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How did 2020 screw, fuck or break you?

Ma-Yuan

Member
Well this for many people horrible year comes to an end. And I want to share what it had in store for me. I have to admit not all was bad but it started really bad and ended on high note so far. I hope the last days have no more surprises for me.

In January my best friend attempted suicide because his wife left him. This was on the 9th which I could prevent with one of his coworkers.

On the 27th he succesfully commited suicide. I tried to get him to an institution that could help him but was not successful. He was also able to release him self out of psychiatric care directly after 9th. Unfortunately he was a quiet good liar I have to admit. He fooled the shrinks and me twice. I dearly miss him. He has a daughter that was 3 years old at that time :(

Later on came the stupid lock down which I guess was the same for everyone, but being home with two kids back then (one 3 years old and one starting with 5 months) and the obligation to work was horrible.

We had to cancel our April vacation to Thailand so my parents in law couldn't see their second grandchild. We postponed it to October but the same . . . flights were cancled. My wife hasn't seen her parents in person close to two years now. She is getting really depressed about it.

In September a good colleague from work suddenly died from a heart attack.

Also in September my company started reorganizing and informed us that 30% of the staff from HQ will have to leave until the end of the year. (I didn't have to . . . lucky me but more to this later)

In October my uncle had i think his third heart attack but since he has more luck then brains he survived again. But he is still due for another surgery which was postponed to next year and you guess it right because of our favorit virus. I hope all goes well until then.

In November I found out that my old team will be resurrected at work (after the 30% of the staff left . . . don't ask me why . . .). It was merged with another team at the beginning of the year. This resulted in me not getting the promotion I was in my humble opinion due to get (stupid trainings and evaluations lead me to be leave i was due :D ). Instead I got a fancy new title that gave me nearly all the tasks of a team leader but with no money perks at all . . . On the 17th of December I finally found out that I will lose that fancy title and wont become team leader instead a former very good friend of mine at work will get this position. He always claimed not to be interested in this position and was cheering me up to get it. He had a special role or position that was canned due to the restructure so he got mine instead and I was demoted . . . within less of a year. (Happened to all current team leaders in my department and I -_- so at least I am not alone with this fate).
The issue is that the guy knew since more then 4 years that i tried to get this position . . . And he didn't have the guts to tell me that he somehow managed to snag it away in front of me. He told me 5minutes before the official announcement . . . I thought that was the final blow for this year because I really could have used this promotion and raise in salary that comes with it . . .

But then my father thought hold my beer I can end 2020 on a higher note. On the 20th of December he had stroke . . . a blood vessel bursted. He is still alive but I haven't seen him since because of this fucking covid virus and those shit fucking rules. He is completly paralyzed on the left hemisphere and can barely speak a word. He still has is skull opened to lower the presure by releasing brain fluid. And his chances to survive the next year are not in his favor. My mom would only be allowed to visit him if he is diying or see his corpse if she can't be there in time. Since we can't see him don't know how he is doing or even looks now and he is at the complete mercy of those people who I can not trust if I never met them. Yesterday one doctor basically destroyed all hope for my mum saying his bloodpresure is still to high and they have issues stabalizing it. They also fear his brain will get infected since he needs his skull to be open for so long. Also chances to get out of this shit get drastically lower if you have no support from your family and right now we can't give it to him. These idiots havent even set up the wifi for the phone we gave him so at least they could turn on a video call and my mum and I could see him. If we are lucky they bring a normal phone to him and we can talk to him for 5 minutes but yesterday they always claimed to have no time. So he hasn't heared anything since sunday from us.

So this was 2020 in a nutshell for me :( I hope your 2020 was better then mine and next year will be all good for us and this stupid covid bullshit will end.
 
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The start of the year was a bit rocky for me, since 2019 was one of the worst years of my life, and that carried over a bit into 2020.
After the initial shock of lockdowns going into summer time, it was a quite decent year for me, though.

Wish your life for you and your relatives and friends to be a whole lot better than this one, though, OP.
 
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Cattlyst

Member
You've had a shit year OP. Hopefully better times to come. Likewise my job turned to utter shit and I lost a parent to Covid, couldn't have a proper funeral due to the rules etc. Hobbies (other than gaming) gone to shit, haven't seen friends or family for what seems like a lifetime, barely leave the house any more. Waiting for this vaccine to show us a light at the end of this tunnel but not very optimistic.
 
