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What is Your Favourite Conspiracy Theory?

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dukeoflegs

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Dec 8, 2012
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I watched a documentary about the JFK shooting and how one of the secret service agents accidentally shot him after the first Oswald shot. It was really interesting.

It was called JFK Smoking Gun.
 
Feb 13, 2013
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That gif is amazing.

Ever since I've been a kid I always had the thought that maybe I'm the only one that actually exists and everyone else is just made up by my consciousness. What's really weird is when you've learned a new word you'd never heard before and all of sudden you're hearing it all the time. Though I suppose it's a lot like when you buy a car and suddenly it seems like every second car is the same as yours. Stupid pattern seeking brain.

Also simulation theory.

Yeah I've had similar thoughts as these. It's all an elaborate illusion and what not. Always liked this Bill Hicks bit that touches on that idea a bit:

Today a young man on acid realized that all matter is merely energy condensed to a slow vibration, that we are all one consciousness experiencing itself subjectively, there is no such thing as death, life is only a dream, and we are the imagination of ourselves. Heres Tom with the Weather.
 

DragonSworne

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I always found Linda's Howes reports on cattle mutilation to be fascinating. Anyone figure out what is killing those cows and sucking them dry?
 

way more

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That Jewish bear conspiracy is so stupid I have to counter with Roko's basilisk.

The core claim is that a hypothetical, but inevitable, singular ultimate superintelligence may punish those who fail to help it or help create it.

This is not necessarily a straightforward "serve the AI or you will go to hell" — the AI and the person punished need have no causal interaction, and the punished individual may have died decades or centuries earlier.
Furthermore, the punishment is for those who knew the importance of the task in advance but did not help sufficiently. In this respect, merely knowing about the Basilisk — e.g., reading this article — opens you up to hypothetical punishment from the hypothetical superintelligence.

Note that the AI in this setting is supposedly not a malicious or evil superintelligence (AM, HAL, SHODAN, Ultron, the Master Control Program, SkyNet, GLaDOS) — but the Friendly one we get if everything goes right and humans don't create a bad one. This is because every day the AI doesn't exist, people die that it could have saved; so punishing you or your future simulation is a moral imperative, to make it more likely you will contribute in the present and help it happen as soon as possible.

http://rationalwiki.org/wiki/Roko's_basilisk

Slate.com has it's own write up.

Yeah I've had similar thoughts as these. It's all an elaborate illusion and what not. Always liked this Bill Hicks bit that touches on that idea a bit:

This is called solipsism. Man, Bill Hicks certainly was no Hendrix or Cobain. If he were still alive the amount of material that crappy would overshadow him for sure.
 

Mass Effect

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Apr 24, 2011
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I've always been a fan of the "Lost Cosmonauts" theory. It's extremely creepy and sounds like something the USSR would do.

Ha I remember that one, it was the Dulce base in New Mexico. This shit is gold:



https://roadtrippers.com/us/dulce-n...lien-cave-base?lat=40.80972&lng=-96.67528&z=5

Oh and here's a helpful infographic of the different levels in the base :lol


This is some XCom-like shit.
 

Kenai

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Feb 11, 2012
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I thought it was the moon landing "hoax" but I was wrong.

I am reading about the Berenstain Bears conspiracy thing and am laughing out loud, practically in tears actually so this is hard to type. Definitely my favorite, used to read those books a lot so this a very enjoyable one.
 

block tower

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Oct 14, 2012
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that Jesus and other religious figures were real and who people claimed them to be. I always think of that Ill Bill verse "what Hollywood tries to pass off as fantasy, might already have happened in actuality, and vice versa, if Jesus Christ was a person, who was Mithra? who was Krishna? who was the first to be baptized , crucified, resurrected, betrayed and made into a martyr for someone else's redemption?".
 

Tagyhag

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Aug 21, 2013
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Stuff like the Lost Cosmonauts. Mixture of space and secret Soviet era secrecy is really inviting (regards of how nonsense it is)

Yes, that stuff is morbid and fascinating to read, mostly because while it's pretty much guaranteed to be fake, it's something I could see the Soviet Union doing.
 

Crayon

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Jan 6, 2007
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I love conspiracy theories across the board and i believe many. Where believe means agnosticism.

