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I made the attractive grandmother across the street mad at me.

Stouffers

Banned
I live in a relatively small neighborhood: 11 houses, 1 road. Diagonal from our house lives a woman, her four daughters and her grandchild born to one of her teenage daughters.

About a year ago, the husband left the hot grandmother to pursue something younger. She decided to fill the void by obtaining a cat for her youngest daughter.

She hates animals so it immediately became an outdoor cat. No vaccinations. Not fixed. Over the last year, it’s lived off the kindness of us less attractive neighbors. I haven’t fed it, but I provided materials away from the house for it to keep warm during the middle of winter.

The last couple of months, my septic lines have really settled so I had a large portion of my backyard sanded. A lot of sand. The best sand. Very expensive.

Since the sanding, I’ve witnessed the cat shitting in it multiple times. Lately, it’s been increasing. Besides messing up the sand for the grass to grow back, the kids also play in the backyard and I don’t need them having to worry about getting it on them.

I wrote a neighborhood-wide email and asked what I should do about the cat? Yes, it was meant to shame her a bit, but others have already tried to take it to a non-kill shelter and she’s threatened to call the cops on them.

The Hotma emailed directly and said it wasn’t her responsibility because cats are wild animals and you can’t control where a cat shits. “It’s natural.”

I emailed back asking her if it’d be ok to buy an alligator and let it loose in the neighborhood. “It’s ok, because alligators are natural and we can’t control who they drag into the retaining pond.” I then tried to tap into her maternal side by saying “as a grandmother, you should understand my concern for my small children.”

Apparently that was her button. I learned she REALLY doesn’t like being referred to as “grandmother” and wrote a multi-paragraph response on how classless I am for using the term, for emailing the whole neighborhood, etc. It ended with her saying she’ll get rid of it, but her youngest child’s heartbreak will be on me.

I chose to leave it alone. The next day, she wrote an email saying she had changed her mind, the cat is staying and I should sprinkle coffee grounds all over my backyard to ward it off.

TLDR: Hot grandma, cat shit, alligators, Narcism.
 
Here, kitty, kitty, kitty, come here.










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Or fuck the grandma and if she considers that you fucked her good, she might get rid of the cat.
Not a bad solution if you ask me.
 
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Nymphae

Banned
I'd just take it to a shelter whenever it came on my property, make it a pain in the ass for her to not keep it inside.
 

TheMan

Member
Ok, who is everyone's favorite mature/milf porn actress?

I might have to go with Janet Mason. Her stuff with pure mature is just delightfully passionate with lots of kissing thrown in with the penetration, which IMO is a great thing. She really gets into it in a seemingly genuine way.
 

*Nightwing

Member
Call animal control, if she cannot control her animal after several citations and fines they will take said animal away from her and hopefully find a home for it with someone who can take care of it, but most likely will be put down if they never socialized it to people in the first place. You have no control over someone being a terrible pet owner and the consequences to the pet itself for said bad ownership, yet still have to live with the consequences of people being shitty people.
Ok, who is everyone's favorite mature/milf porn actress?
Corey Chase & Anabelle Peaks. No contest, both should be in a separate category by themselves out of fairness to the rest of the milfs
 
Ok, who is everyone's favorite mature/milf porn actress?

I might have to go with Janet Mason. Her stuff with pure mature is just delightfully passionate with lots of kissing thrown in with the penetration, which IMO is a great thing. She really gets into it in a seemingly genuine way.
Easy answer...

Kristen Wiig...

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edit: haha, okay. porn actress. Sorry. Reading comprehension... etc..

edit2: my vote goes to Chanel Preston. :messenger_ok:
 
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TheMan

Member
Corey Chase & Anabelle Peaks. No contest, both should be in a separate category by themselves out of fairness to the rest of the milfs

You know, Corey Chase is beautiful but I just can't get into her scenes for some reason.

Anabelle is gorgeous despite her shitload of tats which for me is usually a turnoff. Is she still active?
 

iconmaster

Banned
I'd just take it to a shelter whenever it came on my property, make it a pain in the ass for her to not keep it inside.

Okay. I didn't want to have to reveal this part of my past to all of you, but I've trapped a few cats in my day.

It's quite simple. Get yourself a cat-size spring-loaded live animal trap like this one. Get some canned sardines and place a bit of that toward the back of the trap. Cover the trap with burlap to make a comfortable hidey hole of it for the cat. For a few days, place the trap near where the cat appears but leave it unset -- just use it to supply the cat with free fish for a while so it gets comfortable using the box as its personal drive-in diner. After you've seen the sardines go missing a few days, set the trap properly. Once you've caught the cat, use the trap as a carrier to tote the cat to your nearest animal shelter.

If the neighbor isn't making her cat wear a collar, that will work best for you. I've never had to try dumping a collared cat at the shelter.

Be prepared to be on bad terms with your neighbor forever.
 
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Dana DeArmond. She's got this trashy spinster vibe I like, she looks like a girl who still works at a record store or something. I like her.
 

Fnord

Member
Call animal control. If/when she picks it up, if she keeps on as normal, call them again. Eventually she'll get tired of going to pick up the cat.
 
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haxan7

Volunteered as Tribute
I was just on the cusp of reading it all but there are 2-3 too many paragraphs for the interest level the initial title/paragraph created
 

BigBooper

Member
You are being silly. Cats bury their crap. Unless they are getting on your vehicles or clawing your furniture a cat isn't able to make more of a mess than a couple squirrels.
 
You are being silly. Cats bury their crap. Unless they are getting on your vehicles or clawing your furniture a cat isn't able to make more of a mess than a couple squirrels.
As someone who has kids that play in a sandbox in the backyard, you’re objectively wrong. I have to sift through that sandbox every time they play outside. I have a cover and everything, but the neighborhood cats find a way to get in there. It‘s not like the cats dig holes and then diligently cover their “plops”. They barely cover it, and then prance away to chase chipmunks into my garage.
 

Blade2.0

Member
Ok, who is everyone's favorite mature/milf porn actress?

I might have to go with Janet Mason. Her stuff with pure mature is just delightfully passionate with lots of kissing thrown in with the penetration, which IMO is a great thing. She really gets into it in a seemingly genuine way.
I'm a Jodi West fan, myself.
 

JSoup

Banned
So, serious response:
I've had neighbors like this. Neglected animal allowed to run wild.
Solution is simple. Get a trap cage, set it out at night, bait it, catch cat, take cat to shelter first thing in the morning.
Alternatively, catch it and call animal control. When they show up to pick up the cat, let her make a big fuss about it. The cat will be taken and she'll get a fine.
 
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