• Hey, guest user. Hope you're enjoying NeoGAF! Have you considered registering for an account? Come join us and add your take to the daily discourse.
  • The Politics forum has been nuked. Please do not bring political discussion to the rest of the site, or you will be removed. Thanks.

"Stop asking me to show you my tits"

Status
Not open for further replies.

Croatoan

They/Them A-10 Warthog
Jun 24, 2014
5,043
3,870
1,030
I've been wanting to post on this subject for some time now as it is something that directly affects someone I love.

Last night my wife was playing a multiplayer game (Blops3 zombies) by herself and had to say those exact words in the title, not just once, but multiple times until she was harassed to the point that she just turned off her PS4 in anger. I asked her why she didn't just leave? She said that she didn't think she should have to, especially when she was close to breaking her wave record in that match.

The night before we were playing the same game together and she was explaining how to get the pack a punch open when some fuckwad told her to "Shut up you stupid bitch" for no other reason than she was a girl playing a game and knew what she was talking about. If that person had been in the room with us, I would be posting this from prison.

Then there are the countless friend requests and messages that are either outright harassment or terrible attempts at pick up lines. How fucking pathetic are you tools?
She routinely gets happy messages like:

"Go back to the kitchen whore."

"I'm gonna cum in your ass."

"Friend me. Unless you are fat and ugly."

"DTF?"

and much much worse.


To all the guys out there that treat her just like you treat me. I thank you.

To the rest, well, I'm sorry my wife is good at shooters and often shows you guys up. I am proud of her for not backing down, for not changing her feminine screen name and for continuing to use voice chat even though you treat her like shit. I hope one day your balls drop and realize what a real man actually is because what you are now is sub-human gutter trash.
 

backflip10019

Member
Feb 19, 2007
20,042
2
1,385
NYC
Yikes, that's disgusting that people act like that. Your wife shouldn't have to put up with that kind of abuse, especially during something that's supposed to be fun.

That said, a good short term solution in BO3 is the mute all functionality. I'd highly recommend it.
 

Karsticles

Member
Oct 25, 2010
44,326
0
0
Florida
www.youtube.com
I really wish game companies were more proactive about giving people measures to report these functions, and that they took a harsh stance against them. It's annoying enough that I feel like the gaming media has a responsibility to make this a PR problem for the big 3 until it is fixed.
 

Mesoian

Member
Mar 23, 2012
27,204
5
0
The People's Republic of Cambridge
It's tough because the PS4 doesn't quite have the reporting system that Microsoft has in place.

A friend of mine used to screen cap those messages and put them on a separate twitter account. These people deserve to be publicly shamed.
 

Creaking

He touched the black heart of a mod
May 17, 2013
16,490
2
0
It's difficult since there's not much you can do besides leave. Might due to make use of the PS4's last-15-minutes recording function though. Maybe report a few users.
 

DNAbro

Member
Nov 18, 2013
15,118
1
0
I rarely hear people speak in lobbies so that's crazy. Also a good reason to immediately hit mute.
 
J

Jotamide

Unconfirmed Member
Almost 10 years of XBL and PSN and both MS and Sony have given half-assed reputation systems to "deal" either this. It's embarrassing.
 

Doctor_Thomas

Member
May 27, 2013
7,371
0
0
I'm still shocked if I'm online and a girl is playing.... and not in a "what? WHY IS A GIRL PLAYING GAMES?" sort of way, in a "I couldn't put up with that shit" sort of way.

If a girl is playing, they're either a teammate or an opponent and I'll treat them how I treat everyone online, but not talking to anyone because I'm afraid of talking in games online because I'm from Belfast and we sound ridiculous.

Anyway, back on point, people are arseholes.
 

Diablohead

Member
Jun 4, 2006
43,511
1
0
I hear smack talk in halo 5 quite often, someone will say hello and another will feel like replying with "fuck you f***** no one is interested" or very similar.

Assholes on the internet, this is why I party chat.
 

EthanC

Banned
Apr 29, 2015
1,390
0
0
Aziz Ansari's show on Netflix dealt with how women and men are treated differently online. He and his girlfriend each posted instragrams of their breakfast. He got responses related to how the food looked. She got, "I wanna fuck your face."
 

Kyne

Member
Aug 19, 2013
5,345
4
550

get the PSN ID's of these people, see if you can track them down via social media. Find a way to get the message out there on what they said, post it on their facebook wall/twitter/whatever.
 

Inuhanyou

Believes Dragon Quest is a franchise managed by Sony
Jul 26, 2014
26,221
2
0
America
I feel bad that women in particular have to go through that specific amount of verbal abuse although bully over game chat(including COD) isn't a new thing at all.

I don't know how policing could be changed though to make it so that you could kick offenders like that
 

Raide

Member
Oct 29, 2007
24,342
1
0
 

JayWood2010

Member
Sep 16, 2014
1,954
0
0
Unfortunately I dont think this is going to change anytime soon. Its pathetic, but it isnt something that will vanish anytime soon.

I'm usually in party chat with friends to avoid behavior like this. Though if im in the mood and when im not in party I tend to orchestrate team work, so if she insists on talking then she will need to just mute people by toggling the mute button and then report them afterwards.
 

popo

Member
Mar 9, 2013
4,082
1
420
They will mostly be kids. That doesn't excuse it but yeah, kids are shitty and the more anonymous it is - the shittier they can be.
 

