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[Baldwin_the_First]

Aww whyd you do that. If it wasnt weird between you 2, you just made it weird.

Yeah I don't get this either. Was she the one who said you lured her in your place? If not, why would you even apologise? And why would she say you didn't need to apologise because it was so long ago? Was she expecting your apologies before?

edit:

Well the story obviously came from her, she definitely felt wrong about it when it happened, and even if it was long ago, she still deserved some sort of an apology.

Story came from her? What in the fuck. Did she ever tell you why she would have said this in the first place? Because if what you said is what precisely happened, why in hell would she?

Like on a scale of one to ten, how much of a creep do you look like, OP? I'm kidding of course, but if what you said is the total of what happened, I'm not sure why she would have spread these lies. You wern't friends with her at the time? Why exactly are you even apologising for? For considering you a creep? Shouldn't she be the one to apologize for jumping to conclusions and spreading the lie of how you lured her in? Considering you two are now great friends, in your place I would expect some fucking respect from her and for her to actually give you support if you intend to confront these other assholes.

 

[Fudgepuppy]

Yeah I don't get this either. Was she the one who said you lured her in your place? If not, why would you even apologise? And why would she say you didn't need to apologise because it was so long ago? Was she expecting your apologies before?

She must've been whoever said this from the start, and it was a weird situation for her. She knew I liked her and was happy to see her come home from abroad, and then I invite her to my place, saying that a lot of people will come, which doesn't happen.

I knew she had probably gotten over it, but she still deserved some sort of an apology.

 

[Oxn]

She must've been whoever said this from the start, and it was a weird situation for her. She knew I liked her and was happy to see her come home from abroad, and then I invite her to my place, saying that a lot of people will come, which doesn't happen.

I knew she had probably gotten over it, but she still deserved some sort of an apology.

I guess if you look at the situation from her POV it does look like you lured her, but still if you guys are OK now, you shouldnt have brought it up again.

 

[Fudgepuppy]

edit:
Story came from her? What in the fuck. Did she ever tell you why she would have said this in the first place? Because if what you said is what precisely happened, why in hell would she?

Like on a scale of one to ten, how much of a creep do you look like, OP? I'm kidding of course, but if what you said is the total of what happened, I'm not sure why she would have spread these lies. You wern't friends with her at the time? Why exactly are you even apologising for? For considering you a creep? Shouldn't she be the one to apologize for that after knowing more about you seeing how you two are now great friends?

Well it was pretty obvious I liked her, and she just came home from abroad. Worst thing, was that she met a guy that travelled with them, that during the trip became her boyfriend. So when she was trying to "de-escalate" my interest in her (as she and I were pretty damn good friends) and while she had a boyfriend, I had in her eyes, lured her to my apartment under false pretenses. Of-course she felt weird about it, and she probably told someone about it.

I've never addressed this with her as I didn't lure her there and as we became good friends later on. It's everyone else that has been talking about this, behind both our backs.

 

[Baldwin_the_First]

Well the story obviously came from her, she definitely felt wrong about it when it happened, and even if it was long ago, she still deserved some sort of an apology.

I guess if you look at the situation from her POV it does look like you lured her, but still if you guys are OK now, you shouldnt have brought it up again.

Wouldn't the other people that got invited and decided not to come in the end be enough for her not to have that POV in the end anyway? They did end up at the same party with the other ones. Unless OP did say they were coming even though he knew they wern't.. Now that would be a reason for him to be apologising... Other than that, I don't see the reason why he should.

 

[Fudgepuppy]

Wouldn't the other people that got invited and decided not to come in the end be enough for her to not have that POV in the end anyway? They did end up at the same party with the other ones. Unless OP did say they were coming even though he knew they wern't.. Now that would be a reason for him to be apologising... Other than that, I don't see the reason why he should.