Work was really stressful all year, but my job is safe and sound. Various family members had COVID scares or mild cases (including me and my partner), but everyone survived. It's been a pretty boring year with no restaurants, theatres and such for most of the year, but I actually managed to get the most out of it all things considered, since I did manage a quick holiday in August and I bought a new gaming PC and the new Xbox consoles this year. It was not a good year, but given the circumstances it could have gone a lot worse. Sorry to hear your story OP, sounds like your year would have been nightmare-ish even without COVID-19. If you ever need to vent, we're here.
 

highrider

Banned
Sucks OP. My income has been cut in half, a lot of my friends in restaurants are on their ass. I known quite a few people that have gotten Covid but they’ve all recovered quickly including some I would consider high risk.
 

Kev Kev

Member
It didn’t

My Dad almost died from Covid and he’s back to normal now. In Florida, we’ve mostly kept things open and people haven’t been losing their god damned minds (no eating through a mask or wearing hazmat suits in public). I adapted to wearing a mask when necessary, gyms and bars are opened back up (don’t have to wear a mask at the gym of course), family gatherings went off as normal (no masks or social distancing) and no one has gotten sick including my 80 year old grandfather... I could keep going but you get the idea. Everything is fine, just have to wear a mask at the grocery store basically.

People say Florida has been the worst about the pandemic but mostly everyone I know has been doing the same as me and, well, everything seems to be fine. I even deliver to people at retirement and nursing homes (with a mask on of course) and none of them have passed away or gotten sick. They always seem happy to see me because I have food and a smile lol. I feel for people who have lost loved ones or had their lives uprooted. I’ve seen tons of businesses close down, so I know there are people affected around here, just no one I know. Just nothing that has directly affected me or anyone I know. Guess I’ve been lucky (except for my Dad... that was scary).

Only thing was my cousin was shot and killed by a stray bullet. He was engaged and only 29 😞 and my other cousin who was born with a birth defect died from a heart attack in the shower (he lived about 35 years longer than they expected). I’ve experienced some crippling anxiety and depression, but I’ve overcome it. It’s been rough, but it hasn’t broken me, and I won’t let it.
 
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nush

Member
Sucks OP. My income has been cut in half, a lot of my friends in restaurants are on their ass. I known quite a few people that have gotten Covid but they’ve all recovered quickly including some I would consider high risk.

My income zeroed, but my parents (divorced) both donated me their holiday 2020 funds. Special no thanks Covid and conversely thanks Covid!
 

EviLore

Expansive Ellipses
Staff Member
Sorry about your 2020 Ma-Yuan Ma-Yuan . Here's to a much better 2021 ahead.

On my end I just look to make the most of the circumstances and focus on GAF rebuilding, staying active, learning, and music. On a positive track on all fronts there, and haven't lost any family or friends to Covid thankfully.
 

INC

Member
Lost my uncle
Wasn't able to se my mum over Xmas
My family from Oz couldn't visit

About it, so I guess overall I've been lucky, others have it far worse than me
 

FunkMiller

Gold Member
My mother had cancer surgery, my best friend lost his grandfather to covid, two of my work colleagues lost relatives to covid as well, I've been stuck working from home for months in a major city with Covid everywhere, couldn't get back to see anyone in Australia, my tinnitus has been off the charts bad, and I wasted fifty quid on Cyberpunk 2077.

My... 2020 really is the gift that keeps on giving.
 
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Calcium

Banned
My wife and I had a lot of plans that just died when the pandemic hit. We were going to have a great year, but in the face of how horrific 2020 has been it's hard to be bothered by it. We'll see what 2021 holds.
 
One of my cats died a month ago, which sucked. But i knew he wouldnt get old.
The plandemic doesnt affect me, for now. Still work, same money even during lockdown. But gym is closed and i cant see Mother Merkill let it open before May.
Still to this day i know none directly who had covid and in my company with 350 people only a handful were in quarantine.
 

FunkMiller

Gold Member
Sorry about your 2020 Ma-Yuan Ma-Yuan . Here's to a much better 2021 ahead.

