* The man who invented the red carpet needed his head examined.
o About to disembark on state visit to Brazil, November 1968. (quoted in Andrew Duncan, The Reality of Monarchy)
* You have mosquitoes. I have the Press.
o In a conversation with the matron of a hospital while on a tour of the Caribbean, 1966. (quoted in Andrew Duncan, The Reality of Monarchy)
* It seems to me that it's the best way of wasting money that I know of. I don't think investments on the moon pay a very high dividend.
o On the U.S. Apollo program, press conference in Sao Paulo, Brazil, November 1968. (quoted in Andrew Duncan, The Reality of Monarchy)
* How do you keep the natives off the booze long enough to get them through the test?
o Said to a driving instructor in Scotland, he asked; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* If you stay here much longer, you'll all be slitty-eyed.
o Said in 1986 to a group of British students in China; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* You are a woman, aren't you?
o After accepting a gift from a Kenyan woman; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* If it has four legs and is not a chair, has wings and is not an aeroplane, or swims and is not a submarine, the Cantonese will eat it. (1986)
o "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* British women can't cook. (1966)
o "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* You managed not to get eaten then?
o Said to a British student in Papua New Guinea; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* People usually say that after a fire it is water damage that is the worst. We are still trying to dry out Windsor Castle.
o Said on a visit to Lockerbie in 1993 to a man who lived in a road where eleven people had been killed by wreckage from the Pan Am jumbo jet. "Prince Philip's gaffes". BBC. August 10, 1999.
* Deaf? If you are near there, no wonder you are deaf.
o On a visit to the new National Assembly for Wales in Cardiff, said to a group of deaf children standing next to a Jamaican steel drum band; "Deaf insulted by duke's remark". BBC. May 27, 1999. ; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* Do you still throw spears at each other?
o Said in 2002 to a Indigenous Australian businessman; "Prince Philip's spear 'gaffe'". BBC. March 1, 2002. ; "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* You can't have been here that long you haven't got a pot belly.
o Said to a Briton in Budapest, Hungary (1993); "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* Aren't most of you descended from pirates?
o Said in 1994 to an inhabitant of the Cayman Islands); "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* Everybody was saying we must have more leisure. Now they are complaining they are unemployed. (In 1981, in reference to the economic recession.)
o "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* Ah good, there's so many over there you feel they breed them just to put in orphanages.
o Said while presenting a Duke of Edinburgh Award to a student. When informed that the young man was going to help out in Romania for six months, he asked if the student was going to help the Romanian orphans and was told that he was not; "Duke under fire for Romanian orphans 'joke'". Scotsman. July 8, 2006.
* "Well, you'll never fly in it, you're too fat to be an astronaut."
o Said at the University of Salford to a 13-year-old aspiring astronaut, who was wishing to fly the NOVA rocket; "Gift of the gaffe: Prince Philips top ten embarrassing moments". Daily Mirror. December 14, 2009.
* A gun is no more dangerous than a cricket bat in the hands of a madman.
o "Deaf insulted by duke's remark". BBC. May 27, 1999.
* I just wonder what it would be like to be reincarnated in an animal whose species had been so reduced in numbers than it was in danger of extinction. What would be its feelings toward the human species whose population explosion had denied it somewhere to exist... I must confess that I am tempted to ask for reincarnation as a particularly deadly virus.
o Foreword to Fleur Cowles, If I Were an Animal (William Morrow, publisher, 1987, ISBN 9780688061500)
* Do you know they're now producing eating dogs for the anorexics?
o Said in 2002 to a blind, wheelchair-bound woman who was accompanied by her guide dog; News - Telegraph.
* [That fuse box] "It looks as if it was put in by an Indian."
o Whilst on a tour of a factory in Edinburgh, Scotland, in 1999 Prince Philip pointed out a fuse box that looked quite old. "Long line of princely gaffes". BBC. March 1, 2002.
* How can you tell the difference between them?
o Said to United States President Barack Obama after being told that Obama had met with The Chinese and Russian ambassadors along with David Cameron "Prince Philip makes a faux pas". Youtube. April 1, 2009.
* "There's a lot of your family in tonight"
o Said in November 2009 to a Mr Patel (common Indian Surname) at a reception for 400 British Indian businessmen at Buckingham Palace
* "Are you all one family?"
o Said to black dance troupe Diversity at the 2009 Royal Variety Performance; "Prince Philip asks Diversity, 'Are you all one family?'". The Mirror. December 20, 2009.
* "Oh, what, a strip club?"
o Response to Elizabeth Rendle, a 24-year-old, who, when introduced to the prince, said that she worked as a barmaid in a nightclub. "Prince Philip in strip club gaffe". Yahoo! News. March 12, 2010.
* "Constitutionally I don't exist."
o "Should the royals have real jobs?". BBC. January 27, 2011.