Yeah I told her the truth, that most people had miscalculated and were still on clock and couldn't come. I didn't find out about this until I knew she was on the way so there wasn't much I could do to make it less weird for her.

 

[Jeff Albertson]

I think you need to stop apologising to people it's probably making you seem a little creepy and more guilty of the things you didn't do but they are accusing you of.

I'm a desperate needy soul myself so I know the feeling of saying something daft instead kg playing it cool

 

[Oxn]

I think you need to stop apologising to people it's probably making you seem a little creepy and more guilty of the things you didn't do but they are accusing you of.

I'm a desperate needy soul myself so I know the feeling of saying something daft instead kg playing it cool

This too,

Stop apologizing.

 

[Anjelus_]

I read through this thread and honestly OP, I think you're better off. These people you talk to are nothing but drama, drama, drama. Surely you have better things you can do with your time than worry about a bunch of gossipers?

Also, you shouldn't be friends with people who spread rumors about you and say you "lured them" when you did nothing of the sort. Both of the stories, as you related them, are perfectly innocent, and it makes no sense to me why anyone would use them to talk shit about you.

But I do believe it. I've met some real drama queens who gossiped and spread rumors about the dumbest things, things you would never dream anyone would think was a big deal. I haven't talked to those people in nearly a decade. You should do likewise with these ones.

 

[Fudgepuppy]

I think you need to stop apologising to people it's probably making you seem a little creepy and more guilty of the things you didn't do but they are accusing you of.

I'm a desperate needy soul myself so I know the feeling of saying something daft instead kg playing it cool

Yeah, I'm trying.

 

[DJChuy]

You have us OP...

It sucks about what happened to you, but honestly, you're better off without them. They don't sound like great people if they're willing to start rumors behind your back and not allow you to clear up any misunderstandings first.

You should just put this incident & people behind you and move on. You're not going to get better if you keep allowing this to eat you up on the inside. Continue doing what you're doing with the Smash community and branch out a little more. You have a long life ahead of you. Don't waste it on this.

While we're on this topic, I sometimes feel alone at times as well mainly on the weekends. I do have friends at work, but we don't really hang out after work. It kind of depresses me, but I understand they have responsibilities and commitments. Been trying to meet new people and try new things to get my mind off it.

 

[M52B28]

You should just put this incident & people behind you and move on. You're not going to get better if you keep allowing this to eat you up on the inside. Continue doing what you're doing with the Smash community and branch out a little more. You have a long life ahead of you. Don't waste it on this.

Seriously, put this behind you, as he said.

This really sounds like high-school stuff to fret about and the people talking about you sound childish as well.. You really have to have a no-fucks-given attitude with people like them. Stop worrying about them and trying to get your side of the story out because they will most-likely not even bother with listening to you.

Move on and find new, true friends.

 

[jb1234]

If they're not going to give you the benefit of the doubt and are just talking behind your back, they're not worth your time, dude.

 

[Evoker1995]

I have not gone through the whole thread, but I feel you, op.

I am in college now, and commuting to save money. I have joined several clubs, but I have realized I am not very good at relationships. I just do not understand how people get so close. I want some close friends, but I am not sure how to go about it.

This post probably does not make a lot of sense, but life does not make sense to me most of the time. What I am trying to say is that I am here for ya OP, and that you are not the only one who feels lost.

 

[Enter The 36 Chambers]

I still have the same friends I had growing up. We're all finished college and working now or whatever. We don't have as much time to hangout but we still do regularly. Also have two new groups of friends since then. Trying to balance time with them all, work and my girl can be difficult at times.

I really don't know what to tell you OP, making friends just always came naturally to me. You may just be out of practice. Maybe try joining some local clubs or something your interested in. Mutual interests seem good for making friends Idk.

Go to a bar or a club and just try talking to people. It's really not as hard as some people make it out to be. Just start talking to people and see what happens. People aren't gonna wanna hang out with the shy quiet guy in the corner by themselves. Put yourself out there.