On my end I just look to make the most of the circumstances and focus on GAF rebuilding, staying active, learning, and music. On a positive track on all fronts there, and haven't lost any family or friends to Covid thankfully.

Good for you, and anyone else who's been spared. It's fucking hideous to watch someone you care about turn themselves inside out because they can't go anywhere near a dying loved one.
 

Peggies

Gold Member
Sorry to hear that OP. Seems to have been a tough year for you. Wish you all the best!

I had one of my worst years too.
My cat had to be put down with 14 years, shortly before my husband told me that he was thinking about leaving me for my best friend whom we've had a threesome with. I don't have a best friend anymore lol. We had the first Islamic terrorist attack in my hometown, which kind of robbed me of my basic trust in humanity. Both my parents were infected with Corona and my dad suffers from severe lung damage because of that. I learnt that I can't have children (at least not naturally) and because of the everlasting lockdowns I'm a borderline alcoholic. Well not so much borderline anymore.

Anyway, let's stay strong and hope for kinder times!
 

Coolwhhip

Neophyte
Nothing too specific in my life, but in general the world gotten more grim this year thanks to the virus. In 2019 life was a lot more effortless, let's hope we go back to that in 2021.
 
Had a great vacation trip to Orlando in february. Returned to my country and to a never ending vacation at home. Been playing games and relaxing ever since.
I can fake my home office work and only actually work hard for 10 days a month.

GoT me a RTX 3090, a big OLED TV, a PS5.

Despite spending a lot I've been able to save money.

If this is the post apocalypse, i'm enjoying it a lot.
 

SlimySnake

Flashless at the Golden Globes
Damn, thats awful OP. My condolences. Hoping your dad pulls through.

lost my grandma. She didnt get covid but doctors wouldnt allow any visitors so couldnt go see her. did get to video chat with her a couple of hours before she suddenly passed away. she was in bad condition but the doctors couldnt find literally anything wrong with her after a full week of testing so I told her she will be fine. pretty depressed about it tbh.

the rest of the year has been fine. the corona check really helped. stuck home with two kids and a wife who now has to teach the kids has been both infuriating and fun. at least i didnt lose my job. bought a bunch of new stuff despite the economy being in tatters so cant really complain. i can pretty much say goodbye to any raises this year which will suck but the new stimulus checks will help. Biden won even though i went to bed thinking he had lost so that was quite frankly the most pleasant surprise of the year. i know there are a lot of trump supporters on this board, and a trump friend of mine was really upset about the election being stolen but i truly think the country will be better under Biden.
 

Aesius

Member
My previously spry and incredibly young acting 88 year old grandmother fell and broke her hip in May. Now she’s in a nursing home, has to use a walker, and her house, which I spent almost every Thanksgiving and Christmas in, is sold and new people live there.

Then my dad died in Sept. I’m still devastated by that but my mom is dealing with it very very poorly. Her grief is really difficult to witness. I try to be there for her but she lost her husband of 42 years, so there's not much that can be done. Now she's thinking of selling my childhood home (where I am right now, actually) because there are too many reminders of my dad there. That will be a brutal day for all of us.

On the bright side, I had my first child in October and my wife got a job that will allow us to move closer to family, which will be a huge benefit for raising our kid (her job also has discounted, super high quality childcare available for employees, which is another massive perk).
 
Sorry 2020 was especially rough on you OP but glad to see it might be turning around slowly.

Pretty bad year but I don't even think it ranks top (bottom?) 5 for me all time. Been out of work but put all this downtime into learning new skills, job will probably be in limbo for the foreseeable future as a musician in Toronto where we love lockdowns. My Bubby died and I didn't get to say goodbye which blew but I was kind of expecting it so it softened the blow a bit. But other than that, I stayed productive and didn't allow myself to stew in negativity since that would have accomplished nothing. Once I can finally get back to work I'll have a bunch of new skills which are only going to help me even more.
 

