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[bitbydeath]

Oh, Florida

According to St. Petersburg police, the man walked into his local Target, plucked the doll from the shelf, placed it on the ground, mounted it and began humping the snowman in the middle of the aisle until he ejaculated onto it and put it back on the shelf. He then attempted to do the same again with a giant stuffed unicorn. He was then detained while still in the store by police.

Man Arrested For Indecent "Frozen 2" Toy Act - Dark Horizons

A twenty-year-old man was reportedly arrested for allegedly sexually assaulting a stuffed doll, specifically an Olaf the Snowman from Disney’s upcoming “Frozen 2,” in a Target department store in Florida reports The Daily Star. According to St. Petersburg police, the man walked into his local...

www.darkhorizons.com

 

[brap]

Absolutely based.

 

[WhiskeyDiver]

Do you wanna fill a snowman?

 

[Dirk Benedict]

I was like "the hell did they arrest him for being a dumbass lite for?" Then I read how he spilled spunk, so, there it is. He can enjoy his new status as a registered sex offender.

 

[AnotherOne]

Atleast play with the fuckin thing before you blow your load.

 

[#Phonepunk#]

LOL my grandparents used to live in St. Pete. there is a really nice Dali museum there.

 

[PrCat88]

Reminds me of the serial killer in mindhunter that had sex with the woman's shoe.... the reactions from that are how I expected the Target employees to feel.

 

[Kacho]

He did it with the snowman and not the chicks. What a twist.

 

[Insane Metal]

What in the actual fuck O_O

 

[DeepEnigma]

Get rid of insane asylums they said, let them out into the world they said... watch as they breed they said.

 

[#Phonepunk#]

He did it with the snowman and not the chicks. What a twist.

considering the franchise, this is a good thing! also makes it kinda funny. fucking a real snowman would be impossible, due to the cold.

 

[Elcid]

Wow. He actually came inside it too and put it back on the shelves. That is just wow.

 

[-Arcadia-]

What we see:

What Florida Man sees:

 

[CyberPanda]

Lmao

 

[PrCat88]

What we see:

What Florida Man sees:

 

[iconmaster]

This thread is worthless without pics of the snowman toy.

I choose to believe it was this one:

 

[Starlight Lotice]

He certainly let it go, into the snow.

Daily Star article though....sometimes they post fake stories to get a laugh out of you.

 

[brap]

This thread is worthless without pics of the snowman toy.

You would wanna see the creampie. You would...

 

[888]

St Pete makes Tampa look Normal.

I hate going to St Pete, I’ve seen some shit every time I’m there.

 

[TrainedRage]

How do you "sexualy assault" a doll?

 

[888]

 

[DESTROYA]

For sale at Target Frozen ”stuffed” snowman slightly stained 50% off!

 

[lock2k]

 

[Torrent of Pork]

We allow a few of these people their shenanigans in a bid to dissuade the rest of the country from moving here.

 

[Tesseract]

that sounds like st. pete

 

[Catphish]

I can't even piss in public.

 

[GV82]

What’s his Resetera Username?

 

[Red Crayon Aristocrat]

Why is it always Florida?

 

[MiyazakiHatesKojima]

Cunth really lost his god damn mind

 

[Cybrwzrd]

What did the police say when they caught him with the stuffed unicorn?

Spoiler

Let it go!

 

[epicnemesis]

Wow. Didn’t expect this to be about Olaf.

 

[WindomURL]

But did Olaf cum?

 

[DESTROYA]

 

[SLoWMoTIoN]

I was like "the hell did they arrest him for being a dumbass lite for?" Then I read how he spilled spunk, so, there it is. He can enjoy his new status as a registered sex offender.

Good, I don't want him to own a gun after doing this shit either. He blew his load on a snowmen ffs.

 

[triplestation]

they don't get a lot of snow down there in florida

 

[John Day]

Whats up with G/A/F?? I mean, like, why this shit doesn’t happen in like, Texas or Colorado??

 

[H4ze]

You gotta love Florida

 

[Halo is Back]

At this point we should just remove Florida from the US

 

[Despera]

This thread is worthless without pics of the snowman toy.

I choose to believe it was this one:

It has an "everything will be okay" expression too lol

 

[Mohonky]

Whats up with G/A/F?? I mean, like, why this shit doesn’t happen in like, Texas or Colorado??

Drugs must be better in Florida /shrugs

 

[Tesseract]

At this point we should just remove Florida from the US

you wouldn't survive a month without us, and i truly mean that

 

[Ailynn]

 

[DeepEnigma]

they don't get a lot of snow down there in florida

Oh they get plenty of it, just goes right up the nose.

 

[WhiskeyDiver]

Do you wanna fill a snowman?

I feel so loved.

Just like this Olaf stuffed animal I fucked for the 16th time.

Edit: I have no shame or self respect. This is Olaf #7.

 

[Starlight Lotice]

Florida Men....because they don't see Snow in their State, must have weird Porn fantasies.