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Okcupid is not that bad. I already got a date!

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Congrats breh.. after reading your post I was like fuck it ain't gonna try too hard and just say hi lol. Let me see how this goes hehe

... isn't that.... the opposite of what his post said to do...

Any message that just says hi or how are you will get completely ignored by me. If you want to start a conversation with someone you need more than that, don't expect them to do the work, you're the one initiating the conversation after all. Keep it short and sweet but at least ask something so they have something to work with.
You guys are right. That post was made around 3am. And I was Not on top of my senses. Im not even sure if I sent a "hi" messega on Okc at that time.

Edit: and I sent one lol. She hasn't responded. And I'm not surprised she didn't.
 

y2dvd

Member
Congrats dude!

Did she give any ideas for a good opener for the guys to use?

Not really. With me, she actually made the initiative. There was a Goldilocks rule of sorts she mentioned. No one liners and no essay. Some people have sent her their life's story. I guess 3 sentences is ideal? Usually mentioning something in her profile was a good start.
 
Reactivated my profile last week (after a messy breakup about 8 weeks ago, details of which can be found in dating-age for those so inclined). Been chatting to a guy and we've swapped numbers with the intention of going for a drink next week. Not sure how I feel about it actually, but I'll see how I feel when we meet and if it's too soon then I'll be honest.
 
Reactivated my profile last week (after a messy breakup about 8 weeks ago, details of which can be found in dating-age for those so inclined). Been chatting to a guy and we've swapped numbers with the intention of going for a drink next week. Not sure how I feel about it actually, but I'll see how I feel when we meet and if it's too soon then I'll be honest.

I followed your story through the thread.

Glad to see you getting back out there, electric.

Take it one step at a time.
 

A Human Becoming

More than a Member
Do you believe that there exists a statistical correlation between race and intelligence?
Yes
An instance where nurture wins
i4voVwKvHwhwO.gif
 
Thanks! I do give up cold after a long while with no response. Rarely do I give out my number or request to meet early on though. I did follow that advice just now and was able to get a number and a tentative meeting with the girl I was talking to so it works! It's just very hard to gauge who wants things to progress fast and who wants to keep things at screen length for a while.

These are the people I stop talking to. I ask to meet after 6-12 messages. If they're not ready to meet up at that point, I'm not interested in investing more time in them. I was chatting with one woman and things seemed to be going really well. I asked if she wanted to meet up, and she asked me if I ever go on gchat. I didn't even bother to respond, I just deleted our conversation. It's perfectly fine if some people are more comfortable having an online interaction, but I have no interest in that. The women I date have tended to be the same way. You shouldn't waste time with someone who has radically different priorities than you.

So I've been talking to a girl for one day, she is online right now but isn't talking to me. Do I give up?

I open up okc multiple times a day out of boredom, but I only have the energy to send out/respond to messages like once a week. Not everybody rushes to respond to every message immediately. You really need to not take okc seriously.
 
I've been playing around with OKC a bit out of boredom, and did some scripting to scrape match question data from random 5-star profiles, similar to what this guy did in this Wired article.Thought I'd share some of the results here.

The format is "number of responses | question: percentage of response: response". Quote to see the 20 most popular questions/responses.



Plus a few more I thought were interesting:

 
Finally got back on the site after a bit of a hiatus
Been having some good luck meeting people (if you have a cute dog, make damn sure you post a picture of you with it), and have been dating casually

So it's been quite good, but I can't help but feel I want something a bit more serious and haven't really been able to get any luck in that department. I probably shouldn't complain, perhaps it's just a fleeting mood, but for whatever reason I feel like that's something missing in my life that i'd like
 

Jhoan

Member
@vicissitudes, none of those results really surprise me at all. If anything, it reaffirms how people are more liberal/open more accepting in this day and age.

After getting back on the OKC horse these past few days, I've sent out several messages and gotten replies from 2. One of the girls is in an open relationship who seems like she's looking for casual fun so that's interesting. I doubt that any of the 2 girls will lead to dates since I'm skeptical so I'll keep casting a wide net and see what I catch by sending 10-15 messages a day.