For the example i now believe this berenstein bears alternate universe story. Sounds as good as any explanation. So sure why not.

The ultimate conspiracy theory is of course reptilian overlords. Because when you drill down into any conspiracy theory, and evetually come to reptilian overlords, you know youve gone too far.
 

doofy102

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Nov 21, 2013
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I wish there were more Pychon-type conspiracies where the conspiracy is that an ancient, secret cult wants to deliver pizza or something.
 

Sobriquet

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Jan 11, 2009
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This topic showed up on reddit a few days ago and the one I liked is that we used to live in a universe where the books/show was called BerenstEin Bears (ask anyone and they'll remember it that way) but we've since shifted into a universe where it's called BerenstAin Bears and always was.

Uh...it's always been Berenstain. Everyone knows that, right? This is a joke? FWIW I was born in '74.
 

A Fish Aficionado

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I don't much believe it, but I like the theory that the Gita described nuclear warfare. Has a nice symmetry with Oppenheimer quoting it when it was (re)discovered.

http://www.ajithkumar.cc/history/nuclear-warfare-in-ancient-india-the-proofs-beyond-doubt/

https://theextinctionprotocol.wordp...-among-indus-valley-civilizations-reexamined/

Robert Oppenheimer was enamored by the Gita. Even has his own version of it.

Read this PDF
The Gita of J. Robert Oppenheimer

Many of his contemporaries thought that Oppenheimer was a fool to mess with literature, poems, and the liberal arts.

It was what made him a humanist.
 
Feb 13, 2013
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This is called solipsism. Man, Bill Hicks certainly was no Hendrix or Cobain. If he were still alive the amount of material that crappy would overshadow him for sure.

Ok? You're comparing Hicks to them why? Can't deny the dude was a damn good standup. Would be interesting to see his act today, but automatically projecting where someone's career or quality of material would be if they'd lived seems silly.
 

Shaneus

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Jul 26, 2004
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And guess what? While one or two of the reports could certainly have been the result of visits from – or surveillance by – people at an official level, the majority of the 15 or so accounts I received were of the classic Men in Black type. That’s to say the pale-faced, scrawny, staring-eyed, Fedora-hat-wearing kind. And almost all of them dated from as late as the last decade or so.
So... they were fedora-wearing computer geeks? (that's from here, had to reverse image search)
 

LookAtMeGo

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Oct 30, 2013
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Apollo 20, ancient structures and tech on the moon, we've been back to the moon a lot but not publicly. Secret mining missions and bases on the moon, underground bases, the hollow moon, ancient structures on mars (Cydonia), area 51, Tunguska event, Atlantis, Mu, Lemuria, Babooshka lady, JFK, Brotherhood of the snake, Bohemian Grove, Fake news casts (propaganda), technologically advanced ancient cultures.
 

way more

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Ok? You're comparing Hicks to them why? Can't deny the dude was a damn good standup. Would be interesting to see his act today, but automatically projecting where someone's career or quality of material would be if they'd lived seems silly.

I'm not projecting, I'm reviewing. His "we are all one-ness in the great chakra of love and the eternal bosom of Equality," quote is is vomit worthy when you consider his conspiracy theories, his lame insults to that heckler, and his pointless insults of bands during the time.

He's a artist who died young so he gets compared to others who did and are revered.
 

Timeless

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Dec 11, 2012
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"studies have shown the carbon molecule in human beings is the same as can be found in humans. In fact experts are still yet to differentiate the difference between corn and human beings."
 
Feb 13, 2013
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I'm not projecting, I'm reviewing. His "we are all one-ness in the great chakra of love and the eternal bosom of Equality," quote is is vomit worthy when you consider his conspiracy theories, his lame insults to that heckler, and his pointless insults of bands during the time.

He's a artist who died young so he gets compared to others who did and are revered.

Eh, I think most of his conspiracy theories were done in satire, don't know if he really bought into them that seriously. Part of the act and what not. And yes, he was not very nice to that lady. To each their own, I thought he had an incredible knack for delivery.
 
A

A More Normal Bird

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I'm not projecting, I'm reviewing. His "we are all one-ness in the great chakra of love and the eternal bosom of Equality," quote is is vomit worthy when you consider his conspiracy theories, his lame insults to that heckler, and his pointless insults of bands during the time.

