Support NeoGAF

sarcastor · Jun 4, 2015

Just saw this on Engadget:

https://www.indiegogo.com/projects/lovely-the-smart-wearable-sex-toy-for-couples#/story

Simply slide your penis into the hardware, get banging away and, when you're done, a mobile app will tell you your score. Statistics that are recorded by the device include the calories you've burned, the force of your thrusting and even your top speed. The software will even look at your performance and come up with one of 120 new positions that you can try next time out.

I always wondered how much thrust my pelvis was creating...

Mindlog · Jun 4, 2015

Why not just use a smartwatch?

Pepiope · Jun 4, 2015

Lovely

Nappuccino · Jun 4, 2015

Mindlog said:
Why not just use a smartwatch?

Are they waterproof?

Metal-Geo · Jun 4, 2015

You know what, I can't lie... I'd love to see how this thing was tested internally.

"Alright, compiling a new version. Jakub, I'll see you in the 'other room' in a minute... Bring a USB cable."

hitme · Jun 4, 2015

It just needs to be cumproof.

Strictly · Jun 4, 2015

Does it come in large?

RS4- · Jun 4, 2015

Tracked by the NSA.

edit - does it have leaderboards and achievements.

zephervack · Jun 4, 2015

WarMacheen · Jun 4, 2015

Yo, it was "Inspired by the nature"

Not just any ol' knockoff nature, but "the" nature.

marrec · Jun 4, 2015

I need a friend's list and daily challenges.

PaulExcellent · Jun 4, 2015

Is there a single player mode?

Shuggananas · Jun 4, 2015

The next 10 years are gonna be awful with all that connected bullshit

marrec said:
I need a friend's list and daily challenges.

don't forget achievements, facebook connectivity, reddit share button and a p2w dimension

darkwing · Jun 4, 2015

there should be a bigger GAF size

marrec · Jun 4, 2015

Brings a hole new dimension to "the internet of things".

styl3s · Jun 4, 2015

Shuggananas said:
The next 10 years are gonna be awful with all that connected bullshit

don't forget achievements, facebook connectivity, reddit share button and a p2w dimension

I'll wait for third gen that comes with condoms with bluetooth so if im on vacation and forget it or just didn't want to bring it i can still clock stats.

Mr-Joker · Jun 4, 2015

Does it have Amiibo support?

Staccat0 · Jun 4, 2015

cock rings freak me out

dork · Jun 4, 2015

zephervack said:

Ugh where does the pointy part go?

zephervack · Jun 4, 2015

Testing and QA for this must be a lot of fun.

Does Kick starter not allow projects like this?

dork said:
Ugh where does the pointy part go?

Clit

moist · Jun 4, 2015

PaulExcellent said:
Is there a single player mode?

Pair it with a Fleshlight?

The Beard · Jun 4, 2015

PaulExcellent said:
Is there a single player mode?

Lol.

Strokes per second.

joelseph · Jun 4, 2015

styl3s · Jun 4, 2015

Mr-Joker said:
Does it have Amiibo support?

They couldn't find any amiibo in stores to try to figure out the tech.

Affeinvasion · Jun 4, 2015

Damn I literally had this idea like two months ago.

Damon Bennet · Jun 4, 2015

Nö thx

Cow Mengde · Jun 4, 2015

The ultimate dick measuring contest. Imagine a forum dedicated to posting your stats and having online leader boards. There would be categories for how many thrusts per minute, thrust psi, how long you'd last before cumming, etc. Just imagine a bunch of guys trying to outdo each other.

zephervack · Jun 4, 2015

Damon Bennet said:
Nö thx

Exchange your blue balls for "Blue Penis"

UrokeJoe · Jun 4, 2015

This is a game changer.

Majine · Jun 4, 2015

"Compare against your friends!"

Dennis · Jun 4, 2015

Thanks Obama

Fireblend · Jun 4, 2015

Is it Android-based?

Corronchilejano · Jun 4, 2015

Sounds like it could get painful.

Marty Chinn · Jun 4, 2015

So wait, this thing is a $130 and then you have to pay for the sex on top of that? No thanks.

John Kowalski · Jun 4, 2015

Isn't this one of those orgasm denial things?

Wait no i got it around, cock rings are for prolonged sex right?

malfcn · Jun 4, 2015

Leaderboard and achievements?

zephervack · Jun 4, 2015

Cow Mengde said:
The ultimate dick measuring contest. Imagine a forum dedicated to posting your stats and having online leader boards. There would be categories for how many thrusts per minute, thrust psi, how long you'd last before cumming, etc. Just imagine a bunch of guys trying to outdo each other.

I imagine this scenario between couples:

--------------------------------------------
"Oh damn that was amazing"

"Lets check how long that was"

"oh, that only took 3 minutes"

Awkward silence.
-------------------------------------------

Sometimes ignorance is the bliss.

Cow Mengde · Jun 4, 2015

zephervack said:
I imagine this scenario between couples:

--------------------------------------------
"Oh damn that was amazing"

"Lets check how long that was"

"oh, that only took 3 minutes"

Awkward silence.
-------------------------------------------

Sometimes ignorance is the bliss.

People will be doing speed runs and live streaming them on twitch.

Shuggananas · Jun 4, 2015

Damon Bennet said:
Nö thx

bullshit 101

Fireblend said:
Is it Android-based?

OuyaOS

UrokeJoe · Jun 4, 2015

Add a smart condom that can check for when your partner is having an orgasm as well as the duration and we're going places...

Rapstah · Jun 4, 2015

dork said:
Ugh where does the pointy part go?

Inside the dick, duh? Hello, what planet are you on?

FuuRe · Jun 4, 2015

"Arena" rating ELO style and dailies please

Fenderputty · Jun 4, 2015

No sale without a ball grabber connection.

WarMacheen · Jun 4, 2015

darkwing said:
there should be a bigger GAF size

Stet · Jun 4, 2015

Yeah let's encourage guys to just thrust as hard and fast as possible.

cyba89 · Jun 4, 2015

Does it allow multiple accounts?

Htown · Jun 4, 2015

JDSN · Jun 4, 2015

Sex Toy expert its the best job title ever.

DJMicLuv · Jun 4, 2015

I'll just stick to my local Cockring Warehouse, thank you very much.

ZackieChan · Jun 4, 2015

JDSN said:
Sex Toy expert its the best job title ever.

The Founder has a wtf face that looks like he just heard about his own product.

DJMicLuv said:
I'll just stick to my local Cockring Warehouse, thank you very much.

iunderstoodthatreference.gif

Support NeoGAF

There's an Indiegogo for a cock ring that tracks "stuff"

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Banned

Member

Banned

Member

Banned

Member

Banned

Fail out bailed

Banned

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Member

Banned

Member

Member

Banned

Banned

Banned

Member

Member

Banned

Member

Member

Banned

Banned

Member

Member

Member

Banned

Member

Banned

Member

STOP SHITTING ON MY MOTHER'S HEADSTONE

Banned

Member

Member

Similar threads