D
Deleted member 1159
Unconfirmed Member
Lots of us have been there OP. Tits or GTFO is not just a catchy phrase, it's a creed.
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Am I in the forever friend zone?
- Thread starter WaterAstro
- Start date
Holy shit
cr_blah_blah
Member
Sorry if I missed it but exactly what kind of job is it that you're spending months of your life helping her get? And what about it is she incapable of doing herself, so much so that you feel the need to be her life and career coach?
I'm really curious about this job.
I'm really curious about this job.
dickroach
Member
Forerunner
Member
PixelatedBookake
Junior Member
Yeah you should probably cut this chick outta your life. This sounds like a toxic situation that you keep voluntarily putting yourself in. Just go find another chick to go on real dates with and not jump through mental hoops to convince us (and yourself) that this girl is into you.
OP:
Sometimes I feel happy I was born homosexual, this is one of those times.
hairygreenpeas
Neo Member
Lmaooo, this is great. She must've been like, "Welppp! Time to playfully let him know that I don't think of him anymore as a friend! Hope he picks it up and never suggests anything more between us in the future!"OP:
I'm guilty of having done similar things as the girl.
i think he's financially supporting her, basically
Gay guys never friendzone lol?
From what I have seen from Looking, gay friendzoning includes sex.
I need to watch S2 of that
You're coming off as needy and it's more than likely put this person off to any sort of romantic relationship. You're readily available and attentive, and that's the problem. You've entered a system where she pushes a button and you run off beeping to her. Being readily available to someone at all times gives them access to free emotional crutch. Being readily available for someone is best only after you've built a solid, romantic foundation with a person. Most people admire a well-rounded individual who is confident in themselves. Someone who complements their personality. Someone with something new, exciting, or stimulating to add.
Even if you've been on a few dates or had sex, that's not a clear cut sign that you're viewed as more than a friend. If you want to salvage any sliver of a chance you have with this person, you must hit the goddamn brakes now. That, or let it go. I'd lean more towards letting it go simply because you've established a set of expectations for yourself and are potentially setting yourself up for heartache (ex: see 500 Days of Summer party scene.)
The problem is, her reality is different than yours. She puts her future before you, which is not a crime. You should take a page from her book and do the same. Establish yourself first and foremost. Do not put a potential romantic interest before yourself because it's not going to "win" their admiration. Leave that for when you're in a serious relationship. Work on yourself first. Don't be quick to jump or roll out the red carpet for someone.
Even if you've been on a few dates or had sex, that's not a clear cut sign that you're viewed as more than a friend. If you want to salvage any sliver of a chance you have with this person, you must hit the goddamn brakes now. That, or let it go. I'd lean more towards letting it go simply because you've established a set of expectations for yourself and are potentially setting yourself up for heartache (ex: see 500 Days of Summer party scene.)
The problem is, her reality is different than yours. She puts her future before you, which is not a crime. You should take a page from her book and do the same. Establish yourself first and foremost. Do not put a potential romantic interest before yourself because it's not going to "win" their admiration. Leave that for when you're in a serious relationship. Work on yourself first. Don't be quick to jump or roll out the red carpet for someone.
dragonelite
Member
What you mean friendzones with benefits?
Lemon Crest
Member
OP, one night in a couple of years right before you fall asleep, you'll remember this whole ordeal and cringe.
I guess you'll only cringe if you self reflect tho
Mediking
Member
Wow. Great post.
Ban Puncher
Member
Man, I get these done in like 10 "dates". What's taking him 50?
We should start taking some cues from them.
Your persona game is on point. How do you get heart strong enough to store them all?
Angry Grimace
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
I don't know what that is called. It sounds like a non serious relationship.
WhateverItTakes
Banned
I only wish OP would come back to this thread so he makes his 'lol, you guys crack me up. This shit totally isn't happening here btw, she just asked me to cosign a loan' post.
H.Protagonist
[-_-]/
At the speed things are moving, they might be on to their second child by now.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
No. The final step is she'll want to wait until she gets married, then get divorced, and then MAYBE she'll date OP.
This takes delusional to a whole another level.
Making a thread asking for advice. Then ignoring it all and saying its bad advice. Honestly, I dont even understand the whole scenario. Talking about not wanting a relationship but then saying they are in a relationship.
It has come to a creepy point where OP is either going to marry this girl (without her knowing) or wear her skin by page 17.
Making a thread asking for advice. Then ignoring it all and saying its bad advice. Honestly, I dont even understand the whole scenario. Talking about not wanting a relationship but then saying they are in a relationship.
It has come to a creepy point where OP is either going to marry this girl (without her knowing) or wear her skin by page 17.
ClosingADoor
Member
LordKasual
Banned
Just laughing at this thread again and looking at all the soul crushing pictures...people say that the "Friend Zone" is about women owing men sexual favors. I think this is a shitty explanation that kind of misses the key misunderstanding.
IMO, the "Friend Zone" is when a socially/sexually oblivious dude only operates off his own juvenile misunderstanding of what the opposite sex actually finds attractive. He does things that HE would want a sexually attractive woman to do for HIM. In his mind, he's the perfect boyfriend, and he cannot process why his actions aren't resulting in the sexual attention he's working towards. He blames his failure on being a "NICE GUY", not on the lack of other traits hes missing. He blames the woman for only going for "assholes", instead of accepting that his standards of what should be attractive are simply too narrow and egocentric. He writes her lack of attraction to him off as maybe just a phase? Maybe she just hasn't realized yet that she's wasting her time? He doesn't understand why it isn't working, and he's positive it isn't his fault. So he just waits, for when she "wises up".
