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Steven Seagal Is Now A Citizen Of Russia, Courtesy Of Putin

What's your favorite Steven Seagal fact?


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jfoul

Member
A-Good-Man-02.jpg


''Я буду урвать каждую мать ебать день рождения!''

Future Channing Tatum at 60.
 
i don't get the poll hes become a citizen of russia so you bash him who cares if he is. Oh it because its russia. Its not like US doesn't do bad things.
 

Suikoguy

I whinny my fervor lowly, for his length is not as great as those of the Hylian war stallions
i don't get the poll hes become a citizen of russia so you bash him who cares if he is. Oh it because its russia. Its not like US doesn't do bad things.

Oh good, Whataboutism has joined the thread!
 
This is the best Sub-Reddit.
Steven Seagal conceal carries a holster stuffed with unwrapped Twinkies, ready to draw on any unsuspecting drops in his blood sugar.
Every time Steven Seagal receives an new colour martial arts belt, he first uses it for auto-erotic asphyxiation to 'break it in'.
Steven Seagal once caught himself telling the truth. He lied his way out of it.
Steven Seagal slaps his own ass during sex.
Steven Seagal's Interpol code name is Corn Starch because corn starch is a thickening agent.
Steven Seagal enjoys reading batman comics, but only because he thinks 'Gotham' is pronounced 'Got ham?'
Steven Seagal is convinced someone switched all his mirrors with funhouse mirrors, refusing to believe he actually looks the way he does.
The first takedown move Steven Seagal teaches his students is how to take down the buffet at Golden Corral.
Steven Seagal has also fashioned his asshole hair into a pony tail.
Steven Seagal is so disciplined he can sleep for 72 hours straight.
Despite many attempts, scientists have yet to create a material softer than Steven Seagal's second chin.
Rick Astley gave up on Steven Seagal.
Steven Seagal uses his opponent's momentum to open his Twinkies.
Steven Seagal accidentally got involved in martial arts when someone convinced him a "Dojo" was a type of Japanese cookie.
Steven Seagal runs 5 laps around the neighborhood every morning, a neighborhood in the miniature city he keeps in his basement.
Steven Seagal once won a lifetime's supply of meatballs but ran out within 4 days.
Steven doesn't like what you all are saying about him. When he's done with his roast beef sandwich, he's gonna do something about it.
 

Nester99

Member
The amount of hair dye required to keep that goatee black can not be safe.


In soviet Russia, Goatee dyes you!
 
Anyone know why Richie did Bobby Lupo?

I'm gonna keep coming back until someone remembers seeing Richie.

It's my favourite Seagal movie. Highly rewatchable.

Yep. Shame he never did a third one set on a plane. Just to complete the trifecta.

Pc36xVG.png


I logged onto Facebook and saw this, then my inner voice said "just, let go.."

Looks like he's going to snap Putin's arm there like in his movies.
 

TAJ

Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that.
I had a boss who looked and behaved just like Seagal. He was in the news this year because he accidentally shot himself while showing his gun to someone in a bar.
 

XiaNaphryz

LATIN, MATRIPEDICABUS, DO YOU SPEAK IT
My favorite Steven Seagal fact is that in one of ILM's hallways there's a wall with a bunch of photos showing various Lucasfilm/ILM/Skywalker Sound Oscar winners with their trophies. Seagal is in one of them as he was the presenter for that particular award. So whenever visitors would walk by, they'd take a look and do a double take asking "when did Seagal win an Oscar?!?"

I would have added this to the poll options list if I had seen the thread sooner.
 

G-Fex

Member
My favorite Steven Seagal fact is that in one of ILM's hallways there's a wall with a bunch of photos showing various Lucasfilm/ILM/Skywalker Sound Oscar winners with their trophies. Seagal is in one of them as he was the presenter for that particular award. So whenever visitors would walk by, they'd take a look and do a double take asking "when did Seagal win an Oscar?!?"

I would have added this to the poll options list if I had seen the thread sooner.
He deserves a Oscar for on deadly ground.
 
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