• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.

EGM got here quick this month

A

Amir0x

Banned
Why is "hard" a con in Fire Emblem review anyway? Being difficult is not really a con. Now, if the difficulty is forced due some arbitrary game feature, if the difficult has a shitty ramp up, if the difficulty is not balanced then it may be a con. But being challenging is never a con in of itself.
 
S

spwolf

Member
Amir0x said:
Why is "hard" a con in Fire Emblem review anyway? Being difficult is not really a con. Now, if the difficulty is forced due some arbitrary game feature, if the difficult has a shitty ramp up, if the difficulty is not balanced then it may be a con. But being challenging is never a con in of itself.
Click to expand...

:D
 
K

Kintaro

Worships the porcelain goddess
Soul4ger said:
Uncharted
Pros: Gunplay, acrobatics, charming characters
Cons: Not much original, lame puzzles
Click to expand...

If that's all they got for the cons, this game is GOLD BABY! WOOOOOOOOOO! I'm so hot for this game.

btw, I'm going to re-do the scores in the 1up/EGM scale.

Mario and sonic olympics: Good, Good, Good
Geometry wars galaxies: Good, Good, Good
Fire Emblem: Excellent, Excellent, Good
Need For speed pro street: Good, Good, Good
tony hawk: Average, Average, Good
Manhunt 2: Bad, Average, Good
CoD 4: Excellent, Good, Excellent
Blacksite Area 51: Average, Average, Average
Kane and Lynch: Good, Good, Good
Uncharted: Good, Good, Good
naruto 360: Average, Good, Average
timeshift: Average, Average, Average
mass effect: Excellent, Excellent, Excellent
contra 4: Good, Good, Good
cooking mama 2: Good, Good, Good
ffxii: revenant wings: Good, Good, Average
MGS: PO: Good, Good, Good

There. This help everyone out? Clean some rocks out of the anuses?
 
Z

Z3F

Banned
Amir0x said:
Why is "hard" a con in Fire Emblem review anyway? Being difficult is not really a con. Now, if the difficulty is forced due some arbitrary game feature, if the difficult has a shitty ramp up, if the difficulty is not balanced then it may be a con. But being challenging is never a con in of itself.
Click to expand...

I think the non-hardcore gamers would like to know if a game's too hard before they put down $50 to $60.
 
A

Amir0x

Banned
Z3F said:
I think the non-hardcore gamers would like to know if a game's too hard before they put down $50 to $60.
Click to expand...

i think those non-gamers can fuck themselves up the ass, the game has a god-damn easy setting. Which is mind numbingly easy!
 
P

painful fart

Member
Gigglepoo said:
1up gave Ratchet an 8.5 also.

And to GeoramA, since all three reviewers gave Uncharted an 8.5, 1up will as well.
Click to expand...
1Up will never ever give a PS3 exclusive a score of nine or above, it´s in their job description. If they did that would result in an instant sack.

Sony should learn how to buy reviewers, they are no different from any prostitutes, Sony just need to collaborate with the right pimps/publishers just like Microsoft.
 
J

J-Rzez

Member
Amir0x said:
Why is "hard" a con in Fire Emblem review anyway? Being difficult is not really a con. Now, if the difficulty is forced due some arbitrary game feature, if the difficult has a shitty ramp up, if the difficulty is not balanced then it may be a con. But being challenging is never a con in of itself.
Click to expand...

That's another one of the things I don't listen to in reviews. It's all subjective. Maybe hard to them is easy to another, or someone is looking for said challenge. Price is another one of those things. But unfortunately, it doesn't work all the same amongst the clans at these places. For example, Warhawk losing a point because of it's cost, but nobody deducted points off of Crysis costing you an arm and a leg to get it to run at the screenshot/advertising video quality, or that you have to play it on the Pentagon's nuclear powered mainframe that they don't think I know they have.
 
A

Amir0x

Banned
guys i think the problem is that before 1up was giving all these 360 games 9.0s, because they hadn't got rid of their Microsoft Mafia yet. chespace and Luke were still reviewing games, and so obviously the 360 games were getting unfairly high scores.

