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Dating Age |OT$6| Just ask her out already

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I'm just at the point in my life where I'm tired of being treated like shit after constantly bending backwards, being nice, respectful, and helpful toward others. It's not just about her. It's about everyone treating others this way.

Ayyyyyy Lmao. The girl who ghosted you doesn't give a shit about you being an insecure man baby. And nice guys don't stalk women cause they don't wanna date them. We can only hope she calls the cops on you.

Fish for that L though. That'll show everyone LMAO

dKVwW1.gif
 
Hey probs cause I drinking but I really know I can sometimes be a jerk in this forum but I don't mean to but I really appreciate you guys, thanks for just being real with me and stuff it means a lot.

I was wondering, am I the only person who hates movie dates and stuff as a first or second date? There's something about meeting up with someone and then dpending a large time just watching a screen instead
of like dinner when you can talk and struff when you want that annoys me. I'd rather go out for dinner or drinks than a movie.
 
Hey probs cause I drinking but I really know I can sometimes be a jerk in this forum but I don't mean to but I really appreciate you guys, thanks for just being real with me and stuff it means a lot.

I was wondering, am I the only person who hates movie dates and stuff as a first or second date? There's something about meeting up with someone and then dpending a large time just watching a screen instead
of like dinner when you can talk and struff when you want that annoys me. I'd rather go out for dinner or drinks than a movie.

Dinner and/or drinks are better than a movie. But don't pay for them. You'll regret it when they decide to ghost or end it. A real woman will offer either to split or pay her part.
 
I'm just at the point in my life where I'm tired of being treated like shit after constantly bending backwards, being nice, respectful, and helpful toward others. It's not just about her. It's about everyone treating others this way.

giphy.gif


Before you do anything Living The Dream, I suggest you read this;

http://www.doctornerdlove.com/problem-nice-guys/

Then look at what you've just posted. Then work out whats the most obvious reason you were ghosted.
 
I'm having an extremely difficult time getting anywhere. Went on many great dates with a lady and then out of nowhere ghosted. I'm hard pressed to go to her place this weekend and see WTF happened. I demand closure.

No. Going over there today.

Because I'm tired of people treating others this way. It's not right. It's completely rude to do this to someone. I've ended a varying amount of dates but I did so respectfully and coherently. To just disappear is fucking BS.

Nope, it's the principle of it. It'll be the last time she thinks of doing this shit

At this point, it's not even about any of that. She could have said that and I would have accepted it. But now? No fucking regrets.

I'm just at the point in my life where I'm tired of being treated like shit after constantly bending backwards, being nice, respectful, and helpful toward others. It's not just about her. It's about everyone treating others this way.

Dinner and/or drinks are better than a movie. But don't pay for them. You'll regret it when they decide to ghost or end it. A real woman will offer either to split or pay her part.

Just grouping all these together for ease when the police go through your browser history later.

In all seriousness, stop and reread everything you've posted here dude, as if you hadn't posted it. Does this sound rational to you? Would you fist bump a dude saying he was going to go over to an ex-girlfriend's place and yell at her "for the principle of it"? Is that the kind of nice and respectful you are?

Be bitter all you want but don't take it out on the lady. Shit happens, not everything is tied up in a bow with closure.
 
Dinner and/or drinks are better than a movie. But don't pay for them. You'll regret it when they decide to ghost or end it. A real woman will offer either to split or pay her part.

Jesus Christ. I thought maybe you were genuinely pissed off about her ghosting because you caught feelings, but after this shit and all the 'nice guy' trash, you're just pissed you couldn't get your dick wet.

All you were doing was paying for shit hoping those nice gesture tokens would pay off with some sex.

And now you're talking about 'real women'. How about instead of talking about real women you try to be a mature adult and not a whiny and immature manchild who is upset he couldn't cash in his 'nice guy' chips.

Pathetic.
 

gaiages

Banned
Jesus Christ. I thought maybe you were genuinely pissed off about her ghosting because you caught feelings, but after this shit and all the 'nice guy' trash, you're just pissed you couldn't get your dick wet.

All you were doing was paying for shit hoping those nice gesture tokens would pay off with some sex.

