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Off-site Community Discussion (Reset, etc.) -- READ OP. Stay civil. Don't make it personal. Keep it in here.

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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
Holy fuck, what a bubble-wrapped world we live in where someone finding you attractive is a heinous offense.
Its not the fact that he found her attractive and you know that. Its the fact that he was staring at her in a workplace environment and tried to get fellow coworkers to join with him in his staring and was so obvious about it that the female coworker noticed what was was going on and felt uncomfortable. Thats the issue.


Finding a coworker attractive is not a problem even at work as long as you keep to yourself and are discreet about it. But treating that coworker like an object to be stared at and then visibly trying to get others to join you in the act IS a problem. And pretty much 99% of HR departments would agree with that notion. Hence why the guy was called into HR and warned.
 
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JimmyRustler

Gold Member
Doesn't really matter what YOU call it thankfully. Because pretty much any HR department here in the states (including that one) and I assume alot of other places considers that harassment. And rightfully so.
And here we go in circles again. I'm sick of this. Read above. I just explained and illustrated above that many women do not take offense of such gestures...
 

Saruhashi

Banned
How is this adult? How is this a place conversation can flourish?
How do people act like this? Accept it?
And guess which poster got banned?
I have zero idea how sane adults can partake in that place!

I don't know. It's kind of fascinating though.

This argument, the subsequent non-ban worthy "fuck you" and the eventual ban for the other guy was all in service of pushing "Joe Rogan is a terrible person".

Why is Joe Rogan so bad? He talks to people we don't like.

The latest post states that Jordan Peterson is a "gateway to the alt-right" but also criticizes Rogan for talking to more right wing people than left.
The way people act you'd think that to be right wing is illegal or something.
There's no distinction made between being right, far right, alt right etc.

Some of the comments on the thread:

"Fuck Joe Rogan and fuck anyone who defends him"
"all of the goddamn Nazis that make up his regular programming"
"Let me know if he's ever being interviewed by someone who isn't an alt-right enabler"
"And also have white nationalists like Gavin Mcinnes and Sargon of Akkad on his show"
"He's the biggest pipeline to the alt-right outside of Youtube's algorithm"
"entertains their shitty alt-right point of view"
"he's creating a platform for the individuals of the alt-right/white nationalists to come on his podcast and spread misinformation and bigotry unchecked "
"No clue about Shapiro, but the other dude is an incels poster boy" (other dude is Jordan Peterson)
"you don't see any of their Neo-Nazi shit?"
"ben shapiro doesn't even have his own perspective. he's paid to have them, financed by actual evil people"
"Fuck joe rogan racist ass"

Yet pretty much the only guy who challenges them on this utter stupidity is banned for "defending bigotry across a series of posts".

I think the guy is right though. Ben Shapiro, Jordan Peterson and Sargon of Akkad are not alt-right, neo-nazis.
But it has been decided that they are and if you even suggest that they are not? Defending bigorty, banned.
I'm not a fan of Gavin McInnes and I don't know very much about him so who knows.

It shows really what's wrong with the site. Certain unchallenged "facts" are established. JP is a gateway to the alt-right. JR gives JP a platform and therefore enables the alt right. If your disagreement with this is too strong or too well articulated then you will be hit with a ban.

The question I would ask is... what is the point of it all?

Jordan Peterson and Sargon of Akkad, at least, are very much against the alt-right and there is plenty of evidence of this. Not just in their statements outright saying they don't like the alt-right but also in the fact that their personal philosophies do not align with the alt-right at all.

Who does it serve when you are taking people who oppose the alt-right and accusing them of being alt-right? Surely the only winner there is the actual alt-right since you are removing some of their most vocal, and most reasonable, opposition from the equation?

So all we are left with as "opposition" to the right, alt right, whatever, is a crowd of incoherent screeching morons that are about as likely to turn on their allies as they are to do anything about the actual far right?

I don't get what their endgame would be here?
 

Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
And here we go in circles again. I'm sick of this. Read above. I just explained and illustrated above that many women do not take offense of such gestures...

And you don't seem to understand that it doesn't matter what "many women" think of such gestures. This woman didn't like it and reported it to HR. She had every right to do so and HR clearly agreed that what he was doing was inappropriate. The fact that some women might not mind getting treated like that at work does not give the guy free reign to do it to women at his job.