EverydayBeast

thinks Halo Infinite is a new graphical benchmark
Basically everything went virtual (doctor visits, interviews) it was a really rocky year.
Trash Reaction GIF by Robert E Blackmon
New Year Fireworks GIF by Squirrel Monkey
 

Thaedolus

Gold Member
The worst of 2020 for us has been the daycare shutdowns and remote work situation, which we shouldn’t complain about because neither one of us lost our jobs or anything. But trying to work from home with a toddler is nigh impossible when it’s not nap time and especially when they figure out that when you’re talking on a call, other people can hear them and they can get a reaction by chiming in...thankfully most of the year hasn’t involved too much of that but it’s a huge PITA when it happens. Daycare has to shut down for 72 hours any time there’s a positive case and we’ve had to quarantine for two weeks a few times for exposure and once for us testing positive...

...so we got the rona, which wasn’t fun but not the worst thing. Almost a relief to get it over with and have immunity until we can get the vaccine. Financially we’re probably better off, low fuel costs due to remote work and even though I took a pay cut when it seemed like the economy might completely crash, I got full back pay already. Student loan interest being at 0% has been nice and stimulus just helps that go away even faster.

It’s sucked not seeing friends and going out as much, but I’ve been saving vacation time knowing baby #2 is due in a month anyway so it’s not like we missed out on too much travel. We still managed to go camping with our trailer and visit some national parks. 2020 wasn’t super great in a lot of ways but I still feel grateful for it not being nearly as bad as a lot of people had it. My heart goes out to people who lost jobs or their businesses, I feel extremely lucky for both of us being in “essential” lines of work. Best wishes to everyone in the coming year, I’m sure a lot of things will turn around
 

Tschumi

Member
Jobs and budget both hit 0 multiple times, i hope i can eventually say it built character, but atm all it has built is a fucking videogame collection..

Edit: considering how real your op was i would add that my problems are more than that little sentence, I've contemplated ending it all numerous times, but never to the extent that i would consider a danger sign.. i keep getting heart surgery for an inherited, early onset fibrillation but it's recently started coming back again, apparently because i had the fucking gall to strengthen my heart with regular exercise on my new road bike... and my mother is probably entering her final year due to a disease which I've a 50% chance of inheriting.. my brother has the gene, he's trying for test tube babies, appreciate anyone who could pray for he and his wife to successfully conceive a child free of the gene... It's hugely expensive.. Also i hope they can cure lou gherig's disease by the time my siblings and i hit 60 or so.

I feel that i should say something positive though, i got engaged to the love of my life in April and once covid allows we'll fly to Australia to get married in front of my mum in my hometown of Canberra, hopefully in my favourite building in the world, the national gallery (my wife and i are both architects, she's employed, the rascal)
 
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Aesius

Member
My mom passing was rough, having to take care of her from March until November while simultaneously working from home was rougher. Felt like a nightmare. Still though, I've seen a fair amount of self improvement this year despite the hardship. My new car helps too.

What type of car did you get? I'm in a rental car right now (2020 RAV4) and even though it isn't anything super nice, it just feels great to be in a modern vehicle with modern features. I've been so anti-car payment for years, but thinking about breaking down and finally getting something new.
 

teezzy

Banned
What type of car did you get? I'm in a rental car right now (2020 RAV4) and even though it isn't anything super nice, it just feels great to be in a modern vehicle with modern features. I've been so anti-car payment for years, but thinking about breaking down and finally getting something new.

"New to me" 2016 Volkswagen Tiguan

It's the nicest thing I've ever driven by a large margin. Similar to a RAV4. I intend to baby it.
 
It didnt, i finished renovating our house, working from home was great for time with the kids. No one i personally died from covid, work is great, my homelife is great, reconnected with a daughter i didnt know was mine.

This was actually a pretty good year for me
 

Outlier

Member
It didn't.

I rarely go out and rarely socialize, so it was mostly normal, for me.

With the exception of work. I gotta admit, wearing a mask for 8+ work hours is straining. 4 hours is already a hassle.
 

poodaddy

Member
2020 hasn't been too horrible for me until right at the end. My wife joined the Air Force last year, we've been married for ten years. We have a nine year old daughter. I was in the Army when we married, I was medically discharged in 2011. Without getting into a huge discussion on it, I'll say that our marriage has been strained more this year than it ever has been in the past, and it very nearly ended about a week ago. We figured it out and worked through it, and now we're closer than we ever were, so it all worked out, but it was rough goings for a moment, and the last two weeks have been unbelievably emotional.