I think I have a pretty solid profile and solid pictures (sans animals since I don't any pets) that I'm getting replies. Although I keep getting matched up with bisexuals and vegetarians for some odd reason. If anyone wants me to post my profile, let me know; I think as a Hispanic messaging mostly White and Asian women (some Hispanic) it's harder to get replies because people have stigmas about us.
 
@vicissitudes, none of those results really surprise me at all. If anything, it reaffirms how people are more liberal/open more accepting in this day and age.

After getting back on the OKC horse these past few days, I've sent out several messages and gotten replies from 2. One of the girls is in an open relationship who seems like she's looking for casual fun so that's interesting. I doubt that any of the 2 girls will lead to dates since I'm skeptical so I'll keep casting a wide net and see what I catch by sending 10-15 messages a day.

I think I have a pretty solid profile and solid pictures (sans animals since I don't any pets) that I'm getting replies. Although I keep getting matched up with bisexuals and vegetarians for some odd reason. If anyone wants me to post my profile, let me know; I think as a Hispanic messaging mostly White and Asian women (some Hispanic) it's harder to get replies because people have stigmas about us.

Bisexuals and vegetarians? Wanna switch?

I know about the stigma of trying to approach white and Asian women on online profiles.
A few weeks ago I posted on the thread about a girl who turned me down because I wasn't white @_@.

Go figure, we can't catch a fucking break.
 

Jhoan

Member
Bisexuals and vegetarians? Wanna switch?

I know about the stigma of trying to approach white and Asian women on online profiles.
A few weeks ago I posted on the thread about a girl who turned me down because I wasn't white @_@.

Go figure, we can't catch a fucking break.
Haha, I don't know what it is with being an artist that the algorithms pair me up with them. I imagine dating a vegetarian or a girl who doesn't drink would be a bit hard for me to get along with. It's usually nerdy girls that I have a higher chance of receiving a reply from(not that I'm looking exclusively for nerdy girls to hit up). If anything, you should be happy that you made a tiny blip on their radar. I think I'll try hitting up more younger girls and even get rid of my intimidation of older women and message them as well; older women is an unexplored avenue for me.

I saw that post but hey you can't win them all. Despite the fact that interracial dating is more accepted/common in this day and age, some people will always have their preferences to dating exclusively within one ethnic/racial group. I didn't list my ethnitcity on my profile; there should be an option for Human since that's what we all are.

I was on a white girl's profile who'd been to multiple countries and founded a website. Her main picture is a medium close up shot of her wearing a visor and a black bikini top. My brother and I said that she's probably one of the girls that easily gets 100 messages a day. Most of the white girls who's profiles I've viewed mostly live in Brooklyn and with roommates.
Hey, I'm asian so we are like the least desired guys lol.
Nah son, girls love the spiky hair that you guys have going. Plus human calculators and the charisma that I've found in several Asian friends. They're probably put off by the preconceived notion that all of you have thick accents no thanks to movies such as Breakfast At Tiffany's and then there's the facial hair situation.

I've posted my profile before in here so I'll throw it out there again: https://www.okcupid.com/profile/heightsartist
 

Tsukumo

Member
Man, my profile went from getting hits all the time on match to none now =/

Talked to a few women, went on some dates and still getting nowhere.

Im starting to regret the price tag I paid for on Match.

try and mix up the order of the photos in your album, or add a new one, or change a couple of lines in your presentation. Match gives priority in searches to people who "move around" their profiles or people with new profiles.
Also, don't resort to the "search" option. Click on the "similar profiles" button and the site will open up many, many more profiles: if you stick to the search option you'll keep getting the same results since they are based on fixed criteria established by elements in your profile: your age, your physical appearance, your salary, and so on and so on.
Clicking on "similar profiles" overrides these limitations.
 