And now you're talking about 'real women'. How about instead of talking about real women you try to be a mature adult and not a whiny and immature manchild who is upset he couldn't cash in his 'nice guy' chips.

Pathetic.

Wow my eyes just glazed over that last post

Wow

woooooooooooooooooooooooooow
 

Metroxed

Member
I'm 172cm, yes there is some truth that. But let me tell you, it does not mean you are undateable or unattractive. Is your height all you have to offer? Is that what defines you as a man?

They're not filtering you, in fact they are doing you a service filtering themselves because if they are that shallow that they will not consider someone due to their height then they are probably not someone you want to be in a relationship with anyway.

You can only control, what you can actually control. Height, skin colour, age for example are out of you control. So focus on what you can improve.

You are not out of the game in online dating at all. Do you think that 8cm difference between us was enough that I've been successful with online dating because of 8cm?

Stop feeling sorry for yourself and get that profile made and worry about real issues.

Well, taking a look at the statistics published by OKCupid I'm inclined to say yes. I know I should not focus too much on unchangeable traits, but it doesn't make it any easier. Online dating is superficial by nature (and it's ok, I'm not complaining) because for a woman (or for a man) the next potential partner is just one click away, and given the huge disproportion of men and women on those sites, the chances of someone wanting to date an average-looking but short guy like me instead of the average-looking average-sized guy who is half a click away are too low.

That's why I'm trying to date outside of OkCupid, Tinder and the rest, because those services are not catered for people like me.

Only your height makes you unattractive?

Have you tried working on your other aspects to make yourself more confident rather than just focusing on your height? Is your height the only thing you bring the table?

What about your personality? Pokemon collection?

Keep in mind that no-one in this world in undateable, but people do act in such a way that makes them unattractive and unappealing and I get the feeling you lack confidence which is working against you. Your height doesn't define you and anyone who judges you solely on that one aspect is a cunt.

I'm curious, you mention online dating is out of the question. You've tried it or are you assuming you'll be filtered out because of your height?

Oh, I'm sure it's not only my height that makes me unattractive, but it is the first thing people notice. I mean, it's not the same to be somewhat below the average than to be below even the female average. It's not my defining factor (at least I try it not to make it so) but it is what people notice first, that cannot be helped.

About my personality, I don't think I have it too bad. I'm not as outgoing as I'd like to but I've been trying to use Meetup to get in touch with more people and broaden my social circle (so far I have failed but we'll see). My only real chances of meeting someone to date are by means of extending my social circles, because online dating, clubs and pubs are certainly not for me.

It might sound ridiculous given my position, but no, I have not actually tried online dating. I have had some blank profiles just to look around and then realised how much height seems to matter on these sites, "if you're not x tall don't message", etc. Also I've seen OKCupid statistics, people my size are almost always filtered out. I just don't want to waste my time (or anybody else's), that's all.
 
I'm just at the point in my life where I'm tired of being treated like shit after constantly bending backwards, being nice, respectful, and helpful toward others. It's not just about her. It's about everyone treating others this way.

I hear you, but why not go after some bigger fish?

I'm sure there are some dudes that bother you. Go play tough guy with them, instead of picking on a girl.
 
Well, taking a look at the statistics published by OKCupid

So all of this is just confirmation bias because of some OK Cupid stats? If you don't get over it you'll become a self fulfilling prophecy. I can't get someone because I'm short, so I'm not even going to try, I'm still single because I'm short.
 

Ogodei

Member
Graveyard? Well, that's different.

Cemetaries are a nice place to walk, it's just a tricky subject because some people take death more seriously/spiritually and feel like they shouldn't be used for recreational purposes (which is fine, just one of those deeper things about people that you wouldn't get until further up the dating cycle).
 
Doesn't seem last my last post, posted.

I picked her up, we went to Mitsuwa and had a really good dinner.
Concert went well. We held each other all through the show, it was nice. I had my arm around her, she had my other hand in both her hands. It was dope. She did this finger petting thing. Not gonna lie, I barely paid attention to the show though. I was too focused on her. I kissed her a few times on the back of the neck.