She did nothing wrong by going HR.
 
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Papa

Banned
Its not the fact that he found her attractive and you know that. Its the fact that he was staring at her in a workplace environment and tried to get fellow coworkers to join with him in his staring and was so obvious about it that the female coworker noticed what was was going on and felt uncomfortable. Thats the issue.


Finding a coworker attractive is not a problem even at work as long as you keep to yourself and are discreet about it. But treating that coworker like an object to be stared at and then visibly trying to get others to join you in the act IS a problem. And pretty much 99% of HR departments would agree with that notion. Hence why the guy was called into HR and warned.

The fuck? I thought you were ignoring me.
 

Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
The fuck? I thought you were ignoring me.

Yeah I usually ignore your posts for historically obvious reasons, but I haven't noticed anything too egregious lately from you so I thought I'd chime in this time around. Everybody deserves a second chance at some point.
 
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greyshark

Member
Honestly? It's been a really, really dark couple years and it's only going to get worse now before it gets better.
Like, I guess because we had an online disagreement in a place that touts itself for "acceptance" and "community" I don't deserve the benefits of some of my social circles or support groups.

I just want them to realize that. I want them to know that they can hurt people, really hurt them, and maybe even thoughtlessly contribute to almost...ending them - not trying to be too melodramatic - just because they didn't totally sort of instantly take their side and agree with them that one time in an internet discussion.

I’m sorry to hear you’re going through a tough time, I hope things get better for you. Who knows, maybe GAF can play a role in that :).

As far as RE, I believe your crusade will fall on deaf ears, and it will end up causing you more pain. Keep working at staying in touch with your friends (isn’t Discord more efficient for setting up gaming sessions than a forum?), but forget about RE itself and you’ll be better off for it.
 

DeepEnigma

Gold Member
Nobody_Important Nobody_Important playing the victim card again.

> Tells user that they normally ingore their posts

> Whines about maturity when user tells them to check their ego essentially

You spin me right round baby right round...
 

Ribi

Member
You guys should use my fool proof copy paste how to win an Internet argument

So now you're trying to bully me? It's obvious to everyone here you're projecting and salty. I won't this a won ago hold you L kid and I'll take my easy win. You're just a troll so I'm going to ignore you now and keep winning while you keep projecting and being salty, kid
 
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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
Nobody_Important Nobody_Important playing the victim card again.

> Tells user that they normally ingore their posts

> Whines about maturity when user tells them to check their ego essentially

You spin me right round baby right round...

The guy has an established history of outright attacking me and insulting me on a consistent basis.


And not the "oh you are being sensitive" bullshit. He actually got warnings from mods for insulting me directly in the past. And he has done it so much and so often in the past that other members of the site have noticed it and commented on it in past threads. So pardon me if I distanced myself from him as a result in order to avoid a bit of drama. And then I just intentionally went out of my way to try and debate him again after I noticed that his attacks had ceased and the very first thing he does is insult me again.


Sorry if I find that a bit childish.
 
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Shmunter

Member
There should be a new rule. If you get uncomfortable “feelings”, you first need confront the person making you uncomfortable. They gain respect for the person and can move on.

That guy will never harras this girl again, he will also never like this girl. Great working environment.
 

Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
There should be a new rule. If you get uncomfortable “feelings”, you first need confront the person making you uncomfortable. They gain respect for the person and can move on.

That guy will never harras this girl again, he will also never like this girl. Great working environment.

Yeah that sounds great in theory, but I sincerely doubt that most people who get sexually harassed are gonna be lining up to get a face to face with their harasser. Also if the person who is doing the harassing needs to be confronted in order to stop their behavior then they already have a severe problem.


So HR/Management would still have to get involved. This whole sheltering and protecting the harasser attitude that I have seen in here is pretty disgusting though I have to say. I'm glad most companies do not agree with you all.
 
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Shmunter

Member
Yeah that sounds great in theory, but I sincerely doubt that most people who get sexually harassed are gonna be lining up to get a face to face with their harasser. Also if the person who is doing the harassing needs to be confronted in order to stop their behavior then they already have a severe problem.


So HR/Management would still have to get involved. This whole sheltering and protecting the harasser attitude that I have seen in here is pretty disgusting though I have to say. I'm glad most companies do not agree with you all.

