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Cringe I think blew it with this girl...

Relativ9

Member
Nov 18, 2012
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If you've never been in a relationship or gotten laid I'd say go for her, you definitely still have a chance if you can nut up and make a move.

Like others have said there are some red flags but nobody is saying you have to marry this girl and beggars can't be choosers. After the first girl the next ones come much easier, you'll have more confidence, know what you're doing, and other girls will be more into it knowing you've been "tested".

On a side note...I used to know a girl that worked with her mom...you dont happen to work in IT in Dublin do you?
 
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M1chl

Currently Gif and Meme Champion
Dec 25, 2019
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Basically every larger city with a public transportation system around the globe?

In what kind of backwater village do you live that you need a driver's license?
Driving in some large city is annyoing in Europe. Metro gets me everywhere way faster. As I am living in the Prague most of the time I don't practice driving.
 

Stiflers Mom

Banned
Apr 27, 2012
8,474
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Driving in some large city is annyoing in Europe. Metro gets me everywhere way faster. As I am living in the Prague most of the time I don't practice driving.
Same here in Munich. I have my car just for going to the alps and vacation in Italy.

(Prague was really amazing in 1994. Was my first visit there then.. Went to a club called Bunkr and smoked a lot of dope in a cafe with friends. Also Czech food is great. And it was still lookng a bit "soviet" there, which was kind of interesting for a westerner like me.)
 
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M1chl

Currently Gif and Meme Champion
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Same here in Munich. I have my car just for going to the alps and vacation in Italy.

(Prague was really amazing in 1994. Was my first visit there then.. Went to a club called Bunkr and smoked a lot of dope in a cafe with friends. Also Czech food is great. And it was still lookng a bit "soviet" there, which was kind of interesting for a westerner like me.)
Yeah I think you find a lot of those soviet-type of buildings in East Germany too. However from 1994 a lot of that changed. And even then, our biggest attraction is probably old town, so technically only subburbs are new, other parts are still kept in pretty historic state. But not those soviet buildings.

Also not sure how is in the Germany, but in context of this thread, you shouldn't not come pick her up. Here you would be viewed as nosy and too pushy, to just pick her up from her apartment and shit. It's always strange to me, when girls in States allow you to see where she live.
 
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hariseldon

Unconfirmed Member
When I lived in a bigger city I didn't bother having a car - simply didn't need it. I could get shit done on foot because I lived about a 10 minute walk from the centre and my work, the wife worked even closer. Now we're a bit more out in the sticks a car is essential and actually the freedom that comes with it is really very liberating. That and I just love being behind the wheel. For whatever reason I just love cars.
 

borborygmus

Member
Aug 10, 2014
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All right. Game over. She wished me a merry Christmas and called me bestie. Friendzoned. She's looking at other dudes.

She was definitely interested so you still have a shot. You can just ask her out if that's what you want. Do not babble and don't give excuses for why you were passive before. You can just call her up and be like "Hey, you know what? I thought about what you said before and I'm thinking let's go to [whatever activity]."

If she says no then you just respond like "Oh, alright, well you got me thinking about it and I just thought we'd have a good time." At this point despite the "no" she may still be interested because she was 100% interested before, but she'll likely be all tsundere and shit and you'll have to give her a way to save face because women do not like to publicly change their minds. If she's interested you need to give her a way to be like "OK fine if you insist" but actually she'll be excited.

I'm not a mind reader and I don't know any of the people involved in this so maybe I'm way off and she really moved on, but what you said that she had said earlier indicates a serious interest.
 
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Romulus

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Mar 21, 2019
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Its possible that this shit keeps happening to you. It could subconsciously give you confidence that you're wanted. I've seen ot happen. My best friend went almost 11 years with no interest from girls them suddenly after 1 showed interest it periodically happened several times a year. And that's considering hes an extrovert. Just chill and be confident, its obvious there are girls out there that like you, or they wouldn't put themselves out there like that.
 

Mobile Suit Gooch

Grundle: The Awakening
Oct 5, 2013
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She was definitely interested so you still have a shot. You can just ask her out if that's what you want. Do not babble and don't give excuses for why you were passive before. You can just call her up and be like "Hey, you know what? I thought about what you said before and I'm thinking let's go to [whatever activity]."