Now that the Microsoft Mafia is largely gone, the 1up reviewers left behind are just the level headed types so it seems like in comparison 1up is prone to giving PS3 games unfair scores, but in reality if these level headed types were reviewing the shitty 360 launch games, for example, they would have had 7.0's and shit.

How's that for a conspiracy theory?
 
S

Segata Sanshiro

Member
painful fart said:
1Up will never ever give a PS3 exclusive a score of nine or above, it´s in their job description. If they did that would result in an instant sack.

Sony should learn how to buy reviewers, they are no different from any prostitutes, Sony just need to collaborate with the right pimps/publishers just like Microsoft.
Click to expand...
Everyday Shooter and Ninja Gaiden Sigma both got nines.
 
moai

moai

Member
painful fart said:
1Up will never ever give a PS3 exclusive a score of nine or above, it´s in their job description. If they did that would result in an instant sack.

Sony should learn how to buy reviewers, they are no different from any prostitutes, Sony just need to collaborate with the right pimps/publishers just like Microsoft.
Click to expand...

are you serious?

nice scores all around. should be a great time for gamers.

:D
 
B

Big-E

Member
Amir0x said:
guys i think the problem is that before 1up was giving all these 360 games 9.0s, because they hadn't got rid of their Microsoft Mafia yet. chespace and Luke were still reviewing games, and so obviously the 360 games were getting unfairly high scores.

Now that the Microsoft Mafia is largely gone, the 1up reviewers left behind are just the level headed types so it seems like in comparison 1up is prone to giving PS3 games unfair scores, but in reality if these level headed types were reviewing the shitty 360 launch games, for example, they would have had 7.0's and shit.

How's that for a conspiracy theory?
Click to expand...

I was blind, but now I see, you made a believer out of me.
 
R

reilo

learning some important life lessons from magical Negroes
Amir0x said:
guys i think the problem is that before 1up was giving all these 360 games 9.0s, because they hadn't got rid of their Microsoft Mafia yet. chespace and Luke were still reviewing games, and so obviously the 360 games were getting unfairly high scores.

Now that the Microsoft Mafia is largely gone, the 1up reviewers left behind are just the level headed types so it seems like in comparison 1up is prone to giving PS3 games unfair scores, but in reality if these level headed types were reviewing the shitty 360 launch games, for example, they would have had 7.0's and shit.

How's that for a conspiracy theory?
Click to expand...

Hint: Read 1Up's Gears of War review. First paragraph, really. Then look at the score given.
 
S

Soul4ger

Member
I'm back. The Contra IV review, all the reviewers agree that it feels like a lost 16-bit Contra sequel warped forward through time. Shane's only complaint is unavoidable deaths because of the screen gap. The second reviewer agrees slightly, saying there are sometimes snipers and stuff POSITIONED in the gap, and you can't even see THEM. But he says the challenges are awesome, and by completing them you can
unlock several other, classic Contra games
. Sam, the third reviewer, says the game is great, and you can LEARN to avoid the blind spots.

GodfatherX said:
just curious, whats on the cover?
Click to expand...

The cover is another "OMG LOOK AT HOW MANY GAMES THERE ARE AVAILABLE NOW AND HOW MANY ARE COMING NEXT YEAR." It features a buyer's guide for Christmas (absolutely worthless), a look at the games that got pushed back to next year and whether their delays were worth it (they say Too Human is a success), and then.. The reviews are the third part of the feature. Totally lame.
 
R

rollingstart

Banned
I got my EGM way before this thread was posted, I was waiting to get home and see if there will be a reaction to the Uncharted scores, hopefully there isnt a big reaction to them.
 
V

Visualante

Member
I think it shows a distinct lack of dedication in Sony's first party lineup when their defense force thinks their games won't get over a 9. Team ICO, Polyphony Digital and Studio Liverpool all deliver games that 1UP liked.
 
L

Loudninja

Member
Linkzg said:
I got my EGM way before this thread was posted, I was waiting to get home and see if there will be a reaction to the Uncharted scores, hopefully there isnt a big reaction to them.
Click to expand...

Naw, whats the pros and cons?
 
