NeoGAF

NotTheGuyYouKill · 04:16 AM

http://io9.com/heres-what-the-hell-t...ding-473029471

Is this new news? I think it's new news.

Wondering what the deal is with the Wachoski siblings' next scifi project Jupiter Ascending? We were too, which is why we're glad Warner Bros. finally released the movie's official synopsis:

Jupiter Jones (Mila Kunis) was born under a night sky, with signs predicting that she was destined for great things. Now grown, Jupiter dreams of the stars but wakes up to the cold reality of a job cleaning toilets and an endless run of bad breaks. Only when Caine (Channing Tatum), a genetically engineered ex-military hunter, arrives on Earth to track her down does Jupiter begin to glimpse the fate that has been waiting for her all along—her genetic signature marks her as next in line for an extraordinary inheritance that could alter the balance of the cosmos.

Mila Kunis cleaning toilets? Oh, come on. I expect my science fiction to have some basis in reality.

At least Mina Kunis might bend over.

KevinCow · (04-16-2013, 04:13 AM)

I'd let Mila Kunis clean my toilet.

Seriously though, it's quite dirty and gross and I don't want to touch it myself.

Jason's Ultimatum · (04-16-2013, 04:14 AM)

Two actors I find annoying........but it is the Wachowskis.

pseudocaesar · (04-16-2013, 04:15 AM)

Originally Posted by NotTheGuyYouKill

At least Mina Kunis might bend over.

Its not like you'd see anything anyway

Spider from Mars · (04-16-2013, 04:16 AM)

I don't want anyone bad mouthing Cloud Atlas or Speed Racer in here!

TrumanBurbank · (04-16-2013, 04:16 AM)

After the awfulness of Cloud Atlas my hype for this is low.

That Jim Broadbent section in Atlas with him escaping the nursing home is one of the worst sequences in film.

NotTheGuyYouKill · (04-16-2013, 04:17 AM)

Originally Posted by pseudocaesar

Its not like you'd see anything anyway

Ice cold

I'll watch if Channing Tatum is in 21 Jump Street AWESOME mode.

UrbanRats · (04-16-2013, 04:17 AM)

I hate Channing Tatum's face, for some reason.

Will watch though.

~Kinggi~ · (04-16-2013, 04:20 AM)

Amazed they are even making another film after Cloud Atlas mega bomb. For the record i really liked CA, but its still interesting to me people recognize their talent when money supposedly rules all.

sfedai0 · (04-16-2013, 04:21 AM)

So its just like the Matrix except the chosen one cleans toilets.

Dead · (04-16-2013, 04:21 AM)

They made Keanu work, so ill reserve judgement on the casting of Tatum

Story synopsis sounds like the groundwork of something cosmic/epic though, which could be amazing

KevinCow · (04-16-2013, 04:23 AM)

Was this the one with animal people? I remember hearing something about animal people, and I was expecting animal people in Cloud Atlas but there weren't any.

Holy Crap · (04-16-2013, 04:24 AM)

Originally Posted by TrumanBurbank

After the awfulness of Cloud Atlas my hype for this is low.

This. The trailers better be fucking hype

Ether_Snake · (04-16-2013, 04:28 AM)

Chosen-one plot:/

NotTheGuyYouKill · (04-16-2013, 04:31 AM)

Originally Posted by Ether_Snake

Chosen-one plot:/

Well, at least it'll make money at the box office, yeah

angular graphics · (04-16-2013, 06:35 PM)

Originally Posted by ~Kinggi~

Amazed they are even making another film after Cloud Atlas mega bomb. For the record i really liked CA, but its still interesting to me people recognize their talent when money supposedly rules all.

Simple. They begged Warner to fully fund CA but WB always responded "no, these movies fail miserably in the box office".

So CA failing does not mean WB lost confidence in them; they are the ones that WARNED them it would fail in the first place.