Haha, I don't know what it is with being an artist that the algorithms pair me up with them. I imagine dating a vegetarian or a girl who doesn't drink would be a bit hard for me to get along with. It's usually nerdy girls that I have a higher chance of receiving a reply from(not that I'm looking exclusively for nerdy girls to hit up). If anything, you should be happy that you made a tiny blip on their radar. I think I'll try hitting up more younger girls and even get rid of my intimidation of older women and message them as well; older women is an unexplored avenue for me.

I saw that post but hey you can't win them all. Despite the fact that interracial dating is more accepted/common in this day and age, some people will always have their preferences to dating exclusively within one ethnic/racial group. I didn't list my ethnitcity on my profile; there should be an option for Human since that's what we all are.

I was on a white girl's profile who'd been to multiple countries and founded a website. Her main picture is a medium close up shot of her wearing a visor and a black bikini top. My brother and I said that she's probably one of the girls that easily gets 100 messages a day. Most of the white girls who's profiles I've viewed mostly live in Brooklyn and with roommates.

Nah son, girls love the spiky hair that you guys have going. Plus human calculators and the charisma that I've found in several Asian friends. They're probably put off by the preconceived notion that all of you have thick accents no thanks to movies such as Breakfast At Tiffany's and then there's the facial hair situation.

I've posted my profile before in here so I'll throw it out there again: https://www.okcupid.com/profile/heightsartist

I think what's funny about the Brooklyn "Lena Dunhan" girls is that they're snotty but in like the "I'm too good for you" way that really makes approaching or even having a conversation really jarring. Must be nice to be in that perfectly compact bubble that is Williamsburg.

Word of advice: your photos are too dark. I can't see what you look like.

Throw in a great portrait shot to show off the gains.
 

Jhoan

Member
I think what's funny about the Brooklyn "Lena Dunhan" girls is that they're snotty but in like the "I'm too good for you" way that really makes approaching or even having a conversation really jarring. Must be nice to be in that perfectly compact bubble that is Williamsburg.

Word of advice: your photos are too dark. I can't see what you look like.

Throw in a great portrait shot to show off the gains.
Yup. Gotta love Girls for making Williamsburg an already more alluring area. I hate that whole pretentious attitude with a passion. Been to a few art shows at my college where the atmosphere felt pretentious.

Admittedly, I've been lazy with the gym lately due to school but plan on getting my ass into it (read: lack motivation). Good thing I shoot in RAW+ JPEG so I can adjust the brightness of the images/white balance. Will do. While it's almost a year old, I think I have a good portrait picture I can use.
 
There are a stupid amount of girls that I'm matched with that are single and looking for guys who like girls, that are single to be friends. I assume that they don't just want friendship if they specify single guys but why they can't just say what they're actually after baffles me.
 
Signed up for this 3 months ago but I think I'm doing it wrong... I don't have a date but moderation tools access...

SEpCU.gif


Though they also sorted me to the pretty ones, that was nice.
 

Jhoan

Member
There are a stupid amount of girls that I'm matched with that are single and looking for guys who like girls, that are single to be friends. I assume that they don't just want friendship if they specify single guys but why they can't just say what they're actually after baffles me.
I don't doubt that people genuinely use the website to make new friends when they're new to a city but sometimes I think people put friends as a farce for a more casual relationship.

I was reading through a feminist's profile that questioned why dudes put new friends along side short term and long distance relationships instead of being straight up. I have new friends alongside the said two because if there's no chemistry in a date with a girl and I think she's cool, then I would at the very least like to remain friends. There's several GAF members here who met women from OKC and went on to make friends with the ones where it didn't work out.

That being said don't let that stop you from messaging them. You have absolutely nothing to lose by doing so.

So a bit of a small update from me though it's not much. I added in a close up shot and made it my main picture and increased the brightness on the previous main picture for better clarity. I got a 5 star rating from an uninteresting looking girl and a reply from another girl I had messaged I want to say 2 days ago. We had an instant back and forth going earlier before I replied again. Haven't gotten another one ever since but hopefully it was because she was busy.

@SolidusDave, I'm a moderator as well but honestly I don't think it's a big deal. It is somewhat entertaining to sift through flagged images when I'm super bored of browsing websites. I've seen a few dongs, but it's mostly fake pictures, memes, pictures of pets, and art work that are the most commonly flagged images.