Are we talking about the same case here or are our definitions of “severe” light years apart?

There’s a whole reason we teach our kids not to be tattle tales. No one will ever like them!
 
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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
Are we talking about the same case here or are our definitions of “severe” light years apart?

There’s a whole reason we teach our kids not to be tattle tales. No one will ever like them!

Um I would consider sexually harassing people in the workplace a "severe problem" myself.



Not sure about you.
 

Melon

Banned
While I know a lot of times sexual harassment is on a case-by-case basis, that seems....a little excessive to be calling it harassment. Maybe I'm biased due to the fact at my old job (CNA at a nursing home) getting groped was a daily thing and I had to be numb to that stuff. But trying to get someone fired for staring at you seems silly to me. I've admittedly dealt with a lot of creepy men in my life to the point I do have trust issues with some, but come on, getting stared at?
 

Shmunter

Member
Um I would consider sexually harassing people in the workplace a "severe problem" myself.

Not sure about you.

Yours is an example of the non existent neuance as often displayed by hard lefties. Why is seeing beyond anything as a binary or black or white so difficult. Has the digital aged somehow re-wired brains to work like computers?

That can’t be it, because gender is totally non binary right?

Make me understand...
 
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DeepEnigma

Gold Member
Yours is an example of the non existent neuance as often displayed by hard lefties. Why is seeing beyond anything as a binary or black or white so difficult. Has the digital aged somehow re-wired brains to work like computers?

That can’t be it, because gender is totally non binary right?

Make me understand...

Gender is on a spectrum, political ideologies are not, and therefore must be partisan, to only one side. :pie_invert:

Oh, I know!
 
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Athena~

Banned
Well thankfully the HR department of that company disgarees with you.

If HR agrees with you and consider that sexual harassment, how come the guy isn’t fired yet? Keep in mind sexual harassment is a serious offense and it’s one and done you are fired kind of offense.

All we know he has to talk to the HR and he still has the job. So......
 

Papa

Banned
And so ends that attempt at maturity I guess. You had a good run and nobody can say I didn't try.

You know your constant attempts at taking the high road despite having the moral integrity of a communist dictator is why I criticise you, right? Zero self-awareness and an overly inflated sense of self-importance.
 

Yoshi

Headmaster of Console Warrior Jugendstrafanstalt
This is hardly sexual harassment and more an overreaction by an overly sensitive kid.
It is sexual harrassment, because it is reducing her to her appearance and sexual appeal openly and it was unwelcomed by her. I'd say it is a very mild form of it and one that should not necessitate getting authorities involved, but if Nobody_Important Nobody_Important 's report is correct that the person has done similar things in the past at the work place, I would agree he has a serious problem with restraining himself. Nevertheless, if I was HR, I would just ask the pereson to be more respectful and be done with it, the precise form this harassment took is so mild that I wouldn't feel any formal steps would be in place.
 

Dr. Claus

Vincit qui se vincit
It is sexual harrassment, because it is reducing her to her appearance and sexual appeal openly and it was unwelcomed by her. I'd say it is a very mild form of it and one that should not necessitate getting authorities involved, but if Nobody_Important Nobody_Important 's report is correct that the person has done similar things in the past at the work place, I would agree he has a serious problem with restraining himself. Nevertheless, if I was HR, I would just ask the pereson to be more respectful and be done with it, the precise form this harassment took is so mild that I wouldn't feel any formal steps would be in place.

"Restraining himself" from what? Looking at another person? That is a hilariously dumb mindset. It is "very mild" because only crazy folks actually get their knickers twisted over such a benign action and try to call it harassment in the first place. You do not need someone "restrained" when they look at someone, and the fact that you think this is beyond disturbing.
 
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Athena~

Banned
It is sexual harrassment, because it is reducing her to her appearance and sexual appeal openly and it was unwelcomed by her. I'd say it is a very mild form of it and one that should not necessitate getting authorities involved, but if Nobody_Important Nobody_Important 's report is correct that the person has done similar things in the past at the work place, I would agree he has a serious problem with restraining himself. Nevertheless, if I was HR, I would just ask the pereson to be more respectful and be done with it, the precise form this harassment took is so mild that I wouldn't feel any formal steps would be in place.

