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Fucking hell, I think my sister in law wants to smash....

ExpandKong

Banned
Okay OP for real I can help you out here's what you do:

  1. Have your wife invite the sister over for dinner or some shit
  2. Everyone eat and drink and have fun and stay up late
  3. Get super drunk
  4. Get so drunk you "accidentally" go to the guest room with the sister instead of your own room
  5. She will take advantage of the situation and you will enjoy a night of passion unlike you've ever known
  6. Wake up to your wife strangling you
  7. Die
 
Listen. I'm single. Send her my way. Maybe we'll get married and we'll be family and laugh over how Gaf bought us all together in a fucked up way over Xmas dinner!
 

SpartanN92

Banned
Your penis has never seen active duty. You are not permitted to comment on sex and relationships until you lose your V-plates. Be gone child.
You really need to stop making assumptions about people you don't really know. And not like it matters, but yes i have lost my "V-plates", but it doesn't take a genius or a Ron Jeremey to know this is a bad idea for OP.

She goes to another school, you wouldn’t know her. And for your information she has breasts and they feel great. Like 2 sandbags. No I won’t show you a picture of her because I respect women too much. A gentleman never kisses and tells.

And she has a FEMALE penis you bigot.
 

Keihart

Member
I wouldn't be so sure until she grabs your dick.
Since you already like her this might be skewing your perception...
Good luck OP, don't fuck up.
 

Elcid

Banned
This is my wifes sister we talking about here. Wife comes from a good looking family, my wife is deff a stunner but her sister has the slight edge.

So everytime she comes over when my wife isnt paying attention I catch her glancing over at me, smiling and then looking away.

Biggest sign ever was recently my brother in law got a vr system and she asked what it was and I told her and she asked if he had any scary games, so I let her put on the headset and let her walk around the spooky house in re7. Shes never played games before so i told her to move her head around and I'd help her control the sticks by guiding her thumbs across the analogues together and shit. Her tits are massive, pretty close to being D's and she has the controller right by them and every now and then when i was helping her character move in the game she would move it closer to her honkers and slightly move it up and down so my thumb and fingers would graze them often. Standing their at full mast while she playing a horror game and is what makes me think is having me cop a feel every now and then as well as randomly biting her lip.

fucking hell boys, fucking hell. Had an ice cold shower after that one.
Trust me OP, you don't want my advice in this one. Just gone sit this one out.
Also, please see Tit thread. Clearly you don't know what massive is. Cs are not massives. Cs are just BARELY passing the minimum criteria.
 
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Nymphae

Banned
Actually, our apologetic Canadian brethren colloquially measure their height in imperial units, much like many bodily related things, so in this context, I wouldn't be surprised if they also measure dick size in inches.

Nymphae Nymphae cryptoadam cryptoadam JordanN JordanN please confirm or deny my grand theory of Canadian Cock Calculation, or CCC.

Yeah it's common to use feet and inches colloquially, often you'll see CM for height though in certain places, I can't think of an example of where off the top of my head but occasionally I see it and I hate that because no one actually uses it in conversation.
 

Cycom

Banned
Don’t do it, or pursue it in any way.

Remember your vows, you’re married to your wife...she’s not someone to fuck with. When there is adultery you are not only betraying your spouse but also your children.
 

Ionian

Member
The people taking the OP seriously is honestly one of the funniest things about this thread.

And this after he has repeatedly said he wouldn't anyway.

Brilliant thread :D
 
H

hariseldon

Unconfirmed Member
Nah the second OP posts pics TaySan is gonna get the EXIF data and find his wife on Facebook and rat him out for the crime of sexy thoughts.
And then set fire to his house while furiously wanking off his micropenis with a set of tweezers.
 

Tevious

Member
GAF be like:
2b9bf610908e2a43f4cfb8ab60ce1c5b.jpg
 
Some of y'all have never chosen the devil's path in this kinda situation and it shows.

1) If you have sex with her, it will be absolutely incredible the first times.