As far as WB is concerned the Wachowskis only failure so far has been Speed Racer. Could be worse.

Originally Posted by KevinCow

Was this the one with animal people? I remember hearing something about animal people, and I was expecting animal people in Cloud Atlas but there weren't any.

Yes.

Platy · (04-16-2013, 06:37 PM)

The Wachowskis have a thing for actors who can't act .... at least they trow then into roles that usualy fit their lack of acting skills.

Channing Tatum shows no emotions ?
It is because is an alien and aliens show then in a diferent way

Also that synopse looks like the first 10 minutes of the movie

Nerfgun · 06:41 PM

Originally Posted by ~Kinggi~

Amazed they are even making another film after Cloud Atlas mega bomb. For the record i really liked CA, but its still interesting to me people recognize their talent when money supposedly rules all.

Hey, even M. Night Shamalayan keeps getting gigs.

Originally Posted by Platy

The Wachowskis have a thing for actors who can't act .... at least they trow then into roles that usualy fit their lack of acting skills.

Ape Gone Insane · 06:43 PM

I remember reading this synopsis weeks/months ago...?

It said she possessed the same perfect genetic makeup as some universe Queen, who sends the hunter after her. Sounded like the shitty Snow White film.

sans_pants · (04-16-2013, 06:41 PM)

this better have amazing action

harSon · (04-16-2013, 06:42 PM)

Can't wait.

Speed Racer and Cloud Atlas were amazing, and they're at their best when dealing with science fiction.

Salvor.Hardin · (04-16-2013, 06:44 PM)

At a very basic level, it sounds a lot like The Matrix. I'm down for that.

sans_pants · (04-16-2013, 06:46 PM)

also a beautiful toilet cleaner is just fucking stupid

Dragoon En Regalia · (04-16-2013, 06:48 PM)

Can't complain. It's a basic premise, but they've gone places with it before.

angular graphics · (04-16-2013, 06:49 PM)

Originally Posted by Ape Gone Insane

I remember reading this synopsis weeks/months ago...?

It said she possessed the same perfect genetic makeup as some universe Queen, who sends the hunter after her. Sounded like the shitty Snow White film.

Yes, that was an unofficial synopsis from a site (but it was accurate). The official one was released just yesterday.

harSon · (04-16-2013, 06:50 PM)

Originally Posted by sans_pants

also a beautiful toilet cleaner is just fucking stupid

Do people really think that all beautiful individuals are guaranteed a position within society that isn't at the very bottom?

SOUND BOY · (04-16-2013, 06:56 PM)

I am having trouble staying excited about this, due to the Channing Tatum factor...

I absolutely hate him. Hate him. I will need to overcome this, given the movie's potential. But wow. That meathead. Ugh. I'm amazed his brain functions enough to remember his lines. Maybe that is CGI.

Originally Posted by harSon

Do people really think that all beautiful individuals are guaranteed a position within society that isn't at the very bottom?

I observe that, more than think it. Beautiful people, especially women, typically do not need to be at the bottom for any reason.

angular graphics · (04-20-2013, 10:49 AM)

http://ph.omg.yahoo.com/news/bae-doo...072711453.html

“My role in the movie is a very small one,” said the actress. “Compared to Cloud Atlas, I think this new movie will a lot easier and just an enjoyable SF movie.”

Shame.

Ermac · (04-20-2013, 10:52 AM)

Man I'm mad, The Wachowski's were always good with casting lesser known but still good actors in their movies. Tatum and Kunis are two of the most overused actors of the past few years, so many better people could have been cast in this.

Tesseract · (04-20-2013, 10:52 AM)

i just you know, i don't know dawgs, this shit sounds stupid.

