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Online dating

Bootzilla

Banned
This year I'll be 10 years married from a girl I met in an online chat. There's nothing wrong with Online dating and I would actively prefer it to ever trying to court a drunk woman in a bar.

How you make it work:
1. Be yourself
2. Be yourself
3. Be yourself

If Online dating isn't working any better than offline dating, it's a YOU issue.
It's different than it was 10 years ago, though. Not that I don't mostly agree with your last sentence, but over time I have noticed the design of dating apps has evolved to keep people engaged with the platform, rather than to find love and move on. People get really addicted to the high of meeting new people and chasing perfection.

I got out of a relationship and started dating again like 6 months ago, and it's a different set of challenges than I've dealt with before.

On the one hand, the bar is just super low. Talk to someone for 20 minutes and they want to go out. Just don't be a douche, pick up the check with a smile and you'll have a second date.

But the inevitable consequence of this is that you end up dating as many people as you possibly have time for, and they're doing the same, and it's tough to really form that bond and make that pivot to a real relationship.

And so inevitably, you look for any imperfection as a sign to move on, and eventually you'll get it. It's a treadmill.

I was juggling way too much and it blew up on me. Now I'm starting over and trying to take it slower. I met two girls last week, hit it off with both. I think I should just focus on them and see how it goes.
 

Bootzilla

Banned
Online dating is a type of cancer. Especially if you're a man because it reinforces the worst insecurities and beliefs you have about yourself.
I feel completely the opposite. Online dating effectively shifts the rejection aspect out of view so you're more focused on the affirmative. I'm sure hundreds of girls have swiped left on me and thought I was too ugly, but I have no particular investment in any of them and it never registers.

What I think about are the ones that show up for a date. At which point they already want to like you, and you just have to affirm the reasons they're there to begin with.

If you think about it from a womans perspective they have access to a parade of 6ft tall or higher guys who are in fantastic shape and have strong wallets. Why should they settle for an average guy when they seemingly keep offered numerous specimens of raw masculinity? They're spoiled for choice so if you want to stand out you've got to portray a version of yourself that's larger than life.
It's not like that, though. I have known a lot of women who have done the online dating thing, and while it's true that they're flooded with likes, and seemingly have a lot of Women have a lot of choices, it's true, and that can make it hard to get their attention initially. But there is SO MUCH garbage on their end that it actually makes it harder for them to find what they want. So many fuckboys and pencil dicked premature ejaculators and redpilled douchebags, and lonely broken boys, and creepers who just want to get pussy pics...

So once you get through the noise and get a girl's attention, it's not too hard to stand out. Just be nice, be interested, be GGG, be fun and you're going to look like a prince next to a lot of the losers she's gone out with.

My last break up left me with terrible self esteem, but online dating has really helped tremendously to get my confidence up.
 
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