If anything, it's fascinating and funny to see some poor girl's profile get flagged because she has a picture of a crappy quote that you see on Instagram/Facebook as one of her pictures.
 
Signed up for this 3 months ago but I think I'm doing it wrong... I don't have a date but moderation tools access...

SEpCU.gif


Though they also sorted me to the pretty ones, that was nice.
Hahaha, that's pretty funyy.

Anyway, I think I'm gonna take another break until my match queue gets better. Nobody's messaging back and I've probably hit up like 300 girls over the past six months. And like all of my matches above 70% haven't responded.
qHxkt.gif
 

Piecake

Member
So, just signed up for this a little while ago and have a few questions. What is their policy on telling you who likes you? I mean, I received a few emails telling me so and so rated me highly, but there are a lot more people who like me in that quick-match tab. Whats up with that? Do they only email you a few profiles who like you or include people who rated you 3 stars in it as well?

Also, any girl on here willing to giving me some tips/harsh criticism on my profile? I'd have to PM you the link because I am not willing to post it for everyone to see (Internet be scary). Thanks.
 

FelixOrion

Poet Centuriate
I've deactivated my account 3 time previously and it's been almost 5 months deactivated this time, but thinking about giving it one last short go now that I've moved. Might was well really burn my profile to the ground and re-write it but I feel my profile writing and my message writing are just not 'witty' or 'funny' to such a degree that I feel I'm always gonna be fighting a losing battle with them.
 
D

Deleted member 74300

Unconfirmed Member
Amazing how certain people can jump to conclusions, try to make you feel bad, or be hypocritical at certain questions. Won't say which ones they are but I'm more impressed the fact they even bothered to look at them in the first place. So basically be careful answering some trick bullshit questions because either way you'll lose with your answer somehow even if you're logical and reasonable about it.
 

120v

Member
they gave me mod tools as well. i was kind of baffled by it but i guess it makes sense spreading mod duties to non problem accounts.

after a month of excruciating attempts I FINALLY got a date with a (seemingly) quality girl. i felt like a brain surgeon trying to word my messages just right
 

Jhoan

Member
So, just signed up for this a little while ago and have a few questions. What is their policy on telling you who likes you? I mean, I received a few emails telling me so and so rated me highly, but there are a lot more people who like me in that quick-match tab. Whats up with that? Do they only email you a few profiles who like you or include people who rated you 3 stars in it as well?

Also, any girl on here willing to giving me some tips/harsh criticism on my profile? I'd have to PM you the link because I am not willing to post it for everyone to see (Internet be scary). Thanks.
By default you have email alerts turned on for when you get messages, rated highly, Quiver matches, and special offers. You only receive those email alerts when someone rates you 4-5 stars on a Quickmatch. It's then up to you to decide whether or not to rate them back. Women use this as a poke so they won't have to send you a message. The other type of email you email you get is the aforementioned Quiver matches where you get sent 3 profiles that their algorithm think best suit you and your interests.

For profile stuff, you can PM electricshake, Lucian Cat, Pau, Devolution, or someone else by checking the Girl GAF thread.
I've deactivated my account 3 time previously and it's been almost 5 months deactivated this time, but thinking about giving it one last short go now that I've moved. Might was well really burn my profile to the ground and re-write it but I feel my profile writing and my message writing are just not 'witty' or 'funny' to such a degree that I feel I'm always gonna be fighting a losing battle with them.
Honestly, I feel like it's too much pressure to make your profile funny/witty. I would say as long as you sound genuine and your personality is shining through, it doesn't really matter.

It's okay to throw in some sarcasm here and there but most people go straight for the pictures first before reading the profile. The profile is there as meat for people to chew on and give women a reason to message you. If anything, like I told Piecake, definitely PM it to any of the aforementioned female GAF members as they'll definitely give you some good feedback and point out stuff you might not have noticed. I think I might follow suit as well to be on the safe side.
they gave me mod tools as well. i was kind of baffled by it but i guess it makes sense spreading mod duties to non problem accounts.

after a month of excruciating attempts I FINALLY got a date with a (seemingly) quality girl. i felt like a brain surgeon trying to word my messages just right
Enjoy the lingo that mods use.

