Paddle your balls! Explore the vast hypergalaxies in the year 3000 or so to become the ultimate paddle champion of love and paddle skill. Upgrade your stats, learn new abilities, cast devastating spells and put someones underwear on your head while riding a swamp beast! Fulfill your destined purpose of romancing paddles through the ancient art of video table tennis! Plus! the first video table tennis role playing game to have full voice acting by Mark Meer (Commander Shepherd, Mass Effect).
Release Date: March 3, 2020
Platforms: MacOS, Windows
Price: $1.99 USD (34% Launch Week Discount)
- Fight hundreds of exhilarating paddle foes, like “Your Mother’s Subconscious” and “Cthulhu”!
- Level up, upgrade your paddle stats, and unlock new abilities, like “Animal Husbandry” and “Fashion Sense”
- Cast devastating magic spells, like “Psychic Repulsor” and “Hypergalactica”!
- Capture and ride mysterious wild beasts, like the “Goose-Mill” and “Moshi”!
- Discover new equipment, like “Someone’s Underwear” and the “Tori Amos CD Case Shoes”!
- Full voiceover by Mark Meer (Commander Shepard). Listen to him grunt!
- Fire soundtrack by Ghost Cartridge, if you can survive long enough to unlock it!
- Engage in deep, meaningful (but short & sweet) conversations with enemy paddles!
- Turn boss paddles into lovers with the patented Paddle Romance system.
- Paddle those balls!