Afterwards, we went to her neighborhood and walked around. She showed me a garden there and we kissed on the lips for the first time. We sat down and cuddled there for an hour, talking. And then we were kicked out around 11.

She walked me back to my car. When we were there, I grabbed her and held her. We were like that for the next three hours. Kissing mixed throughout. She'd giggle and do this sway thing that she does that is super fucking adorable. We were pressed up against each other pretty hard and it was amazing.

It was really nice guys. Really. Fucking nice.

There is a red flag though. She doesn't like how far away I live. At all. About 30 miles.
 
It might sound ridiculous given my position, but no, I have not actually tried online dating. I have had some blank profiles just to look around and then realised how much height seems to matter on these sites, "if you're not x tall don't message", etc. Also I've seen OKCupid statistics, people my size are almost always filtered out. I just don't want to waste my time (or anybody else's), that's all.

You wrote all this shit and haven't even "tried" yet. You serious here? All you ever need is 1 person to respond and it could change everything. I don't even want to give you advice until you set up a profile. You say you don't want to waste your time but you think not trying is a better use of it than 1 hour to make a profile and swipe on some pictures?
 
We did it GAF!

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There is a red flag though. She doesn't like how far away I live. At all. About 30 miles.

Eh, do either of you have transportation? 30 Minutes is less than my commute to work.

Now any more than an hour and it's tough to be spontaneous, but 30 minutes isn't that bad. Especially if there's chemistry.

Also RIP Metroxed. So much good info for you on the first page and you keep whining and looking for validation. You ain't getting it here fam.
Just go out there and TRY. Don't get upset if you fail, just KEEP TRYING.
 

Leeness

Member
Congrats Megalosaro! Keep going!

And creepy ghoster guy, you go tell that girl all those sick burns and every other woman will feel it and know to never ghost you again, because you've figured out the secret Woman Hivemind!

Seriously though, I hope someone calls the cops, it sounds like he's going to hurt her.
 
I went on a walk with a lady friend instead and ranted about her. Even she came to the conclusion that what the ghost lady did was wrong. Anywho, I'm let down and disappointed, but feel much better now. Also these new testosterone doses are having an affect on me too.

Sorry for the scare. Just aggravated.
 
D

Deleted member 10571

Unconfirmed Member
That's why I'm trying to date outside of OkCupid, Tinder and the rest, because those services are not catered for people like me.

Where, if you don't mind me asking? Tinder & the few other online dating thingies I tried don't seem to work for me either, so I'm always interested in other ideas I might overlook.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
Doesn't seem last my last post, posted.

I picked her up, we went to Mitsuwa and had a really good dinner.
Concert went well. We held each other all through the show, it was nice. I had my arm around her, she had my other hand in both her hands. It was dope. She did this finger petting thing. Not gonna lie, I barely paid attention to the show though. I was too focused on her. I kissed her a few times on the back of the neck.

Afterwards, we went to her neighborhood and walked around. She showed me a garden there and we kissed on the lips for the first time. We sat down and cuddled there for an hour, talking. And then we were kicked out around 11.

She walked me back to my car. When we were there, I grabbed her and held her. We were like that for the next three hours. Kissing mixed throughout. She'd giggle and do this sway thing that she does that is super fucking adorable. We were pressed up against each other pretty hard and it was amazing.

It was really nice guys. Really. Fucking nice.

There is a red flag though. She doesn't like how far away I live. At all. About 30 miles.

This makes me smile real big
 
I'm having an extremely difficult time getting anywhere. Went on many great dates with a lady and then out of nowhere ghosted. I'm hard pressed to go to her place this weekend and see WTF happened. I demand closure.

Because I'm tired of people treating others this way. It's not right. It's completely rude to do this to someone. I've ended a varying amount of dates but I did so respectfully and coherently. To just disappear is fucking BS.

Nope, it's the principle of it. It'll be the last time she thinks of doing this shit
845452e362601ba311434a4b80fda390.gif

This is the next level to Johnny Cage In The Shower
 

gaiages

Banned
I went on a walk with a lady friend instead and ranted about her. Even she came to the conclusion that what the ghost lady did was wrong. Anywho, I'm let down and disappointed, but feel much better now. Also these new testosterone doses are having an affect on me too.