I had a catastrophic right shoulder injury about four months ago that completely fucked my training, and very nearly ended bench pressing and overhead pressing for me, and it did in fact end my overhead pressing for now, but I changed up my programming and fiddled with some new accessories and now my training is going better than ever.

The VA knocked me down from 90% to 60, removing a grand of my income every week, due to a fucked up evaluation from a lazy dick Seattle doctor who very obviously doesn't give a fuck about vets and is trying to screw any vet over who doesn't look weak and obese. I'm now fighting the decision and have a lawyer, but I don't know how it's going to go. I can only hope for the best I guess.

Overall, pretty shit year.
 
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TheMan

Member
My dad died which is still tough both emotionally and because it's fallen to me to take care of a lot of unfinished business
Professionally speaking it's actually been ok i guess. I found out I'm getting promoted next July and working from home has mostly worked out ok.
 

Aesius

Member
"New to me" 2016 Volkswagen Tiguan

It's the nicest thing I've ever driven by a large margin. Similar to a RAV4. I intend to baby it.

Nice! Enjoy it. I was looking at a used Tiguan on CL recently. I remember very nearly pulling the trigger on a new car circa 2012 or so, right when the new tech was becoming a lot more standard. But even then, a lot of it felt clunky and slow. And sure enough, vehicles from around that time have aged poorly from an electronics perspective. I'm hoping that improvements in processing power will keep the touchscreens/GUIs fast and responsive for longer on the newer vehicles.
 

Old Retro

Member
I've had much worse years than 2020. Didn't get to see some of my family and friends at all but I know a lot of people are in the same situation. 2021 will be making up for lost time!
 

rykomatsu

Member
2020 was a good year. Being pretty resourceful helped us avoid the impact of lockdowns, even when Texas was "fully" locked down for a short time.

Only thing that really sucked was my god...the volume of work increase even though we didn't have layoffs...and the emotional / psychological stress of gov't overreach.
 

DJR

Member
My mom passed away in April - hit me pretty hard but I'm ok. Just sucks I couldn't say goodbye or be there due to being locked down. Only 6 were allowed to the funeral and no wake, which annoyed me because I enjoy a good buffet. Still, we just crack on and keep going, let's see what 2021 brings!
 

Moogle11

Banned
2020 didn't in the sense that my wife and I were both able to work from home, didn't lose any income (had our best year yet financially) etc. We're both introverts in the full on mostly loathe most people sense, so being able to stay home and have many fewer forced interactions with coworkers and randos has been fantastic. My wife is fully work from home if she stays in this job (company was going remote permanently this summer even before this) and I'll be fully work from home if I want through at least August and doubt I'll every regularly do more than 1 or 2 days a week in the office after this is over.

October on hasn't been great, but unrelated to 2020 events. Elderly dog passed away, which sucked. Then double whammy hit as when we tossed his old bed we saw it was hiding sagging floors and we're looking at probably $15kish in repairs (needs lifted, new support posts put in, rotting floor joists reinforced with new ones etc.). Then over the past month I had increasingly worse stomach/digestive issues which led to discovering a couple hernias. Have surgery on those late next month, and a colonoscopy/endoscopy to see what else is going on as blood and stool tests have been negative.

But that's just life and aging shit, nothing 2020 specific. On a plus note, other than the above, health as been good as we took advantage of not commuting and got back in shape, cleaned up the diet a lot and have lost some weight (not that we needed to lose a ton--I've gone from 168 to 152) and I was able to score a PS5 and XSX and have been having a lot of fun with both. So even with the other BS, I can't complain as we're pretty sell off and lucky overall.
 
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MastAndo

Member
My grandmother died from Covid pretty early on during this whole mess, and only being able to have a half-assed funeral for her was pretty tough on all of us.

Aside from that, I can't really complain, on a personal level. I had been really leaning into remote work for the past couple of years, and in one fell swoop, I suddenly have my dream job - IT work in my pajamas. Work has been great, and I realize that others have had the opposite experience during this, so I am grateful.

The downside of it all is that I had already felt myself becoming a bit of a recluse, being very selective about what and when I choose to do things, and this pandemic just pushed me over the edge. It was like a free pass to be this way. I still see my friends and family pretty frequently, and really enjoy my time with them, but I find that anything that I'm forced to do now that extends beyond this circle or routine has become even more of a drain on me mentally. I'm not sure how to describe it, as day to day, I'm like a pig in shit living this life. I generally feel happy and at ease. The slightest disruption to it now though is met with even more resistance than usual, and I feel myself slipping further and further into this mindset.