2) It will never be worth it and will never work out. There's no good relationship built from such a bad origin. It will completely ruin your life, your self-esteem, your relationships and be an overall black mark on your spirit. If you needed a wake up call in your life, though, this would be an opportunity for one!

3) She's 10000000% doing this to make her husband jealous and/or get herself excited by flirting with a man she finds attractive (you, OP, congrats, but also its likely she finds you attractive because you are like your brother) but either way you are simply being used by her as an idealized approximation of what she wishes her real-life husband could be.

just FYI!
 

nush

Member
If they were *bigger* than D's you wouldn't say "pretty close to being D's" though. So they're smaller than D, which means they're definitely not close to being double Ds.

Gosh, it's like you aren't even a bra size afficionado.

Pretty close has a +/- tolerance. Maybe OP is just humble bragging.

We need pics to settle this!
 

Texas Pride

Banned
Since the sister was the one you wanted originally I kinda feel like you have to do her at some point bcs it was meant to be. You won't know until you jump in there.
 

Thaedolus

Gold Member
OP just needs to be honest and then start small by testing the waters like hey this girl in marketing wants to smash how we feeling on the open relationship thing people do these days? I mean not because I want to smash just because I heard they’re doing that these days. No not for us babe look she...she added me on Snapchat it’s fine right? Hello? Couch tonight?

See how that goes before blowing up her sister’s nethers
 
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Porcile

Member
Blindfolded blowie. Easy to hide the evidence and she won't be able to see your tiny todger too. Win-win.
 
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F

Foamy

Unconfirmed Member
Only way to pull this off is to get drunk, call her your wife's name, and initiate sex.
If she rats you out or you get caught you can claim you were so drunk you thought she was your wife.
 

Kamina

Golden Boy
You don't understand male heterosexuality?
Dude, do you only ever read the first few words or is it a comprehension problem?
OP is obsess with his wife’s sisters boobs, but all that energy could go into sex with his wife instead.
I fail to see how this is contradicting heterosexuality. Unless your definition of heterosexuality is constantly longing after the forbidden fruit.
 

Nikana

Go Go Neo Rangers!
Actually, our apologetic Canadian brethren colloquially measure their height in imperial units, much like many bodily related things, so in this context, I wouldn't be surprised if they also measure dick size in inches.

Nymphae Nymphae cryptoadam cryptoadam JordanN JordanN please confirm or deny my grand theory of Canadian Cock Calculation, or CCC.

Well that's just insane. Pick a lane and stay in it. Jeeze cananda.
 

VN1X

Banned
You know things are bad when you cant distinguish the incels from the chads any more as both types of groups couldn't be more cringy if they tried... "smash that pussy" lmao. :messenger_tears_of_joy:
 

Cutty Flam

Banned
1998...(sighs) I'll never forget it. It was the year when these grisly murders occured in the Arklay Mountains. Soon after, the news was out to the whole world revealing that it was the fault of a secret viral experiment conducted by the international
pharmaceutical enterprise, Umbrella. The virus broke out in a nearby mountain community, Raccoon City. And hit the peaceful little town with a devastating blow crippling its very foundation. Not taking any chances, the President of the United States ordered a contingency plan - to sterilize Raccoon City. With the whole affair gone public, the United States government issued an indefinite suspension of business decree to Umbrella. Soon its stock prices crashed and for all intents and purposes Umbrella was finished. Six years had passed since that horrendous incident...
 

ExpandKong

Banned
1998...(sighs) I'll never forget it. It was the year when these grisly murders occured in the Arklay Mountains. Soon after, the news was out to the whole world revealing that it was the fault of a secret viral experiment conducted by the international
pharmaceutical enterprise, Umbrella. The virus broke out in a nearby mountain community, Raccoon City. And hit the peaceful little town with a devastating blow crippling its very foundation. Not taking any chances, the President of the United States ordered a contingency plan - to sterilize Raccoon City. With the whole affair gone public, the United States government issued an indefinite suspension of business decree to Umbrella. Soon its stock prices crashed and for all intents and purposes Umbrella was finished. Six years had passed since that horrendous incident...

d3e.png
 
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