That's pretty good man. It goes to show that someone is bound to be interested enough to meet up. I hope that you're still hitting up more girls despite getting one date out of it. Good luck and let us know how it goes.

Speaking of which, so I mentioned having a back and forth going with this girl on Friday before she went cold. It turned out that she replied last night to my surprise.

I'm going to roll the dice and give her my number with this next reply since the conversation is running dry (I introduced myself and asked her to guess how my real name is pronounced to which she replied with an incorrect name with a question mark). The fact that I've held her interest for so long means I think I have good chance of meeting up with her.
 

120v

Member
blargh I may have gotten a false flag. I just noticed the girl I'm supposed to meet up with has "new friends" exclusively on her profile and it says she's seeking "everyone" and she's straight.

the caveat to that is we've been talking on the phone everyday (she calls, I don't) and back before we started talking she gave my profile the five star thingy, which i guess she wouldn't do if i was somebody she wanted to be "just friends" with. so i take it as code for she's on the rebound or whatever

but the "new friends" people piss me off... nothing wrong with making new friends on okc but why not got to meetup.com or something if that's truly what you're looking for. it just makes things confusing
 

y2dvd

Member
I don't doubt that people genuinely use the website to make new friends when they're new to a city but sometimes I think people put friends as a farce for a more casual relationship.

I was reading through a feminist's profile that questioned why dudes put new friends along side short term and long distance relationships instead of being straight up. I have new friends alongside the said two because if there's no chemistry in a date with a girl and I think she's cool, then I would at the very least like to remain friends. There's several GAF members here who met women from OKC and went on to make friends with the ones where it didn't work out.

That being said don't let that stop you from messaging them. You have absolutely nothing to lose by doing so.

So a bit of a small update from me though it's not much. I added in a close up shot and made it my main picture and increased the brightness on the previous main picture for better clarity. I got a 5 star rating from an uninteresting looking girl and a reply from another girl I had messaged I want to say 2 days ago. We had an instant back and forth going earlier before I replied again. Haven't gotten another one ever since but hopefully it was because she was busy.

@SolidusDave, I'm a moderator as well but honestly I don't think it's a big deal. It is somewhat entertaining to sift through flagged images when I'm super bored of browsing websites. I've seen a few dongs, but it's mostly fake pictures, memes, pictures of pets, and art work that are the most commonly flagged images.

If anything, it's fascinating and funny to see some poor girl's profile get flagged because she has a picture of a crappy quote that you see on Instagram/Facebook as one of her pictures.

This is what should be flagged if it's the first photo:
quote pics
animal pics
group pics
baby pics
fake mustache pics (I hate this with a passion)
weird angles

<----Grumpy old man

My ratio from responses to actual messages sent is still like 1 to 500 lol but I landed a date with a gorgeous Latin lady this Saturday. She's way outta my league looks wise so I'm a bit intimidated lol.
 

Maddocks

Member
the best thing about being a mod is seeing the comments people leave on flagged pictures. Sometimes you will get another mod who accidentally uses the comment section as a message sender and hits on the girl/guy.

Sometimes you get random boobs and whatnot so that's fun. Other times a guy will post his penis like 40 times and you have to look at the same penis in 40 different shades of light. Then you end up clicking delete for 5 minutes straight.
 

Jhoan

Member
blargh I may have gotten a false flag. I just noticed the girl I'm supposed to meet up with has "new friends" exclusively on her profile and it says she's seeking "everyone" and she's straight.

the caveat to that is we've been talking on the phone everyday (she calls, I don't) and back before we started talking she gave my profile the five star thingy, which i guess she wouldn't do if i was somebody she wanted to be "just friends" with. so i take it as code for she's on the rebound or whatever

but the "new friends" people piss me off... nothing wrong with making new friends on okc but why not got to meetup.com or something if that's truly what you're looking for. it just makes things confusing
Dude, I think you're reading way too much into it. I'm pretty sure that girls put looking for new friends so they won't seem desperate. Obviously she probably has and is looking to date people.