Oh, and my weird remote work hours helping overseas offices has completely effed my already effed up sleep schedule. It's always been an issue for me, but it's especially pronounced, now that I can freely pass out for a few hours during the day, if things are slow with work.
 

T8SC

Member
In several ways but there's people in worse positions than me, and that's generally how I look at all problems that fall on my lap.

Also, this helps:

 

Furlong

Banned
I live in the UK and am self-employed but not long enough to qualify for any of the self-employed benefits, so I just went out to work as normal during both lockdowns. It was fantastic walking along the empty streets all by myself with just the occasional fox, squirrel or muntjac deer for company. Pity it can't be like that all the time.
 

DrJohnGalt

Banned
Wife left in 2020 (just a few weeks before everything shut down). That was a bit rough emotionally, but wasn't a blip financially and there was no shouting or fights or bad feelings for each other, just disappointment and doors quietly closing forever.

Also, the country I lived in elected a brain-dead fucktard in 2020.

Other than that it's been great.
 
I spent the last year and a half before 2020 testing to become a CPA. I had pretty much zero social life, and knew that it wasn't healthy, then after I became a CPA and found out in the middle of 2019 that there was no future for me at the company I worked with, because "We don't need another CPA, and we don't want to pay you any more money for what you are doing for us." I began to look for work. At the end of 2019 I got a new job.


Well, I was assigned very little work or training at my new job at a very large organization. I asked for more work, at one point my boss giggled when I pointed out that I had been working on one project for months, and that there was essentially nothing left to do on the project. I figured they knew they hadn't given me enough training to handle the more complicated projects, and that they basically just wanted to have me around to soak up information.


A few weeks before Covid I got a bad review at my job. My supervisor brought up a bunch of stuff that I had never previously heard about, a few things that I don't think are factually true as complaints against me, and basically said "You are being transferred to a new department, and if you try to stay I will most likely fire you." I went from thinking I had this cushy job where little was expected of me to basically "Get out of my office I don't have time for you" in the span of a week. I've gotten little closure on this. One of my new co-workers was on friendly terms with my old boss and asked about this and said that "I didn't socialize enough, and because of that they thought I was weird." I was really focused on trying to learn the ins and outs of my job so.... Excuse me. I'm still not sure I buy that explanation, but whatever. They probably expected a lot of socializing, it seemed like the people I worked with all came from really well off backgrounds, I didn't really want to talk about myself because telling a bunch of well off people about growing up poor in a dysfunctional family, well I think that would have alienated them just as much as me not talking about myself.


So I am transferred to a new department doing a completely different kind of work, but still accounting related. I am there for two weeks, getting training from a guy that I later found out was also new to the department and was probably the least qualified person to give me training, then Covid 19 happens and I start working from home. I'm working from home on a job that I wasn't properly trained to do, and where I have no idea what the expectations are. By now I'm pretty sure I know what I'm doing, but I still wouldn't be surprised if there was something important I wasn't taught.


So that's one half of why it wasn't a great year for me. The other half is that I had a whole series of plans to finally try to get a normal social life going. Stuff like I was going to spend every Friday night at one of the popular bars in my area, just get one or two drinks and try to chat with random people. That's all closed down in my state. I had other plans but pretty much everything related to being social or meeting new people has been cancelled.


I delayed having a social life for a long time, and that was painful for me to do, because I was hyper focused on making sure I would be able to make enough money to support myself. Now I've had a job for more than a year and have barely met my co-workers, and if anything my social life is like half of what it was before this all started. All of the days kind of blend in together now, and the future seems less certain than ever. Until lockdowns start to really end, RIP my social life, RIP the idea of making new friends, RIP my dating life.
 
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bad:
dog died. brother and his gf both got covid (both were fine). parents havent been able to see my 1 and 4 year old daughters (or me and the wife) in 1 year due to covid travel restrictions. the area i live in has been hit pretty hard from covid related shut downs coupled with a lack of support by the government.

good:
got a big promotion, work from home so i see my kids more often, got my race car all fixed up
 
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