J

Jenga

Banned
Amir0x said:
guys i think the problem is that before 1up was giving all these 360 games 9.0s, because they hadn't got rid of their Microsoft Mafia yet. chespace and Luke were still reviewing games, and so obviously the 360 games were getting unfairly high scores.

Now that the Microsoft Mafia is largely gone, the 1up reviewers left behind are just the level headed types so it seems like in comparison 1up is prone to giving PS3 games unfair scores, but in reality if these level headed types were reviewing the shitty 360 launch games, for example, they would have had 7.0's and shit.

How's that for a conspiracy theory?
Click to expand...
you need to add more personal insults and other tinfoil theories like bill gates spooning with luke and chespace on hot summer nights
 
N

neojubei

Will drop pants for Sony.
Visualante said:
Pros
A variety of approaches to combat situations
Surreal graphics
Awesome environment puzzles

Cons
Environments lack variety
Characters are lifeless
Drawn out fetch quests and babysitting
Click to expand...


After playing the demo and watching the 10 mins video, I have to call this FAKE!!!

edit: yup fake.
 
S

Speevy

Banned
I hope Unreal Tournament 3 makes this year on the PS3. That way, it can get a 9.5 in anticipation of its Xbox 360 iteration months later.
 
S

Soul4ger

Member
You know, I've never wanted to kill myself more than when I've read through the responses to the fake pros and cons AFTER I POSTED THE REAL ONES. People are so dumb. Somebody save humanity, please. ;_;
 
S

Soul4ger

Member
Linkzg said:
The Good:
-Gunplay, acrobatics, charming characters.

The Bad:
-Not much original here
-lame puzzles

Sixaxis controls:
-let's not even bother
Click to expand...

Posted it two pages ago... Oh, well.
 
R

rollingstart

Banned
Soul4ger said:
Posted it two pages ago... Oh, well.
Click to expand...

im not going to read through this entire thread to answer this guys question, its quicker to read and type it.

the only thing I found funny about any review was "Where's the story?" under Bad for MGS Portable Ops Plus.
 
U

Uncle

Member
Soul4ger said:
You know, I've never wanted to kill myself more than when I've read through the responses to the fake pros and cons AFTER I POSTED THE REAL ONES. People are so dumb. Somebody save humanity, please. ;_;
Click to expand...


With what classes did the reviewers of ME have problems?
 
M

Maxwell House

Member
painful fart said:
1Up will never ever give a PS3 exclusive a score of nine or above, it´s in their job description. If they did that would result in an instant sack.

Sony should learn how to buy reviewers, they are no different from any prostitutes, Sony just need to collaborate with the right pimps/publishers just like Microsoft.
Click to expand...
:lol :lol

This thread is gold.

What are you going to say next year when 1up gives MGS4 a 9.5 or 10? MS must have stopped sending them hookers, right??
 
B

BenjaminBirdie

Banned
Jenga said:
Impossible.
Click to expand...

Yeah, but even if, that's a really small segment of the population interested in it (4 to 6?) not to mention a lot of them might not even buy it (reviewer copies) and I think Garnett even said he got an LE for free. So it's not looking good, sales wise. The dude is right.
 
P

painful fart

Member
Segata Sanshiro said:
Everyday Shooter and Ninja Gaiden Sigma both got nines.
Click to expand...
Since Ninja Gaiden Sigma was a remake of a critically acclaimed Xbox exclusive I guess they thought they were obliged to give it a 9.

It will be interesting to see what score the PS3 version of Lost Planet will recieve.

Everyday Shooter: beats me, maybe they don´t believe it will stay an exclusive.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.

Similar threads

What was the most recent game in each of these hallowed franchises that you finished?
27
871
Gojiira replied
Games you have finished this year?
2
52
2K
Heimdall_Xtreme replied
Rate the games you played in 2021
47
2K
FluffShake replied
EDGE #393 reviews and GOTY AWARDS
Opinion News Hype 2
77
6K
DenchDeckard replied
Super Mario Wonder takes No.1 spot from Spider-Man 2 | UK Boxed Charts
Sales-Age 2
71
5K
Maestr0 replied
Top Bottom