Sorry for the scare. Just aggravated.

I'm glad you resolved your frustrations in a healthy manner. :)
 

War Peaceman

You're a big guy.
I went on a walk with a lady friend instead and ranted about her. Even she came to the conclusion that what the ghost lady did was wrong. Anywho, I'm let down and disappointed, but feel much better now. Also these new testosterone doses are having an affect on me too.

Sorry for the scare. Just aggravated.

Nobody said what she did was right, just that you DONT GO TO PEOPLE'S HOUSES unless expressly invited, or you are a postman.
 

Unai

Member
So, I'm seeing this girl for almost 3 months now. We have very good chemistry. I have already met her family and she has met my friends. A little more than one month after we started seeing each other I took her to the graduation party of my best friend's wife (J), and in that party I asked J to take a photo with me without asking my girlfriend to be in the picture as well. A couple of days latter I posted those pictures on Facebook and the main picture was the one with me and J. Oh boy, was that a mistake!

I couldn't tell there as everything seemed fine, but this upset her a lot. Like really, really much. In retrospect I realize that what I did was a dick move, but I thought she would be over it fast. That didn't happen. She seems to have lost trust on me and attribute it to that event. She suspects that I might have some kind of secret admiration for J or something like that.

For reference, today I went to the bathroom and took my cellphone with me. I was basically browsing gaf, facebook or something. She asked if I was talking with someone who I didn't want her to see. After laughing a little and explaining what I was doing she didn't buy it. She says that she doesn't take her phone to the bathroom nor know of anyone who does it, and brought back the graduation party thing again.

I guess that she has trust issues because of her last boyfriend. I don't know if I can keep a relationship with someone who can't trust me in the most basic level.

What are your opinions on this? What I did was really that bad and I shall avoid it like hell (like on the next relationship if we break up) or is she overreacting a little?

We're both 30+ years old if that makes any difference.
 
So, I'm seeing this girl for almost 3 months now. We have very good chemistry. I have already met her family and she has met my friends. A little more than one month after we started seeing each other I took her to the graduation party of my best friend's wife (J), and in that party I asked J to take a photo with me without asking my girlfriend to be in the picture as well. A couple of days latter I posted those pictures on Facebook and the main picture was the one with me and J. Oh boy, was that a mistake!

I couldn't tell there as everything seemed fine, but this upset her a lot. Like really, really much. In retrospect I realize that what I did was a dick move, but I thought she would be over it fast. That didn't happen. She seems to have lost trust on me and attribute it to that event. She suspects that I might have some kind of secret admiration for J or something like that.

For reference, today I went to the bathroom and took my cellphone with me. I was basically browsing gaf, facebook or something. She asked if I was talking with someone who I didn't want her to see. After laughing a little and explaining what I was doing she didn't buy it. She says that she doesn't take her phone to the bathroom nor know of anyone who does it, and brought back the graduation party thing again.

I guess that she has trust issues because of her last boyfriend. I don't know if I can keep a relationship with someone who can't trust me in the most basic level.

What are your opinions on this? What I did was really that bad and I shall avoid it like hell (like on the next relationship if we break up) or is she overreacting a little?

We're both 30+ years old if that makes any difference.
She doesn't sound her age. This is her jealousy issues she needs to sort out for herself. The fact that she keeps on bringing up that event makes her sound obsessed. You know already what our advice is gonna be, just be wary if she starts controlling your interactions then it's time to bail.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
So, I'm seeing this girl for almost 3 months now. We have very good chemistry. I have already met her family and she has met my friends. A little more than one month after we started seeing each other I took her to the graduation party of my best friend's wife (J), and in that party I asked J to take a photo with me without asking my girlfriend to be in the picture as well. A couple of days latter I posted those pictures on Facebook and the main picture was the one with me and J. Oh boy, was that a mistake!

I couldn't tell there as everything seemed fine, but this upset her a lot. Like really, really much. In retrospect I realize that what I did was a dick move, but I thought she would be over it fast. That didn't happen. She seems to have lost trust on me and attribute it to that event. She suspects that I might have some kind of secret admiration for J or something like that.

