I was writing from a phone last night, so my thoughts were a bit rushed and random.
But you said you were 35/36 really rang a bell for me.
Public forum exclusive....I lost my virginity at 34. (you can all laugh, I can take it). I was the nearly 35 year old Virgin.
Wasn't through want of trying, but I'd had bad cystic Acne since I was 15. I'm talking really bad, that shreds any ounce of confidence you have. But as the years went on, the treatments got better so did my skin and so did my confidence.
35 onwards was non-stop partying and shagging to make up for lost time. I can't remember the names or the faces of most of them. Get the Manscaping kit out, refresh your wardrobe, treat yourself to a luxury cologne and keep your Dog, if she doesn't like your Dog, John Wick her arse!. Paint your pad for a new look, give everything in your life a spring clean. 35 onwards...you are going to KILL IT!
But the most important advice I can give you, or anyone is that life really is like a box of Forrest Gump's Chocolates.
My highs and lows:
20s - Mother died suddenly of cancer. 6 months later my Dad hanged himself in grief. And fuck me, it doesn't get any worse than walking in and finding your Dad dead that way. I didn't work for 5 years. I was too destroyed. Pro-Tip: If you ever have a life-changing experience like that and need to cover a period on your CV, don't come up with bollocks like you were travelling overseas, just do what I did and say you had your own business and pay someone to make a professional website for that business and register the company.
Other than those dreadful events the only thing I did of any interest was partaking in console wars on NeoGaf. If anyone remembers the green Xbox dancing Bananas, that was me. For someone who loves clubbing I missed out on the prime era of 90's / 00's dance which does make me sad sometimes.
30s - finally had my epiphany I was wasting my life and went to a social meet up for single people in London. I remember that day, it totally changed my life, I'd booked a place but decided that I wasn't going to go. Who would want to be friends with a loser like me. But as luck would have it I'd been clothes shopping that and decided to walk home in the evening...which took me right past the venue where this social event was taking place....nah...walked past, but a little naggy bird on my shoulder told me to go back. Best decision I ever made. I made friends who I'm still friends with today. It was in Farringdon, two scousers persuaded me to go to Fabric next door, I ditched the shopping and ended up stumbling out at 7.00am the next morning. It changed my life! From then on met loads of new people, made loads of new friends. The Caterpillar really did become the Butterfly.
40s - Got married twice. Got divorced twice. Got taken to hospital three times for drug overdoses, including technically dying in the ambulance when my heart stopped. In retrospect, I probably was trying too hard to make up for lost time. I note you said you don't want to turn to drink or drugs, stick with that decision. Don't get me wrong, if you're going clubbing, there's nothing wrong with a cheeky tag-along from Mandy, but everything else will drain your money and fuck your brain up. Stay clean. Stay healthy. The worst stuff I've been clean from for a year now, a year this month. But as anyone who saw my ridiculous Crystal Meth post, once in the drug world, it's always there as a grim temptation. Had the best job ever. Got sacked from the best job ever, in retrospect, probably because I wasn't thinking straight because of the drugs. If you think certain friends are a drain and dragging you down, they probably are. And a whole lot of clubbing. I must have danced to the Moon and back in steps and I loved every moment of it.
50s - A lot of reflection. Happiness and disappointment.
Would have kids changed my life? Probably not, I'm too selfish. I barely have enough time for the PS5 as it is.
Should I have treated my wives differently? Wife No.1 definitely. Wife No.2 no.
Could I have put more effort into furthering my career? Absolutely. But here's the thing, I like being a backroom boy. Pay me to 9 to 5. I'll do your shit and I'll do it well. But kissing arse and brown-nosing to get up the ladder, that's not me. And I hate meetings.
This takes me to today. Started week on a high very happy, ending it on a low of I made a mistake at work that's put me in the firing line. Somewhat unfairly given the nature of the work. Those Forrest Gump chocolates man...
I'd highly recommend meetup.com -
https://www.meetup.com/ - join a local walking group, there's always some filthy fanny on those.
I take it from your vernacular you from the UK? Sounds like it's time for a NeoGAF UK Summit.
We all meet up, a place with the best ladies (Manchester girls man...Manchester girls), drink, get merry, go to a bar or club and get you all wingman'ed up.
You can pretend to be my Son and you can wingman me the girls who like a cute older Dad figure. It's a win. win.
[eyes wide open]