Ferrio

Banned
Jun 7, 2004
56,365
2
0
And people wonder why the lack of voice chat doesn't bother many of us. Yes I know muting is an option, but if all the decent players are muting games because of this crap then all you're left with is the shitheads.
 

The Ummah

Banned
Jul 9, 2015
1,043
0
0
Anonymity over the internet makes people act like they are invincible. Sorry that she has to go through that.

Do you have mutual friends you can play private zombie matches with?
 

Croatoan

They/Them A-10 Warthog
Jun 24, 2014
5,043
3,870
1,030
Yikes, that's disgusting that people act like that. Your wife shouldn't have to put up with that kind of abuse, especially during something that's supposed to be fun.

That said, a good short term solution in BO3 is the mute all functionality. I'd highly recommend it.

We mute in battlefield and leave games when doing co-op stuff like zombies.

Zombies is very teamwork oriented so muting someone isn't a great option if you want to be successful. Better to leave and find people who don't suck at life. Thankfully there are more of those than the douche nozzles.
 

RumblingRosco

Member
Oct 23, 2007
18,022
0
1,235
This is why Blizzard and Nintendo are taking the correct approach - just limit olnine communication. People are too irresponsible to be trusted with vocal anonymity online.
 

heyf00L

Member
Jan 3, 2011
2,811
0
0
Here's a good thing about server browsers. You can play on a server with strict moderation, and make friends too. Of course it only works on really popular games.
 

jon bones

hot hot hanuman-on-man action
Jan 9, 2007
33,912
1
1,480
i auto mute everyone who isn't a friend in every video game i play

This is why Blizzard and Nintendo are taking the correct approach - just limit olnine communication. People are too irresponsible to be trusted with vocal anonymity online.

always have a great time in Hearthstone or my Wii U games - more companies should limit speech options in public chat
 

valkillmore

Member
May 17, 2006
12,700
0
1,365
There should already be more of a spotlight on disgusting behaviour like this. It needs to go. Those engaging in it need to go. No place for it
 

Mesoian

Member
Mar 23, 2012
27,204
5
0
The People's Republic of Cambridge
Yeah, at least on the X1. You just hit menu (or whatever Back used to be) then X and it mutes everyone in the match.

For a co-op game like CODBLOPS Zombies though, you should be able to go into a game expecting to be able to communicate.

But you can't, because these people are fucking sad.

i auto mute everyone who isn't a friend in every video game i play

it's awful playing with these dummies

Same. It's particularly bad in fighting games because, win or lose, it just results in these yutzs screaming into their microphone.

I have, literally, never had a decent verbal conversation online in a fighting game. Sometimes there are nice comments left afterwards, but most of the time, if you're using your mic in a fighting game, you're an asshole and it should be taken away.
 

Croatoan

They/Them A-10 Warthog
Jun 24, 2014
5,043
3,870
1,030
get the PSN ID's of these people, see if you can track them down via social media. Find a way to get the message out there on what they said, post it on their facebook wall/twitter/whatever.

We report what we can. Is there a shame site for this kind of stuff?
 

Theorry

Member
Dec 4, 2014
15,857
3
0
Think COD itself plays a big part in that also. Alot of terrible and rude kids in that game.
 

Jawmuncher

Member
Sep 2, 2010
61,688
17
790
Isla Nublar
Yeah it's a pity the state some game communities are when some players just want to use voice chat. Sure you can just mute or not chat, but at the same time it's not fixing anything.
 

Chillz0r

Banned
Nov 9, 2014
288
0
0
Sometimes i wish for a world where everyone can be held responsible for 100% of the shit they say, on the internet and otherwise.

Im a guy and *i* am really sick of idiots harassing costantly the people i care about when they should be just having fun.
 

Glendemonium

Member
Mar 14, 2015
1,846
6
345
Arizona
Disgusting, sorry your wife had to deal with that.

I wanted to suggest she try Destiny or something that doesn't require to chat online save for raiding, but why should she have to move to a different game because rude thirsty nerds are giving her trouble?
 

lazygecko

Member
Apr 8, 2014
9,363
20
0
BLOPS3 is matchmaking multiplayer, right? If you don't want to put up with shit like this, then the optimal solution is pretty much to play on community servers with active moderation and enforced server rules. This completely transforms the social climate when you have people who behave because they want to maintain a respectable reputation and be allowed back in. It makes the social experience in these types of games so much more pleasant that I simply refuse to play these types of games if they don't support servers. That goes not just for sexism but any kind of obnoxious behavior.
 

Sanpunkan

Member
Sep 12, 2011
169
0
0
I remember hearing this kind of disgusting trash when I first tried Xbox Live back when the 360 first came out. Set me down a course of actively avoiding multiplayer games that continues to this day, for better or for worse.

In addition to being derogatory towards women, I remember the online community being pretty toxic towards gays as well. Made me very uncomfortable.
 

chrislowe

Member
Mar 19, 2009
1,282
0
645
how did they knew she was a girl? did she have a cam on or something?

Too bad they couldnt behave like normal people.
 

studyguy

Member
Jun 10, 2013
20,605
0
0
I feel you OP.
My girlfriend explained to me long ago why she blocked literally all outside contact when playing online with the exception of friends. When we got the PS4 recently and she transferred her PS3 account to the PS4 there were no filters for a few days. Playing COD online with random people on her account was straight up awful (her screen name makes it painfully obvious she's a woman). Even with me playing on the account, a dudes voice and all still got requests for tits and nudes.
 
Status
Not open for further replies.