I'm also pretty damn sure that that girl likes you from the way you describe it that she calls you every day. Why else would she give you a 4-5 star rating in the first place? You're throwing up your arms up in a fit of rage for nothing and you haven't even met up with her yet. Don't dismiss her over this little thing.
This is what should be flagged if it's the first photo:
quote pics
animal pics
group pics
baby pics
fake mustache pics (I hate this with a passion)
weird angles

<----Grumpy old man

My ratio from responses to actual messages sent is still like 1 to 500 lol but I landed a date with a gorgeous Latin lady this Saturday. She's way outta my league looks wise so I'm a bit intimidated lol.
I find quote pics incredibly grating as well as group pics where you can't tell who's who. Fake Moustache pics is probably hipster thing and it's super easy to take a goofy picture for a photo op. Sometimes a flag is unjustified because the person's picture is slightly obscured but still visible. Weird angles are remnants of Myspace angle style photos with the mirror shot eclipsing it. I absolutely loathe mirror shots unless it's done in good taste in that doesn't seem like the person is flaunting a feature of their body. Close ups of feet or other body parts are also terrible.

Good luck on that date man. I would argue that no woman is ever out of a guy's league since they're human too. However, their standards are ridiculously high. The fact that she gave you a chance says a lot.
the best thing about being a mod is seeing the comments people leave on flagged pictures. Sometimes you will get another mod who accidentally uses the comment section as a message sender and hits on the girl/guy.

Sometimes you get random boobs and whatnot so that's fun. Other times a guy will post his penis like 40 times and you have to look at the same penis in 40 different shades of light. Then you end up clicking delete for 5 minutes straight.
All completely true although I've yet to run into any boobs.

Did a moderating run earlier and ran into many GIS hits, animal pics, a pic of a car, a close up of a dude's dong, a few unclear shots which looked decent, and art work pics. It's tough being a moderator but someone's gotta do it. Sometimes mods leave snarky comments on a flagged picture.

In order news, left my number to the girl. She replied by laughing and saying that she would let me know when she wants to hang out. The ball is in her court now; if she's still super interested, then she'll hit me up, if not then no sweat off my back and on to the next ones.
 
For profile stuff, you can PM electricshake, Lucian Cat, Pau, Devolution, or someone else by checking the Girl GAF thread.

Since I found this.

Some basics:

Lots of pics. Show yourself with people, doing activities, less selfies more active you. Get someone who's honest and will tell you which pics look lame or aren't as attractive as other pics. You want to show off your best you. Don't use pics from 10 years ago that are bullshit but also consider that using some pic where you look like you don't give a shit, might give off the fact that you don't give a shit, so she won't give a shit.

Avoid lists of shit. If you feel the need to list off shows, hobbies, whatever, at least explain why you're into them or the last time you did something. For example, if you hike, say where and when you last did it.

Don't say you're funny or that other people think you're hysterical. Either come off funny in your profile or let her decide when you actually engage in conversation.

That's all I can remember right now.
 
So, a woman I starred and sent a decently sized message to responded to me tonight. It was a lengthy reply, and was going in a good direction. She said I was very interesting and she'd like to know more about me.

But she just started seeing someone and doesn't date multiple people at once.

At... least... I know someone would date me in a parallel universe?

SEpCU.gif
 

y2dvd

Member
Avoid lists of shit. If you feel the need to list off shows, hobbies, whatever, at least explain why you're into them or the last time you did something. For example, if you hike, say where and when you last did it.

I never thought about this. I got long lists of everything without saying why. Guess I'll add some description to them.
 

MercuryLS

Banned
Met the gf of my dreams on okcupid. She's absolutely amazing in every way, I feel like I hit the jackpot. I would kiss the okcupid founders if I could.

