Gaydar: how does it work?

[Leonard Washington]

Are there any people of the gay on here or did they all migrate to Era? If so I have a question for you:

Whats the deal with gaydar?

Like for real, how does it work? How do you "just know"? Is it real or just marketing hype to tempt people across to the team like "Come for the psychic senses, stay for buttsex/rubber peni"?

Psychic powers in general seem to be one taboo subject because they are either met with trolly/tinfoil responses or discarded out of hand and yet there is a select group that this very power is associated with and it makes you wonder what the deal is.

 

[Forthefuture]

I think it would be better if we didnt further dehumanize and marginalize gay people by attributing supernatural powers to them. At best it is a tongue-in-cheek expression that is not to be taken too seriously. Like womans intuition.

 

[jdforge]

It’s probably about noticing nuances or a sense of familiarity or commonality with someone that simultaneously gives you tingles in your ball sack. Yep, that’s it.

 

[EviLore]

Don't conflate ESP with intuition. The important things to understand are that:

1) Men have high testosterone and have to proactively seek out partners in most cases.

2) Gay guys have to figure out to a high degree of accuracy who is gay/bi and who is straight. Making the wrong judgment call there can not only be awkward; it can be dangerous in some cultures or hurtful to someone you misread as being gay, depending on the other person's worldview and potential insecurity and maturity level of course.

3) Social elements like certain mannerisms or the "lisp" are learned behaviors to signal between people in the gay community to make this less of a hassle.

 

[JimboJones]

Are there any people of the gay on here or did they all migrate to Era? If so I have a question for you:

Whats the deal with gaydar?

Like for real, how does it work? How do you "just know"? Is it real or just marketing hype to tempt people across to the team like "Come for the psychic senses, stay for buttsex/rubber peni"?

Psychic powers in general seem to be one taboo subject because they are either met with trolly/tinfoil responses or discarded out of hand and yet there is a select group that this very power is associated with and it makes you wonder what the deal is.

Lol it's not taboo at all it's just most people realise it's a fantasy and don't have that much interest in talking about it seriously.
It's dismissed with very good reason as it's been debunked over and over again.

 

[RokkanStoned]

Stereotypes and actively playing into them. Then you have body language, speech and eye contact that might also indicate someone being interested in someone of the same gender. This isn't foolproof as many people manage to mix up signs of friendship with signs of romantic or sexual interest. In general the whole "gaydar" thing also works by the former things, together with just generally applying it to a lot of people and being right a number of times and using the exceptions either as denials or ignoring them. Kind of validating itself.

That said, stereotypes is a big thing. I know this because my brother who came out as gay completely changed his mannerisms once he came out, playing into the stereotype. I guess it's also functions as a way to safely identify fellow gay people and show that you're interested in men. It might also be that as an aggregate gay men are more effeminate and gay women are more masculine, though I would imagine that's mostly because of the stereotypes and because of gender roles being more complicated.

 

[Leonard Washington]

Will you mods make up your darn minds?

Last time I got bitched at for having “not enough info in my title” and was told that it should “convey everything about the OP clearly in one line” and thus psychic homosexuals it was but nope, now you’d think we’re talking about magnets.

Magnets. How do they work?

 

[SLoWMoTIoN]

Will you mods make up your darn minds?

Last time I got bitched at for having “not enough info in my title” and was told that it should “convey everything about the OP clearly in one line” and thus psychic homosexuals it was but nope, now you’d think we’re talking about magnets.

Magnets. How do they work?

Hey friend perhaps your thread isn't smart enough like this one. https://www.neogaf.com/threads/why-are-lions-classified-as-cats.1463484/#post-253323414

It has nothing to do with the title.

 

[ssolitare]

A lot of times it's about the way that you look at someone and exchange eye contact with them.

When you exchange longer glances, catch then looking at you multiple times, and/or look at you a certain way and you respond back, that's someone that you should approach.

Considering that guys are more aggressive on avg when it comes to finding mates, well then, you learn faster.

 

[ipukespiders]

I think it's kinda like water divining (dowsing) except with the penis.

 

[Liberty4all]

I think that radar exists for BOTH straight and gay men tbh.

 

[TrainedRage]

My GAYdar usually manifests from seeing physical gestures or hearing vocal inflections. Kinda hard to tell by "just looking".

 

[LegendOfKage]

2) Gay guys have to figure out to a high degree of accuracy who is gay/bi and who is straight. Making the wrong judgment call there can not only be awkward; it can be dangerous in some cultures or hurtful to someone you misread as being gay, depending on the other person's worldview and potential insecurity and maturity level of course.

3) Social elements like certain mannerisms or the "lisp" are learned behaviors to signal between people in the gay community to make this less of a hassle.

That reminds me of this video, which I thought was both interesting and fairly humorous:

 

[<+)O Robido O(+>]

Its not that hard. There's always a tell. Straight people aren't usually looking for it so they don't see it unless its its a flamer or a butch lez. I stopped editing myself in front of straights decades ago and I still get a shocked expressions whenever I "come out." I think I'm fairly obvious.

 

[I'm new be nice]

There are actually algorithms that can reliably determine someones sexuality by a photograph alone.

So it must be a real thing. All my gay friends tell me I don't have gaydar though. Nobody ever pegs me for gay on first meeting either, so maybe there is a correlation there.

 

[Ancient Gray]

As a straight man, I've never had to worry much about who is gay and who isn't. My severe lack of concern over this issue has served me well.

 

[Kadayi]

Its not that hard. There's always a tell. Straight people aren't usually looking for it so they don't see it unless its its a flamer or a butch lez. I stopped editing myself in front of straights decades ago and I still get a shocked expressions whenever I "come out." I think I'm fairly obvious.

You'd be amazed how much we just don't register. Generally, whenever anyone I've known has come out my standard response has been this: -

In truth though, I don't find sex or preferences comes up that much as a topic in general conversation these days (mayhap a reflection of both age and a more politically charged PC culture), so I don't think it's that surprising that people are largely oblivious to others persuasions outside of their close friends.

 

[Leonard Washington]

Soooo, no psychic powers then?

Boo-urns!