Here is the TRUE epologiologue to TLOU:
3 years later, Joel and Ellie have found a nice cabin in the mountains where they are living their life. They have not seen the infected for over 1 year now, and they are starting to fiind the formalities of life.
Ellie has developed into a woman, her beasts are large and juicy, and shes got an attitude to match their perkiness. Her buttom is big enough to make any mans head turn, but not big enough to be fat. Joel is the same.
Ellie is in her room reading her joke books, joel enters carrying some wood.
Ellie: Hey Joel, listen to this joke. "Who is the best president .... President Obama'... I don't get it.
Joel: The joke is that he's black.
Ellie: Oh.
Joel: Ellie I need to talk to you.
Ellie: Okay.
Joel: Ellie, I just finished playing Left Behind. Why didn't you tell me you are gay? why did you lead me on? If I knew you were into girls...
Ellie: Joel-san....
Joel: Did I ever tell you about my wife? She is beautiful, intelligent and crazy in the sack. Do you know how long its been since I last had sex? Too long if you ask me.
Ellie remains silent.
Joel: The craziest thing was the fisting. She loved it. She used to beg me. This one time I managed to fit my elbow up inside her, and she was crying. Crying with joy, Ellie.
Ellie: Joel...
Joel: You don't know what it's like to be 40-60 years old and not be touched by a lady. I have to play squash to take my mind off things.
Ellie looks at Joel and a single tear emerges from her eye, she slowly backs onto the bed and takes her pants off. With that she opens her legs and nods at Joel.
Joel: No, Ellie!
Ellie: I want this as much as you do.
Joel hesitates but rolls up his sleeve. Suddenly he sprints towards her and punches her pleasure hole.
Ellie: Yes Joel-San. Yes!
Joel keeps prodding with his hand, as if he was looking for his phone in the bottom of his bag.
Joel: *grunting*
Ellie: Joel-San, you must reach deeper to active my pleasure mode!
Joel grunts and pushes his fist as hard as he can. The intense pressure breaks his elbow, but with that he gives one push and his entire arm is in.
Ellie: uguuuuuuuuuuuuuuuuu!
There is a knock at the door, and a man emerges.
It's David Hayter.
The end.