For reference, today I went to the bathroom and took my cellphone with me. I was basically browsing gaf, facebook or something. She asked if I was talking with someone who I didn't want her to see. After laughing a little and explaining what I was doing she didn't buy it. She says that she doesn't take her phone to the bathroom nor know of anyone who does it, and brought back the graduation party thing again.

I guess that she has trust issues because of her last boyfriend. I don't know if I can keep a relationship with someone who can't trust me in the most basic level.

What are your opinions on this? What I did was really that bad and I shall avoid it like hell (like on the next relationship if we break up) or is she overreacting a little?

We're both 30+ years old if that makes any difference.

I thought yall were like 17-20 until I saw the bolded. She's just a reaally jealous person. You're not in the wrong, at all. It's your BESTFRIEND's wife for god's sake.
 
I don't want to say bail because maybe you can talk to her and let her know you don't appreciate being accused of stupid shit, but I have to be honest, I don't see that kind of behaviour going away, especially if you're the first boyfriend after what I assume was a cheating ex?

If trust issues are setting in this early, it's pretty much game over for anything long term. She'll be suspicious of any woman you talk to, any woman you take a pic with, any woman you're alone with. She'll constantly question everything you do and who you're talking to, it will reach a point where she'll start asking to see your phone and when you refuse, she'll accuse of you cheating, talking to someone else, etc.

I have to ask. can you explain how you posting a pic of you with your best friends wife was a dick move?
 
We are looking inside the mind of a nice guy here. And it's terrifying.

Blaming it on testosterone injections is some hilarious shit.

Yeah, testosterone injections make you post shit like this...

Dinner and/or drinks are better than a movie. But don't pay for them. You'll regret it when they decide to ghost or end it. A real woman will offer either to split or pay her part.

Okay.
 

Unai

Member
I don't want to say bail because maybe you can talk to her and let her know you don't appreciate being accused of stupid shit, but I have to be honest, I don't see that kind of behaviour going away, especially if you're the first boyfriend after what I assume was a cheating ex?

If trust issues are setting in this early, it's pretty much game over for anything long term. She'll be suspicious of any woman you talk to, any woman you take a pic with, any woman you're alone with. She'll constantly question everything you do and who you're talking to, it will reach a point where she'll start asking to see your phone and when you refuse, she'll accuse of you cheating, talking to someone else, etc.

I have to ask. can you explain how you posting a pic of you with your best friends wife was a dick move?


She isn't sure if he cheated on her, but one year into her last relationship the guy got a personal message from his last girlfriend, and she saw it when she took his phone to see the time (the notification was in the rest screen, she didn't open the message app). Things were never the same ever since, and she says it was on of the reasons they broke up. But yeah, I'm the first one after him.

The dick move is because I stand up for a minute and rushed to ask for the picture, letting her there alone, so I can see where she's coming from.

I going to see her again in less than an hour.


To put things in context, I have fooled around but she is my first real girlfriend ever. Up to now I'm didn't meet the parents of any girl that I was with nor had I introduced one to my friends that they didn't know already. So I accept that I might be clueless about what is socially acceptable and what isn't.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
She isn't sure if he cheated on her, but one year into her last relationship the guy got a personal message from his last girlfriend, and she saw it when she took his phone to see the time (the notification was in the rest screen, she didn't open the message app). Things were never the same ever since, and she says it was on of the reasons they broke up. But yeah, I'm the first one after him.

The dick move is because I stand up for a minute and rushed to ask for the picture, letting her there alone, so I can see where she's coming from.

I going to see her again in less than an hour.


To put things in context, I have fooled around but she is my first real girlfriend ever. Up to now I'm didn't meet the parents of any girl that I was with nor had I introduced one to my friends that they didn't know already. So I accept that I might be clueless about what is socially acceptable and what isn't.

I mean, she's probably gonna see something insignificant that happens with you, and "Things will never be the same"

How are things never the same because you saw that a message popped up? What if that message was "Hey, I think I left _______ over your house. When it's not weird, you can drop it off. I know you have a girl, bring her if you want."
 