Nemesis_ · (04-20-2013, 10:53 AM)

Channing Tatum is just the worst. I understand he is there for the eye candy for some men/women but otherwise I do question why he gets cast in so many things :/

Discotheque · (04-20-2013, 10:57 AM)

Originally Posted by Nemesis_

Channing Tatum is just the worst. I understand he is there for the eye candy for some men/women but otherwise I do question why he gets cast in so many things :/

21 jump street made me like him, dude was hilarious in there. and also magic mike was a pretty good movie.

raindoc · (04-20-2013, 10:58 AM)

Jupiter Jones?

Krev · (04-20-2013, 11:00 AM)

Jupiter Jones is a brutally awesome name.

Guessing they changed Django Wise to Caine after Django Unchained was a hit.

Femmeworth · 11:09 AM

That premise. :\ At least the chosen one being a woman is different, relative to film.

raindoc · (04-20-2013, 11:07 AM)

Originally Posted by Krev

Jupiter Jones is a brutally awesome name.

Guessing they changed Django Wise to Caine after Django Unchained was a hit.

yeah, but it belongs to a little fat kid.

Matt_ · (04-20-2013, 11:07 AM)

Part of this is being filmed at my friends uni
Just a few months after thor 2 was filmed there
Life is not fair.

ComputerMKII · (04-20-2013, 12:33 PM)

Originally Posted by Krev

Jupiter Jones is a brutally awesome name.

Guessing they changed Django Wise to Caine after Django Unchained was a hit.

Alliterative names are tacky.

rocketknight · (04-20-2013, 12:38 PM)

I was hoping the Wachowskis would have been better than gender norm bullshit like a male star unlocking a captive female star's mystical potential, but then I asked myself if it would be even more formulaic for a female star to unlock a captive male star's mystical potential and I couldn't tell. I guess I'll wait it out.

Krev · (04-20-2013, 12:40 PM)

Originally Posted by Computer

Alliterative names are tacky.

I think that's the point.

It's a cheesy pulpy superhero movie/space opera hybrid.

-PXG- · (04-20-2013, 12:57 PM)

Cloud Atlas was dreadful. Mila Kunis is the lead for this?... Yeah.... I'm out before it even started.

Nope.

Slayven · (04-20-2013, 01:29 PM)

Man this sounds like some YA novel aimed at girls.

Black Door · (04-20-2013, 01:38 PM)

Originally Posted by Spider from Mars

I don't want anyone bad mouthing Cloud Atlas or Speed Racer in here!

You won't see me doing that. Cloud Atlas was fucking hot

Femmeworth · (04-20-2013, 01:39 PM)

Originally Posted by Slayven

Man this sounds like some YA novel aimed at girls.

Exactly.

KingofGourds · (04-20-2013, 01:43 PM)

That sounds......uninspired.

It's gonna look good, and the action is going to be amazing, but if that narrative doesn't hold up I'm not gonna be interested. Can't write it off obviously, but I'm certainly not going to be getting hype for this at least until a trailer hits.

Also the whole toilet cleaner thing is some low hanging fruit right there. Kinda lazy.

SJRB · (04-20-2013, 01:51 PM)

Channing Tatum, seriously?

That guy is awful. Even having Mila Kunis can't get me interested in this movie.

SolidusDave · (04-20-2013, 02:07 PM)

Originally Posted by Spider from Mars

I don't want anyone bad mouthing Cloud Atlas or Speed Racer in here!

Too late, I will watch the Cloud Atlas Blu-ray today just in spite of them!

Mikey Jr. · (04-20-2013, 02:19 PM)

This movie sounds terrible. I'm not biased or anything, but nothing about the movie sounds appealing at all. I will wait for the trailer though before I completely write it off. Loved the Matrix movies, so I'm still on board.

Also, Jupiter Jones could be the stupidest name I have heard in a while.

Zabka · (04-20-2013, 02:25 PM)

I remember this being described as a sci-fi Snow White. Not really looking forward to it.

Femmeworth · (04-20-2013, 02:36 PM)

Originally Posted by Zabka

I remember this being described as a sci-fi Snow White. Not really looking forward to it.

What.