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Gold Bond, aka god's gift to your balls

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kbear

kbear

Member
Whenever the Summer months roll around and the humidity kicks up, the first thing I do is go over to the local Rite-Aid and cop a few bottles of Gold Bond. You guys all know what I'm talking about: itchy, sweaty balls. I shower every day, sometimes twice, but my balls still get itchy & sweaty during extremely hot and humid days. It's been starting to get hot this week here in the Philadelphia area (around 80) so I've been sprinkling some of this miracle powder on the twins every morning and I've been fresh and itch-free ever since. If you haven't tried this shit yet and happen to be a guy, definitely add it to your next grocery list. Rank ass balls are a problem nobody should have to deal with in this day and age.
 
S

Sol..

I am Wayne Brady.
hopefully you don't go overboard and end up looking like you raped a wheel barrel full of fresh Columbian cocaine.
 
T

Tuvoc

Member
I love the Gold Bond medicated body powder. It's like mouthwash for your balls.

It's perfect for when you chaffe.
 
kbear

kbear

Member
Do you guys who don't have itchy balls... do you guys not shave / trim? Maybe that's why. And some people just sweat more or have drier skin, etc. It's all genetics.
 
W

whitehawk

Banned
kbear said:
Do you guys who don't have itchy balls... do you guys not shave / trim? Maybe that's why. And some people just sweat more or have drier skin, etc. It's all genetics.
Click to expand...
I itch very rarely, and I don't shave.
 
S

SCULLIBUNDO

Banned
kbear said:
Do you guys who don't have itchy balls... do you guys not shave / trim? Maybe that's why. And some people just sweat more or have drier skin, etc. It's all genetics.
Click to expand...

I trim. Here's an idea. Wash your fucking balls.
 
kbear

kbear

Member
Scullibundo said:
I trim. Here's an idea. Wash your fucking balls.
Click to expand...
Are you kidding me? I wash them every single day, as well as my ass crack. I'm one of the cleanest motherfuckers here. I'm OCD about that shit, man. Some peoples balls sweat and some don't. Mine do so I gotta Gold Bond 'em..
 
S

SCULLIBUNDO

Banned
kbear said:
Are you kidding me? I wash them every single day, as well as my ass crack. I'm one of the cleanest motherfuckers here. I'm OCD about that shit, man. Some peoples balls sweat and some don't. Mine do so I gotta Gold Bond 'em..
Click to expand...

Mine sweat, they just don't get itchy. Sweat doesn't make things itchy.
 
A

Alphahawk

Member
You know what really works for sweaty balls, Whitey tighteys, I've been wearing them ever since I outgrew diapers, and I certantly notice an increase in ballsweat when I'm just wearing boxers...
 
kbear

kbear

Member
Motherfuckers, it's not just about the itch. It's the sweatiness that's the major issue here -- the rankness that a hot, humid day brings to your jewels. That shit is a problem for every man out there. Gold Bond is your answer. I just rubbed my balls right before this sentence and took a wiff of my hand and it smells as fresh as a motherfucking daisy. That's what's up right there.
 
A

aoi tsuki

Member
i shave a couple times a week and i'm in the armpit of NC and have never had a problem with itchy balls. i can't imagine a woman licking my balls and tasting Gold Bond, unless it was like when i licked this chick's pits and they tasted of deodorant.

It's sweet and kinda tangy, in case you're wondering. Dip your tongue on some alum and you'll know what it's like, just without the fragrance.
 
G

giga

Member
Johnson_Johnson_Baby_Powder.jpg
 
Z

Zeke

Member
never used gold bond, I stick with baby powder with aloe. Everytime I get out of the shower I dry off powder them up. Use a little on the ass too. South Texas is humid as fuck so baby powder on the jewels is a no brainer.
 
Christopher

Christopher

Member
I've been telling peopole for ever after you shower dry off and throw some powder on your balls so you don't sweat down there last time I said it on this forum I was laughed about....
 
M

mattiewheels

And then the LORD David Bowie saith to his Son, Jonny Depp: 'Go, and spread my image amongst the cosmos. For every living thing is in anguish and only the LIGHT shall give them reprieve.'
so why does it feel like i'm getting freezer burn when i use it? for about 30 seconds it's a bit painful.
 
kbear

kbear

Member
Zeke said:
Use a little on the ass too.
Click to expand...
Where at? In your crack? I don't think I've ever tried that... my ass doesn't really sweat as much as my balls. It of course does when working out and shit. I might give that a shot, though. I always shower after taking a shit so I never get that feeling when you know you got a rank ass.
 
Z

Zeke

Member
kbear said:
Where at? In your crack? I don't think I've ever tried that... my ass doesn't really sweat as much as my balls. It of course does when working out and shit. I might give that a shot, though. I always shower after taking a shit so I never get that feeling when you know you got a rank ass.
Click to expand...
yup between the crack cuts the swamp ass down. Less swamp ass ftw!
 
V

VPhys

Member
kbear said:
Do you guys who don't have itchy balls... do you guys not shave / trim? Maybe that's why. And some people just sweat more or have drier skin, etc. It's all genetics.
Click to expand...

Yes I groom. Naturally, I sweat down there but have never had them itch.
 
T

TheClimaxan

Member
Make sure you use the Medicated Gold Bond though, that shit will get you right!

I worked for a Summer Mission Camp for 3 straight summers (may-august). My balls would have straight rotted off if it hadn't of been for the glory of the Bond.
 
T

Truelize

Steroid Distributor
I found about this wonderful product sometime within the last year, my balls thank me for it everyday.

My Balls - sponsored by Gold Bond
 
S

SS4Gogita

Henshin!
I don't shave or trim, but I guess I'm just scared of cutting myself down there. Still, I guess I better.

Also, I seriously didn't know that you could put Gold Bond on before you started itching. I always thought it was specifically for afterward. Whoops!
 
Z

Zeke

Member
I don't trim either then again I don't have super long ball hair so whatev. Powdering up is full of win girls appreciate the clean smell. Thats one of the best complements a guy can get from women.
 
O

oneHeero

Member
Thanks for the OP, its around 95 here and my balls sweat and itch all day. Never snapped that I could use baby powder or gold bond.
 
J

JRPereira

Member
Boxer briefs cut it down quite a bit for me, but I still powder whenever I have some around. Got to have fresh clean balls ya'know.
 
Z

Zeke

Member
I can't stand briefs I have 3 pairs of them but those are for emergency use. I like the freedom boxers offer.
 
T

thetrin

Hail, peons, for I have come as ambassador from the great and bountiful Blueberry Butt Explosion
Gold Bond is the fucking SHIT. If God were to bestow us with one last commandment, it would likely be "Thou shalt use Gold Bond to curb that nasty jock itch"

Suburban Cowboy said:
easier solution is just to wear briefs
Click to expand...

Sure, if you're like, a 6 year old boy.
 
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