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My Cousin Apparently is Married to Tom Cruise's Sister

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LQX said:
You didn't get invited to the wedding?
:lol Nope. The scientologists in our family hate everyone else. The wedding was 3 months ago and we just found out.


These replies are hilarious. Could use more GIFs though.
 
You'll be a gaf king, if you get a Scientology topic started, and somehow or another you get T Cruise to come post on gaf and try to defend it. Man up, make gaf proud. I wouldnt have any problem calling my cousin and trying to get it done if it were me :D
 
Whackjob: "Hello sir. Would you like to learn about the exciting world of Scientology?"

Cousin: "Scientology?! Isn't that the thing that Tom Cruise does with his mind? Tom Cruise is so awesome, I want his manbabies. If I join you guys, can I have sex with him?"

Whackjob: "Ummm... no. He's trying to cut back on that sort of thing. But... ummm... here! This girl. She's Tom's sister. [Yes you are. Shut up and play along.] If you join us, and reach at least operating thetan level five, then she might be willing to marry you."

Cousin: "Do you accept power of attorney?!"
 
ruby_onix said:
Whackjob: "Hello sir. Would you like to learn about the exciting world of Scientology?"

Cousin: "Scientology?! Isn't that the thing that Tom Cruise does with his mind? Tom Cruise is so awesome, I want his manbabies. If I join you guys, can I have sex with him?"

Whackjob: "Ummm... no. He's trying to cut back on that sort of thing. But... ummm... here! This girl. She's Tom's sister. [Yes you are. Shut up and play along.] If you join us, and reach at least operating thetan level five, then she might be willing to marry you."

Cousin: "Do you accept power of attorney?!"
I'm pretty sure this is actually what happened with Wackjob being his sister, who's one of the highest ranking PR people in scientology. I got into a debate with her at a Christmas Party one time. She won't speak to me ever again. :lol
 
Aselith said:
He's just standing there. He doesn't even have sunglasses. Top Cat sucks a barrel full of monkeydicks.

You should get banned for this..Nobody is as awesome as Topcat, besides Snoopy maybe.
 
Micromegas said:
Isn't Tom Cruise's sister like his manager/confidant? I somehow doubt your cousin is married into that dynasty.
I did a slight bit of detective work (read: looked at IMDB); he has two sisters other than that one.
 
Micromegas said:
Isn't Tom Cruise's sister like his manager/confidant? I somehow doubt your cousin is married into that dynasty.
He's a Scientology so he meets the prerequisites. Cruise got a new publicist about 4 years ago.

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I think that's her.

JoshuaJSlone said:
I did a slight bit of detective work (read: looked at IMDB); he has two sisters other than that one.
Or not.
 
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