GAF, I haven't slept in 36 hours and I'm partying with some Brazilians. I keep making out with one, but I hope more show up.

I just had grilled cheese and bacon.

My friend is meeting us at another festival and possible after party.

I can't tell if I'm tired or drunk. But I haven't drank anything since 7am.
 

Ray Wonder

Founder of the Wounded Tagless Children
GAF, I haven't slept in 36 hours and I'm partying with some Brazilians. I keep making out with one, but I hope more show up.

I just had grilled cheese and bacon.

My friend is meeting us at another festival and possible after party.

I can't tell if I'm tired or drunk. But I haven't drank anything since 7am.

Are you on Acid? or like Coke?
 
There is a red flag though. She doesn't like how far away I live. At all. About 30 miles.

That ain't shit for the night ya'll had. Just tell her and see what she says. Gratz on the nice date. It's cool you were so attentive to her.

My night with lady went well too. Dinner, hangout, go out with her co-workers to a club and she let me pick her outfit (I dolled her up real nice), bumped and grinded for a few hours, made out a bunch, and went home. Dude, the feeling of starting out with someone new is unmatched.

Thanks to bacon for the kind words after our tussle. Honestly made the day feel blessed by a stranger lol

I started the date by saying sorry about kinda ghosting on our emotional text conversation. Admitted i was scared I didn't want to push so far so early, but I told her I wasn't worried about that anymore. Told her I wanted to say all those things to her face . Went over very positively .
 

Lulubop

Member
GAF, I haven't slept in 36 hours and I'm partying with some Brazilians. I keep making out with one, but I hope more show up.

I just had grilled cheese and bacon.

My friend is meeting us at another festival and possible after party.

I can't tell if I'm tired or drunk. But I haven't drank anything since 7am.

my man
 

gaiages

Banned
GAF, I haven't slept in 36 hours and I'm partying with some Brazilians. I keep making out with one, but I hope more show up.

I just had grilled cheese and bacon.

My friend is meeting us at another festival and possible after party.

I can't tell if I'm tired or drunk. But I haven't drank anything since 7am.

rip

Blaming it on testosterone injections is some hilarious shit.

Yeah, testosterone injections make you post shit like this...



Okay.

Well, an overload of testosterone does make you irrational, just like how estrogen can lol. Though yeah, that last post can't really be explained away, though at least he didn't go through with that craziness.
 
Dinner and/or drinks are better than a movie. But don't pay for them. You'll regret it when they decide to ghost or end it. A real woman will offer either to split or pay her part.

I'll pay for them depending on the situation, like if I specifically want to eat at somewhere pricey. I'm sober now and the stuff you're saying is pretty darn vitriolic. But that's done now, let's move on.
 

Metroxed

Member
Where, if you don't mind me asking? Tinder & the few other online dating thingies I tried don't seem to work for me either, so I'm always interested in other ideas I might overlook.

Well, in my particular case bars don't work either, so what I try to do is just extend my social circles putting myself in situations where I can meet and befriend people (using Meetup for example). I am not using it directly for dating but I guess that if you meet enough people and socialise with them you're bound to click with someone.
 

gaiages

Banned
The only part I would even agree with. Can't stand dude's footing the bill for a date so I always split the bill 50/50. Whenever my friend's mention their date's paying for everything I just say "You're a grown ass woman, chip in!" Haha!

Ehhhh, just because a woman lets a man foot a bill doesn't make them 'not a real woman'. I mean, I always would split the bill unless they insist, but it's not really a huge red flag or a sign of maturity about whether or not they pay.

For real?

Yes, for real? Going to someone's house to teach them a lesson about how to treat men sounds verbally threatening, at the very least. That wasn't really subtle.
 

Peltz

Member
Doesn't seem last my last post, posted.

I picked her up, we went to Mitsuwa and had a really good dinner.
Concert went well. We held each other all through the show, it was nice. I had my arm around her, she had my other hand in both her hands. It was dope. She did this finger petting thing. Not gonna lie, I barely paid attention to the show though. I was too focused on her. I kissed her a few times on the back of the neck.