But this is an advantageous situation to the woman, because she has someone who is emotionally feeding her positive energy...all she has to do is exist. And why should she forcefully break him off? If she's able to date other men, receive favors and gifts without asking, and have someone to talk to....like, what more could you ask for? It's not like she's asking for it, so obviously he must be doing it because he wants to? And i'm not giving him any sexual attention so he must not want it?
So all these hilarious pictures of "nice guys" doing things on FB, with the girl immediately posting "LOL BUT WE'RE JUST FRIENDS DOE" posts? She knows exactly what she's doing, and she knows exactly how he feels. There's just no logical reason (on her end) to explicitly tell the guy, "We will never date, you will never have sex with me, because I am not attracted to you" and possibly ruin all the (essentially) free benefits she's getting.
The friend zone is just a really pathetic and thorough demonstration of delusion lol.
Friendzone'd guys dont believe that women owe them sex, they just believe that sex is the only logical conclusion to their actions. So when they finally get fed up with failure, they just come to the new conclusion that women are morons who only use men and want what's not good for them.
IMO, the "Friend Zone" is when a socially/sexually oblivious dude only operates off his own juvenile misunderstanding of what the opposite sex actually finds attractive. He does things that HE would want a sexually attractive woman to do for HIM. In his mind, he's the perfect boyfriend, and he cannot process why his actions aren't resulting in the sexual attention he's working towards. He blames his failure on being a "NICE GUY", not on the lack of other traits hes missing. He blames the woman for only going for "assholes", instead of accepting that his standards of what should be attractive are simply too narrow and egocentric. He writes her lack of attraction to him off as maybe just a phase? Maybe she just hasn't realized yet that she's wasting her time? He doesn't understand why it isn't working, and he's positive it isn't his fault. So he just waits, for when she "wises up".
But this is an advantageous situation to the woman, because she has someone who is emotionally feeding her positive energy...all she has to do is exist. And why should she forcefully break him off? If she's able to date other men, receive favors and gifts without asking, and have someone to talk to....like, what more could you ask for? It's not like she's asking for it, so obviously he must be doing it because he wants to? And i'm not giving him any sexual attention so he must not want it?
So all these hilarious pictures of "nice guys" doing things on FB, with the girl immediately posting "LOL BUT WE'RE JUST FRIENDS DOE" posts? She knows exactly what she's doing, and she knows exactly how he feels. There's just no logical reason (on her end) to explicitly tell the guy, "We will never date, you will never have sex with me, because I am not attracted to you" and possibly ruin all the (essentially) free benefits she's getting.
The friend zone is just a really pathetic and thorough demonstration of delusion lol.
Friendzone'd guys dont believe that women owe them sex, they just believe that sex is the only logical conclusion to their actions. So when they finally get fed up with failure, they just come to the new conclusion that women are morons who only use men and want what's not good for them.
Just make sure to keep your social activities on point and take on a burger challenge from time to time. Always stay silent, nod and agree with what they're saying. It never fails!
Man, that scene was too real.
Also, the gif with the asian guy is fucking gold.
but they'll still be just friends
Angry Grimace
Two cannibals are eating a clown. One turns to the other and says "does something taste funny to you?"
I heard mugwort baths help impress her friends too.
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
Holy shit this guy is awesome
If it's a gay friend zone between two guys I can totally see sex being on the table at some point. Boner brain is a crazy thing
Friends with compound benefits.
Angry Chair
Member
This is one hell of a thread.
Is that her in his profile pic? Dude was trying way too hard.
OP:
Is that her in his profile pic? Dude was trying way too hard.
LordKasual
Banned
TarpitCarnivore
Member
There's the bullshit again about women purposely using nice dudes because it's advantageous to them.
LelouchViBritannia
Member
Love the gaf honesty. Sometimes we need to hear the brutal truth.
Not surprising, this guy was talking about activating their sex hormones or some shit the other day.
DongBeetle
Banned
In this thread???
FantasticMrFoxdie
Mumber
oh lordy been out of this since pg2
lawd
lawd
Jason's Ultimatum
Member
I don't think women like that are EXPLICITLY using nice guy friend as an emotional sponge. I just think some women don't have the heart to tell the guy. It has nothing to do with attention.
I see it almost like ghosting a guy who they don't connect with after a date.
No, in the Dating OT
You're saying the friend zone isn't "real"? Of course it's real. And yes, typically it has a negative connotation. I mean, it isn't a magical zone you inexplicably arrive at keeping people from dating, all it means is one person has romantic feelings and the other doesn't - for whatever reason. AKA a one-sided relationship. That is definitely what is happening here.
And... she is getting lots of attention from him even after rejecting his advances. That's what I mean by "free", not because she owes him anything (she absolutely does not), but because he continues to invest time and energy in a relationship that he's not getting what he wants out of. He's always around and always helping her out. Helping people out isn't in itself a bad thing, but he still likes her and is currently waiting for her to "get her career straight" because then she said she'd date him. And again, if he's 100% okay with that, then carry on I guess. But from the OPs post he obviously isn't. Excuses like the one she gave are common ways to let people down easy, but the OP is sticking around. That's why I think he should either move on or ask her again.
FAKE EDIT: It sounds like he did ask again and got more excuses. I dunno , I'd cut my losses at this point but again if this is 100% what he wants then that's his choice.
Diseased Yak
Gold Member
Women aren't machines that you put kindness coins into until sex comes out.
