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Man requests 'trial by combat' with Japanese swords to settle dispute with Iowa ex-wife

JORMBO

Darkness no more
Mar 5, 2009
7,822
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A Kansas man has asked an Iowa court to grant his motion for trial by combat so he can meet his ex-wife and her attorney "on the field of battle where (he) will rend their souls from their corporal bodies."
David Ostrom, 40, of Paola, Kansas, claims in court documents that his ex-wife, Bridgette Ostrom, 38, of Harlan, has "destroyed (him) legally."

He asked the Iowa District Court in Shelby County to give him 12 weeks "lead time" in order to source or forge katana and wakizashi swords, as first reported by the Carroll Times Herald.

"To this day, trial by combat has never been explicitly banned or restricted as a right in these United States," Ostrom argues in court records, adding that it was used "as recently as 1818 in British Court."
 

Cutty Flam

Member
Dec 3, 2019
59
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Wow that is pretty fucking badass not going to lie

Ex-Wife: You know what, im done, im taking you for everything you're worth in court!
Man: Go ahead. I plan on collecting your soul in a battle, granted legally by the same justice system you have chosen to run to
 

Airola

Member
Jun 25, 2015
3,702
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475
Finland
You took my virginity and now you want to take the house and dog?

May my ancestors forgive me for what i must do

Assuming virginity has been taken yet. Maybe he's angry because instead of taking virginity she tried to take house and dog first.
If that's the case, she fully deserves to be met with those combat moves in the gif!
 

Lady Bernkastel

Formerly 'Scathach Eilean'
Mar 8, 2018
1,058
1,388
570
Wife should bring a Kilij to the fight. Katana is just for people who dont know shit about history.
 
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Azurro

Member
Jun 11, 2018
441
453
295
Fuck yeah. Before ban, the mod who issued your ban has to defeat you in Quake live or Ut99. You win, no ban. You loose, you get banned.
Now that's a unique system.
No, no, no need for bans, we can simply play a children's card game and the loser gets sent to the shadow realm. Ancient Egyptian people loved it!
 

Gargus

Member
Oct 1, 2018
1,172
1,439
495
They should allow this, to the death.

Every state should allow trial by combat if it is mutually agreed on by both parties and are of say 21 years or age or older. And it should be on pay per view and all the proceeds go to the public school system.
 
Oct 26, 2018
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Judge: Don't be an idiot. This isn't the 1800s

Man: But people like to bring up outdated laws back when people used candlesticks at night to write pen quilled letters on shitty paper. It's still the law

Judge (thinking): Hmmmm..... use outdated laws at a time people wiped their ass with corn cobs, or use my judgement as a high salary official and tell the guy he's a moron?

Judge: Ok, but I grant you only 10 weeks to find a katana
 
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