Umm Sexual Harassment is illegal, no matter how mild it is. Consider that and you think the guy would still have the job if he now has that on his work record?
 

SoulUnison

Banned
Re: the bolded: they know, and they take pleasure in it. These are not good people.

Fortunately, the environment they have fostered will also be their downfall. It’s only a matter of time before that place implodes again. Unfortunately for you, no one has any way of knowing if it will be 6 months or 6 years.

Have you discussed these problems with your friends? Would they be willing to organise in discord so that you can more easily participate?

Some of them don't want to go out of their way to install yet another messenger/launcher/ecosystem just for the sake of keeping up with one or two friends.
Some of them feel like if I was banned then whatever I did must've been basically the worst thing in history and they don't want to be seen interacting with a pariah.
A lot of them don't even realize any of this is happening because I never traded contact information with them outside of the forum or a couple friend's lists in games that are long dead, and there's no way for me to even get in touch unless I try to play a game of telephone, asking people to relay messages for me to establish contact.

It's just exhausting and I'm too tired to keep being tired.
 

Papa

Banned
Some of them don't want to go out of their way to install yet another messenger/launcher/ecosystem just for the sake of keeping up with one or two friends.
Some of them feel like if I was banned then whatever I did must've been basically the worst thing in history and they don't want to be seen interacting with a pariah.
A lot of them don't even realize any of this is happening because I never traded contact information with them outside of the forum or a couple friend's lists in games that are long dead, and there's no way for me to even get in touch unless I try to play a game of telephone, asking people to relay messages for me to establish contact.

It's just exhausting and I'm too tired to keep being tired.

To be honest, they don’t sound like very good friends and you’re better off cutting your losses and focusing on people in the real world.
 

Yoshi

Headmaster of Console Warrior Jugendstrafanstalt
"Restraining himself" from what? Looking at another person? That is a hilariously dumb mindset. It is "very mild" because only crazy folks actually get their knickers twisted over such a benign action and try to call it harassment in the first place. You do not need someone "restrained" when they look at someone, and the fact that you think this is beyond disturbing.
The point is the pointing.
Umm Sexual Harassment is illegal, no matter how mild it is. Consider that and you think the guy would still have the job if he now has that on his work record?
After a certain threshold it is, this threshold is not passed here.
 

Dr. Claus

Vincit qui se vincit
The point is the pointing.

After a certain threshold it is, this threshold is not passed here.

Oh my god. How could I not see the horrors of a pointed finger? Truly, what horrible treatment she must have undergone when an index finger was pointed at her direction. We need to start a gofundme to help pay for the therapy she will need to deal with this trauma.

Or she can grow a spine and stop being an overly sensitive infant.
 
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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
For what it is worth, i am awaiting a comment from you regarding an earlier posting, as all you said was agree to disagree for specific reasons not related to me. Its this post and this post in particular.

I saw the posts. I just have nothing add to them. Like I said before we are just too far apart in opinion to have a reasonable discussion without it going in circles. You and me look at the same posts and situations and come to completely different conclusions when it comes to Era. We each have our own bias when it comes to the topic. You provided a list of "examples" for your list yes, but as I noted the majority of the "examples" that I saw looked like benign posts to me not really indicative of anything in particular. I pointed that out as well in my posts. So once again you are seeing something there that I just don't see. And then from there we moved onto how some members are "baiting" people into breaking the rules and eating a ban and then I explained why I thought that wasn't true either due to the logic of that being severely flawed.


I could keep going but you get the idea. You said the things you wanted to say and I have already said all the things that I wanted say and if we still can't come to an agreement after that then there really isn't much else I can do. I really dislike circular arguments and I am not one to waste time on here for no reason. Especially on something that really isn't that important in the first place. So I say again that we will just have to agree to disagree.



Era has its problems and its issues. Especially when it comes to moderation and the consistency of that moderation. I have said that multiple times now in this very thread. However I just don't agree with your claim that there is some kind of concerted effort by some members of the forum (The Help as you call them) to get people banned. Nothing you have shown me convinces me of that. Though I am always open to new evidence. I will keep an eye out for any new evidence from you in here.
 
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Oh my god. How could I not see the horrors of a pointed finger? Truly, what horrible treatment she must have undergone when an index finger was pointed at her direction. We need to start a gofundme to help pay for the therapy she will need to deal with this trauma.