Afterwards, we went to her neighborhood and walked around. She showed me a garden there and we kissed on the lips for the first time. We sat down and cuddled there for an hour, talking. And then we were kicked out around 11.

She walked me back to my car. When we were there, I grabbed her and held her. We were like that for the next three hours. Kissing mixed throughout. She'd giggle and do this sway thing that she does that is super fucking adorable. We were pressed up against each other pretty hard and it was amazing.

It was really nice guys. Really. Fucking nice.

There is a red flag though. She doesn't like how far away I live. At all. About 30 miles.

That was the first kiss? Well... you move slow, but at least you're moving man. Nicely done.

Distance can be a bitch, but just let her know you think she's worth it (if that's how you genuinely feel that is).
 
in that party I asked J to take a photo with me without asking my girlfriend to be in the picture as well. A couple of days latter I posted those pictures on Facebook and the main picture was the one with me and J. Oh boy, was that a mistake!

Sounds to me like your dating my Ex wife, so much matches up in her behaviour.Yes, it was insensitive. Not taking the picture but making it the main Facebook picture. When you're in a relationship you learn to avoid things like this that are innocent if you are single but can be misconstrued when you are in a relationship.

That should be the end of the advice but oh boy, you've uncovered the crazy

I couldn't tell there as everything seemed fine, but this upset her a lot. Like really, really much. In retrospect I realize that what I did was a dick move, but I thought she would be over it fast. That didn't happen. She seems to have lost trust on me and attribute it to that event. She suspects that I might have some kind of secret admiration for J or something like that.

She's dwelling on it and escalating it in her mind. This path will lead her to look for things that aren't there and her confirmation bias will FIND things that aren't there.

For reference, today I went to the bathroom and took my cellphone with me. I was basically browsing gaf, facebook or something. She asked if I was talking with someone who I didn't want her to see. After laughing a little and explaining what I was doing she didn't buy it. She says that she doesn't take her phone to the bathroom nor know of anyone who does it, and brought back the graduation party thing again.

Everyone takes their phone to the bathroom.

I guess that she has trust issues because of her last boyfriend.

I guarantee it's not the last boyfriend, think back when did she first mention this? How many times? Did she play the victim and use it to get attention from you?

I don't know if I can keep a relationship with someone who can't trust me in the most basic level.

You can't, this is going to get much worse.

What are your opinions on this? What I did was really that bad and I shall avoid it like hell (like on the next relationship if we break up) or is she overreacting a little?

Bail out, respect yourself and avoid this drama. If you've got one girlfriend, you can get another, who cares if you've met her parents? It's not a rite of passage anymore.

We're both 30+ years old if that makes any difference.

Not for you as you say it's your first relationship. But for her at 30+ it's a massive red flag.

She isn't sure if he cheated on her,

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but one year into her last relationship the guy got a personal message from his last girlfriend, and she saw it when she took his phone to see the time (the notification was in the rest screen, she didn't open the message app).

She snooped his phone and looked at his messages. This overly detailed explanation from her is just cover for her being a snooper.

Things were never the same ever since, and she says it was on of the reasons they broke up.

That dude did the smart thing and bailed.

The dick move is because I stand up for a minute and rushed to ask for the picture, letting her there alone, so I can see where she's coming from.

Bruh, once you start rationalizing her behavior and blaming yourself you are starting down that path where you validate her insecurities. She'll be constantly looking on your phone, questioning women you talk to, talk about or even look at

So I accept that I might be clueless about what is socially acceptable and what isn't.

You made a small mistake that uncovered a big flaw in her. I can assume perhaps there were things she said when you started dating that the more experienced person in relationships would have seen as red flags you might be oblivious to because your blinded by the fact that she's your first girlfriend and you think you've finally made it.
 
Ehhhh, just because a woman lets a man foot a bill doesn't make them 'not a real woman'.

Guess it's just the way I'm wired. I lose a lot of respect for other women, or hell, just about anyone who doesn't pay their way for a meal or a date, I always feel like both parties should invest in a date. If I'd ever let someone pay for my date I'd feel like a child who couldn't afford to pay for anything myself.
 
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