If she says no then you just respond like "Oh, alright, well you got me thinking about it and I just thought we'd have a good time." At this point despite the "no" she may still be interested because she was 100% interested before, but she'll likely be all tsundere and shit and you'll have to give her a way to save face because women do not like to publicly change their minds. If she's interested you need to give her a way to be like "OK fine if you insist" but actually she'll be excited.

I'm not a mind reader and I don't know any of the people involved in this so maybe I'm way off and she really moved on, but what you said that she had said earlier indicates a serious interest.
Well she did agree to go skating so there's that. But yeah, we'd be hanging out instead of out on a date

Its possible that this shit keeps happening to you. It could subconsciously give you confidence that you're wanted. I've seen ot happen. My best friend went almost 11 years with no interest from girls them suddenly after 1 showed interest it periodically happened several times a year. And that's considering hes an extrovert. Just chill and be confident, its obvious there are girls out there that like you, or they wouldn't put themselves out there like that.
Maybe? I just know next time I'll either go for it or just don't.
 
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borborygmus

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Well she did agree to go skating so there's that. But yeah, we'd be hanging out instead of out on a date

Cool. Decide if you're interested or not. If so, make a connection. There are a million ways to do it, but they all have one thing in common: no babbling. Maybe if you had a good time you can end with some carrot-on-stick action like "btw you're right, I should get my driver's license."
 

Romulus

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Well she did agree to go skating so there's that. But yeah, we'd be hanging out instead of out on a date


Maybe? I just know next time I'll either go for it or just don't.

You honestly probably have a shit radar. No big deal. Girls are really sutled with their hints most of the time, and if they're just putting it out there like they did with you, they want that D bad.
 
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Coolwhhip

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Aug 26, 2019
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All right. Game over. She wished me a merry Christmas and called me bestie. Friendzoned. She's looking at other dudes.


rekt GIF
 
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StylishMGTOW

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Jun 9, 2020
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All right. Game over. She wished me a merry Christmas and called me bestie. Friendzoned. She's looking at other dudes.
At this point, there's probably going to be a lot of mind games between the two of you. At first, you didn't make your intentions known, and now she's playing hard to get, because she's unsure of how you feel. One way or another, you have to make your intentions known to her. There was something there, so pursue it! If she doesn't reciprocate from your advances, it's okay, because at least you have some kind of experience. Move on and don't develop an infatuation for a single woman that's not going to love you no matter how hard you try. That's unhealthy. My suggestion, then, is that if you're really serious about attracting other women, you got to work on your self-improvement, or at least the illusion of it.
 
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belmarduk

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Nov 19, 2019
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Honestly, it sounds like she's interested in you despite the fact that you don't have your shit together. You should go for it.
 
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Coolwhhip

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What happens exactly when you get friend zoned? Can you ever actually get out of it again or is it something biological where the female specimen has officially taken you off the table for reproduction. Never been friend zoned so just wondering #chad.
 
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Stouffers

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Oct 17, 2017
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What happens exactly when you get friend zoned? Can you ever actually get out of it again or is it something biological where the female specimen has officially taken you off the table for reproduction. Never been friend zoned so just wondering #chad.
Everytime you’re friendzoned, your penis shrinks half an inch.
 
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sobaka770

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Jun 25, 2013
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Well she did agree to go skating so there's that. But yeah, we'd be hanging out instead of out on a date


Maybe? I just know next time I'll either go for it or just don't.
Are you OK with being friends then? Are you OK with her dating other people and you moved on?

If not: do not agree to this BS. If you are interesting, funny, have character - you are the catch. So state clearly what you want, make a date and if she doesn't want - then walk away. If she doesn't call - it's her loss, wave her hi at work and move on.

Also if you wanna fuck you gotta put some minimal effort in this: at least get a damn driving license (I assume you're in USA?). Even if you don't have a car, I know several people in their 30ies without even a license and even though you don't need it where I live, it's just such a no-brainer to at least know how to drive in case something happens that it makes my opinion of them drop dramatically. How do you think a woman with a car would react to a man who cannot do a thing most people got over when they were 16-18?
 

nush

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What happens exactly when you get friend zoned? Can you ever actually get out of it again or is it something biological where the female specimen has officially taken you off the table for reproduction. Never been friend zoned so just wondering #chad.

