It all started when I was 22 years old. I went out to the bars in the vain attempt to pick up, got shit-faced, and cabbed it home. Went to bed in my bed, drunk, alone, but otherwise content.
I wake up in the spare bedroom, and I'm wearing a shirt from work that I had lost 3 years ago and had never seen since. Weird. But I chalk it as booze,and an odd experience and move on with my life.
Until I wake up on the dresser. On my back, head and legs hanging over the edge. My back is killing me. After the absolute disorientation passes, I get up and think, "What in the hell?". This time I chalk it up as sleepwalking, and move on with my life.
And then there's the time I woke up in a strange girls bed at a party I was at. I barely knew her, but apparently I came in in my underwear (thank GOD!), went to the foot of the bed, curled up like a cat and went back to sleep. She laughed it off, but I felt like a total creep, and as one could imagine, the next day was supremely akward.
But of course, nothing can top New Years Eve two years ago. I throw the parties in my group of friends due to access to a seasonal resort with lots of beds to sleep in.
My g/f and I go to bed to "celebrate ".
I fall asleep.
Then I wake up in the morning, hearing muted giggling and conversation outside my room.
I listen closer and hear my girlfriend say, "He was naked?!"
At this point, I'm laying there with that sinking feeling. But, I can't stay in bed forever, and go out to face my public.
So it turns out I had burst into one room with two couples sleeping in it, naked as the day I was born and asked them all if they heard "that noise?".
Then I turned and proceeded to remove all the coathangers from the closet so that "none of the guests hurt themselves" and put them on the floor. I can only hope that when I bent down to do this, I was facing them all, though evidence seems to point to the contrary.
Surprisingly, last years New Years party was just as popular, though "Baby New Year" failed to make an appearance.
I wake up in the spare bedroom, and I'm wearing a shirt from work that I had lost 3 years ago and had never seen since. Weird. But I chalk it as booze,and an odd experience and move on with my life.
Until I wake up on the dresser. On my back, head and legs hanging over the edge. My back is killing me. After the absolute disorientation passes, I get up and think, "What in the hell?". This time I chalk it up as sleepwalking, and move on with my life.
And then there's the time I woke up in a strange girls bed at a party I was at. I barely knew her, but apparently I came in in my underwear (thank GOD!), went to the foot of the bed, curled up like a cat and went back to sleep. She laughed it off, but I felt like a total creep, and as one could imagine, the next day was supremely akward.
But of course, nothing can top New Years Eve two years ago. I throw the parties in my group of friends due to access to a seasonal resort with lots of beds to sleep in.
My g/f and I go to bed to "celebrate ".
I fall asleep.
Then I wake up in the morning, hearing muted giggling and conversation outside my room.
I listen closer and hear my girlfriend say, "He was naked?!"
At this point, I'm laying there with that sinking feeling. But, I can't stay in bed forever, and go out to face my public.
So it turns out I had burst into one room with two couples sleeping in it, naked as the day I was born and asked them all if they heard "that noise?".
Then I turned and proceeded to remove all the coathangers from the closet so that "none of the guests hurt themselves" and put them on the floor. I can only hope that when I bent down to do this, I was facing them all, though evidence seems to point to the contrary.
Surprisingly, last years New Years party was just as popular, though "Baby New Year" failed to make an appearance.
But next time, make sure there's someone there to record it.