The funny thing is that I had the account for a year and did nothing with it. Over the last month I started to take it seriously and met up with my current gf. We hit it off instantly. After that I've been getting an avalanche of visits/messages. I had to disable my account as a result.
 
the best thing about being a mod is seeing the comments people leave on flagged pictures.
.

That one made me laugh:

ecu

Extreeeeeeme closeup! This picture should be deleted, if just for the subject's chances at finding a date. This shit's terrifying. Like I'm looking out a porthole in my submarine and right there, POW! the eye of the kraken. Looking in on me. Gives me the willies.

ECU D

ecu


:D

stealth edit:
oohhh and now I got an unpackaging picture of the Dark Souls II CE, noice


They should somehow mark this in my profile "This quality guy is non-problematic and sane and we trust him to judge other users's photos/profiles"




In other news, I was asked for sex at my place. She was a few years older than me but attractive. Eventful evening. Didn't even have to message first, I thought this kind of stuff only happens in porn. :p
But yeah, I should take this dating stuff more seriously I guess.
 
I can't send messages on the website or the mobile app, it just keeps telling me something went wrong.

Anyone have any insight as to why this might be?

Edit: Seems to have been an issue with the company WiFi.
 

Jhoan

Member
Quick update on the messaging. So that girl who's in an open relationship replied last night after I assumed she lost interest. Online dating is incredibly unpredictable. I replied back in hopes of pushing towards meeting up since I asked her if she's been to the new Barcade location that just opened up in the city on the topic of video games. We'll see where that goes.

I'll get back on hitting up multiple girls tonight. It bums me out that my brother has been getting messages out of the blue while I'm still struggling. He's had much more success on it than I've ever had. It doesn't help that he doesn't give me advice since he said I need to figure it out and struggle. But I'll keep my head held high and keep at it.
 

Piecake

Member
Well, so far so good. Ive noticed a steep drop-off in visits since the first week and like 75% of the people I message don't respond, but I already got a date out of it and 2 more set. So I am glad I finally signed up.

I doubt I am going to pursue the first one any further because, while it was fun and she was very nice, I really wasn't attracted to her (did not look like her photo) and did not feel any spark. Here is hoping the next two lead to something more.
 

y2dvd

Member
Sorry my fellow gafers. I went out with the most beautiful girl I've ever been on a date with and I couldn't close it. I think I mentioned before that she was outta my league. When we finally met in person, she exceeded her online pics. She was a 10/10.

I tried my best but I could tell she just didn't seem romantically attracted to me, though she did text me later that night that she had a great night. We conversated well but I think she's being kind and I'm not holding my breath if I don't hear from her again.

Though I failed lol, the fact that I was able to go out with such a hottie from OKC should encourage yall to keep trying. I know I will lol.
 
Sorry my fellow gafers. I went out with the most beautiful girl I've ever been on a date with and I couldn't close it. I think I mentioned before that she was outta my league. When we finally met in person, she exceeded her online pics. She was a 10/10.

I tried my best but I could tell she just didn't seem romantically attracted to me, though she did text me later that night that she had a great night. We conversated well but I think she's being kind and I'm not holding my breath if I don't hear from her again.

Though I failed lol, the fact that I was able to go out with such a hottie from OKC should encourage yall to keep trying. I know I will lol.

Bro, youre already setting yourself up for failure with that attitude. People can easily see self negativity through body language, but it rubs off too. Don't be like that because it's quite possible shes thinking the same way that you are. She might be like "Oh he's 10/10, but I can tell he doesn't like me... Sigh". Be confident dawg, dont forebode failure or it'll surely happen.
 

Piecake

Member
Sorry my fellow gafers. I went out with the most beautiful girl I've ever been on a date with and I couldn't close it. I think I mentioned before that she was outta my league. When we finally met in person, she exceeded her online pics. She was a 10/10.

I tried my best but I could tell she just didn't seem romantically attracted to me, though she did text me later that night that she had a great night. We conversated well but I think she's being kind and I'm not holding my breath if I don't hear from her again.

Though I failed lol, the fact that I was able to go out with such a hottie from OKC should encourage yall to keep trying. I know I will lol.