Basically it's what happens when you take too long to make a move but you're a "Nice guy". You've lost the momentum of being "fresh fruit" and will forever be her guy pal. More often than not you'll be forgotten as soon as she's got some new dick but might circle back round when new dick didn't work out.
 
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stn

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You can salvage this, just come off strong moving forward. Ask her out on a date and make it clear it is a date and not a friendly hangout. For all you know, she is just looking for a good time.

If you're inexperienced, that's okay! This is your chance to change that and have fun with it. If you're attracted to her, you would be foolish not to act on this, because its more common for the guy to make the first move than the other way around. Don't throw away an opportunity when it falls into your lap. Good luck!
 
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SLoWMoTIoN

Unconfirmed Member
Basically it's what happens when you take too long to make a move but you're a "Nice guy". You've lost the momentum of being "fresh fruit" and will forever be her guy pal. More often than not you'll be forgotten as soon as she's got some new dick but might circle back round when new dick didn't work out.
He will always be the friend. He never wanted another friend so like I said time to pick up and go before he is just there for emotional support when the new (new to her) dick leaves her.
 
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Deleted member 801069

Unconfirmed Member
Just ask her out for dinner FFS

if outdoor dining isn’t available where you live just do takeout at your pad
 

Kuranghi

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Apr 17, 2015
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I just constantly flirt with everyone I talk to by design so I have no idea when I receive hints either, I'm a massive ho-bag really. Best to just be yourself and don't waffle like others have said here. When I'm feeling down I can't talk to people nearly as well and it feels like I'm different person suddenly, its fucking weird.

I say audio record your not-date with her and post it here, if we hear how you speak around her, then we can give you better advice. If you get caught doing that she will never speak to you again though most likely so maybe stitch it into a pocket.
 

down 2 orth

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Oct 27, 2013
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If she crushed on you before entering the friend zone, the door is still open. Friend zone is only a no-go if a girl never had interest in the first place. Keep paying attention to her - the worst thing you can do is ignore her. If she thinks you're ignoring her she'll eventually get pissed off and find another guy, maybe even as a way of spurring you into action. Keep manning up to initiate with her and she'll give you a free pass no matter how dorky the execution is. The good news is that she knows you're a dork and she's cool with it.

Edit: Most of the people here have no idea what they're talking about. I know I'm just an internet stranger, but I guarantee my advice is legit. And don't worry about "fucking" her as some other guys are saying. That will happen on its own. You just work hard to win her over, whether that means ice skating or going for a picnic or something goofy like that. Just keep giving her time and attention and you'll come out on top.
 
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Komatsu

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Oct 17, 2016
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In what kind of backwater village do you live that you need a driver's license?

You need a car to get around in a practical and timely manner in a lot of big cities in America, man. Have you been to Tampa or Los Angeles?

Though if you're from München, you're spoiled when it comes to public transport.
 
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Ornlu

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Oct 31, 2018
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I vote that you just honestly tell her what you want. It's never failed me once in my life.

If you just want a friend? Be cool with it and go with it.

If you want a serious relationship, not friendship? Be honest with her. Just come out and say it, even if it's hard. She will probably give you an honest reply, whether it's good, bad, or w/e. Even if it's not the answer you want to hear, she might genuinely tell you why she isn't interested in you that way, and you can take that info with you for the next romantic interest you find.

If you want sex, not a relationship or friendship? Shit, say that too! There's probably less of a chance of this working out, based on what you've posted, but what the hell.

Any which way it goes, at least you both know where you stand.
 
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v_iHuGi

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I've been in relationships for years & has Pros & Cons.

Honestly being alone most of the time would be my choice but still love my GF company.
 
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SLoWMoTIoN

Unconfirmed Member
I say audio record your not-date with her and post it here, if we hear how you speak around her, then we can give you better advice. If you get caught doing that she will never speak to you again though most likely so maybe stitch it into a pocket.
 
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