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Coughing woman in my office

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D

Dynamite Shikoku

Congratulations, you really deserve it!
There's this woman in my office who has been coughing non-stop for like a week now! Am I going to get TB?? Also, she's fat.
 
A

AlanHemberger

Banned
metdroid said:
There's this woman in my office who has been coughing non-stop for like a week now! Am I going to get TB?? Also, she's fat.
Click to expand...
you're going to get herpes HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA


seriously, try to **** her
 
G

G-Fex

Member
Since she's fat. Does she cough up food? Give her a compliment on how well she coughs then five minutes later you two will be dry humping to the rythmn of her coughs.
 
A

AlanHemberger

Banned
G-Fex said:
Since she's fat. Does she cough up food? Give her a compliment on how well she coughs then five minutes later you two will be dry humping to the rythmn of her coughs.
Click to expand...
you're just full of awesome advice. I swear
 
B

Boards of Canada

Member
That's nothing. I work with a woman who has this rare condition that causes her to cought like once a minute. I'm not even joking. ONCE A MINUTE AT LEAST. Doesn't help she's a loud horse-faced self-centered ****.
 
P

Pochacco

asking dangerous questions
If you want her to stop coughing - the next time she coughs, throw a stapler at her face.
I learned in psychology class that fat people are susceptible to negative reinforcement.
 
M

MrDaravon

Member
I have this woman at work who sneezes SO ****ING LOUD that she can be heard across a floor with 300 people on it, while I am wearing headphones. I seriously want to kill her. And you can tell that she's not even attempting to use tissue or anything, she's just sneezing into air, she's not even attempting to muffle it. It pisses me off just thinking about it.
 
D

demon

I don't mean to alarm you but you have dogs on your face
I have a neighbor in my apartment building who's fat as hell. I bet the bitch coughs non-stop.
 
C

castle007

Banned
I work with a woman on the front desk in a library. When she farts the whole desk shakes. GAF what should I do??? And she is fat and constipated
 
D

Dilbert

Member
Top three causes of chronic cough (assuming the person is a non-smoker):

1) Post-nasal drip, especially as caused by allergies
2) Bronchial asthma
3) Gastroesophageal reflux disorder (GERD)

Possibilities for acute cough lasting >1 week:

1) Post-nasal drip caused by a cold
2) Bronchitis
3) Pneumonia
4) Pertussis
5) Lots of other shit

So, in summary: **** you all. I should seriously ban the whole lot of you.
 
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