He's a artist who died young so he gets compared to others who did and are revered.
The quote you're talking about was part of a joke about how the media only reports on extreme behaviour associated with drug use, instead of the far more common and boring occurrences like someone sitting on a couch and coming up with iffy philosophy.
 

way more

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Eh, I think most of his conspiracy theories were done in satire, don't know if he really bought into them that seriously. Part of the act and what not. And yes, he was not very nice to that lady. To each their own, I thought he had an incredible knack for delivery.

The quote you're talking about was part of a joke about how the media only reports on extreme behaviour associated with drug use, instead of the far more common and boring occurrences like someone sitting on a couch and coming up with iffy philosophy.

Ok. Maybe he was less sincere than I thought. I probably take him more literally than other comics because we don't get to see him "off" like if he was on Letterman's or John Stewart's chair. The 80's were kind of about character.
 
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Ok. Maybe he was less sincere than I thought. I probably take him more literally than other comics because we don't get to see him "off" like if he was on Letterman's or John Stewart's chair. The 80's were kind of about character.

Well he certainly hated government, he even did some video correspondence when the Branch Dividian/Waco shit was going down, he even took a small camera crew out just outside the perimeter of Koresh's compound to discuss the situation all guerilla journo style. This was when his cancer was pretty bad iirc. Definitely a good deal of sincerity towards certain aspects of his act.
 

way more

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Now this is interesting. I'd like to see how the LW community freaks out if someone ever makes a movie out of this concept

It's a great concept. You could dress it up in whatever way you want too. The same way Matrix was about kickboxing you could do the movie with MMA or bring John Woo back.
 

MrCunningham

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Jan 12, 2012
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Planet Nibiru (or Planet X). According to conspiracy theorists, it travels around a long orbit of out solar system and will come really close to earth within the next year or so and will be responsible for the next ice age. Going by conspiracists, governments around the globe already know of its existence and have been building underground bunkers (The Denver airport is apparently one of the most well known) to protect a small amount of the earths population.

Of course I don't believe any of this, but I do like this conspiracy.
 

DaiHard

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Jul 2, 2013
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Gang stalking.

Search for this on YouTube and see videos of paranoid people convinced that people going about their daily lives,sometimes while wearing a particular colour, are in fact stalking and harrasing them.

Videos show purported victims of “gang-stalking” physically approaching and filming U.S. Postal Service employees, electrical company technicians, and people simply walking down the street to implore them to stop gang-stalking them. One viral video poster repeatedly shouts that she “has done nothing wrong,” and that the seemingly dumbfounded “gang-stalkers” should “stop following” her.
 
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I always found Linda's Howes reports on cattle mutilation to be fascinating. Anyone figure out what is killing those cows and sucking them dry?
People these days are far less accustomed than they once were to the sight of animals that have died in the field and been picked at by carrion eaters. This is because we just don't need to deal with the same kind of widespread pestilence or numbers of livestock predators that our forbears did thanks to modern farming techniques.

A carrion crow will peck out the eyes, lips, tongue and anus of a carcass, for instance, as these are soft parts easily accessed without the need to tear through an animal's tough hide. An open abcess on a living animal's body might be similarly picked clean posthumously by such a creature.

The other detail that people don't often consider is that the blood of a dead animal will congeal very quickly and drain away from exposed parts, giving the impression of the blood having been drained from the whole body. The outward signs of decay such as putrefaction (smells) or maggots can take days to manifest, especially in colder climates, so a carcass that has seen a bit of exposure might be mistaken by the untrained eye for one that is only recently dead.

I think if you showed many of these cattle mutilation cases to a farmer from a century or two ago, they'd shrug and ask you what the bid deal was.
 

Sane_Man

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Jan 11, 2013
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I'm not projecting, I'm reviewing. His "we are all one-ness in the great chakra of love and the eternal bosom of Equality," quote is is vomit worthy when you consider his conspiracy theories, his lame insults to that heckler, and his pointless insults of bands during the time.

He's a artist who died young so he gets compared to others who did and are revered.

You have no idea what you're talking about. Stop.
 

Macadinho

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Apr 2, 2015
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I always loved the Kennedy Assassination one, as it's probably the only theory with weight since not all of the facts are known and it's pseudoscience. It's a pity we'll never get the full truth
 
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