I'm not saying I know what works for other people.
But I've discovered something that's been working for me and I guess I'll share it.
FYI, I suffer from high blood pressure (hereditary) and this has lowered that dramatically for me.
4 things I've been living by. Again, this isn't for everyone:
1) No caffeine. ZERO. I drink caffeine-free diet soft drinks. I really like Kroger's Diet Orange soda and their Diet Lemon Lime.
2) Calorie count. Every day. My target is 1100 calories intake a day. For other people you could go up to 1400 or 1500, but I want to actually lose weight at a good pace.
3) The food you DO eat must have high protein per calorie. This is how you can live with it. This is how you can eat not a lot but still feel full. A lot of these are weight watchers entrees. They have a ham and cheese egg scramble that's 180 calories for 18 grams or so of protein. I buy these for $2 a piece, grab a variety of them. I also like the lasagna, the three cheese ziti with meatballs, and the enchiladas.
4) Buy a treadmill and use it. I do this at home. It beats the hell out of feeling judged at the gym or dealing with the terrible weather. Every 2 days I get on my treadmill and I walk/run 3 miles. That burns around 300 calories in around 50 minutes. While you're doing this you can set up your phone or laptop and watch Youtube videos or listen to music. I've been really enjoying ChessNetwork classic matches.
So that's my routine and has been for a while. Sometimes I treat myself. Like, I'll skip lunch and then have Taco Bell for supper. Like 3 items and in the area of 1400 calories.
I actually enjoy the food idea, I don't feel like I'm starving, and I weigh myself daily and seeing the results.
Again, it's not for everyone. I skip breakfast AND lunch every day. I only drink calorie free stuff during the day. In that way I'm actually fasting every single day until I get home from work. Then I have 3 or 4 small meals in a 3 hour period, and I'm done again by 8pm.
Some would say this is too difficult and stuff, but to me it's actually been easy for me to leverage my workplace as a way of not eating food. I have more time during my lunch breaks to do other things, like go out shopping, browse the web, or go on walks.
Hope this info is useful to you or anyone else. I'm a short 5'5" guy. I went from 165 lbs to 155 lbs in 3 weeks of this. Currently at 148. My target weight is 135.
This is a really great post.
For reference guys, I'm 5'11.5" and only 148lbs, and my BMI is scary low [I'm ripped as fuck these days], and these are pieces of advice I even follow [actually, these are some of the things that helped me go from soft to fucking ripped].
Switched to decaf coffee, only decaf diet soda as treats [love my diet / caffeine-free coca cola sooooo much], started doing portion control, and stopped using the car if I could walk to accomplish the same task in under 40 minutes.
Only thing I'd add is no carbs after lunch, that's the Hugh Jackmann wolverine diet and it fucking works [and honestly, a piece of broiled salmon with greek yogurt and cucumber slices or tortilla-free taco bowls for dinner are my absolute junk food now anyway...].
Again, great post, especially love how you frame it so carefully so as not to assume what works for you works for everyone - but had to jump on and say actually this is just great general fucking advice!
edit: Also remember guys, if you eat right 5/6 days out of the week, you can ALWAYS have a treat day 1/2 days a week [maybe 1 one week, 2 the next, and keep it variable like that].
I eat so fucking clean these days [and it's amazing how you desire less junk the less you eat], and then I make deep fried breaded chicken burgers with bacon and cheese on Sundays and don't have to feel guilty about a single. fucking. bite.
Look up carb cycling as well, helpful to vary the amount of carbs you're ingesting from day to day to keep your body guessing - was another game changer for me [other than cutting them out after lunch 99% of the time, as well as reducing my carb portions to the actual food guide specifications, which seem freakishly small at first].
I'm in a very similar situation to you OP, except I have kept from re-gaining all the weight I lost. The thing that did it for me was to:
1. Keep it really fucking simple. Don't bother with any crazy diets or counting calories (unless that motivates you) or exercise that makes your stress levels shoot up. I just eat smaller portions and never stuff myself when I already know I'm full but otherwise have kept my normal lifestyle, more or less.
2. I make sure to avoid purchasing anything with more than 10g of sugar on the nutrition chart. Eating sugar makes me feel super hungry for the rest of the day and makes it completely impossible to follow the first point.
3. Don't beat yourself up and think you have failed permanently because you feel like buying a chocolate bar or a Ben & Jerry's once a week. It's fine, just don't binge that shit and maybe try spreading it out over the week instead of eating it all at once. I usually make that stuff last at least 2 days now, huge improvement
Just be mindful of the sugar cravings, obviously.
If you can't handle doing these on your own, don't be afraid to seek assistance from a therapist. The way you described your issue is definitely more of a mental framework thing than anything else. Trying to force yourself to exercise or intensely follow calorie counting apps if you actually hate doing those things won't do a thing.
again, another great post.
calorie counting does NOT work for me, nor for many people - your suggestion of just eating smaller portions is a very good one.
if you focus your meals around healthy proteins / healthy fats / veggies - you'll be surprised how satisfied you feel after consuming a very reasonable portion.
and yes, just fucking forget sugar people, abandon it, it's like nicotine or cocaine - once you pop you absolutely cannot stop with that shit.
save it for coffees out every now and again, special occasions, sugar should not be such a big part of your daily diet.
*also remember: carbs = sugar, really monitor your carbohydrate intake, as well as the quality of your carbs [ie - eat rice versus noodles, or at least rice noodles vs. wheat based noodles].
and avoid bread except for cheat days, and beer - just watch your fucking carbs they're making us all fat.