everyone who witnessed the incident Monday morning with a header of CASE CLOSED.
nitewulf
Banned
(05-21-2005, 04:27 AM)

Originally Posted by Archaix

There are about four thousand topic titles that you could have chosen which would not only better explain the subject, but also draw more people to read and open the door for endless "witty" jokes.

For shame.

i know. i read the title and was like "but why is this news? fainting is not that uncommon".
Alyssa Hu$tle
(05-21-2005, 05:01 AM)
Alyssa Hu$tle's Avatar
Hell, where do I get my hands on one of those?!!
aoi tsuki
(05-21-2005, 07:16 AM)

Originally Posted by Alyssa DeJour

Hell, where do I get my hands on one of those?!!

http://www.annsummers.com/single.asp...cat=8&pid=2673
demon
I don't mean to alarm you but you have dogs on your face
(05-21-2005, 07:17 AM)
demon's Avatar

Originally Posted by aoi tsuki

http://www.annsummers.com/single.asp...cat=8&pid=2673

Haha, she was overcome with excitement!




I don't get it...
GG-Duo
Member
(05-21-2005, 07:19 AM)
GG-Duo's Avatar

Originally Posted by themadcowtipper

better title

"Billy Cleanup on aisle 4, bring a mop"

Bravo.
Macam
Member
(05-21-2005, 08:05 AM)

Originally Posted by aoi tsuki

http://www.annsummers.com/single.asp...cat=8&pid=2673

"Not for internal use"? Isn't that the equivalent of selling a car with the disclaimer "Not for driving"?
aoi tsuki
(05-21-2005, 01:45 PM)

Originally Posted by Macam

"Not for internal use"? Isn't that the equivalent of selling a car with the disclaimer "Not for driving"?

i'm assuming they mean "not to be ingested".
catfish
I have a foreskin yet I do not have AIDS
(05-21-2005, 02:05 PM)
catfish's Avatar
awesome. I'm quite surprised that anyone actually wears pants that get them off while they go shopping though. The women truely are amazing at multi tasking.
aoi tsuki
(05-21-2005, 02:24 PM)

Originally Posted by catfish

awesome. I'm quite surprised that anyone actually wears pants that get them off while they go shopping though. The women truely are amazing at multi tasking.

Well, that's kinda the point of a lot of the smaller sex toys, bullet vibes especially. They're generally discrete and can be worn while doing other things. And you can go out in public and get a rise out of knowing you're the only one who knows what's going on down there, or at least most can. :)
Alyssa Hu$tle
(05-21-2005, 03:07 PM)
Alyssa Hu$tle's Avatar

Originally Posted by catfish

awesome. I'm quite surprised that anyone actually wears pants that get them off while they go shopping though. The women truely are amazing at multi tasking.

I heard of the "Pearl thong" for the first time this year on one of my favorite blog-reads "Dilemmas of a Virgin Slut". She gives a glowing review of it's stimulating qualities.
It's a long post, so let me cut n paste the relevant part...

Finally, let me share with you a bit of private information. What if you are feeling very, very naughty this year, and want her to feel the same? Want to get her a vibrator, but know she will only use it to beat your ass and then throw it in the river? Well I have the answer for you. Get her one of these:
[img=http://img280.echo.cx/img280/4562/lingeriebrasandgiftsb17019ha.th.jpg]
A pearl thong that is. These were first popularised by Samantha in Sex and the City. At the time I couldn’t really see what all the fuss was about. As a matter of fact, all I could see was a pearl wedgie! It looked uncomfortable. Then a few months ago, I happened to come across this Bracli number, and I fell in love with the exquisite lace. It felt so soft, and it looked beautiful, so I thought, “Oh, what the hell! Let me buy one.” A day or so later, it happened to be raining and I was going to put on some dreary rainy day clothes, when I opened up my lingerie drawer and saw this little item. There is nothing like sexy lingerie underneath boring grey clothes to cheer a girl up, so I decided to put it on. Barely had the pearls touched my pearly that I began to feel wet, and all of a sudden I was extremely horny. I had to take it off immediately; I was going someplace where a dripping wet pussy would have been completely inappropriate, and I was also running late, so I had no time for pre-dressing fun. I digress. So if you want to get her something kinky, this is a notch less naughty than a sex toy, but trust me, all she has to do is try it on, and she will love it. Walking in it is another story for another day.

