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Jaden Smith is ... Static Shock (satire)

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M

Malyse

Member
lPa6Vg0.jpg


http://www.bleedingcool.com/2014/10/07/static-shock-comes-to-the-big-screen/

Uh.

Read the article.
 
N

Nikokuno

Member
He perform well in Karate Kid but there is better Afro American to fit this char and he need to bulk a little bit up too.
 
B

Bobby Roberts

Banned
From the article that I'm not sure was actually read all the way through:


BHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I’m… sorry…snicker… but… snicker … that…Bah… that…BHAHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

I’m not sure but I could have sworn I heard; “Goddamn Davis! If only he didn’t have those photos he’d never write for Bleeding Cool again!”

Then he hung up.

Come on people, a Static Shock movie? That makes no sense!

Why on earth would anyone want to do a movie or live action television show on one of the most popular animated shows EVER?

Don’t be silly people. I mean just because today, (well as of this writing, THAT today, lord knows when I will or if I will finish this. It’s only by the grace of Go..Rich, I still have a forum here and after my ‘interview’ that’s not looking so secure. Yeah, I’ve had a rough year but a weekly article every now and whenever? That can’t last much longer.

Haters! Try and contain yourselves!

But I digress. Checks in the mail Mr. David.

I ask again, why on earth would you want to take the most successful Black superhero in the DCU and make a movie out of it? Why just today, (maybe) Entertainment Weekly named Static Shock one of be best-animated shows ever from a comic book.

Is you stupid?

That makes no sense when you can make Superman Icon Black. Batman, Black the Flash’s wife Iris, Black, Spider-Man half Black, Captain America, all Black, The Avenger’s very Black. It makes NO sense what so ever!

I ask yet again, is you stupid?

Why make a movie when could simply colorize the movies made out of all the above? Duh. Shit we have plenty of great Black superhero movie which all made mucho bucks! In the thousands and thousands of dollars!! Who can forget the GREAT Blank Man? Solo? *Meteor Man? Shit! Don’t forget Warner Brothers and DC did the DADDY of all Black superhero movies.

How could anyone forget Steel?

I can’t and lord knows I’ve tried but that film is engrained in my mind. Shaq’s a friend and I remember the very day he asked me what I thought of the movie. I was so moved by that picture my answer was to start weeping like a little girl. A little girl remembering the day I saw my best friend, my puppy purposely run over by my beloved daddy.

I know, I know, there are millions of Static fans; in fact the ‘movie’ poster running with this article is an example of fans making their own Static Shock films. There are dozens maybe hundreds perhaps thousands of fan films out there.

If you go to https:/twitter.com/ReviveStatic you will see another in a long line of fan attempts to see Static made into a TV show or film. That’s just silly! I mean why not continue to make movies like the one about the Black Superman (Steel…sniffle) where Steel (the Black Superman, sniffle), sorry I need a moment…

Like I was saying; why not continue to make movies like the one about the Black Superman (you know the one) where the Black Superman doesn’t even get to wear the ‘S’?

Now that’s the way to use the old Hollywood noddle!

Also, who needs a movie about a hip young mega successful Black superhero that already has a MASSIVE fan base? Nobody obviously, not when you can make fantastic superhero TV shows where nobody’s really a superhero or wearing a costume?

Well, the TV’s on the wall, the popcorn is ready and the lights are out.

It also seems the lights are out at Warner Bros but after a long day of developing Green Lantern 2: The Rise Of John Stewart they deserve a good nights sleep.

Or maybe they’ve had enough sleep. They’ve been sleeping on Static for over 20 years.
Click to expand...

Article seems to be an opinion piece by Michael Davis, about how people talk about changing the races of fictional superheroes as opposed to just giving already existing superheroes their own filmed adaptations.

TL:DR - OP didn't read the article he was linking - which is a satire/opinion piece regarding black superheroes in film

Should probably change the title of this thread.
 
G

GraveHorizon

poop meter feature creep
I'm glad this isn't real, but I'm still kind of mad about the idea of Jaden Smith playing Virgil Hawkins. That would be pure bullshit.
 
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