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Official Kingdom Hearts: Birth by Sleep (PSP) Import thread of Convoluted Nonsense

Bebpo

Banned
Jun 7, 2004
30,394
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0
40
Orange County, CA
This is a game. A game about this guy:


Who looks like this guy:


Who used to eat icecream with these guys:


Who tried to kill this guy:


Who was actually this guy:


But he's not this guy:


Who hangs with a crew that looked like these guys:


Until they realized Batman was two years ago, and now him and his buddies look like these guys:


And there's some Disney or something in it too:


But mostly everyone will either look sad like this:


Or ridiculous like this:


And by the end of KH25 there will be eight million characters that all look like this:


and the story still won't make a lick of sense
...unless you read the 500 page plot analysis at gamefaqs
......and rewatch all the cutscenes
............and replay the games
.................and then you realize it's still nonsense and you're an old man/woman now whose wasted their life searching for the meaning of kingdom hearts.

which is a giant
heart
moon
door
...in the sky

that grants wishes
or blows up the world
or something
I dunno

But the game is coming out in Japan this weekend (saturday Jan 9th). Games never come out on a weekend in Japan. Why is this coming out on a weekend. It makes no sense. Just like the game. And it's coming out in the US and Europe...someday. No one seems to be in a rush to bring it out in the English speaking countries. Probably because the translators are struggling to translate the plot in a way that it makes sense, but no matter what they do it never does. So at some point they will just give up and type random phrases in and that is when the game will come out.

This is all because this guy:


& this guy:


had a story to tell

Just like when they wanted to tell this story:


And we see how well that went

KH BBS THREAD BEGIN!
 

HUELEN10

Member
Feb 29, 2008
26,480
3,008
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Bebpo, you need a tag for this. Absolutely superb job at whatever it is you just did. :lol
 

Kintaro

Worships the porcelain goddess
Jun 10, 2004
27,926
0
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I watched the 7 minute trailer on GameTrailers and I had no fucking clue what I watched. Other than it looked great. Which is the same exact reaction I had when I played the first KH.

In short, who the fuck are these people? Why are there, like, four different Sora dudes...forget it. It looks great and I hope it'll be fun to play.

Seriously, what the fuck is going on in the story of these games?
 

JayDubya

Banned
May 2, 2006
19,833
3
0
Great OP that encapsulates why I am glad I never played any of the KH sequels and will continue that trend going forward.





<=== And clearly, I like convoluted Japanesy things. But no... just no.
 

Harpuia

Member
May 13, 2009
1,937
0
0
Synthesizer Patel said:
The OP was very informative, could you please use more screenshots to explain who Ansem is, that would be helpful thank you

There's like three Ansems if I recall. Which one are you talking about? :lol

Also, the OP is awesome. :lol
 
Dec 6, 2008
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I am going to be shamefully spoiling myself on whatever shit plot this game wretches out months ahead of whenever the english release rolls around simply so I can get my disgust and disbelieveing "what the fuck is this shit"s out of my system so I can just enjoy the gameplay :lol

What happens to Terra is kinda obvious but man, this Ven/Sora/Roxas shit is going to make me suffer a mini-stroke :lol
 

Kintaro

Worships the porcelain goddess
Jun 10, 2004
27,926
0
0
I predict a big WTF trailer at the end of this game that leads into KH3 Final Mega Mix. It'll have keyblades that shoot lightning covered keyblade shurikens wielded by a hooded Sora, Sora Jr. and Sora-Zero battling Shadow Mickey-Nobody. :D

We will probably drool.
 

jergrah

Member
Apr 15, 2008
2,277
0
0
Seattle
Haha - great post!! My son (12) has played all of the KH games and loves them but whenever I watch Im always confused :) He used his holiday cash and gift cards to buy a PSP just so he can play this when it comes out.
 

Harpuia

Member
May 13, 2009
1,937
0
0
Kintaro said:
I predict a big WTF trailer at the end of this game that leads into KH3 Final Mega Mix. It'll have keyblades that shoot lightning covered keyblade shurikens wielded by a hooded Sora, Sora Jr. and Sora-Zero battling Shadow Mickey-Nobody. :D

:lol...why do I get the feeling that they just might do that?
 
May 2, 2008
23,865
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I love convoluted shit like this, it's a freaking video game i want the ridiculous story and characters :D
fuck the haters!
 

Gilgamesh

Member
Jan 13, 2007
4,655
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0
It only grants wishes for people who are real people, not people who are not actually people, or people who might have been people at some point but are just the left over bits of people that are left over from the other left over bits of people that were people who thought they were someone else.
 

xero273

Member
Nov 27, 2007
3,669
0
0
HUELEN10 said:
Bebpo, you need a tag for this. Absolutely superb job at whatever it is you just did. :lol

Bebpo already has one and he is living up to it. This is his comeback.

I'll probably have this by Friday. Ncsx said they will ship Thursday so if the snow storm doesn't mess things up, I'll be playing Friday.
 

Mejilan

Running off of Custom Firmware
Jun 9, 2004
38,484
0
0
43
NJ, USA
I don't know what the hell I just read, but it blew my mind. Or blew... something. :lol
 

Harpuia

Member
May 13, 2009
1,937
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0
BlazingDarkness said:
I love convoluted shit like this, it's a freaking video game i want the ridiculous story and characters :D
fuck the haters!

I actually do love the convoluted story that these games have.
 

Tailzo

Member
Feb 6, 2007
4,907
17
1,330
Norway
I smiled there :) This was certainly an original import thread. I've nevr played a kingdom hearts game so there is no chance I'll import. I am curious wether the game is good or not though.
BlazingDarkness said:
i don't recognise you any more! :lol
You're not alone. Maybe he should change back his avatar?
 

HylianScribe

Member
Aug 13, 2006
3,733
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Texas


Is the guy on the right going to become Ansem or something? At least the new trailer made it look like it has 100% more Disney in it than KH: 358/2 Days.
 

Peff

Member
Dec 10, 2008
7,040
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Crewnh said:
Awesome OP. :lol

I don't think it's that convoluted, but that's just me being a fanboy

Word. Everything is there on the cutscenes, but hey :lol I'm still not sure whether to import or not...
 
okay I'll do it

Ansem is this guy


Who looks like this guy


(And in KHII is this guy)


But is actually the Heartless of this guy


Whose Nobody's this guy


So at this point, he's this guy


REALLY Ansem's this guy


Who's disguised as this guy


hope that clears things up
 

Randam_Hajile

Member
Jul 30, 2004
825
4
1,460
:lol :lol :lol

Awesome OP, Bebpo!

Let's just hope the gameplay is as awesome as the graphics. Days was my biggest disappointment of 2009.
 

xero273

Member
Nov 27, 2007
3,669
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Magypsy23 said:
Official threads should at least have the name of the game in the title. :lol

It's kind of in there. The abbreviated title is in there. KH:BBS
 

VaLiancY

Member
Oct 7, 2007
4,421
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Fuck my head hurts after those two post. I played the first KH and fell of after that but I'm hesitant to go back in.:lol