Last edited by Alyssa Hu$tle; 05-21-2005 at 03:14 PM.
themadcowtipper
Smells faintly of rancid stilton.
(05-21-2005, 05:10 PM)
themadcowtipper's Avatar
After thinking about this for awhile(dont' ask me why...), I'm puzzled by how sad one's life most be to not beable to do the most simple of task without masturbating.
aoi tsuki
(05-21-2005, 06:28 PM)

Originally Posted by themadcowtipper

After thinking about this for awhile(dont' ask me why...), I'm puzzled by how sad one's life most be to not beable to do the most simple of task without masturbating.

What if you could get a blowjob anytime you wanted one? Would you say to yourself, "ya know, i really don't want a blowjob while i'm posting on GAF, because that would mean my life is sad"?

On the other other hand, i'm sure there'd be rise in posts like "So... who's getting a blowjob right now?" :lol
bishoptl
(05-21-2005, 10:19 PM)
bishoptl's Avatar
*slowly raises hand*
Tommie Hu$tle
Member
(05-21-2005, 10:31 PM)

Originally Posted by aoi tsuki

What if you could get a blowjob anytime you wanted one? Would you say to yourself, "ya know, i really don't want a blowjob while i'm posting on GAF, because that would mean my life is sad"?

On the other other hand, i'm sure there'd be rise in posts like "So... who's getting a blowjob right now?" :lol

What would be uber-awesome or uber-lame depending would be if you were getting blow job while posting on GAF and using the girls back as your laptop stand

If I could only pull that off.
ConfusingJazz
Member
(05-21-2005, 10:35 PM)
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Originally Posted by Tommie Hu$tle

What would be uber-awesome or uber-lame depending would be if you were getting blow job while posting on GAF and using the girls back as your laptop stand

If I could only pull that off.

You just gave me another goal in life.
ShadowRed
Banned
(05-21-2005, 10:38 PM)

Originally Posted by Tommie Hu$tle

What would be uber-awesome or uber-lame depending would be if you were getting blow job while posting on GAF and using the girls back as your laptop stand

If I could only pull that off.




Tommie what do the chicks look like over there. I've seen a few smoking hot Arab chick where I live I was just wondering if that was the US ones. Have you gotten any since you have been over there?
Tommie Hu$tle
Member
(05-21-2005, 10:54 PM)

Originally Posted by ShadowRed

Tommie what do the chicks look like over there. I've seen a few smoking hot Arab chick where I live I was just wondering if that was the US ones. Have you gotten any since you have been over there?


If you see them in civilian clothes then they are probably Arab women. I mean they range some are hot and some are not. I'm not in an area to be all that close to the Iraqi women. As far as the US women they range as well some are cuteish some are not some have nice bodies and some are average. They meet the health standards that the military puts out for them so they physically they range from 5's to 8's (I haven't seen any 9's and 10's in the body) in the face they range from 1's - 8's

As far as me getting any over here. No, not that I couldn't if I wanted to. You have a lot of young women here that have nothing to do and the women here know that contractors make "alot of money" so it would be realatively easy for me to hit if I REALLY wanted to.

The reason I don't is becasue it comes back on my professionalism. I'm out here for my job not to fuck. If I'm out here poon-chasing it reflects poorly on me and my company so I don't bother with it.

I do know of a whore house in a city called Habbaniya and anyone is welcome to go in and get serviced if they want you just have to becareful of the four snipers that are perched on the buildings.
Socreges
smarter than the average commie
(05-21-2005, 10:55 PM)
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Originally Posted by ShadowRed

I've seen a few smoking hot Arab chick where I live I was just wondering if that was the US ones.

No, just in the US. All the attractive Arab women move to America.
Alyssa Hu$tle
(05-22-2005, 02:05 AM)
Alyssa Hu$tle's Avatar

Originally Posted by themadcowtipper

After thinking about this for awhile(dont' ask me why...), I'm puzzled by how sad one's life most be to not beable to do the most simple of task without masturbating.

I know a girl at work with a clit-ring, who when she positions herself in a certain way on the chair, can get herself off with no hands.
While working at her computer.
That is MAD.
I was impressed anyway.
miyuru
Member
(05-22-2005, 02:37 AM)
GOD I NEED TO GET LAID

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH
The Abominable Snowman
Pure Life tonsil tickle
(05-22-2005, 03:19 AM)
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I can't wait until the Martin Springs 'Bation Boxers come out :D

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