Or she can grow a spine and stop being an overly sensitive infant.

The fact you call the woman, who was in her first day at work, an infant tell how much empathy you have. For real. The OP surely is hiding more details, and it wouldn't surprise me if his friend made a loud claim and/or an lascivious look. Especially the latter.
 
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JORMBO

Darkness no more
The thread about the guy maybe loosing his job over checking out a girl is golden.

https://www.resetera.com/threads/a-...n-at-work-which-made-her-uncomfortable.86916/

I only read the thread title and though "Boy, you said that in the wrong neighborhood..."
Wonder how interaction between men and women would be if those loonys had their way. Prolly Tinder only...

It’s probably not a good idea pointing out someone like that at work. She complained and hopefully HR just gives the guy a minor slap on the wrist. It’s not something that warrants a firing, but I could understand them just telling the guy to not do it again.
 

eot

Banned

Dr. Claus

Vincit qui se vincit
The fact you call the woman, who was in her first day at work, an infant tell how much empathy you have. For real. The OP surely is hiding more details, and it wouldn't surprise me if his friend made a loud claim and/or an lascivious look. Especially the latter.

I am empathetic to situations that actually require empathy. I am not going to promote the coddling of these grown "adults" in the work place, nor will I help try to normalize such infantile behavior. Sexual Harassment is a real issue and a real concern. By defending such actions as the one shown in this discussion, you are making light of these serious accusations. This is no different the constant false claims of sexism, transphobia, or racism that we see rampant in today's culture.
 

Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
I am empathetic to situations that actually require empathy. I am not going to promote the coddling of these grown "adults" in the work place, nor will I help try to normalize such infantile behavior. Sexual Harassment is a real issue and a real concern. By defending such actions as the one shown in this discussion, you are making light of these serious accusations. This is no different the constant false claims of sexism, transphobia, or racism that we see rampant in today's culture.

So you have no empathy at all for women who are treated like objects in the workplace? And that men should be able to stare and leer at them and get others to do the same without any repercussion at all?



Is that what you are saying? Because it sounds like that is what you are doing and its just plain gross.
 
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Dr. Claus

Vincit qui se vincit
So you have no empathy at all for women who are treated like objects in the workplace? And that men should be able to stare and leer at them and get others to do the same without any repercussion at all?



Is that what you are saying? Because it sounds like that is what you are doing and its just plain gross.

The only thing that is "gross" is your rather pathetic attempt at ignoring what I stated and push a disingenuous assertion. "Sexual Harassment is a real issue and a real concern. By defending such actions as the one shown in this discussion, you are making light of these serious accusations."

Trying to twist this into claiming that I have "no empathy at all for women treated like objects in the workplace" is just weak, even from you, N_I. Grow up.
 
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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
The only thing that is "gross" is your rather pathetic attempt at ignoring what I stated and push a disingenuous assertion. "Sexual Harassment is a real issue and a real concern. By defending such actions as the one shown in this discussion, you are making light of these serious accusations."

Trying to twist this into claiming that I have "no empathy at all for women treated like objects in the workplace" is just weak, even from you, N_I. Grow up.

Yes and what that woman experienced IS sexual harassment. What else would you call a male employee objectifying a female employee and visibly trying to get another male employee to do the same?


If that is not sexual harassment then what would you call it?
 
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Dr. Claus

Vincit qui se vincit
Yes and what that woman experienced IS sexual harassment. What else would you call a male employee staring at a female employee and visibly tryiing to get another male employee to stare at her with him?


If that is not sexual harassment then what would you call it?

The delusions of an overly sensitive child, as I have stated many times prior.

Actual sexual harassment is denoted as unwelcome sexually determined behavior as physical contact and continued advances, sexually colored remarks, showing pornography and sexual demands, whether by words or actions. Looking and pointing is not sexual harassment.
 
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Nobody_Important

“Aww, it’s so...average,” she said to him in a cold brick of passion
The delusions of an overly sensitive child, as I have stated many times prior.

Actual sexual harassment is denoted as unwelcome sexually determined behavior as physical contact and continued advances, sexually colored remarks, showing pornography and sexual demands, whether by words or actions. Looking and pointing is not sexual harassment.

I am so glad that this is one of those times where you are just plain wrong rather than it being some kind of opinion thing.
 
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