You really should ask her out again. Don't assume she isnt interested. Find out by asking her out. The worst that can happen is that you will be sad for a little bit.
 

Maddocks

Member
Sorry my fellow gafers. I went out with the most beautiful girl I've ever been on a date with and I couldn't close it. I think I mentioned before that she was outta my league. When we finally met in person, she exceeded her online pics. She was a 10/10.

I tried my best but I could tell she just didn't seem romantically attracted to me, though she did text me later that night that she had a great night. We conversated well but I think she's being kind and I'm not holding my breath if I don't hear from her again.

Though I failed lol, the fact that I was able to go out with such a hottie from OKC should encourage yall to keep trying. I know I will lol.

No no no no noooooo

Brah. come on. She went out with you, she agreed to spend a night with you, out of all the guys she could have picked, she picked you. You are so money and you don't even realize it. You failed at nothing, you need to turn that "she's out of my league" attitude into "she's lucky to go out with me" attitude. oooooze that confidence, you won half the battle when she said yes to the date. You viewed it with a negative attitude from the start, that no doubt effected your date. Ask her out again. Go into the date positive and in two weeks you will be posting in here how you landed the hottest girl because you knew you could. Always be positive, you set yourself up to fail before you even failed.

After all that, this is for the group. Don't you hate it when you write that to you perfect message then realize after you sent it and read it back that its completely the wrong tone. I just sent one of them. I wanted it to sound funny and lighthearted. Reading it back reads like I'm pretty much saying,"you are wrong, I own, git gud" so bad. Damn my silly brain.
 

MilkBeard

Member
No no no no noooooo

Brah. come on. She went out with you, she agreed to spend a night with you, out of all the guys she could have picked, she picked you. You are so money and you don't even realize it. You failed at nothing, you need to turn that "she's out of my league" attitude into "she's lucky to go out with me" attitude. oooooze that confidence, you won half the battle when she said yes to the date. You viewed it with a negative attitude from the start, that no doubt effected your date. Ask her out again. Go into the date positive and in two weeks you will be posting in here how you landed the hottest girl because you knew you could. Always be positive, you set yourself up to fail before you even failed.

After all that, this is for the group. Don't you hate it when you write that to you perfect message then realize after you sent it and read it back that its completely the wrong tone. I just sent one of them. I wanted it to sound funny and lighthearted. Reading it back reads like I'm pretty much saying,"you are wrong, I own, git gud" so bad. Damn my silly brain.
Yeah I agree with this, I think the potential is there. You just gotta have the confidence. She chose to go out with you, and even responded and said she had a good time. Muster the courage to try again and see what happens. It seems like you were going to give up anyway so you've got nothing to lose.

And personally, I haven't even gotten to the point where I can meet someone on OKC so you should take advantage of the opportunity that you have.
 

Piecake

Member
Really good time tonight. Hopefully she felt the same because I definitely want to pursue this (I am one of those oblivious people). *crosses fingers that she will say yes to a second date*
 

y2dvd

Member
I went into this with a pretty confident mentality as usual actually. I usually get nervous within the first 30 seconds of meeting someone and then I can shake it off and ooze confidence. She was so gorgeous that I remained nervous throughout the night. This is where I agree with yall in which I viewed her too highly and I could not get comfortable enough.

I know where I blundered up. I'll see what I can do to salvage this and will ask for a 2nd date. We'll see what happens.
 

stn

Member
@y2dvd

It happens. I was meeting some girls from Beautiful People and they were...beautiful (surprise). I failed to get a second date with both girls but I never had the whole "she's too good for me" mentality. Yeah, it felt shitty after I failed. Whatever.

Fake the confidence until it becomes real.
 
so hear me out:

After giving match.com a chance and not getting jack shit, I have a theory about ok cupid that I want to try out.

I want to create the most ridiculously over the top profile ever and see if women respond to ridiculous, off-beat humor.

Good idea or bad?

I mean, obvious photoshops of my face onto spiderman saving a baby, or onto a lumberjack with six pack abs even on his arms. Basically absurd BS that's not everyone else's boring ass profiles.
 
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